What is a safer and smarter way to establish a friends with benefits situation if you don’t want a relationship but still have adult needs?

Question

By safe and smart, I mean knowing the person is STD free and isn’t already in a relationship with someone and hiding your friends with benefits situation, etc.

abc3643 · Accepted Answer

The best way is to get a friend who requires batteries and has an ON/OFF switch.
Otherwise, sometime later, you will come here complaining about Friends With Benefits drama and I will reply with this:

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Congratulations!

Your question is today's Question of the Day illustrating that Friends With Benefits is an illusion because eventually one of them will get emotionally involved as if in a couple.

It's not a question of "if" it's going to happen, but "when".

If it is any consolation, in December 1988 just before I turned 26, I was involved in this intense 2.5 week F W B situation (*) with my roommate. I was very emotionally involved, but, for her, I was just a convenient lay between more "serious BF"s.

So, was I a stupid fool? Yes and no. I knew better, but I wanted what I got into and paid the price. I learned through The School of Hard Knocks just like you are...

(*) This is long before "Friends With Benefits" became "a thing". No one said that 30+ years ago let alone thought it because it would be considered an embarrassment to sink to that level. Apparently, being a slut or manwhore doesn't matter in today's "hook-up culture".

Dargil · Accepted Answer

Lots of moving parts. You or he has to want and find a candidate.
Then someone says: "How about we get together for coffee and talk a bit."
"Talk about what?" "Getting together :-D "
If your situation looks promising, your next get together is going to a storefront lab testing place and mutually getting tested. Then if you get good results, you're off and running.

pajamasam · Answer

Find out if you both find each other attractive. If you both find each other attractive, then just come out and say it. "I wanna meet you on the weekends for sex without the drama of a relationship"

If they are down they say yes, if not they say no and you can keep being friends.

Bad_Man55 · Answer

I mean just be honest and upfront with what you want

StickStickity13 · Answer

Find a man that is of higher status. Perhaps someone successful that doesn't have much time for a girlfriend and would be interested in something like that.