Sexual Relationships
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Why do lesbians gross me out but gays dont? Am I homophobic?

I mean i know love is love but i can't help how or why i feel so disgusted by lesbians. Um, one time i was at a starbucks and a lesbian couple next to me were being all lovey dovey and kissing and i swear i was about to puke! I get this really instense gross feeling in me when i see lesbian.. Or think of that.. doesn't happen with gays though. I think gay men are mostly funny and cool. So why am i like this? I've been this since i was little and whenever i see a female with short hair i could die of how grossed out
Updates:
+1 y
I dont dehumanize lesbians but i just can't stand this feeling. Its so nasty to me
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I need to know why? I dont really know why i mean its just
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Being grossed out is subconsciously thinking I don't want the image of that happening to me or there's something i consider unclean as in actually associated with some thing that could make you unwell or pose a threat.
    I think sexuality itself could probly be deconstructed into individual elements you like or dislike (dominance , hairiness , bounciness , playfulness , if there seen as compertitect ) but finding it grose suggests you instinctively find the elements and or combination a nasty image to you.
    A simpler example would be I'm grossed out by slugs because i associate them with disease and sharp teeth that i subconsciously link with what i've seen in horror films.
    I also don't particularly like seeing gay guys do things but it's considerably less bad if there not hairy badly formed or fat it's the elements and associations that make it gross and that make us straight , gay or bi being attracted to big breasts , smoky eyes , light brown skin it's these elements mixing.

    You dont like the image of girls together because of the parts of it that make it up maybe seeing girls as competition and pheromones not feeling right and or bounciness really annoys you?

  • I have always traditionally felt as you do, in reverse. Two women getting it on can be hot. The idea of two guys together grossed me out. I think it had to do with me imagining myself in a gay act. I'm not gay at all and the idea was repugnant. On the other hand I could never be homosexual with a woman, or with two women, so that didn't bother me at all.

    Could this be why you feel like you feel?

    After thinking about it a lot over the years, I'm now just ambivalent about two guys. If I see gay guys showing affection in public, it's like, OK, these dudes love each other; it's cool. Still isn't my thing, but live and let live.

Most Helpful Girls

  • It's actually funny you say that. For me it's the exact opposite. (I should state that I am straight though). If we're talking solely in physical, sexual terms here:
    In my eyes, being lesbian is more comprehensible because women (again, in my opinion), in comparison to men, are the considered and seen as the epitome of beauty. Throughout history, you can see that women have been depicted in many forms as the more beautiful and attractive sex - the one that has more sexual appeal. That doesn't mean that there aren't godly looking men, of course, because there are plenty. But because of that, and because of the allure it seems women naturally have, I feel like it's more understandable to be lesbian rather than to be gay. That's just how I feel, I dunno. In any case, love is love, and if people are gay or lesbian, it doesn't directly affect me in any way. As long as they're happy.

    • Well i disagree with you as i am straight and i find guys hotter but okay... You didn't exactly answer why i'm disgusted by lesbians.. Maybe csuse i dont find girls attractive in tht way

    • I find guys hotter too, absolutely. But I'm aware and I realize girls are more sexually appealing. I think it's a natural thing. About why you're disgusted by lesbians - well, specifically, I don't know. You feel how you feel and it's not an agree-disagree discussion. It's a personal matter. It could be that because you find no attraction to girls whatsoever, whenever you see two girls engaging in a relationship or any sexual act, it revolts you because it's so foreign in your mind. Maybe seeing guys who are gay is more understandable to you because YOU yourself are attracted to guys and can therefore relate to it on a personal level. Best explanation I can give.

  • No. I wouldn't say you are homophobic. I personally don't like seeing that stuff either. Not quite to the point where I feel I'm gonna puke lol. But it still feels unnatural to me (and so do gay guys kissing). I don't have a problem with it. I would never try try to stop anyone from being happy either. I think it's just because you're straight and the thought of a being with a woman is gonna gross you out. Seeing it in live action will too. My boyfriend is the same. He says he could never even think about being with a guy because it is just gross to him and it cringes him out. But he has no problem at all with gays and has gay friends.

  • Yes that's called homophobic alright.

    Did you know that people with very strong homophobic feelings are actually gay themselves? It takes often many years and many psychological problems to cope with this and to come out of the closet.

    If i were you i would just try it and kiss a girl. (Maybe a good friend who's willing to help you to come out? ) It can be an eye opener for you!

    cdn29.us1.fansshare.com/.../...dors-1226975109.jpg

    • @Lil_Wítch What makers you think that every person who are strongly homophobic are gay?

    • Being grossed out is subconsciously thinking I don't want the image of that happening to me or there's something i consider unclean as in actually associated with some thing that could make you unwell or pose a threat. I think sexuality itself could probly be deconstructed into individual elements you like or dislike (dominance , hairiness , bounciness , playfulness , if there seen as compertitect ) but finding it grose suggests you instinctively find the elements and or combination a nasty image to you. A simpler example would be I'm grossed out by slugs because i associate them with disease and sharp teeth that i subconsciously link with what i've seen in horror films. I also don't particularly like seeing gay guys do things but it's considerably less bad if there not hairy badly formed or fat it's the elements and associations that make it gross and that make us straight , gay or bi being attracted to big breasts , smoky eyes , light brown skin it's these elements mixing.

    • @MysteriousDarkness https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/8772014

    • Show All

  • Most men who have an unreasonable hate or "fear" (yeah right, it isn't fear, it is called being a douchebag) against gay men are usually closet gays. They have been brought up to think that it is bad, wrong, gross, and sinful to be gay, so they are in denial and think that hating them will help "cure the gay away". It doesn't work.
    Oh, the same concept goes with lesbians.

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What Girls & Guys Said

10 16

  • The answers to your questions respectively are: 1) because you're bad at minding your own business 2) and yes.

  • I think its media... brainwashing people to think a certain way.

    • i agree :)

  • Cause a part of you know it's unnatural? Men and men, women and women aren't suppose to go together. If they were there be no need for the opposite sex, it just goes against nature. I'm not afraid of gays either but I don't want to see them doing it either. People like to throw the term homophobic if you don't agee or share the same views..

  • Is grass green?

  • Well it's refreshing to hear about an girl in GAG who didn't have lesbian tendencies. :)

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