Why don't women like gentlemen and good guys?

It always amazed me that the guys that treat women like complete shit have the best looking women. and all the other women are chasing them. I am a gentlemen. I listen. I treat them like a lady. I get the door of the car for them. I give them flowers. I tell them they are beautiful. I do things with them so I can spend time with them even if it is not something I really want to do (or maybe a movie I don't really want to see..). And I routinely get thrown away. I want so bad for a woman to actually pursue me. To have a woman that really wants to be with me and not someone that tolerates me because she just doesn't have anyone else at the moment. What is wrong with women? why is it that you need to be treated like shit to want a guy? it is really frustrating. I cannot be that way to a woman. So I guess I am in for a long lonely time or a lot of dating that never goes more then a couple weeks.
Updates:
+1 y
Ok ladies, that was too much of a generalization. I apologize. I should have said why do so many women, not all ladies.
+1 y
I should also add that I think I finally found someone different. She had a lot of bad dating experiences previously. she has introduced me to some family and it went well. we have had 6 dates. maybe I found a woman that has had enough frogs...
1 1

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

30 15
  • From what u read here, you're doing ALMOST everything right (except for the "doing things i don't want to do for her sake".)

    What you're NOT doing is "moving the emotional needle".

    ---

    The female gender is very much more tuned into their emotions than us males are.

    The guys that attract females, spark emotional change in her; that chemically attracts women of all ages.

    Exchanging gentleman gestures and flowers for kisses and sexual play...doesn't work.

    ---

    I kid you not...EVERY SINGLE TIME a female considers a guy "boring", it is because he isn't emotionally stimulating her,

    aka he doesn't playfully tease, he doesn't openly flirt (you didn't mention flirting), he doesn't spark any type of conflict or contrast in conversation, he doesn't demonstrate in any way that he understands she is a sexual person.

    -------

    Start doing some of the above and I can trust and believe (as long as u make yourself look as attractive as u can)...that you will have better success.

    • Wise words !

  • I would love a man like you. Unfortunately where I live there aren't any men like you. So I will just stay single until I find one. Just to let you know we aren't all the same :)

  • Short answer, most women are evil birches.

    • "Bitches"

  • Women do like gentlemen and good guys but they also like a guy who can take control a leader so to speak something a lot of jerks or alpha male guys have.

  • Because most of the times they're not 'good guys'

  • Just like all guys aren't the same neither are females. I don't want a jerk for bf.

    • keep telling yourself that.

    • I will, now time to find a mirror so I can do it ;)

  • False. They do. Hot ones.

    • Even hot guys that don't "emotionally move the needle" with women have this problem!

  • I like a guy like you :). I just haven't found that yet. . All I found were assholes

  • Because most claiming to be 'nice' guys usually have entitlement issues and/or that's all they have to offer. Why be rewarded for something you're supposed to do in the first place?

    • I never expect anything in return for my manners. Other then to be treated with respect.

    • Mr. Asker...you're doing this backwards. The respect should be earned FIRST when it comes to all the treatment u give to a female that u wouldn't give to a guy. That's how people get taken advantage of.

  • i like cute mannerisms and good manners. that's what attracted me to my boyfriend.

  • I like guys who treat me like im a princess. Other girls are sluts

  • Love how all the girls say they want a nice guy but they can be slapped in the face with one and not know it! Dude has the same problem i am in nature a very "nice guy" but that shit just doesn't fly! Read magic bullets or even just start with the game, read up and study you'll quickly learn a few tricks that will help you out nice is for when you have the girl you want and have been in a relationship for a while. Remember never needy always assertive and be the leader opening a door is fine but jumping to her every need is wrong but read up and good luck

  • Only sexy guys can get away with the polite gentleman crap.

    Unless you have sleeves (the tattoos) are at least 6'5 or taller and prefer women half you age you will have to learn to be more edgy to attract their attention.

  • Lots of them do - but being nice doesn't create sexual attraction, shared values, shared humor, etc. Most people are fairly nice. The reason it seems like most guys with girlfriends are jerks is because relationships are hard and people complain too much. Most of the guys aren't really jerks, they're normal dudes learning about relationships.

    Display your good qualities, improve your weak points and don't invest tons of energy and emotion into someone you don't know very well or out of simple physical appreciation. You should be making sure she values and clicks with you as much as vice versa.

    • I agree with ur first paragraph; not all guys that are complained about are assholes! Sometimes those guys made a relationship rookie mistake, or made the classic "insensitive male error", or they got into an argument not too long ago and the girl is just blowing off steam from said argument.

  • Because of the wolves in sheep clothing. The guy we thought was nice and quite the gentleman turned out to be the complete opposite so when the real one comes along we're apprehensive and tend to proceed with caution. Or if he's too nice we wonder what's his ulterior motive. But that doesn't change what we desire in our men, we still want the good guy but we're just not sure what he "looks" like or if he even exist anymore.

    • Exactly. This is my point. It's not like us ladies purposely head out for the doucebags. It's the guys who usually start out as nice guys who end up being assholes.

    • Well, I told her that I understand that. I am very patient. She is worth waiting for.

  • gee I've never seen this question before.

    "the guys that treat women like complete shit have the best looking women."

    Maybe that's your problem: don't go for the "best looking women." If you shallowly focus on a woman based on her looks, you're going to get shallow disregard in return.

    • I would never go for the best looking women. I am nowhere near good looking enough to do that.

    • Well then maybe you need to stop attracting certain types of girls. If you let yourself be walked on, you have no one else to blame but yourself. If you don't expect respect, it won't happen.

    • I don't get treated badly. I just get the "your such a nice guy but I just don't feel..."

    • Show All
  • Unfort unately they want alpha males.. A s f..or me I'd rather have a kind hearted, meek female. . I'd never change who I am.

  • I thought it was just 17 year old "nice guys" that have this odd belief that you have to be an asshole to get girls?

    Anyway, it sounds like you're a bit desperate, try too hard to be nice to them, and really force your behavior around them. And then you wonder why they aren't drawn to you? Flip the scripts...could you be with a girl that acts incredibly fake?

    Being a gentleman doesn't mean becoming a door mat. A lot of "nice guys" tend to have a superiority complex about the way they act, thinking they're a rare gem and those "jerks and assholes" aren't the way to be. So that pretty much means that anybody who doesn't act like you is an "asshole". This simply isn't the case. Demanding respect from people is the way to be. Not being a doormat and not neglecting what you want isn't being an asshole, it's being reasonable.

    Why are you so afraid to stand up and be honest not only with yourself, but with girls too?

    • SPOT. ON. Instant upvote.

    • See QA? I was an "asshole" (by your definition) in this answer, and the girls agree with me. You're right, all it takes is being an asshole before they start seeing the sense in things... /sarcasm

  • You're probably not attractive enough for them.

    • certainly a possibility

  • I totally have never heard this before. i1223.photobucket.com/.../brandnewinfo.gif

    • LMAO

    • hahaha