Why does my friends with benefits keep talking about having kids?

[Anonymous]

He asks me things like oh are ready to have kids because I’m financially at the moment ready. Then while having sex he’ll say oh better wear a condom we don’t want kids just yet. Why he even think about kids when he’s not serious about me? It just seems weird to me. Every time I see him he’ll mention not having kids now but later.

[Anonymous]

In your age range, if he doesn’t have kids then he may just be eager to get on with it.


I had a friend who met a guy online, they were friends with benefits for a few months before he started talking about getting her preggo, trying to set a date, saying how much he wants kids, really very pushy of the subject but he would NOT commit, too busy, still hurt from the past, just such weird shit! Like how can you want A and not B?


Luckily she cut ties but moral of the story is don’t let things talk you into pregnancy just for the sake of having a baby and he doesn’t want a relationship. Only exception is if you are on board with the co-parenting thing and ready for motherhood, if you aren’t already one.

[Asker]

He has two kids but they are adopted and he doesn’t along well with them. he's older than me so I figured at his age he wouldn’t want kids.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah maybe he just wants a kid of his own, could be like a midlife crisis sort of thing or he just wants that real “dad” experience he didn’t get with the adopted kids. Then if you don’t have any he may feel like you’re more open to the idea. But that’s a lot to ask unless you are ready for that too then sure go for it, we aren’t getting any younger

[Asker]

Maybe. I don’t have any kids. He adopted his kids when they were older (over age 9). He’s a really good dad and will do anything for his kids.

[Opinion Owner]

That’s good to know, do you feel open to having a baby?

[Asker]

I never thought I would want kids. Though I would be open to having a baby with him. I trust him and he’s there for I need him. He’ll also do anything that make me happy. If I’m hungry we’ll go wherever I want to eat. He even brings me breakfast in bed after a night of sex.

[Opinion Owner]

Ok, & that’s not bad, you’re both adults and it’s your choice. Would you be fine if you weren’t in a relationship and just co-parenting?

[Asker]

Yes I would be ok with just co-parenting with him. Though it would be something I would have to discuss with him. So I know exactly what I’m getting into and what he would expect from me.

[Opinion Owner]

If it’s something you’re up for then sure, have that talk. Just be careful going into that, bc it may be very different than you expected, especially as first time mom. But it is doable and will work if you make a good, support team.

[Wise4myage]

He's smashed through the boundaries of an friends with benefits relationship.

[Iron_Man]

Maybe he likes you