What would you do if you found out that your wife cheated on you, and your son or daughter was not yours?

[Anonymous]

So, here is the story.. My wife of 10 years, had a car accident recently. Destroyed my car, landed her in the hospital, multiple injuries. Her sister at this time came and talked to me about the situation.

she was on her way home from someone who I thought was only a friend, where she was actually getting drunk and cheating. She drove drunk home, and that's when she had the wreck.

I hired a PI to dig into it further, and found out that not only was she cheating on me, but since the day after our wedding, she has slept with over 500 men.. I found text messages, videos, pictures. Everything. I was scared that my son was not mine, so I had a test done. His DNA does not match my own. When I found all of this out I drove to her parents home and explained things to them, that they would need to take care of their daughter during her recovery

. A few days later I confronted her with the info I had dug up. I asked her to explain it. She cried. She was so sorry (bullshit). She explain that it was all true, that she only slept with men 3 times then blocked and moved on to the next guy. She said she only did it because she wanted to feel young and free of responsibility. She says she still loves me with all her heart. Bullshit again.

So far I have filed papers to have my name removed from my son's birth certificate.

All I feel is unbridled rage. Not only has he cheated, it was unprotected, which means she exposed me to other guys ball sweat, cum and other bodily fluids. It doesn't matter how much she showered or cleaned up, that shit sticks around for a while. Doc says I don't have any std's, but it still leaves me feeling sick. I don't do causal sex. And she exposed me to it. Filthy, disgusting. Any respect I ever had for her is gone, any love, any attraction. I should be taking care of her, helping her after the wreck, but I can't bring my self to do it.

What should I do.. Divorce is already in the works too.

[Jessica405]

First, don't lose heart. You were unlucky to have picked a bad one. There are good ones about. The hardest thing to do is sort the good from the bad.

All I can say is you are now doing the right thing. No forgiveness. No going back. Let her family look after her and HER son.

I hope you are ok at the end of this sad saga! Good luck. Take care. Stay safe.

[Asker]

Thank you!

[Jessica405]

No worries!

[Kreneman]

I am sorry to hear that bro and thank God you did not catch any disease. You did the right thing by filing the papers for divorce and always remember, you were not the problem, so don't ever blame yourself. Your soon to be Ex-wife has a lust issue problem that have existed for a long time and she needs professional help asap. I know the child is not yours and if you decides not to be in the boys life, your not in the wrong at all because your not his biological father which was the Ex-wife fault plus you did the right thing by telling her parents. You deserve better, move on, and take the time to heal.

[Kaamraj]

She can't love you and have sex with someone else, she's enjoying her life at your expense and having you raise another man's child. File for divorce, and get your name removed from her child's birth certificate to not have to pay child support.

[elizamichale1]

Aww i m so sorry to know this honey n i would definitely call it cheating.. she must hav told u weigh before wht she wanted...
But honey i can still believe that she loves u with all her heart... if u can somehow accept that just be with her n if not then yes seperating from her is best thing for u but remember it will also keep u in trauma n depression honey...
I also sleep around with many but i only love my husband n thts true love for him

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

I'd probably do almost everything you are doing except the birth certificate thing. You may not be biologically related but you are his father and the only one he has ever known. Why punish him by losing his dad for his mom's transgressions? That seems excessively cruel to do to an innocent kid.

[Asker]

Morally you might be correct, legally you are not. He is less than a year old. So he won't even know me.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Completely up to you, but ask yourself if you are willing to give him up that easy then how much did you really love him to begin with? It's not an easy situation and legal or not I get the anger, but to me that part of it hurts the most.

[Jessica405]

It is better in the long run that he does NOT grow up with multiple men in his life.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

@Jessica405 The mother is already making that decision to have multiple men in their lives, why not have at least one who actually cares for the kid and will help raise it right?

[Jessica405]

That means he may need to have contact with the kid's mother. Again, NOT a good idea. Besides, these "other" men are not actually in the kid's life. They are behind closed doors.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

@Jessica405 Only because she was trying to hide it, now that she isn't needing to, who knows what happens. Ultimately I think we will need to agree to disagree on this one, but I get where you are coming from.

[Jessica405]

There is one other thought. How would a future partner feel about the kid being in his life? An unknown factor.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

@Jessica405 What if they never get a DNA test done and 18 years from now he is married with a family and this boy shows up at his door asking if he is the father? Lot of what ifs in that scenario.

[Jessica405]

He can turn round and tell the truth. No, I am not your father.

[OlderAndWiser]

It souds like you are already doing what you need to do. My only caution is to be more concerned with the 10 year old boy's feelings; yu are an adult and he is not (and he is another innocent party!)

[Asker]

We have been together 10 years.. Our son is under a year old. We originally had trouble conceiving, which might have been on me now that i look back on it.

[RobT312]

What a horrible story and experience. If the reality of your relationship and family is beyond repair then I would do as you are doing. It’s never too late to make a change and live the life you want

[Berethor]

You didn't shoot that whore yet?

[RagnarRedbeard]

I’d do exactly what you’re doing.

[Nkyshemera]

I'm so sorry you experienced this. If it had happened to me, I would have cut off all communication with her and divorced. Also, after the accident, her family or other lovers can help, she has already saved enough lovers to help her...

[Wade12345]

This story sounds like someone I know. He caught his wife of 10 years in bed with another man.

[Asker]

Ouch

[SiberFox]

I can say on this website what I would do. But there was a time when such things were punished on the public square.

[andreasderjuengere]

No mercy to that imitation of a wife.

The son: well until now you were accepting him as your ''real'' son. I assume that you have bonded, shared time together and had contributed raising him.

I see no immediate reason to now abandon him or to punish him for something that he can't be held responsible for.

[Keepitreal007]

Well divorce yes but hold the horses in the kid. He’s innocent and if he believes your his dad then keep it that way. Don’t be a dick to him for something your bitch did.

[vald9inches]

You should help her out after the wreck or else you would never forgive yourself. Two wrongs don't make a right! You are still her husband and she is still your wife!! Maybe this is why she couldn't be honest with you and communicate her needs with you because you would react this way. If she didn't feel she couldnt trust you to tell you any of this from day one that means there is a huge trust and communication issue in your marriage! I can promise you even if you get divorced and marry another woman and you still fail at communicating and building trust it will only happen again

[Asker]

I'm sorry her parents can help her. I will not be a door mat.

[vald9inches]

Its not about being a doormat its about not being a shitty human being! Would rather she had died in the crash really? Even if it is not your biological son he is still your son and that is still his mother! This will impact his life too! I understand you are hurt but you need to think about how this will effect other people too

[Asker]

Dude she stopped being my wife when she broke my vows. No I don't want her to die and for you to assume I want that shows what kind of shitty person you are. I just don't want anything more to do with her. She broke her vows, end of story end of discussion. And her son is less than a year old...

[vald9inches]

Well if you don't want her you have to show it by helping her out after the crash fool!

[vald9inches]

Its your choice in the end but just remember everything i said

[Asker]

What you said is very incorrect.. Very..

[RuthlessAggression]

did you know that the old testament doesn't say a single word about if a married man is allowed to cheat or not, but, if a woman cheats on her husband, she's going to hell

[Asker]

Yeah part of why i dont believe in the bible. Its a great work of fiction no more no less. Cheaters regardless of gender are trash.

[KrakenAttackin]

You can't turn a hoe into a house wife. What you can do is get ready to pay alimony and child support.

[Asker]

This is an at fault divorce state. Which means cheating, to the degree that she did, would kill off any alimony she would get, as to child support, once my name is off of the birth certificate, that's on her to figure out too. I know in other states it's different, but this isn't a mommy state.

[KrakenAttackin]

Asker. What state is that?

[Asker]

It's in the Midwest, that's as close as I'm willing to go with telling you where I'm at.

[Zolly99999]

Divorce her, and sue her for mental and emotional distress and pain and suffering..

But I wouldn't abandon the child you raised.. it's not their fault.

[Waldoe]

She is obviously suffering from a mental disorder, it is sad and I am sorry. Normal people do not behave this way. I do not blame you for being angry, I would be too.
So you have options,
leave... very hard because the children Love you, and I am sure you Love them, they only know you as "Dad"
or stay... and get her into mental health counseling, sleep in sepparate bedrooms and Pray for her recovery

[Jouth]

maybe have consentual sex with her daughter as revenge

[Anonymous]

I've heard of that happening, and what a train wreck that would be.