I can't believe im actually doing this shit. I've been planning this for a while but never actually had the gall to actually get up and do it. But I recently decided that im just going to..fuck it..right?. Anyway. First of all…
Disclaimer:
--These are MY thoughts, MY opinions, My process, and MY ideas and if you want to say something against it..Go fuck yourself.
--Some stuff may be over-exaggerated or under played for comedic effect, if you take offense to that, then you can…go fuck yourself
--if you intend to judge me, call me angry, bitter, ignorant, weird, an asshole, a jerk etc, I frankly don’t give a shit…Go fuck yourself
--If you have no sense of humor or are so tight minded with a stick up so far up your ass it makes your ears itch…you might not want to go past the Horizontal Line.
--There is no schedule attached to this, there could be 3 rant-isodes in one week, or none in 3 months…it will come out when im irked.
--Anything in (__)’s is just an inside voice. We all have one and if you don’t, you can go fuck yourself.
--There will be tons of profanity, if you don’t like it, you can go fuck yourself
--I am not trying to say im Right or Wrong, its just a thought process I go through and if you can't understand it…Go fuck yourself
--Im going to generalize…A LOT…if you take it personally…hahaha..you can go fuck yourself!!!
--The whole rant is free styled, meaning no list of topics, no prep, nothing, just the way I speak, actually its dumbed down because of the Eye in the Sky (GaG) J.
--There will be a lot of use of the words “Go fuck yourself” and if that doesn’t sit right with you, you can go fu…ugh..do I really have to say it?
My first rant is that GaG said that “hint” thing about where you have to leave “…images, GiFs, video etc”…seriously? What are we in? kindergarten?, if you can't read an article without the help of pictures..you need to take your ass BACK to kindergarten. People read 300 page novels and about 580 page Dictionaries without pictures…if you can't deal, don’t read it.
I don’t think my rants will actually have a pic, but for where it doesn’t, I will be sure to leave one of these out there.
Maybe I should employ @WTFliberals to get me some pics and GiFs…he had one where he had a person shaking their head with the words “Triggered” as a meme…I fell out laughing.
Back to my rant…Its only a matter of time before GaG sends me a “Cease and Desist” letter lol…Im gonna be irritating a lot of justice warriors.
Lets hop into the next rant, what is with this female support train thing? Don’t women know that just hurts the relationship? Im going to try to come up with a scenario:
Ugh..i hate coming up with names.
Tina: So me and Tony went out for coffee this morning and this woman passed by and he looked
Rita: What?! He looked? And you were right there?
Tina: Yes he did. The disrespect.
Rita: Yes, he totally disrespected you, you need to confront him and tell him…you deserve better than some guy who is looking at another woman. I bet you he is planning on leaving you or cheating.
Later on that evening
Tina: Todd, I noticed you looking at that woman this morning
Todd (clueless): what woman?
Tina: The one with the blonde hair, white blouse, big tits and big ass.(slowly building an image for Todd who had LONG forgotten about that woman)
Todd: oh that one, yea…(in his mind “she Did have some big assets and she was fine too…and guess what, she wasn’t fucking nagging me”).
Next morning
Tina: can't believe it, he left me last night…he went to see that other woman.
Rita: Told you he was planning to leave you, told you he doesn’t deserve you.
Really…? That was the problem…?. If you want advice on males, how about you go to a fucking MALE so you can get some perspective and know how to act. A guy could have easily squashed that with, “did he leave you there at the café and run after her?”…”no”
“then you are good”. Now, the guy is generalized as being “bad”, but really, who facilitated all that, but someone was in such a hurry to be validated, they didn’t fucking think. I bet you in about 3-4 weeks Rita will end up hooking up with Todd lol. Just saying.
If I want advice on a girl I’m already with..i don’t ask the fellas…here is how it would go.
Me: Yea, Tina came in last night mad as hell about some woman
Ron: Do you know her?
Me: Fuck no, she just walked by, but then she went off thinking that I was making plans
Ron: Were you?
Me: no, don’t even know the lady…
Ron: so what happened
Me: I went to find the lady, had to check Rita’s theory and description right?.
Ron: That’s kinda bogus dude…hey, can you spot me?.
(hahaha…)
And the story ends there. Guys won't give others specific instructions and even if they did…the other guy most likely won't take it. But women? Smh. I ain't perfect…ive had questions over the years…but when I really wanted to solve the problem…I asked Women. Sadly, I always get the same shit…:
“oh you have to listen to her, you have to understand where she is coming from, she thinks you might go after her…” blah blah fucking blah
Really? Did I make a move? Do women realize that part of the reason why guys eyes dart around like that noticing everything (including that woman) is partly for her own protection?? That we are actually paying attention to the surroundings (which the woman happened to be a part of.) Oh its fine, when we have to stop someone from clubbing you over the head from behind…but our eyeballs can't follow passing objects…go fuck yourself. Swear, if I actually had that conversation and some guy was pulling up behind her to bludgeon her over the head with a bat…I’d just smile n nod...lol…apparently…I shouldn’t look
That female support train you ladies have is hurting you more than its helping you. Its nice to have someone to talk to (lord knows we guys don’t want to) but the decision is ultimately yours and you need to own that.
I purposely put me in that situation instead of another name…because that is what I’d do..dont accuse me of shit I didn’t do. In a “regular” case, the guy will start apologizing and probably get pussy cut off for 3 days (most women aren’t as forgiving) oh, my bad, 2 weeks, as “punishment” lol…
Which brings me up to my next rant…punishment? Im gonna employ an analogy here. Guys…I may come at women a lot, but that is because I don’t know what level of Cuntery I can use to explain to you guys that as irritated as I am with them, you guys irritate me more. You let the shit happen. Punishment…you know, the first time I heard about that stuff, like the “sleep on the couch”, “get out of the house” “don’t wanna talk to you” thing, I did not believe my ears…that was a thing?
I was at work yesterday and I came up with an analogy that blew my mind. I remembered a youtube video…(im currently trying to find it, you gotta see it…wait…this is real time…wait….. FOUND IT!!!)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3nVOjLsIGHs
and I, in my ranting mindset, twisted that…I can name all three characters.
Chicken= VAGINA!!!
Dog = Men
Guy in the Cart = Women
Women know you want the vagina, so they set parameters and have you chasing that shit, what you don’t seem to understand is that while you are doing that you are just helping them. My inner voice actually came up and said
“imagine if that dog decided…’fuck that chicken’ and stopped”…now the cart rider is Fucked…why? Because the dog ain't going, and that’s what I've been trying to preach. Guys…stop chasing the vagina lol…true intentions come out when you actually stop.
That shit is dangled in front of us…makes us get high-class jobs, nice cars, picket fenced houses in the suburbs, all for what?? But when we break it down to the Nine’s…(the bottom)…we only need nothing but 3…meanwhile that chicken is running up the miles…and most, if not all’, women need like 24,106 things (and counting).
I know at this point im coming off as one of the names I've been called (please refer to Disclaimer and do what it says), but for real…im just pointing out stuff that people don’t pay attention to.
Fellas we are dealing with INTELLIGENT creatures…very intelligent…but they have one minor flaw…the same one we got…(and this one goes out to @JustAnotherGirlie
who doesn’t take any shit from me) We are all one and the same. We both do things to each other, but obviously you don’t realize it when you are the doer, its only when you are the receiver/victim that you pay attention.
Brings me to another rant…like I said, been called a number of names by women, been told derogatory comments, had my past, present AND future being determined by those cunts (yes, I fucking said it…the first one of many to come) that don’t even know me. (refer to disclaimer for specific names), when all im simply trying to say is…why the labeling? Why can't we all just get along?.
The problem I see, when it comes to this gender war, are men (Yes, im fucking included). All Fawning and meandering and Pandering…that’s why women are so hype…to the point where they are using US (men) against US(men) but you morons (men) are too stupid to see that. They are using some version of Darwinism…just selecting. And the idiots don’t even know.
I feel like I should wrap this up. I did NOT do a good job of this Rant-isode…but I can tell a LOT of people will be pissed (see you in the comment section!) but these topics were terrible…analogies were off-center…basically…I ranted but not funny enough. Well, guess I've got to do better…right?
Piss some more people off, make some more off-center jokes? I think this is more for GaG.
Ugh, those fucking pictures…gotta find some.
Rantisode 2 coming up soon. I will be doing that from an hour long I have. Now go ahead and burn me.
Hahahaha…is this shit idiotic or what…ive been laughing the entire time I've been writing this…I think Rant-isode 2 might actually be deeper, might need to pull up some notes…, hopefully funnier. I hope I stepped on some toes…
I know the women are going to…3/4 of the shit I said was true…if you look past my colorful description of events lol
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