Why is casual sex and high partner count more damaging to women as opposed to men? Also, what is the link between casual sex and marriage?

[Anonymous]

(Photo found online )

For a long time, there has been speculations over the effects of casual sex and partner count on both the sexes. Speculations included a higher risk of substance dependence disorders, depression, anxiety, etc. It seems as if these speculations haven’t been exactly true, perhaps half-truths or correlational at best. However, research shows interesting findings on this issue, specifically pointing to the fact that casual sex and high partner count has a MORE NEGATIVE impact for women’s wellbeing and emotions as opposed to men. I will present a few points of facts that include the following:

• Women who have slept with only their spouses are 65% more likely to report happy marriages. Although this percentage declines as the # of partners a woman has made, there are gradations (https://ifstudies.org/blog/does-sexual-history-affect-marital-happiness)

• Most Americans reporting one lifetime partner report the happiest marriages, although past one partner there are gradations that can be interpreted as trivial or nontrivial(https://ifstudies.org/blog/does-sexual-history-affect-marital-happiness

•“although having multiple sex partners was followed by substance dependence disorders for both genders, men were more likely than women to have a disorder when they had no or few sex partners whereas women who had more than approximately 10 sex partners in the same time period were much more likely to have a disorder than men.”

•“Women reporting more than 2.5 partners per year had much greater odds of being diagnosed with a substance dependence disorder than those with only one or no partners

My goal is not to provide an exhaustive exorcism on this issue, rather, provide some of my opinions and facts related to this topic. As I learn more, I intend to change my opinion or beliefs on this issue of course, but I shall up it up with the following.

I do not know why we have been saying that “women love sex just as much as men” like this is some parallel or proxy for the idea that women are like men in this regard. This is obviously not true and I believe can hurt women AND men when it comes to future intimacy. Decision-making and responsibility are important topics to talk about as well, so where high sexual partner count and casual sex are to be found, other negative issues dwell as well, that can affect men and women.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201304/the-lingering-psychological-effects-multiple-sex-partners%3famp

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3752789/

https://ifstudies.org/blog/does-sexual-history-affect-marital-happiness

http://s3.amazonaws.com/thf_media/2003/pdf/Bookofcharts.pdf

[hellionthesagereborn]

Because sex for women is far more dangerous then sex for men. For men the worse case scenario is getting a sexually transmited disease, which men are less likely to get then women (due to the nature of sex as you can probably figure out), best case they reproduce. For women worse case scenarios are sexually transmitted diseases but also pregnancy i. e. their is no upside for her EXCEPT for when the man she reproduces with stays with her to provide for her and the child. So for men their is no real downside for women their is a substantial downside. The reason why pregnancy is a down side for women is that she is slowly incapacitated (for all intense and purposes).

Life was hard historically, women where already not strong enough to do farming so they had to scavenge for food and with an ever growing child in them that also increased the demand of food on them (as their are now two to feed) she is also becoming less flexible, agile and becoming slower as the baby gets bigger. This would increase her risk of starving as well as risk of death from a predator as escaping or fighting were both highly unlikely. That's before you even get to the fact that after birth the baby is dependent on her for years to come as well. For the man again, the time he invested in having sex is the amount of time and resources he invests. So its only natural she would evolve a different reproductive strategy, one that deterred her from casual sex by making her less happy with it (as studies also show they are more likely to develop depression and anxiety from casual sex).

They also are more likely to have a specialized bonding system through sex because once the man commits her having sex with him increases the bond, for him sex doesn't do that because again, for him sex isn't the greatest point in investment for him. Along that note its also interesting to see that a man is twice as likely to commit suicide after divorce then a man who isn't yet for women the ending of the relationship does not increase rates of suicide. This could be in a way, the same mechanism that women have with sex, for him the investment is within the relationship and so that is how he bonds while she bonds with sex because that is the thing that has the highest risk and investment for her.

[kim45456]

Contraceptions can protect you from pregnancy and shit.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 Jesus Christ. Yeah yeah it can. So what? Did we have contraceptives 2 million years ago when humans first showed up on the planet? No. Did we have them 1 million years ago? No. Did we have them 500,000 years ago? No. Did we have them 5,000 years ago? No. Did we have them 2,000 years ago? No. Did we have them 1,000 years ago? Yes but they where incredibly uncommon. Did we have them 500 years ago? Not really, again, they existed but where uncommon. So when did we get widespread contraception's? about sixty years ago. Does evolution only exist when we want it to? No. So we can safely assume that we evolved sexual differences because over the course of millions of years we evolved and changed to adapt to the best situations we had. Again, this is really really straightforward. I'm sorry that you don't like the idea that we are different, but we are. You arguing that because we have contraceptives and therefore evolution didn't take place over the millions of years without it is just insane to be perfectly honest. Yeah I get it you want to know that you are completely free from biology, that you can do what ever you want when ever you want free of consequences. That's great, I want to believe I can eat what ever I want without my body storing it as fat because of the millions of years of evolution causing my body to store it away because starvation was the biggest threat for most of human existence. I also want to believe that I will live way longer then I will and pretend like women don't have longer life spans because that's pretty sexist that women get to outlive men simply because they are women. Is that how reality works though? No. So your comment is meaningless, what you want and what is are two different things, ignoring the impact of evolution because incredibly recently something changed is just willfully ignorance.

[kim45456]

Were are talking about todays world. I dont understand why a womsn should be slut shamed but not men

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 Okay, well one your still ignoring millions of years of evolution so that's still not an argument. Two, I never once said anything about "slut shaming", or shaming, or promiscuity from a morality perspective, so not sure why you would say that, kind of like me just randomly brining up that I think abortion is bad, okay but that's got nothing to do with the conversation at all so why say it here? Third, we "shame"(enforce behavior the society deems proper and healthy) women for sleeping around because it negatively impacts them in the long run due to biological differences. That's also why we shame men for being emotional, because men being emotional is a bad thing because it means that when they get angry they lash out and while its bad when women do it men are substantially stronger and thus can cause greater damage. its also why we shame many behaviors that men have. Acting as if shaming is always negative is completely foolish, as foolish and ignorant as pretending like evolution has no bearing on peoples actions or proclivities. All data show promiscuity has a negative impact on women, so women are pressured to not have casual sex because it hurts WOMEN. Society also pressures women not to be promiscuous because it increases the rate of single motherhood which causes catastrophic damage to society as it creates fatherlessness which increases the probability of criminality in children, depression, substance abuse, academic failure, poverty, and promiscuity which perpetuates the problem.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 So society "shames" women for sleeping around because it hurts women in the short term and society in the long term. That's also why they shame men for acting like women because in the short term it hurts the man because it decreases his value with women (say what you will, women are drawn to masculinity) but in the long run it hurts society because society relies on men taking risk to protect others, to build and create industry etc. etc. We all are shamed by society in one way or another and those mechanisms exist to preserve society and benefit the individual (like how we shame people who are irresponsible and live in the moment because it the long run drinking and partying your life away is not going to make you happy). So that's why this happens. Your free to ignore it, your not free from the consquences of the behavior (again, kind of like being an asshole, you can be one but your not free from people calling you out on your behavior).

[kim45456]

Why tf care society what women do? Western society is racist to blacks and discriminate muslims or even discriminate men. So is society right by doing thst? Why do you rely so much on society.

[kim45456]

So it is ok that men are not shamed for being whores?

[kim45456]

Or i know muslim communities shamin atheists and western people. So just because majority of the group shame certain things, it is ok to do that?

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 First and foremost society cares because again, your actions affect IT. If you are a single mother your child is more then likely going to become a criminal or a detriment to society, that hurts society so that is why it cares. Second, no, no and no, western society is not racist and the most hilarious part about this is, it is so not racist that it assumes everything it does must be racist. Mean while in Africa they commit genocide against whites, they commit genocide against rival tribes, meanwhile in the middle east they mass murder Christians (the most descriminated against group in the world), they mass murder ethnic groups that are not their own (like the kurds for instance). Meanwhile in asia they mass murder and descriminate against ethnic groups and religions that are not part of their own (like the Chinese muslims that are being oppressed in china (or the buddist monks of Tibet did to the Chinese). Why do you think that the only nations that have any note worthy amount of racial and ethnic diversity are ALL western nations? Your statement is patently and objectively false, period. Fourth that has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH WHAT IS BEING STATED. SO why say it?

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 I do not rely on society, I stated that social pressure exists and pretending like its always bad because you want to live your life free of consequence, to be told how its okay for you to destroy your life and every one's around you, because you want to be a terrible human being but still get told that your a wonderful person, because you want to sit around doing absolutely nothing of note but be told that your a special snowflake, is completely naïve and quite frankly stupid. Society pressures you to be the best version of yourself because that benefits society but it also benefits you. We tell you your a special little snowflake while you stand around doing nothing, what incentive do you have to go out and do something? None. If society tells you that every one is a winner, what incentive do you have to go out and become better? None. If society tells you that its okay, their is no consequence to casual sex and you should absolutely go run off and do what ever you want and indulge every single impulse you have, what incentive do you have to learn self control? None. You go off and you have sex with a bunch of guys and what do you get? PREGNANT. It doesn't matter if your using contraceptives, you will inevitably forget or it will fail or you being so incapable of controlling your own desires and impulses decide you like it better without contraceptives or can't be bothered to wait long enough to get a contraceptive and then you get pregnant.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 Why would society be against that? Because your not hurting you, your hurting others, your hurting that child who now has to grow up wondering why they don't have a daddy, your hurting that child who now has to have half the resources available to them that others have, one less source of information, and substantially less parent child interaction because your off now working a job to try and provide for that child because you couldn't be bothered to keep your legs closed and act like the adult you so desperately want to be treated as. That's why. You want to be a shitty human being, treat people like shit and be told how great you are for it, you want to shove a tub of lard down your throat and eat your sorrow away until your so fat you can't even function as a human being anymore, you want to jump onto every single dick you see heedless of the consequences, fine, you have that right no one can stop you from doing it but don't whine and complain when other people tell you its disgusting and destructive behavior.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 As for your statement about men being shamed, are you serious? Philanderer, womanizer, user, fuckboy, player, manslut/manwhore, lothario, playboy, rake. Yeah, men get shamed for it, the only people who pretend like they don't are women who want to run around and act like a child by indulging every single impulse they have. Further still the only reason why men can get away with the little bit that they do is because women DEMAND it. Because unlike women men get virgin shamed as well as slut shamed. Why don't you think its fair that men get shamed for things women don't huh? Why do you think its okay that men get shamed for not defending others or risking their lives while women are given a free pass huh? Why do you think its okay that women shame men routinely for being "cheap" because he doesn't want to buy them dinner on the first date even though women don't do the same for him, huh? Why do you think its okay for women to virgin shame men then bitch and whine that its unfair that men get to sleep around (they don't) huh?

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 Cut the bullshit pity party. The biggest utilizers of shame are WOMEN. Your doing it now. Stop acting like a child and act like the adult you claim to want to be treated as. You can do what ever you want, but their will ALWAYS be consequences and their will ALWAYS be people who don't approve (just like your doing now and just like every other woman does). Stop acting like a victim and grow a god damn spine (see what I did their? Women are never shamed for playing victim, but if a man is actually victim he better shut the hell up or he is weak. Women are never shamed for insulting and belittling men (as you have done) but men are shamed for being "misogynists" for doing the same). So in conclusion, YES. Shame is used to create a cohesive unit, to enforce good behavior and punish bad behavior. If you act like an entitled princess, you will get shamed for it so you act nicer and act responsibly. If you act like an asshole people will shame you for it so you treat people with respect and bring harmony back to society. If you indulge your impulses and act like nothing matters society will shame you for your complete lack of self control and acting like a child in order to prevent the bad behavior from spilling over and brining grief and suffering to others. All of which by the way is unrelated to the initial statement that men and women are biologically different and pretending like we are not is idiotic.

[DeshawnMGTOW]

@kim45456 Men are not whores or sluts. Both those words apply to women only. Learn the definition. That not me. Thats English. sorry. Also funny how men have to work hard to get sex and women only have to open they legs yet you think you can shame a man for being attracting enough or pay enough to get sex. LOL. Nice try lady

[kim45456]

@DesgawnMGTOW shut up whore

[TheFlak38]

@kim45456 is one of the dumbest girls we have seen on this forum. But at least she is fun to chat with. Her stupid comments are hilarious. IQ lower than grass.

[kim45456]

@helliontheseagereborn what are you talking about? You either shame both for doing that action, or none of them. I personally dont care what a man do, but would never date a promiscuous guy

[kim45456]

@TheFlak38 awww are you so mad at me, your childish insults are funny

[TheFlak38]

@kim45456 No dont get me wrong. Im not mad at all. I enjoy you.

[kim45456]

@TheFlak38 sorry i did not mean to hurt you by insulting your boyfriend

[TheFlak38]

@kim45456 LMAO XD real bromance shit right here. haha

[kim45456]

😊🙃🙃

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 First and foremost, as I have ALREADY pointed out, we do, we do shame men for sleeping around, I gave you a list of terms we use to shame men who sleep around. We literally act as if any man who wants just sex from a woman is some how using her even though she is just as responsible for that casual sexual encounter as he is. WE LITERALLY call him a user as if he was a predator preying on some poor girl, again, even though she is suppose to be his equal. So WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GETTING THIS FUCKING IDEA THAT WE DON"T SHAME MEN FOR CASUAL SEX COMING FROM? The second issue here is we have always shamed men for this, we use to have laws, seduction laws where a woman could simply claim that the man they had sex with either promised or suggested they would get married and then that man would go to prison for two years while she had NO PUNISHMENT. So again, WHERE THE FUCK IS THIS COMING FROM ESPECIALLY SINCE I JUST GAVE YOU A LIST OF TEN DIFFERENT TERMS WE USE, NONE OF WHICH ARE CONSIDERED A GOOD THING, TO SHAME MEN FOR PROMISCUITY? Its like your not even listening/reading what is being stated! I mean what have I said? Do you even know? Your just ignoring literally everything stated, going off on random tangents and I have no idea what the hell your doing? You and women like you live in a make believe world, men do get shamed for sex, they also get shamed for not having sex something women never have to deal with so why aren't you up and arms about that? Where's your equality gone? Why do women get to have a free pass but men don't? Isn't that a little sexist?

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 As for the rest I don't make the rules, I don't participate in causal sex, I do not believe it is healthy, but I also don't control how biology works and just like how men have a lot more responsibilities then women have and are mistreated across the board to a greater degree then women (when your arguing that a woman has the right to be childish and a shitty person and ignore the consequences of their actions without judgment you know you don't have any legitimate problem to overcome, now your just demanding we let you act like animals.), I also acknowledge that these are biological in nature and they are out of my control. Guess what? The same goes for you, you don't have to like that your a woman or that your biologically not built to be promin, you don't have to like that your not as strong as a man, that you are not biologically built to be promiscous and it has greater consequences for you then men, I mean men are not happy that they have shorter life spans, have to provide for women constantly have to endanger themselves because women don't have to etc. and you don't here us throwing a bitch fit and claiming its sexism, but we all have to just acknowledge that this is reality and move the fuck on. You have a problem with this bitch to evolution then, I don't want to hear it (and lets be honest your not even reading this anyway your just going to comment without even listening like you have for every other interaction).

[kim45456]

I dont read that long opinions. Just get to the point. And there is difference between players and promiscuous men. Players get shamed but not promiscuous cause these kind of men play with women to get laid. So it is a valod reason. And It is the western societys fault when they shame virgin men.

[kim45456]

Still dont understand why do you or society has the need to shame on promiscuous people. as soon as they use contraceptions or any protections, they dont hurt anyone. But by pressuring people to do to something hurt them "As for your statement about men being shamed, are you serious? Philanderer, womanizer, user, fuckboy, player, manslut/manwhore, lothario, playboy, rake. Yeah, men get shamed..." you know noone of this degrade men. As if you dont know how media romantise fuckboys but shame on virgin men

[kim45456]

Some people here dont even believe that men can be sluts

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 HA HA HA HA! THe point was your not reading a thing that is written but your going to sit their and argue with me and claim I'm wrong. That was the point I made. I quite literally addressed everything you said and because your to lazy to bother reading the statements you kept arguing the very wrong point. Men are shamed for casual sex, they are shamed for every aspect of their sexuality, they are shamed for being virgins, they are shamed for not spending their life working away and giving every dime they have to women, they are shamed for not sacrificing themselves for women etc. etc. Stop being a victim and grow up. Also maybe bother to read comments or you know, don't fucking argue because your wasting MY time when you blurt out statements without bothering to read what was written, if your going to be lazy do it some where else I don't have time for you.

[kim45456]

Men are not shamed so much for for sexuality as women. Nobody call fuckboys sluts and fuckboy is literally a compliment.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 No, fuckboy is not a compliment your trying to rewrite reality. Yes you do, you are now, your acting like all men are man whores when in reality most men want relationships and don't really want to sleep around. Regardless you frame male sexuality as uncontrolled and promiscuous by its nature, that's shaming. Anyway you have proven that your not worth speaking to about this because you refuse to listen you refuse to look at things from a different perspective you refuse to even read what was written and now your making up things. Hell you even ignored the other names in the list I gave (because again, you refuse to budge from your incredibly flawed and one sided world view of victimhood. Your not a victim, your a woman, your the most privileged group in the world without exception). Also: slate.com/.../what-does-fuckboy-mean.html

[TheFlak38]

This is how Kim looks every time she posts on Gag...

[kim45456]

@hellionthesagereborn stop bring up untrue shit and where tf i say all men are whores? You know well there are still men having multiple wifes, sleepin araound and get virgin girls as wifes/ girlfriend. Men never get shamed as much as women for sleeping around. Where tf you get insulted as slut? Men with a high bodycount get congratulated for being a hoe. Even in western media promiscuous guys are hyped. Hell in turkey or other northeastern countries women are having virginity regain operation

[hellionthesagereborn]

@kim45456 Nothing I said was untrue and you know it. I never said you said all men where whores, you are suggesting it when you say that men are allowed to sleep around as if this is a common place thing, its not, and you are suggesting we reward them for the behavior and don't shame them which I proved, conclusively, was not the case. Your the one making up things your the one refusing to listen and hear people out your the one refusing to acknowledge reality (seriously womanizer and fuckboy are good things? In who's mind exactly? No ones, no one sees those terms as a positive and you know it as well as I do.). So again, your not worth speaking to any more because you refuse to listen you refuse to actually read what I wrote (I spent a lot of time writing that out and you immediately ignore it, its as disrespectful as it is stupid (your arguing but your not listening to the other person so what the fuck is your end goal? You think just spewing out the same completely false statement over and over again is going to win people over even if you don't bother to listen to them?). So have a nice day.

[Dargil]

One poster said:
"People Who've had casual sex will be less happy in marriage as they can't properly bond with their partner'
Sexist as this sounds, my unscientific perception is that men can "get their fill" and then become Mitt Romney's who UNhypocritically (!) warn their daughters against guys like they were. Women, by contrast, who gave it up easily and often dismantle their capacity to ever be faithful wives and mothers and become manipulative and predatory over time.
But it's number of partners, not number of sessions. 2 partners, 300 sessions total. No problem. 15 partners, 150 sessions total, big problem.

[myTake Owner]

I can agree with all that

[kim45456]

WE ALSO DONT LIKE MAN WHORES. GET IT?

[Dargil]

@kim45456 Them stop giving it up to them like it is a stick of chewing gum.

[MsElizabeth96]

People Who've had casual sex will be less happy in marriage as they can't properly bond with their partner

[myTake Owner]

Agreed.

[Shamalien]

somewhere there is a lucky man

[DizzyDesii]

Ig cause they consider women “hoes” for it but consider men “experienced” for it. I consider em all hoes if the numbers too high so i ain't worried 🤷‍♀️ Ill never get how someone can want to sleep with so many people. Just seems unsanitary. I feel more than a handful is too much. I personally am never going over 3 and i hate i ever went over 1

[OlderAndWiser]

1. I have met women who seemed to enjoy sex just as much as men enjoy sex. However, that fact alone does not mean hat sex is the same for women as it is for men. I think many men regard sex as a recreational activity for fun and they do not equate it with love and long term commitment. However, men who are more introspective (which has a rough correlation with being more intelligent) tend to regard sex as a concomitant of love and a stable relationship.

2. If a person senses a societal pressure to seek sex only in a long term relationship but readily violates that rule, it is an indication that the person is willing to be a social rebel. Such an attitude seems like it would dispose a person to also violate societal norms about alcohol and drugs. It is the flip side of the old expression that "if she smokes, she pokes."

3. Does living life in compliance with societal norms equate with happiness? Is it reasonable to rely on someone's self-report of happiness to determine that fewer sexual partners means a woman is happier with her life?

[englisc]

Men and women are different. As much as the women here are trying to pin the blame for this on insecure sexist men, as per usual, there's more to it.

A person asks another person for just sex. The other person enthusiastically says yes.
A person asks another person for just sex. The other person calls that person an asshole.
A person lies to another person and pretends to want a serious relationship with that person, when really they only want casual sex. Then they leave the other person, and the other person is heartbroken because they only have sex with people they feel emotionally connected to.

You already know who the girls and guys are most likely to be in either situation because you know that when it comes to sex men and women think and act completely differently most of the time. Sure there are some outliers, and these things do happen to either gender sometimes, but in each case unless you're being dishonest you know how this usually happens.

People today are obsessed with equality in absolutely everything. They want to pretend that men and women are the same. That's why the explanation is almost always something to do with society or "insecure men" and not just our nature. That's also why they'll ignore any evidence that contradicts their message while they do mental gymnastics to try to explain it in a way that doesn't.

[kim45456]

Yes, women and men are not same but dont fuckimg justify that men can be whores. Can you explain me what has that to do with slutshaming women but not men?

[kim45456]

You are just proving you are jelous of women having the power to have sex

[englisc]

@kim45456 Well slut-shaming is for a different reason, and comes from the past when our culture was more Christian. This idea that there was a time when men would go around having sex with loads of women, "sow their wild oats" and then marry a virgin is really inaccurate. At that time most people were virgins, and they had to marry in order to have sex. What slut-shaming was really about was paternity. In the past of course they didn't have birth control, so there was always a high risk of pregnancy along with sex. They also didn't have DNA tests. Therefore the only way a man could be sure that the children were his would be if she was a virgin. So there were all of these social pressures put in place to prevent women from having casual or pre-marital sex and also huge stigma around having children out of wedlock. Slut-shaming today really comes from that time. And since most women would avoid that because of the huge stigma, it would be impossible for most men to sleep around the way they do today because they couldn't find women willing to do that. None of this is about justifying men being "whores", it's just an analysis of the differences between men and women. I don't think that sleeping around is a good thing for anybody, but it definitely has more of a negative effect on women for these reasons. As for the accusation of being jealous of women having the power - that's laughable, and it's also a projection of your own insecurities. You'd like that to be the case but you know that it isn't, that's why you whine a lot about men not wanting older women.

[kim45456]

Hahaha ok i sorry then. I though you a hypergamy asshole. I dont have a problem if a virgin MSN want a virgin woman but hate it that promiscuous men expectin less experienced women

[kim45456]

Hahaha ok i am sorry then. I thought you a hypercritical asshole. I dont have a problem if a virgin man want a virgin woman but hate it that promiscuous men expecting less experienced women**

[SarahsSummer]

Because insecure men.

[SueAnon84]

Exactly! Men (especially the ones on here and the one who wrote this question) are always (if not usually) looking for excuses to degrade women! To insult and offend them! They don't want to admit that we are equal but in different ways!

[mistixs]

It's bad for both women and men. Men need to keep their legs closed too

[vivmatt]

I feel like this might be true, but from a different angle. You're first and only sex partner can never do wrong in bed because you have nothing else to compare it to. You don't know what you like and don't like yet so you assume "ah THIS is what sex is". However after having a few partners, I've realized that men hardly focus on a womans orgasm. Not until my recent boyfriend did a guy ever make me cum. But now he's getting lazy and I don't want to settle for the one sided sex I've had in the past. Needless to say, having great sex once and bad sex a whole bunch of times, makes you really picky. Which might be a bad thing. I could've been blindly happy with one sided sex if I had stuck with my first partner because I wouldn't have known any better

[Jersey2]

I think you are on to something with this. I also think women not only become picky with sex but less loving with one man as they see him as easily replaceable once other expectations are not fully met as it is easy to find a (temporary) mate for her. She does lose innocence and becomes more cold and ridged which is not alluring, warm of feminine which has the affect of keeping her from then getting a stable long term mate.

[vivmatt]

Lol actually my point was men don't really care about a women enjoying herself so she can either settle with bad sex or trying finding a guy that will get her off. A guy giving in sex, however, is difficult to find and often leads down roads of disappointment and resentment in women. Thus, women "want less sex"

[Jersey2]

And I am saying that it begins to affect her in other ways as well. Biologically, men have to get off first so that he impregnates her. If you want a guy to give you better sex it is best to help teach him as we do suck at it in general. Once we orgasm nature also releases chemicals to make us sleepy and tired so that we stay with the woman and it allows for bonding time which increases the chances of the newborn having two parents around. I get off, I get tired and sleep. All is good unless you help make them understand how to have better sex. Young men don’t get it. It’s easier to teach them a bit than find one that hits all the points for you in a mate.

[vivmatt]

I completely agree. But if a girl doesn't have prior experience in sex, how will she know what she likes and doesn't like? I can only communicate my preferences because I have experience with multiple past partners.

[Jersey2]

I think as they know each other longer, she will let him know what works either by saying it (as she trusts him after a period of time) or she simply moans at the right time to give him the reinforcement he needs to understand what works and what doesn’t. The old adage, communication is very important for couples.

[BlacklightShade]

I prefer formal sex over casual sex.

[SydneySentinel]

I'll start by saying that I don't engage in casual sex but that's my personal choice and those that do are free to make their own decisions for themselves. (And I've struggled with both anxiety and depression in my life.)

I hate statistical data. "This percent of people SURVEYED" does not equate to every person in the world. Why? Who is doing the surveys for this data? More likely unhappy people because the happy ones are living the good life and not worried about reporting their sex to happiness ratio on a sex inventory. (Aside from on Gag, has anyone you know ACTUALLY completed a "sex survey" for clinical research?) Let's also consider the percentage of outliers in a set of data that's conducted on everyone in the world who is having sex.

"I personally don't like the idea of my woman being with many men before me because... she will always be remembering back to her previous experiences even if she doesn't want to."
If after sexual assault I can engage in a healthy sexual relationship (within a relationship) and not recall that, I think it's safe to say that NOT everyone is thinking about their previous experiences. And what of men who may be recalling their experiences from their sexual past because they've engaged in casual sex?

"... my woman to be MY own and special in that way..." Do you not think women want this of their man as well? I certainly don't want to be "next in line" to have him but it's still a double standard that men have casual sex while women don't.

I think casual sex can be detrimental to any person who wants a longterm relationship/marriage, not just women.

[bamesjond0069]

Actually i have been part of sex research and in college I've done my own studies and they were not on this exact thing but something similar that id say coincided with these results. And we know in class that sex positive people complete sex surveys and other people do not so we actually were allowed to compel a portion of the student body to answer to get results from our schools student body. We only studied that small group however the meta analysis of all studies related to ours plus some of these plus others all start to paint a single picture when they all coincide.

[RoyalDaxer]

Im not trying to be a jerk but lets consider it like this , Women are Locks and Men are keys

A key that opens many locks is a master key,

A lock that is opened by many keys is a shitty lock

[kim45456]

And novody want a lollipop which is sucked by everyone

[RoyalDaxer]

I was meaning, thats the mentality of it for a lot of people

[kim45456]

As if? That is surely a joke for most people?

[RoyalDaxer]

You would be surprised , a lot of the people in general think like that

[CubsterShura]

I believe it is because of our natural instincts. Pregnancy is a huge risk for a woman (this is why we have periods, to shed off what might potentially not result in a healthy offspring). This is why women are also wired to have sex with a man who has her back and she can trust him and have an emotional attachment. Casual sex lacks that part that's why women feel lack of fulfillment if they have too many sexual partners. I firmly believe lack of fulfillment leads to depression. Happiness and fulfillment aren't the same time, by the way. We have birth control to prevent pregnancy, but we have hardly any control over our natural instincts.

[kim45456]

Women are hypergamy by nature.

[CubsterShura]

@kim45456 nope

[kim45456]

Yes they are

[kim45456]

Your natural instinct getting pregnant by the best quality man. Thst is only 10% of the make population and the rest is not needed

[CubsterShura]

Going from one man to another constantly can ruin stability in life. That's not natural to a woman's instincts.

[kim45456]

It is also not nstural that 90% of the male Population live although we need only 10% of men who give us the the best quality of gens

[kim45456]

Do you think it is ok that men can sleep around?

[CubsterShura]

I don't think it is okay for anyone to be sleeping around.

[zaharaa]

damn this one really hit me home 😵

[KobeBeanBryant]

I can see why. 🤣

[zaharaa]

just to reply to the mytake, I feel like it's sort of right, it seems like it has no affect on guys compared to girls for some reason

[myTake Owner]

@zaharaa Well, to be honest, it does have an effect on men, it’s just the effects are more pronounced for women. Also, some phenomenon exists on the women’s side that do not exist on the men’s and vice versa.

[zaharaa]

I see, thanks for informing me

[myTake Owner]

If I can my personal opinion on this further. I personally would not like to date a woman who has had many intimate/sexual partners. Now, I will say that I am open to such a thing, but there would have to be certain specifics. The reason why I’m not into women who are like this is because I do not feel her history will allow for a very intimate, special, or loving relationship for me. I personally don’t like the idea of my woman being with many men before me because that might influence how we bond in the future, where she will always be remembering or thinking back to her previous experiences even if she doesn’t want to. I don’t care too much for being compared to other men, but I want my relationship or bond with my woman to be MY own and special that way, if that makes sense. If my woman has been with many men, it just doesn’t feel unique or special anymore to me. It feels like I’m finally the person next in line to “have” her and she’ll most likely see me as that as well subconsciously. I hoped I explained that okay or sufficiently. @KobeBeanBryant What’s your take on this brother?

[zaharaa]

I guess that makes sense and a lot of guys think similar to you which is fine but it just sucks that I put myself at a disadvantage without realizing it

[KobeBeanBryant]

nah I agree with you pimp, I ain't bout to marry a girl that been with a bunch of guys because those girls are good for the team but not one on one for a long time, at least in my experiences. so yeah I agree with you

[zaharaa]

@KobeBeanBryant omg shut up, dm me

[myTake Owner]

@zaharaa Well, if I can be sympathetic and optimistic here, I don’t know what your past looks like nor do I know what events or situations caused it. We all make mistakes and we shouldn’t have to pay for them perpetually. If you’ve understood the mistakes you’ve made and corrected them or have taken the steps/the right direction to correct them, then you shouldn’t have to worry about your past and most likely more men will through it to the wayside. Now, if you enjoy doing what you’re doing, whether that be a lot of sexual sex, hookups, etc. then no one can stop and should be able to stop you. Even though I strongly advise against it, it doesn’t feel right for anyone to force you to stop. A lot of men who just want to have sex, won’t obviously care about a woman’s past. For me though, I don’t just want sex. I actually want to LOVE a woman to my core, give it my all. I want her to be mine in a sense and vice versa. I don’t want to share her or whatever. I want for it to be me and her, duo or partnership, against everything else. Sounds cliche, cheesy, and maybe unrealistic, but that’s my belief.

[zaharaa]

no I think your beliefs are fine and I do wish to better myself so I'll try working in a better direction

[myTake Owner]

@KobeBeanBryant Lmfao yes my man. You wouldn’t mind hooking up with a promiscuous woman, especially if she’s all over you, but that’s unrelated to anything long term, such as marriage. It’s funny how men make such a distinction between these two categories of women. I wonder if women do the same? I personally think not, but I could be wrong

[KobeBeanBryant]

@EmbraceThePain you got that right dawg and females never really care from what it seems lmao

[myTake Owner]

@zaharaa That’s really good to hear, I’m honestly glad. I’m positive you’re a good person, but you’ve just made mistakes that you didn’t know what their residual effects would be until now. I’m genuinely saying this because I think you can seriously become happier in your relationships or with yourself going forward. Take what I’ve written to heart and see what you can do with it, if you want of course.

[myTake Owner]

@KobeBeanBryant Yeah, some don’t for sure, but I actually think more do but the media might make us believe otherwise.

[zaharaa]

I really dont care about how many girls a guy has slept with, if that helps you guys with anything lol

[KobeBeanBryant]

@zahara well of course you dont 🤣 nah I'm just playing

[zaharaa]

@KobeBeanBryant imma slap you next time I see you lmao

[kim45456]

@EmbraceThePain if you are male whore, go marry someone like you

[kim45456]

@KobeBeanByrant another male whore

[KobeBeanBryant]

@kin45456 She knows I'm playing with her, back up off me lmao

[Avicenna]

A guy being promiscuous is also viewed negatively by MOST women since it's assumed he won't be a loyal partner.

[Grande_Beefy_Swirl]

Because sex and non-monogamy are still denigrated as impure and vile by most of American society.

As someone who's very happy in my own long-term non-monogamous relationship i have to say: if people would have been more supportive in my earlier relationships i might not have made so many mistakes.

[Robertcw]

I've said it already hut this is wrong. It's due to hypergamy. Men get jealous because in a world with casual sex totally a laize-fair market, the median number of all men alive would never get laid.

[Grande_Beefy_Swirl]

You clearly don't know a lot about women if you think that's true. There's all kinds of women out there, a lot of whom can't get laid. There's plenty of older women, plus sized women, disabled women, or just unconventionally attractive women who feel like they aren't good enough to even TRY getting a partner. a lot of women in those situations get taken advantage of by fetishists and that can turn them off to dating all-together. but most guys aren't talking about any of them when they say they aren't getting laid. Most guys who complain about sex as a 'laize-fair market' don't take into consideration the HUGE amount of girls out there who might be incredibly lonely but aren't quite attractive enough to be a viable option. If you think there's a large pool of men who can't get a date you're right. There's a lot of lonely men AND women out there. People are lonely in general but it's hard to trust people and Americans aren't typically very emotionally literate. We aren't taught how to appropriately handle emotional issues so we develop a lot of bad habits and coping mechanisms. We might lose self-awareness and become obnoxious or unpalatable, which DOESN'T help with dating. Both men AND women suffer because of this. Dating NEEDS to be an open market. There's literally no alternative that isn't fascistic. Dating isn't a fair game, but if you have the mental capability of forming coherent sentences then I'm 99.9% positive you'll get laid at some point in your life. Now, the ability to speak is only as good as the thoughts that come out of that speech. If you're an annoying asshole that's entirely on you to try and gain some awareness. TLDR: you can't regulate how people date each other so open yourself up to fat old women and stop being annoying.

[Robertcw]

I wasn't referring to myself but thanks for your lack of faith in me. 😒🤪 I think what I said applies to hookups and bar girls. Relationships are a completely different ball game.

[Robertcw]

Which makes sense because slut shaming refers to casual sex partners, not divorcees or serious long term + commitment partner counts. For example: a girl who cheats on her husband might be slut shammed. But a girl who's been married three times but also didn't sleep around would not get slut shamed.

[kim45456]

@Ropertcw so what you man whore

[ronaldo75]

@grande_beefy_swirl you talk a LOT of shit for someone who clearly has little life experience and really doesn't know what's out there. "Long-term nonmonogamous relationship?" you're in a long term open relationship at 21 years old? Long term is considered after 5 years. You've been with a partner since you were 16? "Made so many mistakes"... so many? How many relationships were you in before 16? Or are you lying about all this shit? Are you lying about being 21?

[kim45456]

@ronaldo75 why you guys just find someone like you. If you sleep around, then you deserve a promiscuous womsn

[jcclifton]

Because Weman are emotionally involved.

[Robertcw]

imagine you grew up in poverty in an undeveloped country and you thought that having shoes would be life-changing.

Meanwhile it is normal to wear shoes in a developed country and nobody thinks about it.

That's your answer.

You would simultaneously desperately want to be one of the people on the first world who has shoes and other things, but you would also hate them because they have the one thing you want and they have it easily and take it for-granted. This, you shoe-shame them for being ungrateful shoe havers.

Same exact concept.

[Grande_Beefy_Swirl]

Starving kids in Ghana don't hate Americans. Most of them don't even know what America is. This is such a weird argument.

[Robertcw]

@Grande_Beefy_Swirl It's not really weird. Imagine something else if you want, such as the hatred of rich people. Take our current presidential election for example. Bernie Sanders wants to 'take on the billionaires.' 'You cannot have it all' is the slogan he uses. Same exact thing. You could call this 'rich shaming' or 'wealth shaming.' It's no different than the feeling of 'keeping up with the joneses.' Or feeling jealous or depressed at someone else's social media accounts if they're loves appear more happy or impressive than your own.

[kim45456]

So men should stop being incesure then?

[Robertcw]

@kim45456 Gotta elaborate a little more. I'm a little autistic so you gotta spell it out a little more literally.

[latinabutterfly96]

Because society still doesn’t like women who do it. And what society says inevitably affects our perceptions and feelings. That’s literally why. It’s not because men were made to fuck 100 women and women were made to only sleep with 1 dude. If anyone claims it’s more ok for men to sleep with lots of people then they’re either very ignorant or just plain sexist.

[Naydyonov]

Men are meant to pass on their seed to as many women as possible (thus reloading on a daily) and women are meant to be impregnated by the highest quality man and have that man or another provide provisions and safety (thus having no more than one child in 9 months). Socially is another question.

[latinabutterfly96]

@Naydyonov Oh shut up

[Naydyonov]

You can deny biology if you wish. Or you accept the difference between sexes but advocate for men and women to remain in monogamous and healthy relationships.

[latinabutterfly96]

I’m not denying biology. Here’s where you’re getting confused: Sex and pro creation go hand in hand, but they’re still different things. Sex is a pleasurable act that may lead to offspring (reproduction!) The clitoris (just like a penis) LIKES sexual pleasure. The clitoris doesn’t give a single fuck if the woman is already pregnant. In fact, a pregnant woman has more sexual desire than a non-pregnant woman. Pregnant women have sex even if they’re pregnant. Get it?

[latinabutterfly96]

You’re acting like sex *always* leads to offspring and it doesn’t. Not only that, but being pregnant doesn’t block a woman from fucking other guys too. In open marriages this happens and it’s fine if the wife and husband consent to it.

[kim45456]

"You can deny biology if you wish. Or you accept the difference between sexes but advocate for men and women to remain in monogamous and healthy relationships." Yes women should be impregnanted by highest quality men which is only lile 10% of male population and the rest like you is unnecassary and shouls die

[latinabutterfly96]

@kim45456 LMAO

[Naydyonov]

Yes of course women like sex as much as men. But the question is if it is more damaging. For men sex and emotions can remain completely separate. For women this is mostly not the case. In addition men and women have different mating strategies. To uphold civilization male sexuality was repressed and replaced with the strategy that worked better to create stability for women: monogamy. This ensured the woman and the child would be fed and safe. This also ensured the child would grow up to be a normal human being. Even if we assume women and men react to their own sexual experiences the same — neutrally, men do not want to settle with a promiscuous woman. So by having a high partner count a woman automatically eliminates a large percentage of the mating pool. This is natural. No man wants to father another man's child. So it is ingrained in men to fuck whomever but settle down only with 'clean' women. Do I believe it is okay for men to sleep with tons of women? — No. I think both sexes should strive to have: 1) a long-term relationship; or 2) casual sex with one person (for example: meeting up and fucking for perhaps a year then going their separate ways).

[kim45456]

Yeah but by biology 90% of men should die because they dont have the highest quality. Why dont you die then? We are civilized and are not animals more. Does not matter, if men dont like promiscuos women. Women also think that only 20 petcent of male population are attractive to them. Why do you all get pissed when women want the richtest, most handsome, strongest, tallest men? Thst is their biology but we still can date uglier men and csn control our instincs.

[Naydyonov]

@kim45456 "Why dont you die then? We are civilized and are not animals more." Nope. The 20th century showed that people are capable of the same cruelties that were done thousands of years prior. Civilization created a safety net, giving men a reason not to be so violent (access to women) and women to safely raise children (financial support from the church, government and husband + the army keeping her safe). "Why do you all get pissed when women want the richtest, most handsome, strongest, tallest men?" Did I get pissed? No, if a woman wants to be the seventh wife of a rich guy then she could do so. Though on a societal level it will mean more rapes and other violent acts. " biology 90% of men should die because they dont have the highest quality" Biology doesn't say men SHOULD die. It just makes them more disposable. Men are more disposable but better at surviving, women are higher value because they give birth to offspring but are also incapable of surviving alone. The only thing which makes a woman biologically more valuable is that she can bear children. If women nowadays don't want children then they become equal to men, meaning the same rules of disposability apply. For example: conscription.

[kim45456]

"Did I get pissed? No, if a woman wants to be the seventh wife of a rich guy then she could do so. Though on a societal level it will mean more rapes and other violent acts. " more rapes? Just because you can't control yourself? "Biology doesn't say men SHOULD die. It just makes them more disposable. Men are more disposable but better at surviving, women are higher value because they give birth to offspring but are also incapable of surviving alone." No, in the nature male species fight each other till msny of them die and only few can have many female partners "The only thing which makes a woman biologically more valuable is that she can bear children. If women nowadays don't want children then they become equal to men, meaning the same rules of disposability apply. " so you guys are jelous of us and therefore jelous of us for getting laid easily

[Naydyonov]

@kim45456 Lack of sex makes men and women alike become crazier. Yeah. Sex is non-lethal basic need. A man can survive without sex physically, but often a man without sex becomes like a man without food. He is ready to eat whatever he can. Porn does subdue this. But the guys who have less self control are the ones who often start doing bad things. "so you guys are jelous of us and therefore jelous of us for getting laid easily" How is that related to being disposable? Women can easily get laid because men are meant to spread their seed. This means women have historically been left with the consequences: pregnancy and often death. However societies and countries were created where a friendly environment for procreation was created. If say 40% of women don't wish to be mothers now, then they lose their biological value and ( considering military technology allowing less physically fit people to fight) become the best group to expend on the battlefield (trading more loss of quantity to retain quality). The abundant men would just need access to prostitutes, doing physical and intellectual work do make the money to pay for her. A man's primary role is to protect and provide (building and sustaining). A woman's primary role is bear children and care for children. A man could have been infertile throughout history and still do dozens of things which greatly benefit ed his society. An infertile woman only became of more societal use when people settled on farms and people started becoming specialists of specific crafts.

[kim45456]

Thanks to technology we can replace "the strength of men" We need brain and not someones strengh anymore and if a MSN have rapey fantasies, he should go to doctors. By your logic all monks are potential rapists. I also have fantizes about murdering people but i csn control myself.

[kim45456]

And i believe in evolution. Men are that strong thanks to their evolutional role. As you know men were one who hunt and women were the one who care about kids and can't hunt or fight due to her pregnancy. If women keep on doing typical man jobs and if our technology develops, we are going to get physivsl strong women like men in like few 1000 years.

[Naydyonov]

@kim45456 It's not about fantasies. It's about losing the ability to control impulses. Like a kid who eats three packs of chips every day. They lose the desire to control themselves. These men who must resort to violence to attain women do so because they either believe or genuinely do not have another way to access women. Technology, created by men, can replace everybody to an extent. Men however upkeep the whole system. Assume a country like Spain gets rid of 80% of its men. Other than economic collapse Spain would lie open to the rest of the world. Any foreign power would be able to take over it. Men in Africa would have all the more reason to come to Spain and take over, taking the women and girls for themselves. Why go to Germany when there are now millions of defenseless and young women?

[Naydyonov]

@kim45456 Yes that is true. Both sexes will degrade physically to an equal level of strength.

[kim45456]

In most jobs we need brain which women have, not physical strengh. Yes, men do al lot for the civilization but that is because were kept women at home. So theycant get get education and were not allowed to use their brains. There are still a lot women who are not allowed to get education. Men have power over women due to their strengh. But if society keep on being like that, we are going to get physical strong women in the future and that is not a fantasy, that is evolution.

[Naydyonov]

@kim45456 How are women going to become stronger? Doctors, reporters, teachers: these jobs require no physical strength. Working on the farm did require strength. The reason why women were left at home was because a woman's main responsibility was raising children. No civilization could come out on top without having the human resources to do so. Right now, without immigration from less developed countries, the west would face population decline and eventual loss of all its power. There would be less workers, a higher economic burden on the average worker to support pensioners and a smaller and smaller pool of manpower for national defense. This is why the native population (English and French) in Canada is falling. The native population is falling in villages due to emigration and natural deaths; in cities like Toronto it is falling because more are dying than are being born — despite the influx of other native peoples into the city. The only thing which is keeping this problem from being visible is the fact that in other countries women are still giving birth to 3-6 children or there are just so many people in that country that even a little immigration from there is enough (like Chinese coming to Canada).

[kim45456]

If women work in fields, where physical strengh is needed, we can mske women stronger. And what do you mean by women getting more kids in other countries? Should we forced women give birth and have a lot kids?

[Naydyonov]

@kim45456 No, women should not be forced. I believe the media should stop encouraging women to act like men. Women are not men. The emotional and physical effect of sex for women is different. It is equally to a woman's benefit to have sex with a man she knows will support her in case she becomes pregnant. This doesn't mean they will marry. Simply that he isn't trash that will jump ship without trying to come to a solution that best fits the situation. I simply believe women should not shy away from having children. If a woman values a family over a career, why tell her she should reverse her priorities? Let women decide want they want, but as women. As women physically and mentally. I do not believe women or men can find happiness in casual sex with numerous partners. The way I see it, it is just worse for women. Women can physically have hundreds of partners if they wish, but they lose their femininity in the process. They lose one of the top qualities of a woman: innocence. Their promiscuity also makes them less attractive for men. As said men don't want to father another child. But men also want to know their woman is theirs. There is a reason men look down on cucks. Men whose women gives themselves away to strangers lose respect for themselves. Because a man needs to feel his woman's love and submission to him; emotional and physical. The same way a woman needs to a man to make her feel emotionally and physically safe. Casual sex provides none of these things to either a man or a woman. However casual sex does do one thing that it doesn't do for women: it allows the man to spread his seed across many women to ensure his genes are passed on. Is this actually a useful thing though? I would say no. The man leaves his child to grow up in a shitty environment. He also misses out on creating a connection with the child. So is casual sex more damaging to women? I would say yes. It is damaging to men: in many ways I would say so.

[kim45456]

So you like women being innocent, stupid, naive? How is that feminine? Let women be adults

[Naydyonov]

Nope, did not say that. Women are adults. If they want to ruin their lives I am not going to stand in their way. But I will also not pay taxes to support social schemes to support their stupid decisions. Want to become a single mom? Get an abortion? Well don't vote for me to pay for it.

[latinabutterfly96]

@Naydyonov We are disagreeing with you because it’s not true. If it were true we wouldn’t be defending our opinion so fucking much. I can 100% separate emotions from sex, and casual sex is not at all damaging to me or any woman I know. It might be more damaging to some men and women, but not “mostly”. You think your opinions are fact but they aren’t. Re-read what I said above because you clearly don’t know much about biology.

[Naydyonov]

Great, let's assume women, including you, have no problems with casual sex. Then don't vote for tax payer funded abortions and for government support of single parents. Encourage your friends to do likewise. Otherwise you are arguing that casual sex is not bad, but voting for people like me to pay money to support the bad consequences of your decisions. If you don't want a person like me to dictate your actions, don't involve me in their consequences. That means: if you have 50 partners then lie about it; if you want an abortion; the father of the bastard (descriptive) is absent. Then the positive and negative consequences will be entirely yours. You enjoyed the casual sex? — Great. Don't involve me.

[latinabutterfly96]

@Naydyonov Okay? Why are you so mad that women are okay with casual sex? Do you want them to suffer then?

[latinabutterfly96]

@Naydyonov You’re a pretty strange guy

[latinabutterfly96]

Pregnancy is a possibility, not a consequence. A woman has the right to have casual sex because she ENJOYS it, and a woman also has a right to abortion because guess what? It’s her freaking body. Your toxic mentality amazes me. You only want to control women and act all superior. You’re sad.

[Naydyonov]

I may be a strange guy but it has nothing to do with wanting suffering. I used to believe it was okay for people to have casual sex. Then my stance changed. I think it's definitely okay to see someone just for sex. But having 15 partners by age 20 for me is just something. It tells me the following are likely: #1: The person is impulsive. #2: Affection is no guarantee that this person actually likes me. #3: This person is a risk taker. #4: This person values the short term over the long term. Same reason I stay away from drug users and drinkers. Name me a benefit of drinking other than short term enjoyment. If I wanted to do women harm then I would go against my beliefs and encourage women to sleep with any and all. Why? Because it would increase the chance of me being the one fucking them by that much more. However I have become accustomed to doing things on my own, so there is no need for me to encourage what I believe is bad behavior for my personal benefit. If there is a girl I don't want a relationship with but am attracted to, then I'll just have to tell exactly that. That we can fulfill our sexual needs with one another, but as soon as one of us no longer wishes to continue it stops there. Equally it is an exclusive sexual relationship. I won't have sex with her if she is seeing other guys. I set my terms, she sets hers. It would be casual but it would also be a scenario in which I know her, she knows me, there is mutual trust and communication. It allows the establishment of safe boundaries for all involved. Is that anti-woman? Well fuck me if it ain't.

[latinabutterfly96]

Hold on buddy, when did we start talking about promiscuity? There’s a huge difference between casual sex and promiscuous behavior. You seem very confused.

[latinabutterfly96]

If you wanna talk about promiscuity, then I would never date a promiscuous guy because I agree that he probably has a lot of unhealthy behaviors. Having casual sex is not the same thing, bud.

[Naydyonov]

"Casual sex is sexual activity that takes places outside a romantic relationship and implies an absence of commitment, emotional attachment, or familiarity between sexual partners. Examples are sexual activity while casually dating, one-night stands, premarital sex, prostitution, or swinging." Go ahead and explain the big difference. Note, I have discussed casual sex negatively in the context of numerous occurrences; with many partners.

[latinabutterfly96]

Sure! The big difference between casual sex and promiscuity is that promiscuity is about quantity. Casual sex is simply indiscriminate, but isn’t necessarily done with lots of people. I can have casual sex with a guy right now and that wouldn’t make me promiscuous. Get it?

[latinabutterfly96]

A promiscuous person has a high body count. But someone who simply fucked that hot guy she saw at the bar is not necessarily someone who is promiscuous.

[latinabutterfly96]

PROMISCUOUS: having or characterized by many transient sexual relationships. CASUAL SEX: sexual activity between people who are not established sexual partners or do not know each other well. A person can indeed be both, but not necessarily.

[latinabutterfly96]

Plus, people lie about their high body count. So don’t expect the woman to tell you “Hey man, I have fucked 76 guys. I hope you still find me cute!” You wouldn’t know.

[Naydyonov]

I wouldn't know because women know that being promiscuous is bad? : ) So again, noting what I said: casual sex with numerous partners. If you have sex with the guy at the bar once or you have sex with 15 guys at the bar, there is a definitely a difference. Casual as it is, it is promiscuous. "I can have casual sex with a guy right now and that wouldn’t make me promiscuous. Get it?" Exactly what I referred to, oh, well, seven times.

[latinabutterfly96]

No. You were telling me that promiscuity was the same thing as casual sex. It is not. Nuff said.

[Naydyonov]

Nope. I said multiple times about casual sex with multiple partners. If your argument is inventing what I said then okay.

[latinabutterfly96]

@Naydyonov I'll quote you. LOL. I said casual sex and promiscuity is not the same thing. You: "Go ahead and explain the big difference" I explained it. Then you started throwing bullshit excuses. Which means you know you're wrong, but your big ass ego can't admit it.

[latinabutterfly96]

@Naydyonov You wouldn't know because it's private information. It's their business, not yours.

[Naydyonov]

Okay jesus christ. I'm referring to casual sex with many partners and promiscuity. If I said I have a big problem with casual sex then I take that back. But I don't take back saying anything about casual sex with many partners. To me promiscuity and casual sex with many partners is the same. Thus my question about the difference. "You wouldn't know because it's private information. It's their business, not yours." Actually it would be my business if they are lying about information that is pertinent to me. Same way if her requirement is that the man who she has sex with loves her and I were to lie about loving her to have sex with her, it would be a shitty move. By the same logic if I have an STD it's my business —she doesn't need to know about my private medical information. If I don't want kids and she does — she doesn't need to know about my private life plans. If I am a Nazi and she isn't — she doesn't need to know about my private opinions. But I do believe that a person has the right to demand the information necessary for them from a person. Don't want to answer? Okay. That's at least indicative. But lying is a shitty way of building the foundation for a relationship. Would I date a girl who has had 15 partners at age 20? No. Same way I refuse to date Commies and Nazis: both of whose followers have killed my relatives. For me there are principle questions. I can't date a commie because I know the threat of their dreams coming true once more are so great that I would support the use of force to quell such attempts. How would I be able to protect my family and fight what I view as evil if one of the followers is in my family unit?

[Naydyonov]

I know this may sound ridiculous to you, but my relatives lived in a country that did evil things, destroying the lives of dozens of millions of people, all in the name of communism. I cannot date a person who believes this ideology must be reinstated. Having knowledge about a girl is not limited to her promiscuity. It has a lot to do with her beliefs, goals, and behavior. It is worse to find out she was lying and had behavior I don't agree with than that she was honest about her behavior.

[Wowgirl30q]

What the heck are you talking about?

[genericname85]

is it? have you tried fucking around a lot and then finding a long term relationship?

[Adrian2306]

because men have to work for every opened hole on the belt... girls just have to say "yes"

[kim45456]

Still nobody like man whores

[Adrian2306]

nobody likes whores in general

[_uck_uckGoose]

I’ve only had one partner so far but I believe casual sex would be weird for me. I’d get weird about sharing myself in that way with just any man.