Because they don't like to think of someone they like in that way, it's counter intuitive. Once there is trust though then you can really let go and indulge in your naughty little desires. Trust goes for men as well as women, we all need it. He needs to trust that calling you those things (if he wants to, he may not like it at all!) is not going to make you think he really thinks you are a whore, that you aren't going to start thinking that's what he really thinks of you. Also he needs to trust that you aren't a whore or a slut, he needs to trust you aren't fucking anything that moves and getting every guy to call you awful names and defile you in a thoroughly awesome manner.
I think a good way of doing this is to be HIS slut, his whore. Not anyone else's. Make a point of that.
But talk to him, that would help. I whisper in my guy's ear and ask him to call me filthy names. Nice and simple, seems to work.
I'm single.. But my man would have to do that. I'm talking about a friends with benefits
That's trickier. Try the same technique?
I think aside from differing with guy's personalities (how sexual they are, overall levels of inhibitions), that's also a product of society telling for decades to treat girls super delicately and all. Not to mention the whole thing of how only recently did the taboo of sex for just pleasure and outside of marriage begin getting broken down.
If you want your guy to start doing that in the future, tell him! A while back, I mentioned to my guy that I'd read some stuff online about the whole d/s dynamic some people have, and some related dirty talk. I told him that to some degree, I find things like that pretty hot. Ever since then, he's been surprising me with a whole bunch of 'good girl', 'bad girl', asking me to tell him how badly I want his dick, almost begging for it?
For the most-part, a matter of positive reinforcement. :)
I luv that... How bad u want this dick. Hmm
hahah yeah, it's taking me a bit to not get all sheepish about it but I like it overall. On the odd occasion that I reply to that question confidently about how badly I want it, he'll reply with calling me a slut/whore so.. certainly a good way to keep things interesting!
I completely hear you girl. But guys are really scared to disrespect women that way because most of them were brought up being told that you do not call women does names. Most women don't want it, but there are a select few like us to get turned on by it. usually I have to tell a guy that I find it hot, it takes a little bit of an adjustment period, but once they realize it's okay, it opens the door for fun.
also if you're in a relationship, usually you have to reassure your guy that you are his little slut, that usually helps him feel more confident and like taking more control
This kind of reminds me of when I added one of my college professors on Facebook and after I graduated he told me to call him by his first name. It was just so weird. Even though I knew I was no longer a student and he told me to do it, it just felt disrespectful. To this day (years later) it feels weird, actually, haha.
I suspect it's kind of the same with this... many men are brought up believe that it's wrong and disrespectful to say those kinds of things to women (and women generally make it clear they don't like it... I mean, you wouldn't want some random stranger to call you that stuff). So even when it's not inappropriate because the girl wants it during sex, it still feels wrong and uncomfortable.
So they'd still feel uncomfortable in the heat of sex? Its not the same as in an argument.
Being in a friendly rather than academic context didn't help me with calling my professor by his first name! Also a lot of guys aren't as confident during sex as you might think. We also worry about screwing up and not being good enough and stuff like that.
Many men feel uncomfortable because they were taught to be nice to women. So if you ask them to do it, they could need some time to get used to it.
And if you don't ask them to do it, they won't do it.
The number of men who do this without being asked is rather small.
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!Take the lead in bed, then. Let him know what you want.
That's the problem
The only problem I see, is a lack of communication, and perhaps sexual incompatibility. If the two of you aren't open about what you want in the bedroom, then it sounds like your sex life isn't going to be as fulfilling as it could be.
Yes. This is very true girl. Thanks for heads up.
Guys are afraid that it will that calling females those things will offend there female lover Tell your bf you want to be called those name when your being his bitch
It's just preference. I'd love that. My wife hates it.
Find the right guy.
Mostly not being told it's ok. And fear that it isn't ok. "You like that don't you bitch" could mean her having an orgasm, but it could also mean me not having an orgasm for the next week.
That's deep.
Hurray for puns.
I'd do whatever turns my girl on honestly so just tell him, I think that's hot
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