Why couldn't he stay hard?

[DOTEA]

my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time like a month ago. Weve been dating for almost a year he had never pressured me into sex. he would get hard when I would go down on him (i don't know if I did it good) then he would lose his hardness. It was our first time he was also a virgin. He got me lingerie. He ate me out. We got it in my vagina but he was semi soft. He said he was nervous. But I don't ever hear of other couples having this problem. We didn't try it again, he calls me sexy and always calls me beautiful. does this mean he's not attracted to me? Why couldn't he stay hard? Do you think it was too soon for him? he's a quiet shy guy. But opened up around me. I wasn't even nervous, I was comfortable being naked in front of him.

[SunnySonia]

C'mon! Don't be judgmental the very first time. Every individual is different. So didn't thing they you weren't nervous while he was or he wasn't much hard.

FYI, semi-hard could be due to various reasons, prime being nervousness and performance pressure. May be he already climaxed too early (being the first time) and getting hard again wasn't quick for him. So next time you do, make him relaxed, keep on seducing him by doing some foreplay, whichmay include some seductive dancing or striptease or just teasing him until he gets so charged-up that he forgets everything and just wants you under him (better for first time).
Also, counsel him first that it'd be ok even if he climaxes early or that he doesn't need to be under any performance pressure or something and that you won't judge. Let him concentrate on his satisfaction first.. free mindedly. Also, keep on talking dirty to him throughout (if both of you are comfortable that is) and keep on motivating him by saying he's doing good.. trust me.. once his confidence is built, he'll satisfy you as well.

And don't judge him for his performance and tell him you feel happy to satisfy him. I'm not saying you should not climax, but just that he's nervous and you're not, better keep him motivated.

Taking my example, there are times when I'm hard enough to provide back-to-back 8 climaxes to my wife (after which she can't take more and pushes me out) before climaxing myself, while there are times too when I ejaculate within may be a min because I've already had a built-up since long.

Remember, it's more between your ears (brain) that gives a better climax than what's between legs. So the key is to stimulate the sensuous senses more than the sensuous nerves, if you know what I mean!

Wish you many great sexual experiences with him! 😉

[Aizou]

Not being comfortable, nervousness, stress and other similar factors can all be the cause of this. It's neither yours not his fault. Take it slow, and try again once he's a bit more comfortable. Or in case of it being stress, once he's relaxed a bit.

[DOTEA]

Yeah we did go in a hotel and he's very uncomfortable in my town. I think if we were at his town he would've. But.. like did it have to do with me?

[Aizou]

It's very unlikely that it had anything to do with you, unless you used teeth, but you'd probably know if you did. He were probably just worried about stuff and couldn't relax properly, to enjoy the moment.

[JustaLoozer]

Nervousness can definitely be a boner killer, and it doesn't mean that he doesn't find you attractive, but that he is afraid he won't do well as it is his first time, or any other number of reasons.

I read a study a bit ago on Viagra, and most men take viagra as they are scared they will lose their erecrion (obviously), but the number one reason people lose there erection is they are so focused on losing it, ironically.

[Gramer]

Yes that's true but viagra should be used in older ages, right? :P

[JustaLoozer]

@Gramer Should be, but most times even then it's mind over matter But if it helps, why not?

[Gramer]

I mean sure, it could be used if it helps. But problem is it could make the body get used to it and then the man will be unable to maintain erection naturally?

[JustaLoozer]

@Gramer Perhaps I have not read up on that Some medications are like that and some not; I am unaware of Viagras affect

[Gramer]

Yea true, it's something we don't know for sure. I made an assumption. Have you had any situation like that? The guy couldn't function?

[JustaLoozer]

@Gramer I'm with my first boyfriend, and he's waiting for marraige So no 😅

[Gramer]

Oh okay I understand :) Do you want to follow me btw? :)

[JustaLoozer]

@Gramer Lemme see what questions you've got 🤔

[Soft4u]

It's common for a guy especially a first time to lose his erection due to being nervous, don't overthink what happened bc you're going to take all the blame and it's not you at all. Just wait until you guys get it going, you're going to notice a big difference in him believe me.

[DOTEA]

Okay. Like we are more so comfortable now then we were when it happened. i feel so much closer to him now since it happened. Is that normal?

[Soft4u]

Yeah it's very normal, that's an awesome feeling isn't it, like something you can't really describe. I'm happy for ya!

[Vedika08]

I think first time is a bit awkward for men and they tend to go more nervous which leads to loss of erection. My husband had the same problem first time but then gradually he was fine. Make sure he doesn't watch much porn or masturbate often.

[Drooogie4]

Nerves can very easily cause him to react like that. I very highly doubt its that he isn't excited. Being nervous can just shut everything down

[spartan55]

I can almost guarantee it was nerves that caused him to lose wood. Some women seem to think we can just summon up a hard on at will and it doesn't work like that.

[PrincessGrail]

Tell him not to masturbate for a few days before you do it next time.

[Gramer]

That's the trick you perform with your partners? :P

[PrincessGrail]

@Gramer my partners don’t usually need it. But she said he had trouble staying hard.

[Gramer]

Yes I get it. Do you need to put more effort actually?

[PrincessGrail]

@Gramer in getting the guy hard? Not usually. Sometimes, I guess.

[Gramer]

Yes indeed. Do you want to follow me btw? :)

[FunkyMonkee]

Maybe he's just got too much to think.

[meowmeowgivemefood]

Maybe he was really nervous.

[thebigc]

He might have ed or bust quickly

[DOTEA]

What?

[thebigc]

Erectile dysfunction, failure to maintain an erection until orgasm

[DOTEA]

Ah. okay

[RyanAmaral]

Nervous sounds about right.

[ChildishBrendino]

Yeah, it's nerves, he just needs to relax and be more confident, let him know that you're enjoying what you're doing.

[DOTEA]

Is it possible that he aroused?

[ChildishBrendino]

Don't worry about that, I'm sure he's attracted and aroused, guys can just get nervous about doing something while in the moment

[masterkamasutra]

its his weakness.

[Anonymous]

I bet he had to be the hunter