If men are acting offended about that, it's either because they have acted inapprorpriately towards women and feel bad about it, or because they hear about it all the time and tired of hearing about it. Neither reason is good, but I can't think of any other reason that men would get offended by hearing about sexual harrassment.
I will say that in my own life, when I hear women complain about sexual harassment, I often find myself at a loss for words and I could see that as coming across offended. It definitely doesn't offend me though... At most, I'm just not really sure what to say because I genuinely believe that men are doing what women say men are doing, but I don't quite understand why I don't see it happening more often in my own life. Times that I have witnessed sexism stick out to me like a sore thumb.
My only point being that if men really are harassing women the way women claim, one would think that men would see other men harassing women more often. It's kind of tough to help stop something if we don't see it happen.
So taking away the idea of ALL!
Because the second we use the word all, or attack a gender then I think it is normal to feel attacked,
Just imagine the nicest person who would never do such acts and tries hard to do What is right and then your spouse says ALL which that person is a part of all, which puts all if their efforts into the trash and that person is just another crappy person. With no hope of ever being able to be more.
And now they are terrified of doing anything that might put them in that same box but it feels like eggshells and it's just a question of time till they become part of this ALL culture that you put forth.
And so I'd say that it's important for you to share your past trauma's, but it's just as important to not give your spouse that feeling of you are part of this ALL.
In my experience when people talk about trauma's they are speaking aggressively and blaming in a general manner.
Instead of being assertive about what they feel and blaming a specific person for doing those acts.
It's sad that today the world created this hatred between people and genders.
Hopefully one day we can all heal from our past and work to build a better future.
Truly I think it’s a lack of empathy.
I’ve had this conversation with so many men, even guys I’ve dated and find 9/10 times, I talk about a woman being raped/assaulted and the response from men is usually:
- men get raped too
- how do you know the women didn’t fake it
- why are we only talking about women.
When I asked about women being harassed most don’t get it. Interestingly though, I once took a guyfriend to a gay club - he got hit on all night and had to keep asking guys to stop touching him. I was able to then explain to him that that’s my day to day reality, not jus in a club but on the bus, on the train, when I’m walking down the road and now he gets it
See this is the problem with you girls you know , you fuck with the mind of the one guy that is trying to love you and keep you happy. What is that you want from them to do? He is not the guy that has raped someone or abused someone you taught him a lesson that was not in his curriculum. After that test was with you? Or broke up? Just curious to know asking genuinely
@Aakash_Hangargi we’re not together, just friends and it wasn’t a test, I took him along to for another friend’s birthday but it was just interesting to see. Generally all men can support women by calling out harassment or misogynistic language, have an open conversation about it with his friends (because statistically it’s likely you know someone who behaves wrongly and might not be aware there’s anything wrong with their behaviour), support all victims of sexual assault by listening to them and not judging/stigmatising them and intervening when you see another man harassing, stalking or behaving abusively towards women
Well all is true what you said , but one cannot simply judge who is wrong in certain situations. And tbh even if you consider it test or not but it seemed to be done on purpose most people would call it a test. Also when women would start calling out other women , i think men will also do same and even so today there are many men who come forward i. Situations of abuse and help the victims. But let's say a guy is accused of false rape allegation how many women would even really think that he is not the abuser bit victim generally even guys and girls will both support women. Women in such cases are very much supported by men , if the roles were reversed women donot support much
I have noticed this, some guys (not all) act like they just don't want to hear about it, that it should be hidden and buried, since they didn't actually do it, it doesn't apply to them.
I don't think they realize just how traumatic it is, they think therapy can fix anything.
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I wrote a post about females being abused when I first joined GAG and I was viciously attacked by males.. it was crazy!
They started saying how males are more physically abused by females and all down that line of baloney. Yes, it happens but they take it too far.
Hehe so its ok when a women wants to be heard or vent on her situations. But if a man does it , it's baloney and lol they also just want to be acknowledged as how women's abuse stories are acknowledged.
@Aakash_Hangargi No, it's baloney when they start saying that they are more physically abused by women than women are by men, that's all
Exactly my point in your view it's impossible for a guy to abused as much as a women , in same way in his view women can't be abused as much as men
The guys who get offended, are usually the ones who do that sort of shit and refuse to acknowledge that their actions are disgusting and abusive. And if they’re not those guys, they’re the friends of said guys and share the same misogynistic beliefs.
The guys who don’t get offended and actually understand where women are coming from, you the real MVPs ❤️
I don't think the issue comes from women talking about it. I personally don't take offense to it. The issue is the implication by some women that all men are like that, to the point that even saying "not all men" is used as a counterargument.
As to how bad it's gotten, a British member of parliament actually proposed a 6pm curfew for all men, to prevent women being sexually assaulted. A 6pm curfew for 50% of the population, sorry but I draw the line at that.
For example, there are men out there who commit sexual assault, and there are women out there who falsely accuse men of sexual assault. Now I would never dream of suggesting that all women are like that, but somewhere along the way it became socially acceptable to say that all men are. I just can't wrap my brain around it.
@subarugirl, Most men can openly admit these things are wrong and should never happen, nobody can justify abuse of any kind.
I think for some reasons, they feel like they can relate and probably see themselves in the same shoes with those abusers. If they are a good, decent man, they won’t get offended when we call them out for their sick behavior. I notice in general, they just don’t care about other women till it happened to their family members, that’s when they lost their damn mind.
It is disturbing how some take steps to justify others actions.
No one likes to feel guilty... even if it is guilty by association.
Probably because they just can't get it through their heads that we're not talking about all men and how when we rant about something you can expect us to use hyperbole.
They also HAVE to dissect every little thing.
They also think that we constantly are trying to bash them.
None of these things are true at least not for a lot of us women (In fact the majority of us).
I don't feel offended... not even when random people refer to me as "part of the problem" on whatever happened to them or someone they know without knowing me at all and what I am about
also, those are not men... they're mitches, I am sure of that
Reminds me of white people getting offended when minorities talk about their struggles.
Perhaps the problem is how it is presented and addressed.
I've not experienced men getting offended by this but I can imagine it happening with some men. I've got no explanation what they would though.
most men do not get offended. The ones that do are sick and should be avoided.
You're probably just a complainer... People generally don't like to listen to nagging.
Nobody gets offended. But let's talk about you. Why do you keep whining and complaining and calling all men rapists. You keep generalising all men into that category of anti-women misogynist. Why do you specifically like to play victim so much? You've posted 3 very similar rants in a couple days. Are you an 8 year old? Does crying and complaining and getting sympathy make you feel better?
I think the more concerning point is why you keep getting offended by the facts. Should we not talk about issues in order to address them? Should we not try to understand where others are coming from and the struggles they face? Or would you rather brush issues that effect the women in your life and those who may come into your life under the rug?
What are you talking about?
You've never heard guys use the phrase, "not all men"? Well the comments in this my take is a pretty good example
Same goes for women getting offended when men bring up the quite common false accusations that most women try to deny.
Men are victims of abuse, sometimes even physical, and it is largely dismissed. While women are far more vulnerable with men than the other way around; in this climate of smash the patriarchy and toxic masculinity, I think men are feeling a bit forgotten.
Most people getting offended about it online are pretty much trolls that are trying to get a reaction from people, its best to ignore trolls.
It makes them feel defensive because they misinterpret that as us painting them all as abusers, which is not the case. Thats like saying I was robbed once by a hobo and having that misinterpreted as saying that all hobos are thieves.
That's why some are also very quick to state the obvious, that men are also abused. We know this. Most everyone on earth knows this, but they still bring it up due to that misinterpretation.
Nothing wrong with " sexually objectifying girls". Its the basis of attraction and does them no harm.
To objectify someone is to dehumanize them. To dehumanize is defined as the action of degrading someone to the status of a mere object…. I’m pretty sure the same logic you’re using was used to justify slavery
It does not dehumanize them. It elevates them. The historic functions of women are child rearing first... and then sex to validate husbands who sustain the household. There was no logic in slavery other than free labor because Democrats were unable to practice free enterprise. Nobody justifies it. I know you don't like any of this, but you don't have to.
No according to the definition of the word. ob·jec·ti·fi·ca·tion noun 1. the action of degrading someone to the status of a mere object.
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