Sexual Relationships
+1 y

Was he in the wrong for not stopping when it started hurting me?

He is my roommate that I've shared the apartment with for almost 3 years now. During isolation we had sex for the first time, it was intense since we've had this sexual tension for the longest. He got inside me did a one two thing it when he went all in went to war and it started hurting me I asked him to stop and tried to slide away from him because I just needed to have my legs closed to cope with the pain. He didn't move further just put pressure on me and said "shh it's ok baby I got you" then started moving slowly and said "I'll go slower". We ended up doing our thing and things have been cool ever since, I was talking to my best friend about my first time with him and she said it was lowkey disrespectful that he didn't allow me to move when I said I wanted to stop. Me and her ended up fighting, so what do you think? Do you see any red flag in the way he responded?
0 3

Most Helpful Girls

  • Yes and no.
    Depends on how you told him to stop.
    When I’m with my guy I tell him to stop but in a “keep going” type of tone.

    If I really wanted him to stop I would literally push him off of me (depending o my he position.)

    But, if you genuinely wanted him to stop and he didn’t then yes it’s wrong. But it could’ve simply been a kid communication. He probably thought due to your tone that you liked it... like we’re you moaning when you told him to stop? Either way I don't know.

    I think you would’ve knew in that exact moment if it was a red flag, so I’m gonna say no it isn’t. Just communicate with him next time to pull out.

    I honestly have no idea though.

    • Side note: sorry for the typos. I hope you get my point lol

  • YES it’s incredibly wrong. He’s pushed your boundaries and it’s NOT okay for anyone to continue having sex after one party told you to stop. Depending how you see it, it could classify as rape. Your friend is just looking out for you, please remember you have a right to revoke consent whenever.

    I read a comment on Reddit where these friends had anal sex, and the woman said she didn’t like it, and she wanted him to pull out. He did the same thing, shushing her, and pushed her down when she tried getting up. She let it happen, and went on her way. She was raped. When you say no, it means no.

Most Helpful Guys

  • He should have stopped. But he kept on going and it didn't hurt afterwards. So you're fine. Talk a little sense into him about boundaries and what to do next time when you say stop or maybe he does. Ask him how he feels about that time that you told him to stop and he didn't. See what's his answer

  • It sounds to me like it's resolved itself on its own. Maybe tell him that if you say stop, he HAS to stop, right then.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

2 7

  • If you mean like he kinda raped you, no. he should have stopped but it's not a big deal. he didn't mean wrong anyway. next time be more assertive.

  • Let me ask you this. Was the end result good for you?

  • I think he gave you what you needed.

  • Not wrong. he was in heat 🔥
    if your boyfriend stopped when you're horny and desperate will you immediately calm down. No Sex drive isn't like ON- OFF switch which can be changed in instant. Chill ❄🍃
    Make sure to use lube and communicate how slow/deep you want next time.

  • hmm thats a tough one bc i wasn't there and its hard to imagine exactly. just curious tho why was it hurting? did he have a big dick? did it feel better when he slowed down?

Show More(4)

Related Questions

If women don’t enjoy penetration then why do they like sex?
What makes someone of opposite sex good in bed for you?
Is getting a circumcision the right answer in my case?
What is the safest way to dispose a used condom that was not your husband?
Home >  Sexual Relationships  > Was he in the wrong for not stopping when it started hurting me?