What guys want in a woman!

Hi people!

So, I saw this myTake earlier today, and while I have seen many more like this before, this one "straw" definitely broke the camel's back.
What A Girl Wants In A Man

Thus I decided to make a response.

Without further ado,

What guys want in a woman – or more precisely, what they would like if they had similarly high standards to women!

Let's go point by point!

1. Height

We guys like being taller than you, at least by a few inches. So ideally, if you are at 5'4" or below, that's acceptable. You might make it if you are 5'5", IF you are perfect in every other way, and you are into anal.

2. Body

We expect you to be in the healthy BMI range, and to have a bodyfat level between 18% and 23%. Anything below that is just too masculine. Anything above that is just disgusting. Get with the age, girls! If your man can bust his ass at the gym, you have to be in shape too!

Use this chart for reference
Use this chart for reference

3. Face/Head

We want feminine features, full lips, small, cute nose, feminine eyebrows, normal sized forehead, healthy and long hair, and general bodily symmetry. We don't care too much about your haircut, but don't look like a bum, and do not spend too much on hairdressing – we don't want a woman who spends all out money. Also, we expect you to be pretty without makeup, and to never wear makeup, maybe with the exception of eyeliners and lipsticks. The rest is just cheating.

4. Style

You are safe to wear anything that is colorful, sexy, revealing, but not too revealing, fashionable, but not too over the top. We expect you to dress to kill every day, if we see you without a proper dress, we will think you are a boring, grey mouse, and you will probably die alone anyway.
Don't even think about wearing baggy, dark, gloomy clothes – the only excuse to wear dark clothes is if you are goth/scene, in which case, tight is the key – not slutty enough, and we won't even look at you.
Oh, and forget about business apparel and women's suits. If we were looking for a man, we would be browsing Grindr or sipping cocktail in the Blue Oyster.
One more thing. Make it effortless. We don't WANT to think about you trying to look your best for us – you should look that way every day of the week. We want that sweet masquerade, but we don't want to see what's below the surface, the work that you put into dressing up – that's your problem. Be a grown woman, and learn how to dress without needing a pat on the back!

5. Personality

We have hard, stressful lives, we have to prove ourselves in the world every day, so the last thing we want is to have to put up with an annoying hag. Be fun and upbeat, radiate happiness! Dance, Jester, dance! Be our manic pixie dreamgirl. Also, be submissive, and take up as little space as possible. We like to exert our power on someone, so learn to enjoy doing out bidding.

6. Attitude

Smile whenever you get a chance, that should be your default expression. NEVER do the resting bitch face. Learn to control it. Always laugh at our jokes, even if they aren't funny.


7. Facial expression

Always be a bit alluring, but not too assertive – it should always be the man initiating the sex, and the woman receiving it, after all. If you come off as too needy, well, we find that unattractive. And once again, no RBF!

I think that about covers it. well, gals, I hope you now understand what you need to do to get us magnificent beats of nature to sleep with you. So follow this advice unless you want to be an old, crazy cat lady!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I just wanted to write about how anal is unhealthy and it's disgusting to want to hurt your partner this way, but when I read the whole MyTake I realized it's not a serious one xd

    • Well, there are a lot of unhealthy things. If a girl wanted me to go in the backdoor, or offered it, i wouldn't complain, but I understand the risks. I agree, requiring it is scummy, that is why I put it in there.

    • Well, if my boyfriend asked me to do something with him that could cause him hemorrhoids, anal aperture, fecal incontinence and other things, I wouldn't do that. I still see it as bestiality

    • Fair enough. That is why I wouldn't ask.

Most Helpful Guy

  • I love girls who have: short hair, wear t-shirt and sweatpants, quite tall and nice developed toned muscles.

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What Girls & Guys Said

3 1
  • I feel like it's sarcastic that can't be serious XD

  • I'm submissive to a man and it goes outside of sex too... However I hate pain and I don' like roughness in sex... so I'm not a BDSM type of submissive then? I don't know much about this but I like being a man's little quiet lover who is always ready for his love, I don't know if that's good or bad

  • I’m not agreeing or disagreeing

    I will only say you speak for yourself

    Not me

  • Wait what the fuck is that "you might make it if you are 5'5, if you are perfect in every other way, and you are into anal" or "be submissive, laugh at our stupid jokes" bitch I'm the exact opposite. Those articles what girls want in men and what men want in girls are so stupid and stereotypical

    • Have you checked the link at the beginning of the myTake? It's a satire.