What's it called?

[Anonymous]

when i want to have sex with just one guy ( not many, just one, but i am afraid of commitment any kind ) but don't wanna get married, neither be in a relationship, neither be one night stand, just fulfill my needs, because I can't fall in love but he to not cheat, only with me doing it ( he to do with me ) and me doing it with him... I can't fall in love so, who wanna have no kids, no married but always have sex... what is it called?

[Punkbuster107]

I believe that is called wanting to purchase a male prostitute, or possibly a male sex slave. It would be incredibly uncommon for a man to agree to having sex with a girl exclusively for the rest of his wife without ever talking to her simply out of his own desire to do so.


I could imagine an exceptionally unusual arrangement where perhaps a guy is married to a woman who is permanently disabled, and she insists on encouraging him to find a long term sex partner who he doesn’t talk to or get emotionally attached to, but it would be very uncommon. I have a hard time believing it would last for long without getting more complicated either. Humans aren’t hardwired that way. Some are monogamous and want companion for life, and some just want to have sex with as many people as possible, but what you’re suggesting leaves no room for a man to succeed at either of those goals. Most men would have to be either paid or coerced to fall into that lifestyle.

[wankiam]

you just want a fuck buddy by the sound of it... casual sex but with someone you know and hopefully trust too

[Asker]

noo... i don't want to be " something ", to remain strangers, not talk or something... because i am too cold for this... i don't trust him either, just wanna se if he ain't got aids...

[wankiam]

well thats why i said fuck buddy and not friends with benefits and as far as trust goes i did mean you could trust he was ''clean'' and not that he would give you his undying love

[Asker]

Yeah... but i would be so jealous if he would talk with other girls... like is he gay or something, can't talk with boys... girls nowadays wants to be married and have so much children, then i will lose him... i have no boys, he have no girls... i mean...

[wankiam]

well im sure that guy exists but it might take a while to find him

[Asker]

i agree with you

[wankiam]

well i wish you luck... sadly my perfect woman moved away

[Asker]

thank you... well... i- don't know how that is when someone leaves you cuz usually, i stay sad really, when i have someone else, i am no more... i'm not into that " love " you know... maybe she'll come back... that's how womens are...

[wankiam]

ah no it was fine, she had to move to follow her work ambitions and i plan to move to another country myself soon so it is what it is... i can be quite cold in that regard too though i prefer to see it as being rational

[Asker]

Yeah, it's better to be realistic... i mean... i lost relationships... but moved on... it is what it is, gotta move on and focus on ourselves... we can't do much, force or something, we can cry but won't solve anything because they may surely not care... we gotta do, what we gotta do.

[wankiam]

indeed...

[Iron_Man]

Friends with Benefits. Which never work

[Tomsta]

Thats called either a friends with benefits or a relationship

[Asker]

afraid of commitment...

[Asker]

i wanna be a loner yk, focusing on my work but have only a man who's down

[Tomsta]

Its common to be scared of commitment. I am as well I suggest counselling Why do you have this fear?

[Asker]

I have no emotions, i never ever fell in love with someone in my life, for example you know that boy alright? I like him... he ignores me... alright, it appears another one, wow... ok he doesn't like me... i want to be at a juice or wine or something, oh wow it doesn't want to come anymore outside with me and talk, it ditched me... then i choosed this way... gonna be a loner but anyway fulfill my need... dont wanna be a hoe, but it's the need, once you begin your sexual life, not always, once 3-5 times a week, or 1 time a week, depends how i can, you know... then focus on my work... i can't have lovers or admirers... i dont know what is love you know, someone can explain it to me but i still dont feel it... i never did.

[Tomsta]

I know exactly what you have. You have either emotional numbness which normally indicitive of past undealt with trauma or you might be aromantic I dont know how easy it is to get therapy or coubselling where you are but id advise perhaps seeing someone Im like you i feel nothing really and i have emotional numbness as well as fear of intmacy as well as a bitnof a commitaphobe

[Asker]

but i have no problem with it, instead with a child and be divorced... i'd like the easy style, i somehow like to be romantic but they always break the atmosphere... i have depression and anxiety ( won't say more ) ... i just dont feel love... im okay with that, i just want the " pleasure ", that's it... if a boy, i say, if a boy makes me women of home, then he must be lucky... without children cuz i don't wanna change diapers and god, i really don't wanna to commit... i want to focus on my work more, how could i work if i am married and he to get that one dollar... no... only sex and bye

[Asker]

you know, thats how it is

[Tomsta]

Nothing wrong with being career driven. If thats what you want to do then go ahead. Just saying that based on what youve mentioned thus far there might be some unresolved trauma which you aren't dealing with and trust me when i say kicking the can down the road is only a short term fix I also have anxiety and depression so dont worry. I know

[Asker]

I had trauma when i was in school, i was marginalized. And when boys broke up with me i was sad cuz i had no one... dont wanna be a hoe tho, just have only a man that have path as well, if he... gets in one knee and asks me... won't happen. Seriously... some people aren't made for it, i'm fine. And i am okay with that.

[Asker]

I realized i didn't loved them.

[Tomsta]

No need to justify it to me. If thats what you want then go for it A lot of guys are happy being a friends with benefits. Just make sure younset out ground rules upon entering the 'relationship'

[Asker]

thanks, just tryna find someone like me and just know what's this called, like he not to talk with girls and me not with boys, I don't know how to explain, cuz some of them are dumb.

[Asker]

It is more complicated.

[Tomsta]

I get it. You find most people you come across boring or dull (or even dumb). You dont feel ready for a relationship but you dont want to miss out on boinking someone

[Asker]

Is it a man okay to say that your breath stinks ( washed your teeth ) and that you are crazy... damn... never ever NEVER gonna be in a relationship again it was recently, like shit no

[Asker]

I anyway dont have emotions but like seriously damn

[Tomsta]

That last comment made no sense to me explain

[Asker]

🤦🏼‍♀️

[Anonymous]

Friends with benefits?

[Asker]

no... too complicated... i don't want to think that he's my friend... i'm not into that... i can't commit... i only want to " do it ", not going outside or something...

[Opinion Owner]

Fuckbuddy?

[Asker]

Uhhhh... it sounds too " friendly and approachable ", i do not have emotions or something, never did in my last relationships... when i " did it "...

[Opinion Owner]

Casual sex no strings attached! No love whatsoever just casual sex

[Asker]

Yes but i am jealous if he talks with other girls... they're so desperate to be married and have children, they steal even the ugly ones, everyone, just to be married and ugh... like i just want someone ( cuz yk i don't wanna be a hoe ), to have just sex, ( he needs it or me, give it a call when we can ) and there is it, yk.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah I get u atm I’m in the same sitch as u. I wanna just be casual with no commitment

[Asker]

Yep, no children or something, i don't wanna change diapers not even be a hoe... like, live my life, i had no childhood and now i think neither teenage thing? i just wanna be on vacations, clubs perhaps and drink something ( not do nasty stuff ) living life alright and just have a man when he's down...

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah that’s pretty much the lifestyle I want to! I do hope u find what ur looking for :)

[Asker]

People are just desperate for children, whatever they want but i just want that peaceful lifestyle... it didn't worked with relationships, one night stand, or friends with benefits? neither... i just wanted to know what's called this... thank you, same to you...

[Opinion Owner]

No worries ahaha I hope u enjoy your life no stress

[Asker]

If i had no stress, i wouldn't be on this app lmao... i searched on the internet yk, found nothing, i was like, what i want, does it exist? is it a name? because when i find a boy, i want to explain that to him... ugh... same...

[Opinion Owner]

Ahaha your in a tough sitch