Uncomfortable while being fingered, kinda embarrassed?

[Anonymous]

Last night a friend of mine started to make out with me. Eventually he started spreading my legs apart and started massaging me with then without my underwear on which felt nice. Then when I started fingering me it felt so uncomfortable. Almost as if he was being too aggressive with it. It didn't hurt at all though I just wish he was a little more gentle. He stopped cause he could tell I was uncomfortable now I feel embarrassed. Is this a normal experience? Also when making out he started biting my lip, not nibble it was a full on bite and it hurt like hell. Was he too aggressive am I just not used to it? I've never been with anyone this aggressive before.

[Peter0]

You guys need better communication. Every guy is different. Every girl is different. And the best way to figure out what kind of girl/guy/etc you're with is talking. It can be anything from "oh, I like that" to "I much prefer a light touch right here, moving slowly up and down." "Gentler, like I'm a ripe peach you don't want to bruise" might work? (Clearly, I should write erotica ;p)

Also, read up on consent (you might try https://www.pinterest.com/pin/57420963972700319/ )

I do have one bit of immediately practical advice: lube. Not all women produce buckets of lube, and if you're dry, thing will be more uncomfortable. Find something you like (silicone rocks, and if you're not using condoms coconut oil is the *best*) and have it on hand. As it were. If I'm fingering my gf, I will sometimes use coconut oil; otherwise she doesn't always enjoy it.

Have fun, communicate, play safe :)

(ps - try not to feel embarrassed - it's 110% okay to want to feel pleasure when you're having sexy times, and there's a pretty darn good chance he's interested in making sure you enjoy yourself :) So go ahead and let him know what you like!)

[Asker]

I'm pretty sure you are right about not being wet enough. I do remember not feeling turned on at all and questioning if I was even wet down there.

[Peter0]

Coconut oil FTW. It's okay to take things slowly and get used to the things you want a little bit at a time :) (also works for handjobs if you want to go there, because you won't be using condoms :p )

[Steele12345]

You should tell him what you want guys are thank full for input, you are young and very vanilla as you get older you will start to like different things, when I was just a bit older that you I had a girlfriend that was about 6-7 years older , she was a tiny hot little Asian thing. She was very aggressive and a biter and I can tell you on the sex level she was the best I ever had and I have had quite a few lol but guys really like agressiveness in woman.

[Asker]

I wasn't planning on anything happening it just did. Aggressiveness isn't exactly a bad thing just only when it hurts.

[kaylaS91]

Combination of him being too aggressive, as well as you not being to familiar with that sort of thing just yet.
Next time that occurs, just tell him. It's easy for a guy to play a little too rough, used to going faster as they do with themselves, as well as not familiar with how many more nerves are concentrated in the clit versus their dick as a whole.

[murphtheman]

Your "guy" needs to be tought how to have sex! nibbling ears/neck/nipples is ok sucking those is ok also. Next time your "getting busy" start by being direct and tell him "let me show you whats really turns me on" and then teach him!! believe me we (men) are very eager students. Example my gf can have an exsplosive orgasm if I pull back her clitoral hood and just barely touch her clit ( makes her crazy)

[Asker]

Oh I believe you, but I didn't think anything was going to happen it just kinda did. Also I'm quite submissive.

[murphtheman]

You can express what you desire and still be submissive, don't confuse those issues

[Asker]

I'm just stating that fact. Plus it was a one time thing and we didn't have sex.

[Klaatu51]

i gues you don't like fingering much, which isn't a bad thing in my opinion :-)

[wankiam]

you should show him how you like it plus guys love to watch a girl masturbate

[Asker]

I've heard that before

[wankiam]

because its true... you won't regret it if you show him. after all us guys need to show you girls now and again too

[everydaynormalguy]

50nshades of that guy

[Marstalk]

Well just tell him what you like. He probably does not know.

[Anonymous]

Is that your first time being fingered/fucked?

[Asker]

To that extreme, yes. We didn't fuck though I'm a virgin.

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe because of that.. and I guess you weren't wet enough, he should have licked you first before fingering, it should have felt better

[Asker]

Now that you mention it, it felt kinda dry (hopefully that makes sense) and I really wasn't turned on at all.

[Opinion Owner]

He didn't do it well, believe me girls need a lot of foreplay before fingering/fucking you can't just put your fingers in the pussy and that's it, no.. you see what turns you on, something depends on every girl and tell him.. guide him