When you are in a relationship, do you feel entitled to sex from your partner?

Question

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

Yes, of course - and every woman I've ever been in a relationship had the same feelings of entitlement about getting sex from me.

In early January, I had been planning a dinner date with my girl for a couple of weeks, but I ended up having to be up really early the following day as I had to pick up my parents from the airport. I told her that we could only spend about 3 hours together because I couldn't stay out late as I usually do, so I told her that we'd just go out and have dinner. She was NOT happy - she thought I was insisting on the dinner out, which would have meant skipping sex, and she was both crying and angry, and she felt cheated.

I told her that I had promised her a nice dinner out, and didn't want to disappoint her, but it seems that she didn't care about going out to dinner - she wanted close and personal time with me instead. She ended up cooking up a quick meal and we spent most of that 3 hours in the bedroom. Believe me, she felt every bit entitled to sex as I ever have. If our schedules allowed, it would be every day, but she has a rotating shift so we only see each other twice a week on most weeks. She doesn't like to miss her days...

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Accepted Answer

No, and I'm a man

Adaeva · Accepted Answer

Societies evolve and change. Prior to the 1970s, marital rape, or the raping of one spouse by the other, was exempt from many rape laws. In 1976, however, Nebraska became the first state to make marital rape a crime. By 1993, marital rape was a crime in all 50 states. Therefore, what may have been an entitlement in the early 1970s is now a crime. Nevertheless, if a young persons marries he or she will feel entitled to sex and, if denied, likely the marriage will not survive. In effect, a young married person is either entitled to sex or is else entitled to a divorce.

Apple1996 · Accepted Answer

Nah me and my partner just have sex when we both feel like it.  And ew the amount of men that voted yes to this is fucking disturbing 😳

caring__1 · Answer

One of the main problems in relationships is when either person feels entitled to anything. A sense of entitlement implies they are more worthy, and the other person's feelings are irrelevant. There are ways to be considerate yet still influence the other, but demanding anything shows a disconnect from the relationship and disrespect of the partner. I understand a lot of people masturbate on their partner's body, just using them for their own pleasure, but that's not what a relationship is all about. A healthy relationship prioritizes a special connection between two people, where each truly cares how their choices impact their partner. The main reason people seek quantity is they have no idea how to get quality. Quality lingers over time, whereas quantity is gone as soon as the action stops. When we take the time to help our partner feel safe, secure and special, the vulnerability that ensues leads to greater depth, meaning and connection. When our partner feels safe enough to freely share his or her experience with us, that is the greatest pleasure we could ever dream of. When we just focus on our own pleasure, we're left empty and insatiable.

There are many ways to connect, and not all are physical. I understand how great physical intimacy feels, but it's the emotional intimacy that ensures a relationship will thrive. Savor the connection rather than the performance, and you'll be happier and more fulfilled in the long run.

Roxxy99 · Answer

Yes. Isn’t there an expectation of sex within any relationship? I don’t mean entitled to it at any time or place of one’s choosing but in a general sense. I think I’m entitled to sex from my significant other and he from me within reasonable limits.

Account · Answer

The results of this poll make me lose hope in humanity even more. The answer is no. I never feel entitled to anything concerning another person's body.

DaveJord · Answer

Depends on what you mean by relationships... I mean if we are talking about a committed relationship and we are in the process of doing that then yes, I expect it at some point. Entitled to sex, that word entitled is a strong word. I guess if we are in an intimate relationship, yes, I feel entitled to a certain level of intimacy. Absolutely.

But if we are just talking about going out together on date or something then no I do not expect sex at all.

Emiliamazing · Answer

No reason to feel entitled. They are going to be times when he's not in the mood and there are times when I'm not in the mood. The best sex is when you both actively pursue it or want it :-)

CopperStove · Answer

I don’t think anyone is entitled to sex from anyone except from an escort and that’s presuming they don’t refund your money. If that’s something one goes for. I do think that if a relationship turns sexless it’s a bad sign and you should want to be sexually active with your partner if everything is going well. Exceptions made for religions or personal choice of chastity or abstinence of course. But that has its own dynamic.

Mmmariaxc · Answer

I said yes but what I really mean is if you aren’t into me we aren’t in a relationship lol if he’s just sick or something that’s different.

VIVANT · Answer

No I don’t. I don’t feel “entitled” to anything in a relationship. There are things I require in order to make a relationship make sense for me—honesty respect affection— where if those things aren’t there it won’t work out, but I don’t feel entitled.

I also don’t really care about sex. It’s not that I don’t feel attraction, I’m just turned off by how much inordinate attention sex gets in place of what I see as genuine connection curiosity compassion respect intimacy etc.. . honestly to me the imbalance is kinda gross.

Most people care tremendously about sex, so I don’t really care too much about dating. If I meet someone for whom sex isn’t the pinnacle of existence - without going to the other extreme of shutting themselves off from any kind of warmth whatsoever- that’s cool, otherwise, meh 🤷🏻‍♀️

Lliam · Answer

If we are in a relationship, we are entitled to sex with each other. None of this wait until marriage bullshit.

But sex needs to be consensual. You can't just force it on someone whenever you feel like it. So, in that sense, nobody is entitled.

I need a partner who loves sex. She craves physical touch, kissing, foreplay, oral and fucking. She should be willing to let me enjoy her pussy for a quicky on occasion. Even if she isn't going to have an orgasm, her pussy still functions, she enjoys the feeling of a cock thrusting, and she loves making me happy.
If her pussy is temporarily out of order, she has a mouth and loves sucking and swallowing.

The roles can be reversed. If I'm flagging for some reason, there are other ways for me to satisfy her needs.

The bottom line is, if both people like sex, have plenty of it, and are eager to accommodate each other's needs, there will be no need to demand sex or to feel entitled.

Genie23 · Answer

No, I don't because that'd be ao silly and rather inconsiderate... I mean, sometimes you can be sick or had a rough day or are physically exhausted or going through something (for example, depressed) ... If the partner still expects you to have sex even if you're sick/exhausted/not in the mood, that shows that person's immaturity.

Red-Blaze · Answer

No I dont I really dont get why your spliting it into man and woman when that is already done

ConfusedGinger21 · Answer

100% he is mine

Katie1964 · Answer

Not necessary entitled but I can get it pretty much any time I want from him.

whirled_up_girl · Answer

No, but I would hope the two of would discuss what’s going to work for both of us early in the relationship.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

When I am in a relationship, my expectation is that our relationship will include sex, and that my partner will want to satisfy me just as I want to satisfy her. But if she does not want to have sex, I don't expect her to just let me use her body. . . and that wouldn't be very satisfying, anyway. f there are occasions when she doesn't want to have sex, I just wait. But if I find myself waiting most of the time, I will reevaluate of this is the right partner for me, because sex is an expectation that I - and most other people - have when we are in an exclusive relationship.

Anemone978 · Answer

Not really? Like, I never raped my ex lol, I always asked him did he want to have sex.. I never just had sex with him... sure I have touched him and tried to make him horny but if he didn't want it he would just slap my hand away... but the fact he rejected me on multiple occasions really pissed me off.. soooo many rejections... soon turns into resentment...

lightbulb27 · Answer

No I think that's the wrong energy, eventhough the Bible kinda says that... its now how I read it.  I think you should stay in pursuit of your mate, not take for granted you have possession of them.

godfatherfan · Answer

If you mean "I get sex anytime I want it, every time I want it", then no. But sex is very important in a relationship. So there absolutely is an expectation that there will be sex.

TonyV · Answer

Yeah, that's kind of the biggest point of a relationship, otherwise it would have to be an open relationship which sounds offal. Why would I want to go through the trouble of esentually dating strangers and being committed to someone who's abstinence?

No I know I can't just take it but if I'm not getting any why would I stay in the relationship? The partner dosent have to give it up but the other partner dosent have to put up with it either.

Sun_Kim-Ai · Answer

Not at all, to be honest.

That said, I did have some partners that thought sex was owed to them. I understand that sex for almost everyone is a need, but if you have to force it out from your partner it's a problem.

My wife could get a bit like this a couple of years ago when I was going through a very rough patch, but it was because I was pushing her away. Once we worked on the issues, we found a balance.

420Rachel · Answer

I wouldn’t say entitled, expected though maybe?

Wish4UrB00ty · Answer

I’m afraid I did more when I was in a relationship. I didn’t really think about it honestly but I was always just pushing her to try it and hoping I would turn her on. I know she thought I thought I was entitled.

SnowedIn · Answer

Nope.

coachTanthony · Answer

No but you sure as hell expect it because it's part of the relationship. Now how much you have sex is between the two of you so please have that conversation.

Paul_in_Indy · Answer

Most of the answers to this seem to assume that “entitled to sex” means that you can demand it at any moment. That’s certainly unrealistic —and wanting that is insensitive. However, if you consider yourself my “partner’… Then, yes, I believe I am entitled to sex. Not sex whenever I want it. Not sex however I want it. But that has to be a thing that I can ask for that you don’t think it’s an unreasonable demands and then, yes, I believe I am entitled to sex. Not sex whenever I want it. Not sex however I want it. But that has to be a thing that I can ask for that you don’t I think is an unreasonable demand and that we expect to be doing with each other.

KittyKat90210 · Answer

It's assumed that there will be sex, at least at some point, but I don't feel entitled to it. It really depends on how the relationship develops and grows. It should be a mutual feeling and understanding, not a matter of being entitled to it

OfMiceandMen · Answer

I don't feel entitled to anything in life and that goes for sex. Sex is a bonus feature not a privilege. Her attention and love should be enough.

Finchie40 · Answer

Not entitled but definitely need to feel appreciated and respected and not one sided

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

It’s no different than any other expectation in a committed relationship.

slatyb · Answer

Entitled? No, but if she regularly refused she wouldn't be my partner.

CubsterShura · Answer

Only when it is agreed upon.

Sixgunsound · Answer

Every letter in the word entitled has a tripwire connected to explosives. I'll pass thanks.

Bricealan · Answer

complicated question and answers. From my POV now, at this place in my life, I think/feel deferentially than at 20'something. Really young guys think "yes", but the reality is that sex is not and should not be a requirement for a 'relationship.

AviatorTom · Answer

In a serious male-female relationship, each of us expect to share sex with our partner, "entitled" is not the right feeling.

Jdjfjcjj · Answer

If you a guy and are not getting consistent sex from your girlfriend, leave her. Don't beg for sex. She has her right to refuse, you have your right to get your d*$k wet elsewhere

RavVid · Answer

because you want a lot from me and I want sex in return for your shit!

goaded · Answer

Entitled? No. But prolonged abstinence does not make the heart grow fonder.

Fireguy17 · Answer

sex happens as a by product of a good healthy relationship.
At first it is because you are horney.
But to simply expect sex at any given time is not right.
Your partner may be tired, not feel well, or a bazillion other reasons.
You keep doing that they will grow to resent you for demanding sex all the time.

suzzieQ · Answer

No one is entitled to sex at all period

worldscolide · Answer

No, especially if I'm sick or she is sick..

AsaKyo · Answer

I shouldn't feel entitled to it and neither should he lmao

DudeDiligence · Answer

I don't feel anymore entitled to sex than she should feel entitled to me staying in a relationship with her.

UncleBilll · Answer

If we're not having sex then what's the point

Luopio27 · Answer

Relationship does not obligate anyone for sex.

Date_a_Snob · Answer

My boyfriend works a dangerous job as a firefighter so while I may not always be in the mood I never say no when he asks

Jamie05rhs · Answer

No; of course not.

kellytheman · Answer

I don't think if your in a relationship no one is entitled to have sex unless your in a committed or marriage relationship. It healthy for a relationship in my opinion but no one is entitled to it.

Zayed_ · Answer

I’m a virgin but If I was Married It would be a human right.

NostalgiaSenpi · Answer

If I were, I would not.

Likes2drive · Answer

Entitled is not actually a word I would use, more like we would figure we would get it usually if in a relationship, women like to have sex too believe it or not

AimeeKyle · Answer

I answered A…. although entitled seems a bit strong. I would say as long as I am doing my part in the relationship / putting forth effort, she should be able to do the same.

MadAndBankrupt · Answer

In a relationship, No. marriage, yes!

pervgirl · Answer

That's his job... if I want to fuck he better get busy

Twalli · Answer

I'm not technically entitled to anything. I expect that she'll love and respect me enough not to cheat. I hope (more than expect) that she wants to have sex with me as often as I want to have sex with her. I expect her to break up with me instead of cheating if she feels that our relationship cannot move beyond where it is.