I think you've got to draw a pretty decent distinction in the category of "violent sex". There are men who are rapists and terrible people who get off from forcing themselves on a woman. Those men should be in prison for a long time and never even get close to another woman.
However, there are also plenty of men who aren't like that but just get way too excited during sex and get way carried away/forget how much stronger they area than the woman they're doing it with. However, these men can be reasoned with and will slow down if you communicate to them that they need to do so.
Then there's "rough sex" that's rough enough to be pleasurable but not so rough that it hurts. This isn't something you should be scared of. This is something you should really want because it feels super good!
OK well clearly he has a fetish for more forceful play while having sex it may also be a BDSM fetish. That being said I’m guessing you’re not a fan of the rough stuff like that by what you’re question suggests.
So my question ultimately becomes one of two things first Lee do you know what BDSM is, and how do you feel about his concept of having rough sex? Also have you talk with him about this at all, and if so what did he say?
No i don’t know about it actually, i like my hair being pulled but i don’t know about the other stuff and kind off i felt scared and am afraid it means he doesn’t love me so i don’t know , he was asking for my permission, i didn’t give him an answer yet
So first thing you have to understand about fetishes is that it has very little to do with you beyond the actual physical play itself. It’s somebody’s own individual sexual interest that they may share with a partner or not. To be honest you should really talk to him about how that made you feel, and the dynamics behind his particular fetish. Something to know first off if he loved you from the beginning then he’s probably still going to love you, and still does love you. Second thing you need to know a fetish even a rough one isn’t him trying to be abusive to you some people just like having sex like that which is perfectly fine. Third thing BDSM and/or rough play should always have certain safeties put in like safe words or safe actions in the case were safe words can’t be used.
These words or actions are very specific, and they’re made to be very specific so that way you can communicate to him that you either need a break or that you need him to stop said action/ activity. I totally understand your fear, And where it’s coming from. I totally Get that this is a completely different ballgame for you, and you may just need time to adjust to the reality that your boyfriend has a fetish like that. On the other hand however you should keep in mind that he did ask your permission, and he does want you to feel comfortable enough with him to talk about it with him. To be honest it’s actually super important that you do talk about it with him, and determine the things you do like, and things that you don’t like sexually. You should also determine what things you’re willing to try, and what things you are not.
Very common. You'll find that most men have an interest in that to one degree or another.
I promise you, it does NOT mean anything about his real perspective of you, nor does it mean that he disrespects you. I love my wife very much, and I do it to her as well. Outside of the bedroom, I would move mountains for her. Inside, I dominate her and need to "own" her.
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Some Women Prefers Violent, Aggresive, Dominating Sex. Being Dominated and Pain turns them on (even if they dont admit it, they enjoy unconsciously) because of painful pleasure.
He might be working on that for you.
I was never violent during Sex. I am submissive
Because of the excitement
Does it means he doesn’t respect me?
He has some daddy issues from childhood
What does that mean
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