Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health I recently had a conversation with a friend over FB about anal sex experiences and when I recounted the second time I ever had anal my description came out kinda disturbing. I was having it with my then-boyfriend a couple of years ago.
He had an incorrect mindset about anal sex. The first time, I involuntarily yelped in pain and his anger and frustration shown in his voice when he said to me "it's anal! it's going to hurt!" (it was like "you're an idiot for not realizing that").
It became extremely painful, one of the worst pains I ever felt in my life and when I told him to take it out (I was clear enough, he could hear me). I could hear the pain and panic in my voice. He didn't take it out. He continued in a way he thought wouldn't be painful for me it seemed. I don't know exactly was going on in his mind. Regardless, it was still incredibly painful. He was completely on top of me, lying flat down and I couldn't do anything. I can't remember exactly how long the pain lasted, only seconds but I still remember how severely painful it was in those seconds. The pain became more bearable so I didn't need him to stop anymore. Eventually, he did take it out, I think he got sick of me not being able to do it without me yelping and then, without asking me, went to put it inside of my vagina which is absolutely disgusting. When I told to take whatever he had already put in OUT he got angry at me and furiously got off me and rolled over on his side facing away from me. It was a really horrible night.
This is how it happened. I've been so confused ever since I typed out what happened. My friend told me that is technically rape and another friend who I spoke to told me it's flat-out rape.
I'm not traumatized or anything. I have that horrible memory and these feelings of confusion.
How would you feel if you're partner didn't stop when you asked them to? Would you feel guilty if you didn't stop when you were asked to?
Was I technically raped?
Anonymous
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What Girls & Guys Said
10 24It was rape hun 😭😭😭😭
Not rape
Yeah, thats rape.
Same thing happened to me except the guy was also beating me in my head until I went unconscious. It's rape
And beating is an assault, too. Well, some males got mad on actually WANTING to have anal. They (not me) should sloooooow-down and relax by taking back their (explainable) horniness and pay attention close to the penetrated partner.
This is a perfect example of why it isn't worth the risk of even trying to fuck a girl these days. It wasn't perfect, I didn't enjoy every second of it, he made me feel PAIN, and it was a horrible experience, so HE RAPED ME! Typical. He took it out when you told him to; he got off you and rolled over to face away from you, and you're making out like it was more horrible, and more "flat-out rape", because he didn't continue fucking you until he made you feel good, after you told him to pull out and stop? THAT would have been rape. What he did was simply get frustrated because you demanded the impossible. As all girls do these days. You're not worth it; none of you are.
I don't think you actually read the question. How did she "demand the impossible"?
@snowangle "Oh, I wanna have an anal sex experience- I want you to fuck me in the ass! And I want you to fuck my ass as hard as you can! But I don't want it to hurt at all at any stage, and I don't want to feel the slightest bit of discomfort- I want it to be completely painless, warm and soft and cozy and perfect in every way, filling my heart (and my backside) with nothing but rainbows of purest ecstasy! If you can't make that happen, if you can't make me experience multiple orgasms all the way through from the instant that you insert your dick, and if you can't guarantee that I won't be at all sore afterwards, then it's all your fault, because you're the man- take responsibility! You couldn't make it perfect, so I ordered you to stop, and you did; but still, I was soo disappointed! It was such a horrible night; you failed to fuck me just right, the way that the billionaire playboy vampire of my dreams would have! You didn't pleasure me, so you RAPED ME!"
😂 Wow. First of all, she never said the circumstances to how she agreed to have anal sex (therefore you just made all of that up). Second, and most importantly, he DIDN'T stop immediately after she said to. He did eventually, out of frustration rather than respect for her, but still subjected her to intense pain for several seconds after she told him stop. Literally it's not that hard to care about your partner's well being.
To worsen things, judges has become feminists... VERY bad for the male! He better hangs himself.
Techinically it's important that you reinforce in his mind and heart THIS IS RAPE, while both of you know a court would be hard pressed to find it so considering the facts - this is ignoring NO evidence, making this case even weaker.
Once you share a bed regularly, many courts consider justice to be served only by those in the bedroom and if at odd, simply leave the bedroom and partner.
If he's showing no gults then rich or poor, he wears the badge of The Entitled, the sophomoric brain controlled by porn & little pest head below + these facts state... no yell... there's no love in him for you, so if lust is enough, keep him
That seems like rape
I didn't see where you told him to stop.
Seems more like a witch hunt. Or should I say "rape hunt".
"And when I told him to take it out" can you even read?
@Patrickjv Let me clarify myself for morons - "Before he fucking started" - Not a afterwards. If she says stop after you get started then of course you fucking stop. Im talking about BEFORE he got started. Key word - BEFORE. When she said stop he got off. I'M talking about "fucking before he got started".
Sorry but where did you see the part where she said stop before he got started? She told him to stop while he was inside her (and he didn't, at least not right away).
@snowangle That's the same thing I'm saying. Reread my paragraph and read carefully. - Let me clarify myself for morons - "Before he fucking started" - Not a afterwards. If she says stop after you get started then of course you fucking stop. Im talking about BEFORE he got started. Key word - BEFORE. When she said stop he got off. I'M talking about "fucking before he got started".
She didn't tell him to stop before he started. Only after he started - And when she said "stop" he got angry and got off of her. There was no fucking rape. I'm tired of this stupid as rape culture here in the U. S. It's a bunch bull$hit.
Band Wagon #metoo type of bull$hit.
He got off of her, *eventually*. Not immediately. Oy. You think YOU'RE tired of rape culture? Lol.
@snowangle I think he means when he went to stick it in my vagina. I included that part mainly because it was the cherry on top of the horrible night. I don't think he read the anal part. that's where my ex didn't stop when i asked him too. by the way thank you for support
Ah I gotcha. Yeah lol that's asking for an infection!
@Patrickjv Maybe another zombie? I mean, not-sleeping person. ;-)