What do you think of the concept of male authority? How do I introduce my girlfriend to this?

I've decided I'm going to start exercising my male authority over my girlfriend. I'm not going to be ashamed of my god given place in a relationship. I blame failure of past relationships on not exercising my male authority. I'm planning on telling my girlfriend that if we're going to be together she's going to be a woman and respect me and obey me and I'm going to be a man and exercise my authority over her.

How should I tell my girlfriend about my beliefs and introduce her to her subordinate place as a woman? I'm afraid she will want to leave me but I'd rather her leave me now because I won't let feminism make me ashamed of my place as a man than for her to leave me after arguments and stuff come between us because we kept bitching at each other because I was too pussy to be a man and exercise my authority by reminding her of her place.
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Superb Opinion

  • Your male authority huh? Is that really a thing?

    See, I was brought up by my parents to treat everyone as I would like to be treated and a relationship is a two way street where both partners are equal partners. The moment one starts to dictate how the other should act or what they can or can't do, it's no longer a relationship. All there is left is control and that's not a relationship.

    And trying to maintain that control not only starts to become exhausting in short order, but you also start to resent each other. Paranoia ensues, arguments follow, trust is gone out the Window and you only create more reasons for the other to do the complete opposite of what you expect, up to and including cheating and/or breaking up.

    And with all that shit to deal with, what do you actually gain? Not much.

    The reality is that there is no simple way to break this to your partner and it will most likely end with her leaving you. As you said you're OK with that, that isn't going to help you find another girl who will tolerate this mentality.

    Think of it this way:
    We spend 18 or more years of our lives being told what to do, how to act, and how to conduct our lives by our parents, teachers and others. You finally become an adult, move out, get a job and finally able to decide the path your life takes. Now consider getting into a relationship with someone who decides they want to dominate everything about your life, tells you what you can and can't do, tells you how they expect you to act and how to treat them, even if it's to the detriment of your own well being. They essentially become your new parent and you're back to being treated like a child again.

    Would you enjoy that? I sure as Fk wouldn't. So chances are, your partner isn't going to like that either and the greater majority of women out there won't either. This will result in you being stuck as a single for a long time because you just limited yourself to 2% of the female population.

    Look, I get you had some shitty partners in the past. You got hurt. Or you got taken advantage by them and don't want that to happen again. I've been there too. I've been cheated on by two past partners. Both also tried to change who I was into what they wanted me to be and tried to control my life. Being young and inexperienced, I figured this was what relationships were about.

    But I took those experiences and learned from them, so I could avoid other assholes like those ex's in the future. And I did. Married now with a kid and both of us trust each other and also don't try and control each other. We each have our spaces and we have our own freedoms and respect one another in equal fashion. Neither of us tried to change the other into what we want and accepted each other for who we are... Warts and all.

    To get to this point though, it takes time, experience and it also takes you risking the chance of getting hurt again and having trust broken.

    Thats what relationships are all about. They're not about domination, control or demanding more authority over the other.

    I wouldn't even want that kind of "authority" over my partner anyways, because that just sounds like parenting and taking care of a dependent. I don't need that shit in my life.

    Besides, what you're after is a two way street. If you expect this sort of thing from your partner, then you better be ready to meet their expectations too... Which means you better be able to provide every financial and emotional need they have to warrant that level of authority.

    If you can't, then you're setting yourself up for failure more than you realise.

    • Oh and I'm no feminist. I think new age feminist are full of shit. Relationships are about equality between the two of you. In the eyes of the law, married couples are considered as one. The term partner also relates to being equal to one another... Partners. You're not her employer and she isn't your employee. Sure each will take on different responsibilities in the relationship, but you're both working towards a common goal. And if you're with someone who won't treat you the same way and wants to control you, take your own experience and my own experience and dump their ass. You don't want to be dealing with that for the rest of your life. There are still decent girls out there who can still treat you with respect while doing the same to her... You just have to sift through the shit heads first, as we all do (both guys and girls)

Most Helpful Guy

  • Seems to me like you have had a very traumatizing past with women. For that, I'm very sorry you had to go through any of it. I can truly understand how being made to look weak or be in helpless situations can make you feel like less of a man.

    This is something the world doesn't understand. Men are made to be seen as a leader, as a supporter, and a protector. If a man faces a challenge, he's expected to overcome or without any help from anyone else.

    It's not possible for a man to be a victim. That's only something someone weak or a woman can be.

    Again, for that I'm truly sorry.

    BUT...

    Even though those are the beliefs you may have, and even though the world isn't kind to betas, and even though you were traumatized by women in the past, does not... and I mean DOES NOT... give you the right to rule over women.

    Even though society hasn't caught up yet, women are equal to men. In fact, in many cases, women are stronger than men.

    You were not put on this earth to rule over them, or disrespect them, or abuse them. You were put on this earth to show kindness, love, and compassion. To respect women who may one be the vessel that carries your children and help you raise them to be kind and loving.

    If, after reading this, you still feel like you need to rule over your girlfriend, then I truly hope she sees the kind of "man" you are and leaves now before you get the chance to hurt her.

    A real man... and I mean this... a REAL man, shows restraint, and humility. They learn to coexist with their female counterpart and show love and compassion to them as they will to you.

    If you still believe it's your place on this earth to rule over women, then you, sir, need to be removed from this earth because you completely missed the point of life and are a danger to anyone who's around you; both male and female.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Being the head of household was never meant to control a woman. And for her to respect you means you treat her with respect. It doesn't mean she doesn't get input in decisions made for your family or it's your way or the highway.

    There's nothing wrong with wanting a more traditional marriage if that's what she wants too. But don't make the mistake that she is not equal to you by thinking she should do everything you say. The worse thing you could do is use God's testimony to try to control a woman. A real man of God knows her worth and respects her imput just as she respects him for his worth and input.

    I have see a few very healthy marriages that believe the man being head of the household. But I've also seen unhealthy one's. And the way you explain what your plans are seems you are using this in an unhealthy way.

    • I personally have never seen a healthy marriage in which the man was not the head of the household.

  • Don't show it with words but with actions. Become the person you want to be and if you grow apart is means that you're not compatible.
    I understand what you want to say even thought it might sound harsh or crazy.
    Maybe say that you want to have polarity in your relationship, but avoid saying things like "woman has to obey etc".
    Pay attention to who she admires, who she envies, her parent's relationship to understand more about what she wants. If her father is how you want to be, it means that she is used to that. But, check also if she admires her father or thinks he was controlling.
    Have male role models of how you want to be and move away from extremism.

    • That's a good point I should find more delicate words. I imagine it could be scary being dominated so I should use words that are less harsh. She comes from a traditional religious family and her father is a man I respect but he lets his wife get away with things I wouldn't let her get away with sometimes.

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What Girls & Guys Said

12 24
  • If you think you deserve a role in authority just because of your gender, you don't deserve one at all.

  • Oh yeah, like we are going to tell you how to subjugate a woman.

    Enjoy life as a single person.

  • If you actually have authority, then you wouldn't need to make an effort to exert it. Real leaders never have to declare themselves as such.

  • XD XD XD LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

  • *laughs in every language but yours*

  • You just don’t. We all know that sometimes we might let you believe you’re in charge for a few minutes. Just make do with that.

  • When pigs fly

  • join a religion that believes in this you'll find plenty of girls who want it

  • Congratulations on winning a Troll of the day award.

  • Good luck with single life.

  • Weirdo

  • Good luck with that. You can tell her what you want and see if she wants the same thing. I haven't ever tried to exercise authority over my partners, and I've had multiple happy relationships.

  • If you say so.
    Tbh you kinda sound like the weak little guy that gets walked all over by your girlfriend and get on here to feel more masculine

  • think about what you said.
    On one hand you want to be the dominate in the relationship and have her do what you say, but you are afraid she will leave you.
    What does that tell you?
    So, tell her to stay!
    Of course, she is going to leave you, who wouldn't?
    Maybe there are a few women out there that would put up with your crap, but very few.
    A partner is an equal, not someone to be lorded over.
    Good luck being single!

  • You will come off as insecure and weak. Your previous relationships were probably not undermined by failure to exercise “male authority,” but by something like weakness or indecision. If you can lead in a relationship, you won’t need to talk about it and you will also be able to be respectful.

  • this is some high quality bait,
    (please let it be bait)

  • It goes both ways and its a synergy. One way male authority will lead to mental illness, pathology and destruction. That said, modern society could use more masculinity and less gynocracy

  • Hahahaha! Enjoy your future single life.

  • Well I can tell you this I don't believe in the legitimacy of authority so hopefully someone else can help you but I think you're kind of a douche to be honest

  • Either you have a level of authority as a person or you need to work on it.

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