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Who is really to blame?

Who is really to blame?

So I thought I would take some time to talk about something that goes relatively unnoticed today. Victim Blaming. We are so quick to blame the victims, when we should point fingers at the perpetrators.

"Oh she was asking for it!"

"She's a hoe, she got what she deserved"

"She dresses like that and thinks guys should respect her"

"Just because they are a victim doesn't mean they are right"

These sayings are thrown around way to much everyday. We blame girls for wearing shorts in schools because it distracts boys, but we never tell boys to stop objectifying women. We teach girls they should always check their drinks at parties but never tell boys not to put drugs in girls drinks. We teach girls that they should protect themselves against rapists, but boys are never taught not to attack girls. Sure girls should be more careful, but why do boys not receive the same treatment?

The whole idea of blaming the victim has to stop. We don't blame murder victims for getting murdered, so why are girls blamed for being raped? Next time a case comes up when a girl is raped, think about what you say before you blame the victim. No matter what she was wearing, she did not deserve to be raped and no man has the right to do so.

Please share or at least read because this is an important issue that should be spread around. We need education and the world can actually become a better place!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Locking our cars, locking our stuff with passwords, preaching to the choir.

    Rape has an emotional toll that not one of those things have. I get it we love our cars. Hey I love my car, in fact Im one of the only girls out there that can talk to you about any F1 race from 94. Yeah, the year Senna died. But it cannot be compared to a car being stolen.

    The day you get raped you feel like someone took the most precious thing you owned. Dignity. Pureness. Courage. You feel dirty. You feel like you dont deserve to be happy anymore. You feel like you didn't fight when you were in shock. You feel like its your fault when it was someone elses. You feel like you'll never smile again but you have to every day. You want no one to know because theyll think less of you. So you walk around streets, you walk around halls, you walk around work, school, your own house pretending to be happy. This is when you realize that fake it till you make it doesn't work, and the whole scientific thing about smiling making you feel happy is purely hypothetical. The worst part is when everybody believes you. You feel like the people who once knew you never did. How can't they see? How can't they see the incredible dark cloud surrounding you? Are you that good at lying?

    You feel detached from everything. You feel like love will never find you because itll think differently of you if you tell and if you dont they dont know you. Meaning its not love at all.

    We are not preaching to the choir. We are making a point because to some of us it has happened. It needs to stop. 1 out 4 women get raped. 4. Your mother, sister, cousin and girlfriend. Thats four.

    Truth is. We shouldn't have to lock our cars, or put passwords on everything.

    But dont compare that to rape. Rape should never happen because it takes a lot more than your car.

    And yes. People say it was our fault all the time. Spoken from a girl who wears sweaters in summer.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You know what, I'm sick of this bullshit. Yes, rape is wrong. It's a crime. It's the second worse thing you can do to someone. EVERYONE KNOWS. It's not in me, & the majority of men. Good, decent men would love to take every rapist there is & lock them away, or kill them. Feminist: You're preaching to the choir. We know.

    We hate it too. & if you'd take 2 damn seconds to think beyond your vaginas, you'd realize men deal with the shit too. Oh, that's right: Men's issues=Not Women's Problems, but Women's issues=Everyone's problem. Yeah, we got that too.

    You don't like to be judged for what you wear, what you look like, or aspects pertaining to your body. Guess what: We Don't Fucking Either. But since you'll continue to judge us, expect to get judged. Stop being so fucking hypocritical. It's life. People are judgmental. And, honestly, if you're walking out the house in a "I'm hot as fuck" dress, you're going to get attention, in various forms. And if you're trying to tell men dressing as such is not for attention, You Are A Liar. For Fuck Sake's, be honest about it. Is there anything wrong with that? Does that mean you'd be "asking for it?" No & Fuck No.

    Men are taking a lot of shit for what a minority of asshats, doucheclowns, & ubercreeps are doing. We bust are fucking asses trying to protect & understand you, WHILE dealing with hypocritical feminist YOU let represent you.

    We know you just want to feel safe. So do we. I'm fed up with the double standards. I don't need a morality check. I need crazy, bullshit feminist, who think I'm the bad guy just because I have a dick, to calm their shit.

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 15

  • I don't condone "rape"... but I think you need to realize that there is a double standard for men in society. There are hardships on both sides of the gender pole. If a guy commits a crime that is considered taboo in society, most of the time they will receive a harsher punishment than a woman. A lot of females don't understand this and are under the impression that "guys" can get away with anything.

    Women "want" gender equality but the fact is they will always need a man to protect them from other bad men. There will never be equality because we are both different. Too different to be the same.

  • I'd like to point out what happen to Dr Matt Taylor. Many leading feminists were blaming him, and say he deserved what happened to him because of what he was wearing. Thanks girls (some not all) for ruining a monumental achievement in human history with your hypocrisy

  • are you fucking kidding me? I've seen girls walking into the club with nothing but pasties. and sure they might not be asking to be raped but they're sure as hell asking to be touched. i mean its not like they're out dressed like that NOT to get into some kind of sexual situation and if they are then its all for attention and you shouldn't respect them or their boundaries anyway. sure they have a choice who they go home with, but that doesn't mean they get to deny that that they're sending the message that they're sending.

    In the words of dave chappelle,
    "excuse me, i am NOT A WHORE"
    "Yes ma'am, but you are wearing a whores uniform and you gotta see how that shit is confusing as fuck"

  • My mother taught me and my 2 brothers to be respectful to women, to not take advantage of them and to never harm them, emotionally, or physically

    This take is based heavily on generalizations, and i feel like its almost an attack on men,
    "We don't blame murder victims for getting murdered..."- this statement right here is a very false generalization, an example of this is Trayvon Martin many people blamed him for his own death

  • I think victim blaming is noticed more than you realize, but it doesn't make it any less disgusting.

  • You lock your house and car.
    Have passwords on many things.
    You get the idea.

    Rape, etc. is never the victim's fault and the Good Book indicates that we are never responsible for the sins of others.

    But the victim can be stupid and unknowingly invite trouble. Lawyers call it contributory negligence. Taylor Swift walking around in a nightie in South Central LA is not inviting rape but she is negligently availing herself to it.

  • No man should ever force himself on a woman that's a given. Women shouldn't lead a man on if she's no intention of sleeping with him though. men don't have a dick attached. Dicks have men attached. It's in control. You shouldn't tease it.

  • The thing is I've never actually heard a guy say a girl was asking for it based on what she was wearing. Now, I've heard them say that what she was wearing probably made her "the bait", but never that she was asking for it.

    • Apparently, the only people reading encyclopedia dramatica were me and under aged girls who didn't get that it's a joke and not an actual reference.

  • spare me your lectures... Preach all you want to actual rapists... Rape is a crime... Boo.. bad... Victims never ask for it... But if someone drives his lamborghini to the ghetto and not lock it up, he cannot expect that no one would try to steal it

  • erm... i don't think any reasoned/normal-minded person would say different..

    • Dear God!!! DO you even speak English brother? just a simple 'resonable' would have done

    • yes, I do... which is why my reply was largely in Standard English (bar erm... and not using capitals).

  • If I decided I wanted to wear my gold watch and gold chain in the hood, I'm not asking to get robbed but I'm making myself a target. Fundamentally it's no different.

  • Another feminazi with a shitty take...

    Like what? you think men raped girls because they didn't knew it was bad?

    Like, if I tell a rapist: hey sir, rape is bad, you should stop it!

    Do you think he will answer: OMG man, I totally didn't knew that, im so sorry, have a nice day''

    No, they do it because they want it.

    Its like if I go in front of the bloods ( a streetgang) and im wearing all blue clothes and scream: praise the crisp! our heroes!

    I would get shot. They would commit a crime, but I didn't help myself

  • You know when I don't want to get robbed, I don't flash my money. It is still a crime when it happens but I would be stupid to do it and think that my risk hasn't gone up for being robbed.

    Legally I can pin $100 all over my jacket and walk around all night but that doesn't make it smart -- just arrogant, self righteous and stupid.

  • Men are taught not to rape. Which is the vast majority of men do no such thing. Criminals tend to ignore laws, not good men. So why the fuck are we being lectured?

    And here's some reality for you: most men are afraid to ask women out because they have it drilled in their head that today, even saying hello is sexual assault.

    So stop fucking lecturing people who don't need lectured. If you want to lecture the perpetrators, go to a fucking prison and lecture there. Spare everyone else yet another serving of male demonizing and shaming.

  • While it's true that a girl wearing nothing isn't asking to be raped she is not blameless in the situation. If I walk down the street with a clothing made purely off 100$ bills and I got robbed people would tell me I was asking for it while that's not true I didn't take the proper precautions in order to keep myself safe if you're a girl and you're at a party and you get black out drunk while you're wearing slutty clothes there is a decent likely hood you might get raped if you're black out drunk wearing modest clothing you probably won't get raped so while it's unfortunate that this is how it is you should take proper precautions to prevent yourself from being in a bad situation you're more likely to get raped if you're wearing slutty clothes or your super drunk so don't get super drunk and don't wear all the slut clothing.

    • Even if that is true. That shouldn't be the case. A girl shouldn't have to worry if she blackouts that she will be raped because she is wearing revealing clothing

    • The reality is while this shouldn't be the case you are equally responsible because you neglected to take the proper precautions to prevent this from happening while it is unfortunate that you have to take these precautions it's not just true for girls getting raped it's true for wearing expensive jewelery in a bad neighborhood you are responsible to take the necessary precautions to avoid this from happening to you.

    • But even so, your robber will be convicted. Even if a rapist does get caught, even if he does get arrested, he has ridiculously high chance to not even be convicted if he's caught. These 2 really aren't comparable. Cuz they probably will call you stupid for it, but they won't dismiss the case for it. With rape, they will or they won't even give them more than a month in jail.

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