You bring up a very real issue. I’ve often brought that up here within various topics mostly dealing with female aesthetics trends and fashion, as well as female sexual performance expectations. I’m not afraid to talk about it and bring it to the forefront of conversation because it’s a real problem. Porn causes women to constantly do things to their body to modify it or add fake things, or to remove good, healthy, and natural features of maturation such as pubic hair. It causes women to feel the need to look complicated instead of simple and feminine. If these things aren’t directly pushed by a boyfriend or spouse, they are most certainly indirectly and systematically engrained into societal norms and pop culture from porn. It’s designed to humiliate, objectify, normalize pedophilia, remove human emotion and love, and even frustrate procreation and the natural/anatomically correct method of vaginal and loving intercourse, replaced by more violent forms including anal, mock-up rape, painful stuff such as slapping, strangling, hair pulling, and oral to the extent of ejaculating in places such as the face and mouth which make a girl uncomfortable. No attention is placed on giving. Sex is about giving of one’s body and heart to the opposite in order to show love and affection, as well as to selflessly cause pleasure for the partner. It’s purpose is to complete the male and female as one flesh. It’s supposed to be a sacred and beautiful act between a man and woman. It’s not a show to exploit women and act as if they aren’t a person but rather expendable material that can be used, abused, and then discarded as if there is lesser value than a doormat!
It's really encouraging to see a man who recognizes all of this and can put it all into words. Porn companies have to use shock tactics to compete for clicks and now it's normalized infantilization and brutalization of women. Young men even complain about women having mature darkened areolae instead of the tiny light-colored nipples more commonly found on prepubescent girls, they call them "pepperonis". Then there is the accusation that "roast beef" or elongated labia are caused by promiscuity when in reality they are caused by 1. having the gene for it and 2. GOING THROUGH PUBERTY!!! All the signs of maturity that are meant by evolution to signal a woman's fertility and maturity to a man are hated and mocked now except for like breast growth! There was a recent twitter thread about labia-plasty (a risky surgery to remove labia) where most women expressed that they began hating their labia around age 12-13 ... it's because we know from an early age that the ideal is what we had BEFORE puberty. The tiny, almost invisible labia minora of a prepubescent little girl are the ideal and any woman who is "lucky" enough not to experience much external genital growth into adulthood is prized. It's soooooooooooooooo fcking weird. Like you said even adult body hair is hated on women and it often feels like we are supposed to have the skinny hairless body of a child but with HUGE adult breasts (with little girl nipples), a big adult bum, a childlike face, and the look of a child between the legs too.
It's funny because male beauty ideals used to be that of adolescent boys back in ancient Greece and Rome when men frequently used boys from the ages of around 12-19 as prostitutes. If a man had a long flaccid penis he would be mocked as it was seen as "sloppy" and a sign of aging which was opposite to the "taut" ideal of a young man or boy. Evil old pervert characters in plays were often given fake ones to wear to symbolize their ugliness. Yet people pretend the sex industry has no effect on society! It always has!
@Minxxie You are so right on! It’s so refreshing to see a woman understand it too. Guys such as myself will talk about these things to try to bring awareness to what we see as a problem while appreciating the natural adult developed female body, but a lot of younger women who subscribe to the modern pop fashion industry take offense to it being brought up because they don’t know anything different. It’s so sad. You literally are hitting the nail right on the head with regard to everything you have said. This whole mentality with a designer labia is very disturbing. So many women think their labia is not sufficient or beautiful because they are going by a standard they are told they must go by. What you said is so important, the adult labia should be what is seen as attractive and beautiful. Not a child like labia. And pubic hair should be what is seen as beautiful and attractive because it indicates womanhood, not childhood. I find it interesting that so many younger men want to do anal based oral. They seem to have no issues with the potentially unsanitary and unnatural nature of that, but yet they find pubic hair to be somehow “gross” if they do oral? It doesn’t make any sense. It’s quite obvious they are watching a lot of shock value porn or have been conditioned to think that its somehow normal.
You state below that "MOST guys are delusional about sex". Delusional - very strong word. And how many are "most guys". More than half? Two-thirds? 75% ? Statements like "most" weaken your argument unless you've been with an awful lot of guys or have discussed this with a LOT of men.
In short, the guys you're talking about make up a very small percentage of guys any sane woman would choose to date in the first place. Datable men understand that porn is fantasy and you can't "expect" that kind of sex from most women, and by most, I mean at least half.
That said, I have a very high body count and I have been with very many different women, some of whom were extremely kinky and wanted porn-like sex some of the time. I've been with women who wanted to slapped around, choked, tied down, gang banged, whipped, fisted and more. I've been with women who've told me they can't even get off on straight sex.
Then too, I've been with women who were quite the opposite. So while I appreciate PositveFlight's take on what he thinks sex "should be", for some folks it's all that and a whole lot more kink, and that's what they consider giving to be.
There have always been models, be it in Vogue or Playboy or any magazine. Now they're on Insta and TikTok or Snap. The medium has changed, but that's all. Only the idiots you wouldn't date anyway think they might stand a chance with a hot Insta model, just like they imagined they could have landed some Playmate if they only had the chance.
This whole expectations thing is a solution looking for a problem. "Most men" are not delusional about what their girlfriend should look like, they just fantasize a lot. If you want to talk about delusional, let's talk about how 100% women don't accept that between 20 and 45 percent of guys are going to cheat, when thousands of years of history prove that they will.
Women also cheat at the same rate so who really cares
Not according to stats, but that's not even the point of your post, nor the whole point of my reply.
Recent 2022 stats show that women cheat at the same rate. So like I said it’s totally alright. Women win majority of divorces anyways so she gets assets and money and child custody regardless. But you’re right that the point of your reply.
What's unrealistic? That women maybe shouldn't look like cows, they should eat healthy and work out? Doing so is good for their physical and mental health along with their sexual appeal.
I know a lot of guys that get turned on by watching petite pornstars getting plowed and stretched out by huge cocks but no one actually wants that girl. Most guys I know would never touch one. After all, who wants a sloppy loose bucket cunt that everyone's already had?
What women can learn from pornstars and Instagram models is don't be a slutty whore, stay fit and keep your legs closed so you have something worth wanting.
You can say that if you want but that’s what they get off to lust after and want and would prefer that than having sex with you. You’re not even a woman so get back on your actual account. I already know who you are.
Not all women are blind feminists. My comments did not condone porn or men watching it. The fact is, we can influence what a good man chooses to pay attention to by putting in effort to be attractive. It can go a long way to keep them from turning to porn. Shitty men will be shitty no matter what, you need to learn to identify them. If you stink, don't shave, dress like a slob, act like a bitch, stuff your face with garbage and don't work out, he's probably going to look at something else. You know men are visual creatures, we can give them something to look at or they'll find it on their own. Since this is my "actual account" I'm very interested to hear your insight on who I am, do pray tell? I thought I knew myself but please, enlighten me...
You need to learn to let men be accountable for their own actions and to stop treating them like grown children
It obviously depends what kind of porn you are watching if it’s like gang bangs or xl toys yeah I can see that as unrealistic for most people not for me anyway. Regular sex porn seems realistic enough normally not look as good as regular sex if anything.
I re read that and I meant those extreme porn are definitely not what I’m into in case that was unclear.
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!1. Guys who are addicted to porn tend to not know that about half of everything they learned from porn was bogus.
2. Why would guys NEED to talk about that subject? They are not bothered by it.
What is unrealistic about porn? I'd be more about how uneducational porn is to a woman's needs.
That is one of the ways porn is unrealistic
The Instagram model thing is driven by women, not men. Most guys worth dating do not expect their partner to look like Thot of the Month. Women compete amongst themselves about beauty standards.
I think many guys don´t have a clue about that to be honest since that´s the first time or the most time they see a woman naked. Besides that I think it´s a general example of blame shifting of guys. Guys know as well that it´s always easier to attack others and point out to women the dangers than trying to prevent themselves from the dangerous effects of porn.
Seems like you could have cut out the middle man and just gotten that therapy yourself.
You would also benefit from removing your head from your ass and making an honest attempt to objectively view reality for the first time in your life.
I hear men talk about this often.
I guess then we women may need to talk about how vibrators make many of us desensitized to men in bed. Goose, gander and all that.
I don't care. Your thoughts are your own. If you get programmed by watching porn and that makes you insecure because you don't like your body or you think dudes are suppose to have 13 inch dicks that's your own psychological issue. I you think you're special because ChatGPT AI bot like your photos and post short positive responses on your page that simulates human attention, then you're just locked in the matrix. Maybe you need to unplug and go outside and get some sunshine.
*If...
It’s obvious you do as you’re making comments that show you are bitter and jaded. I watch porn and often watch it with my boyfriend. What that has to do with it providing men with unrealistic expectations of sex? Oh yeah, nothing. You should get therapy.
Oh yeah, is that during your gay sex sessions?
Because it doesn't.
I've never looked at porn or Instagram and thought "gee, need to get surgery for another few inches of cock, and liposuction the abs to fit in!"
If you're weak minded then you'll always fall to unrealistic expectations be they in fashion mags, adverts or in peers.
It goes both ways. Many women want to talk about how hard it is for women. Many men want to talk about how hard it is for men.
Because people see things from their point of view and don’t want to put themselves into someone else’s shoes.
Porn is disgusting and it’s not unreasonable to not want a man who watches it especially in a committed relationship
Yeah you’re going to get people butt hurt. It’s now this website is full of perverts who will defend it. We live in a narcissistic world. Many people care only for their own wants and needs and never consider the other persons. Very one sided and good people many times get taken advantage of. Obviously these people don’t see it that way. You see it also on this site all the time. People ask questions and they’re clearly in the wrong and when they don’t get the answers they wanted to hear such as affirming they’re right in the situation. They get very angry with you
You are 100% right. Good take.
Thanks!
"Professional" non-amateur porn definitely gives unrealistic expectations about women's bodies.
Agreed and men never talk about that
Seeing as porn almost never meets my sexual expectations, I'd say I'm pretty realistic. However, men have talked about the unrealism of porn, but most of those men you aren't going to find on GaG.
I'm in complete agreement with you which is why I don't bother with porn anymorevas it's do unrealistic and fake.
What "unrealistic expectations" specifically?
Psychological studies show that overconsumption of porn leads to a disruption in brain chemistry. And if the person is a minor, porn can lead to a disruption in brain development. Some of the most common unrealistic expectations and conceptions that porn promotes include: unrealistic perspective regarding the appearance of a woman's body, a lack of knowledge of how to please the female body to lead her to orgasm, and a misconception of what women like or are capable of doing in sexual environments (ie sexuality fluidity, "squirting", intercourse back in forth between the vagina and anus without condom, washing, or lubing liquids, etc Studies also show that in the past 10 years there has been an increase in spousal rapes with 67% of those being reasoned as non consensual sex acts, most of which were described as the man being too rough without prior consent and 3/4 of those being justified by the male as "something [he] saw in porn".
1. Most "minors" that watch porn only do because their parents (the majority of the time that are single mothers) give their kids smart phones which gives them unsupervised access to the internet. 2. For the shape of a woman's body, do you mean to not be fat? 3. "Rape of a spouse" is usually from an abusive spouse (the woman) that uses sex as a weapon and is never intimate with her partner because she really just used him for his financial resources. And yes, I have read some of those same bias sexist studies too that are basically "men bad, women victims." You know, the typical intentionally dishonest studies. Porn is bad if it becomes an addiction and interferes with someone's planned time that they were supposed to take care of responsibilities, or if it interferes with their planned time with family/friends. And it is bad for children's development if they are watching it.
2. No? It mainly in terms of body functions and what can cause infections and bodily harm. Are you ok? 3. That’s not what spousal rape is. Spousal rape is when one person is a committed relationship says no to sex and the other person continued to have sex with them anyways. Again I’ll ask, are you ok? It appears you have some animosity and anger bundled up inside.
Just because you don't have beef doesn't mean you can stop liking beef. Sure you can't get a hot Instagram model but you sure as hell will dream about it and probably pay to get it at some point.
It's women who are getting really unrealistic. They know only about 1% of men actually fit into the top movie/dream type. Tall, dark, rich, handsome, loyal, warm and all that jazz. They dream about the guy and expect the average Joe to be like that. They feel envious of other women getting this and that (holy smokes! 5k for a hand bag).
Men do the same exact thing
Men’s expectations in regards to how they want their partner to look as well as the sexual experiences/act they want a woman to do are often as realistic. And when they don’t get their way, they’re often manipulative or throw fits.
This is some men just like some women have unrealistic expectations. It's unfortunately human nature. Some people will do things, say things, expect things that you don't agree is fair, nice or realistic.
Because I'm not interested, lol.
I’ve seen several men here discuss this as well as other negative effects of porn, such as being a demotivating influence and also a vector with which the elites can subvert and demoralize people.
Children's cartoons used to have a lot of slap stick violence in them but children never took that seriously because it isn't realistic.
Porn has a similar unrealistic quality. If you believe porn, then you would think men never want to ejaculate inside a girl and instead want to pull out and wank. How realistic is that - not very. Also you would have to infer we want to watch lesbian sex rather than having sex with women ourselves.
Porn is cartoonishly unrealistic and indeed there is cartoon porn. Men are well able to differentiate between porn and the real world.
What unrealistic expectations of women do you see porn causing? To discuss seriously I think we need to identify what unrealistic expectations might be kicking around. What unrealistic expectations have men had of you that felt was founded on porn?
I didn’t say anything about me or my relationships so you implying that is out of order. Stay in your place. You can go on and on about how porn isn’t harmful for men and doesn’t alter their perception of women sex and relationships but statistics say otherwise. Take it up with your gender.
Apologies if I intruded personally but if unrealistic expectations is the topic then it is best to enumerate so it can be discussed. Otherwise it becomes a broad vague political statement that is too much of a will o'wisp to be discussed. That seems to be where we are. You haven't hurt my feelings at all by the way. I was just interested in the statement is all and like any blanket statement I tend to analyze it.
I always thought it was the other way around!
women are most likely to think that porn is or should be realistic!
No it’s definitely men
So we’re going to keep pointing fingers, anyways Sorry you had to endure such toxic people
You mean how most women in porn do it because they want to and NOT because they were forced to?
What about all the high expectations of the men in porn? Because of porn, we're ALL supposed to have horse dicks and squirt gallons of cum as often as she wants it and be the most fantastic lovers in the world! How many guys in real life are like that? On top of that, WE do all the work and THEY get most of the pay!!
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