What is a good married sex life?

[Anonymous]

My husband has what I would call a lower than average libido. He has incredibly high stamina and it can take him 20-30 minutes to orgasm on some nights which I believe puts him off because he feels like it takes so long and worries about his ability to finish. We’re both in our mid-20’s and the problem is, I feel pressured by society to the point where I’m in constant worry about our relationship. Everywhere I turn people are telling me that as a young couple we should be going at it like bunnies and that’s just not our case. He’s very loving and we do manage to do sexual things (blowjobs, hands, etc.) but not always have sex at least once a week. He says that he loves me and is turned on by me and that our sex life is no one else’s business because there is no “normal”. I constantly blame myself and feel that since we don’t have sex everyday it’s because I’m not attractive enough or there’s something wrong with our relationship or even just something wrong with him. Is this just an old stereotype that all men want is sex? Am i wrong to think that there’s something wrong with me if he isn’t constantly wanting to have sex? Do I just need to trust my man? I’m so lost...

[PrudentGuy]

The opinions before me are good so I'll try not to repeat. Other suggestions:

1) make full use of the lockdown - change your intimate time from night to day.

Talk to him and start having sex in the morning and afternoon; perhaps even all over the house 😄. Start a nude lifestyle, where you and him cannot wear clothes when in the house (curtains!!!) or there will be a penalty.

Yes get creative just to spice up your libido.

2) have more non-sexual times together. Cook and bake together; more meal and tea times; no screens only talk for minimum an hour each.

You will be surprise that these sessions increase libido.

3) write erotica and "how to" then exchange for reading.

This will allow each of you to express your sexuality and understand the other.

Then try to fulfill the dominant sexual imaginary there.

4) while medication may cause libido to decrease, aphrodisiac may increase it. So intentionally add them to your menu, including "tongkat ali" tea.

Finally, don't worry. There are many factors to lower libido.

[AustinMan]

Oh, sweetheart!! Relax. You're right. Your sex life is your business.

Are you open to a few questions, though, that may give me some idea how I might help?

[Asker]

Sure!

[1stranger]

There may be things that keep his head busy other than sex.
Trust your man.
And don't lost!

[Asker]

Don’t lost?

[1stranger]

You said that I'm so lost. I also replied don't lost. I mean that don't overthink and don't worry.

[JustRollTheDice]

After while sex isn't as big of a thing and he's right everyone's sex life is different

[Twalli]

If he's been like this since you started dating and he still chose to marry you then all is good

[loveboye]

Talk to him about this tell him hhow you feel and know wha he feel and work on it mutually

[Asker]

I have and he is always very reassuring that he is attracted to me and loves me he just isn’t always “horny”. I still just worry.

[loveboye]

So tell him that you want more sex

[loveboye]

If he really loves you and care for you he will do it and your problem will be solved