Why does a woman have to have "no self respect" just because she has occasional one night stands with guys she just met?

She has needs just like men. She is single and has hormone. Just because of that doesn't mean she has no self respect. Why do people think that.
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Girls One night stands

    Well people often say that girls who have one night stands "will spread theiregs for just anyone" but that's not really true.

    instinctualy guys are more likely to find casual sex desirable meanwhile girls are more likely to find sex desirable after she's gotten him to emktionally commit to her (relationship sex)

    Girls actually have somewhat high standards for who they are willing to hAve one night stands with just like they have highly standards for relationships. their standards are different however.

    in a hookup scenario, where girls more than ever have control over sex they kinda have the pick of the litter and can choose from who they see as the most attractive, confident, or fun. Those are the three qualities that if a guy has he will be rewarded with sex. Girls can actually get a guy more attractive than her for a one night stand. Not saying a 4 can get a guy who is a 9 but a girl who is a 5 could get a 6 or 7.

    Guys who have one night stands actually have low standards for one night stands. Guys are more likely to sleep with girls who are less attractive than him. His mentality is "well if I don't have to take her out or get to know her and work for it then I'll take what I can get" "If she's willing to put out now NSA then j don't care how attractive or interesting she is"

    that's the way it is, It's easier for a girl to convince a guy to have sex with her than it is for her to convince a guy to take the time to date her and commit to her.

    For a guy it's the opposite, it's easier for a guy to get a girl to let him date her and make a commitment than it is to convince her to just have sex with him

    Girls look at it the other way, we'll if he's not going to be taking be out or getting to know me then he had better me at least AS attractive as I am or somewhat better. Either that or he's really confident fun/interesting.

    • so a guy getting a one night stand means a girl sees him as desirable enough that he doesn't have to wait for sex or make any sort of investment. A girl having a one night stand means that she was good enough for the guy to have a night of fun with but not so much that sex with her is worth making any sort of emotional or financial investment (dating). that's why it's looked st differently although I wouldn't say it means the girl has no self respect it just means she uses her advantage to get what she wants.

    • Girls will not give out free sex to just anyone. In fact girls are more likely to hold out on sex for the guys they want a relationship with. They'll make the relationship guy wait maybe a month or two meanwhile it was free and easy for her one night stand. So in a way she treats her one night stands better than the relationship material guy.

    • Did you copy paste this or do you type that fast on your phone? :O

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  • Okay, women love sex just as much as men do... However, where the self respect comes in, is who they sleep with. Some women will sleep with just about any guy, because they love sex that much, are desperate, or whatever the case may be and the guys are often complete douche bags that treat her like shit, and she puts up with it because she wants to get laid. Women with self respect won't sleep around with just about anyone, and most likely wouldn't sleep with someone she just met without at least putting up a bit of a challenge to the guy.

    And the reason why these sorta women get labelled sluts, is because it's easier for a woman to get laid, than it is for a man. Sex should be the man's fault... I mean, which to you sounds better when telling your friends: "I slept with him because I was horny," or "I slept with him because i just couldn't resist him." The latter puts the blame of sex on the guy, which labels him a stud. The former gets the girl labeled as a slut (which most women don't want). Again, because it's easier for women to get laid than it is for men.

    Self respect is about choosing what is right for you. If you sleep with someone, even though they're aren't right for you, have STDs or whatever, that shows lack of self respect because you are lowering your own standards.

    • Enlightenment.😕

    • You just said " I think sex should be the guys fault and bc I've said its the guys fault that's why women get called sluts. there's no reason iin your " reason" you're just going in circles agreeing with yourself.. There's no reason for anyone to get called a slut bc a persons sex life is only their business no one elses. The slut double standard so called goes like this: Guys sleep around by definition are self proclaimed sluts bc it's ntural for them to want and have sex. The thing is If guys naturally have lots of sex and women are not naturally supposed to have lots of sex then the guys are raping women or fucking men. So women get called sluts to cover up the illogic of male but not female promiscuity. No one gets called names bc something comes easy to them. That's bs. If they are good at it and out effort into it they get rewarded --except women and sex. A woman having sex bc she enjoys sex, isn't hurting anyone.

    • Even IF it came easy to her whoch is a generality and can't be used to explain away each individual Womans sexual experience whereas slut gets used generally -she STILL is not hurting anyone assuming the sex is consensual between herself and the guy. What is an example of something someone does that by them doing hurts no one and that comes easy to them - for which the they called derogatory comments? I've heard it compared to a guy who sleeps around by lying snd oretending he wants a relationship. TheresNO comparison when neither the woman or man want a rekationship from the second. She's not leading anyone on she's just having consensual sex. Funnily women also get called names by NOT having sex. Slut has nothing of do with sex coming easy... People don't get shamed bc they are good at something unless they exploit others with it-eVen then not necessarily. Women get slut shamed bc guys take pride in conquests and don't like the fact their gf may have had more sex than him.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • Honestly, I think people use self respect wrong when they use it in situations like that. I mean, clearly it's what she wants? As long as she's responsible and she's not hurting anybody (for instance, by sleeping with taken men) I don't see the problem? Like wtf does sex have to do with self respect?
    If she was USED by a man (or several men) knowingly, like if she wants a relationship and she KNOWS they only want sex, THEN I would think she lacks some self respect because she's putting their selfish needs before her own (their casual need for sex vs. her serious need for an actual relationship). If a person lets someone else use and abuse them, THEN I would think said person lacks some self respect because he/she willingly puts up with bullshit like that.
    But that's totally different from casual, consensual sex where both parties agree to a certain set of rules/boundaries, and the both of them are on the same page as well. That's 100% harmless (and fun) and has absolutely nothing to do with self respect.

  • Why does a woman have to have "no self respect" just because she has ocassional one night stands with guys she just met?
    Likely because guys want to control female sexuality out of fear of getting a used gal/town bike for a partner. Plus it seems that for a guy regarding a gal of not having self-respect makes it easier for him to be sexual.

  • You can have your fun but still be classy about it. No one has to know about your sex life as long as you are safe and responsible. It is no one's business but your own. Trust me on this. You can come across as perfectly classy and respectable while enjoying a solid sex life. It is just all about how you carry yourself :)

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Just stupid double standrads of this hypocritical society.

    Men have it bad as well, because virgin men are shamed and called losers while virgin women are respected and desired.

    • Good point

  • it's not that she has one night stands, it's that she does it in exchange for money, directly or indirectly. Sometimes money doesn't change hands, but the guy pays for everything, it's the same thing really, just sex for money.
    Some girls I know haven't paid for a drink or a restaurant meal themselves in months!

    • Womdn get called sluts bc of sex when there is absolutely no money involved. or if she pays for everything.

    • Oh come on, how often does THAT happen? I don't know a single available girl who regularly pays for anything when she goes out with a guy. I mean, over the age of 16, anyway.

  • In the words of Christina Aguilera:

    "If you look back in history
    It's a common double standard of society
    The guy gets all the glory the more he can score
    While the girl can do the same and yet you call her a whore"

  • There's a presumed assumption that casual sex is bad, and if she respected herself she wouldn't do it. The source of that assumption is rarely articulated.

    Note that it -can- be true that some girls with low self esteem will have sex when they are not horny because its the easiest way for them get some attention. But... that's not all cases, and even when it is a case, well, I guess the question is does it make her feel better or worse?

    • Would u say it's worst if she does it because she is horny?

    • Rather than self esteem issues

    • No. I dont' know that either are 'bad' unless she feels bad after.

  • An analogy to men and women having sex would be something like this: There are two hunters. One is starving. So he grabs his rifle that has only one bullet - he knows he can't waste it. He goes in to the forest and starts tracking a deer. He follows him for two three days trough the forest and swamp. His clothes are torn, he's dehydrated, he's starving, cold, sick and exhausted. Then he spots the deer in his sights and shoots for the head. The Gods smile on him and give him a headshot. He knows he won't drag the entire thing home and he hears wolves in the distance so he cuts of his leg and goes home. He arrives home and sees the other hunter who just went outside and yelled for a deer to come out of the forest. And one actually comes out. The other hunter kills it and then cooks and eats it later. And he does it again the next day and the day after.

    Now of course the first hunter will not have respect for the other since he has it so comparably easy.

    • Where does the female fit in this.. amplify

    • My point was that females are like the second hunter that had to pretty much call for a deer and a deer arrived at their doorstep. Now of course this is oversimplified but it's not far from the truth - guys have to do almost all of the heavy lifting when it comes to finding a relationship or sex partner.

  • The answer is in the question.
    She has no self respect just because she has one night stands. This is a fundamental upbringing and wiring issue which makes her unsuited to marriage and family.

  • Because people are riding on a moral high horse, and think it's impossible for her to not get gifts in return for sex.

  • Because most of these men you sleep with don't respect you or give two shits about you, plus they could have STDs.

    • I doubt girls respect these men either, so it is a double standard

    • @fearful - true, those men have no self-respect either, and you're right that it's a double standard.

  • It's beacuse society thinks (or people in it pretend to think) that a woman cannot have sexual desire without emotional interest. Of course, society is an idiot. Don't get me wrong though, one night stands are much worse than society's perspective to women, but it's a topic of another question.

  • how many times will you post this question?