What does he want now that the One night stand is over?

[Anonymous]

I was depressed so I went out to drink at a quiet bar and met a hot guy who was also drinking at the table beside me. He strike a conversation and we started talking. I guess I was too goddamn drunk that my senses were blur. We started kissing then making out and I eventually agreed to go home with him when I was tipsy (on god knows what basis, because I never would do such a dumb thing). We ended up having sex on his bed for hours (and it was my virginity). I guessed it was a moment of weakness because I was depressed. But the next morning I wokeup and I was glad he’s not there so I thought I could make a run for it only to get dressed and went out of the room to find him making breakfast for me. He made me sit down to eat breakfast while he massage my head for any hangover headaches. It was so awkward for me and I didn’t even know what to say to him. End up he offered to drive me home and I had to accept it because I had no cash on me. He asked for my number and sent me to the door. I am still confused at everything. So if there serious opinions and advice to help me with it. Please do if not just fuck off.

[RJJ33666]

I think this guy genuinely wants to go out with you. When you go out for a one night stand, usually both of would realize that and after sex they won't contact each other. But this guy actually wants to know you better, he actually made you breakfast and left you home himself, he might be a good person by heart. You can give him a chance. But if you don't want to be in a relationship with him then you ignore his calls and messages. If he still contacts you personally then tell him directly that you are not interested in being in a relationship.

[Asker]

Okay. But how do I even go about it without feeling awkward.

[RJJ33666]

First of all, you have to make it clear to him that you feel a it awkward, in this way he will know how to act with you at first. Go on a few dates first and Get to know him better and see if he is compatible with you. You might hit it off after a few dates, but If after a few dates you can't get used to him or still feel awkward with him then tell him and just be acquaintances.

[Asker]

Took your advice now we’re dating with marriage in mind😉 Thanks a lot stranger!

[Dargil]

It turned out much better than he could have possibly imagined. He wants more of it. You made him feel loved. Answer the phone or text with yes. I do not believe in love at first sight but WTF do I know. Please don't pursue him. Let him lead with any calls or texts. You never know where this could go. Feels good to me.

[Asker]

Took your advice now we’re dating with marriage in mind😉 Thanks a lot stranger!

[AustinMan]

Do you like the guy when you're both sober, factoring out your shyness and discomfort? Do you want to have sex with him again?

[Asker]

Yes.

[AustinMan]

Then just pursue the relationship. Let him chase you. Better for him to get invested.

[Asker]

He already is the one making the move. I am just weirded out by what I should do

[AustinMan]

You want to date him. So date him. What happened wasn't unusual.

[Asker]

Its weird for me.

[AustinMan]

Put that part on the back burner. Get him as invested as you are and just play out the hand.

[leonidas69]

How are we supposed to know? Ask him

[magiusX26]

sounds like you had an awkward way to meet your new boyfriend

[r0ddy]

Not being insensitive, but looking at your age range... if this is your first time having sex, do you think it's possible that you're viewing a very normal situation as weird? :)

A lot of men have this attitude these days as the whole "hit and run" thing is looked down upon by society, for men. You yourself even stated you would never normally do something like this!

If this doesn't help I'd be interested to know what exactly you need advice regarding in this situation or help about? :)

[Asker]

Im younger than the age I stated. Its just to prevent weirdos from sliding into Dm to send me weird dick pics

[Asker]

I don’t think the situation as weird. ONS are common. Its his behaviour I find weird because most of my gfs who are involved in ONS never had a guy stayed or usually things end that very morning. The guy just doesn’t make breakfast for you or send you home or massage your head. Its an invisible rule. Things just end when you wakeup.

[r0ddy]

Hahahaha bad Reddit experience? 🤣 I wouldn't say he necessarily has feelings, I've done this for girls I've never spoken to again!

[Asker]

Exactly! You don’t speak to the girl again. Not ask for her number and text her asking her if she wants to go watch a movie with you. Like wtf is that...

[Asker]

Like I’m not even sure if I should reply or not because it started out as an ONS. Would I pursue something further. I’m not sure what he thinks of it. He is technically a stranger.

[r0ddy]

I don't necessarily think it is or should be a rule though ! I recently saw someone say the best relationships theyve had have been with strangers as there are no pre dispositions or expectations! You sound confused asf so why not just see where it goes, worst that happens is you're not feeling it?

[Asker]

Maybe because I dont have experience when it comes to boys. I don’t really know what to make of the situation. Like... do I try it out? So if I see him again what do I say to him? Cause we slept together. Do I sleep with him again? Like how?

[r0ddy]

Just ask him for a brutally honest answer as to what he wants from this relationship (it is technically already one... don't mean it like THAT) you don't have to sleep with him, he should make you want that if that's what he wants! If you don't feel that when you're sober you're not attracted to him like that! Then YOU pull the plug :)

[Asker]

Okay thanks !

[RemoErdosain]

I agree with this answer. I thought along those lines when I saw your post too: Him making breakfast and treating you right doesn't necessarily mean that he wants anything but sex. Since your relationship started with a one night stand, I'd say that's not a good sign that he really wants anything except getting laid. He might've noticed, or you might've told him, that you were a virgin, and he really liked to be the first one, and also he probably enjoyed those hours of sex. He might want a repeat of the situation. I wouldn't think he's serious about you. There's a chance of that, but I wouldn't count on it

[Asker]

@RemoErdosain I didn’t say I was a virgin. I was sad and he saw me alone sad so he start speaking to me and I shared about my problems. We had a good conversation. I don’t think any of us went to the place thinking to get laid because it’s obviously not a place you find someone to get laid. I could have been friends wit him if not for it happening.

[RemoErdosain]

I'm not saying he went to drink with the idea of getting laid there, but I'm saying how fast everything happened, it sounds to me like he likes casual sex, and this was such another case

[Joe__Exotic]

He was being nice and wants to see you again. I don’t see the confusion.

[Asker]

I just don’t want any string attached if there is no potential to develop anything else. So would like to understand what he could possibly thinks of it.

[Joe__Exotic]

There’s always a potential to develop something else.

[TheAfrikan]

❕ Basically I will not day that it was love. The guy took your Virginity, and happened since your where tipsy drunk and switched off.
It is like he used you like a lap dog. So what you can do is to decide wether you stick with him, If it does not offend you for him taking advantage of you.