Why is it fine for a woman to refuse anal sex?

but if a guy refuses to give oral sex then he's seen as selfish, immature, bad in bed, doesn't know how to please a woman, etc... Nobody says these things to a woman who refuses to even try anal sex. Is this a double standard?

Why is it fine for a woman to refuse anal sex?
Either way they're both refusing to do something that would please their partner but people don't make nearly as big of a deal out of a woman refusing anal vs a guy refusing oral. Isn't the woman being just as immature and selfish as the guy who refuses to do oral? She's refusing to do something that he really wants.
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Most Helpful Guys

  • I really didn't want to touch this one, but I will. They are not the same thing, this is true of most of the comments, but as the author wrote, it's about getting something you want that the partner seems unwilling to give. You really can't compare apples to oranges like you're doing. Anal is not oral and vice versa, but if you're so willing to accept the opinion of others, which really doesn't matter in the long run for what you do in the bedroom, in your own spare time, I wonder why you brought up anal in the first place. The majority of people are against it, so...

    Anyway, talk it out with your partner and come to a happy medium. If not, move on to someone who can satisfy you. Dont trivialize anal sex or try to make it something its not.

    I just wish the girls would stop with the "it's my body"defense for everything. It is true that its your body, but if you're unwilling to be open minded about your partner's needs, that is selfish. And, it is a double standard when a girl will put her own sexual needs above her man's, but, primarily with anal, a lot of girls are against it. However, because of the danger accompanied with anal, I tend to agree. If a woman doesn't want her exit turned into a two way, its her right to refuse, just as if you wanted to take molly while sexing each other up and the one partner refused to remain drug free. (Which was a scenario in my real life when I was younger)

    There are medical issues at play. But if you TRULY want it, move on to someone else who will give it.

  • Health reasons. Mho?

Most Helpful Girls

  • I would say it's because anal and oral are two VERY different things. Oral isn't going to leave bloody fissures inside one of the most intimate and unhygienic parts of your whole body. Oral isn't going to be physically painful for a man like anal would no doubt hurt a woman. With that said however, I think it's perfectly fine for a person to refuse performing oral, and likewise I think it's perfectly fine for a person to refuse doing anal. You aren't required to do anything you're not comfortable with in a sexual environment where consent hails as the single most important and most necessary aspect.

    • A woman must risk bloody fissures to please her man

    • Not painful for an man? Are you an man?

    • @LanaTrix Are you seriously trying to tell me that going down on a woman is going to be incredibly physically painful for a man to do?

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  • So... you're actually trolling now.. not even trying to sound genuine anymore... How nice for you...
    It would be a double standard if it was oral vs. oral...
    It would also be a double standard if he wanted anal, but he didn't want for his girlfriend to penetrate him with an object...

    So... sounds awesome, doesn't it?

    • Not trolling. Either way they're both refusing to do something their partner wants but people don't make as big of a deal out of women refusing anal vs a guy refusing to give oral. "It would also be a double standard if he wanted anal, but he didn't want for his girlfriend to penetrate him with an object..." No. The guy has the penis and is supposed to do the penetrating and women get penetrated

    • But by the logic - anus is only for exits... so no... it's not natural... nor normal. I stand by what I wrote - if you aren't willing to be anally penetrated... don't expect her to be.

    • @LittleSally i believe you deserve mho because of the point you made, but im not sure this pink dog feels the same.

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  • Anal sex is painful, not particularly pleasurable for a lot of women, kind of gross and has a high chance of bleeding/injury if done wrong. I don’t think it’s wrong for men to refuse oral sex, unless of course they just refuse to reciprocate, but anal sex is in another ball park.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Anal and oral aren't the same thing... A better comparison would be if a woman refused to give oral lol.

    Not everyone likes having something penetrate their butthole. If a guy tried making me feel guilty for not wanting anal, I wouldn't be able to take him seriously unless he tried it himself (with a dildo, not a man). Just so he can remember exactly what he's asking of me.

  • Obviously with the results you can see here not all that many think much of anal sex.
    Find yourself a guy with a nice 7 inch very thick dick and have him stick that up your ass. Let us know how you enjoyed it.

  • It's not the same thing. Women have always been willing to give blowjobs to please their men. Same goes for men who care about pleasing their women. Anal is more painful than pleasurable, which I highly doubt is at all.

  • Anal and oral are way different, it would be better to compare a man who doesn't give oral to a woman who doesn't give oral, most men won't let their partner stick a dildo up their ass either.

  • Question: "Why is it fine to be entitled?"
    Answer: "It's not"
    Also anal can be a very painful experience. Oral normally isn't

  • The equivalent of men refusing oral is women refusing oral, and the equivalent of women refusing anal is men refusing anal

  • A guy is only selfish if he refuses oral but expects oral. Why do some guys refuse to let us peg them but want anal from us? That's a double standard.

    • Not really. Women are supposed to get penetrated. The guy has the penis and is the one who does the penetrating

    • @CT_CD yes but you see, women aren't supposed to be penetrated in the asshole, men on the other hand can get pleasure from being penetrated anally.

    • @Gianna17 If a woman's butthole wasn't designed to be penetrated then why is it so close to the vagina?

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  • I'd say that if the man is willing to do anal, meaning letting the girl take a strap-on or a dildo and shove it up his ass, then there would be a problem if the woman was fine doing that, but not taking any herself. Same if she demanded oral, but wouldn't be willing to give blowjobs. And if it is a persistant issue, then the couple should talk about it like adults and see if they can come to an agreement and if not, they should start thinking if the issue is big enough to break up over.

    • I disagree with the anal part of that situation, because it’s not a fair exchange. Most of the time a man is the one who wants to be pegged, he asks his girlfriend to do that to him. Yet in this situation anal is also solely for his enjoyment so there’s no exchange in pleasure like there is in the oral sex version. I’d be horrified if my boyfriend pleaded me to penetrate him only to get angry when I didn’t want him to have anal sex with me.

    • @lilaqua "there would be a problem if the woman was fine doing that" was supposed encompass the equivalent of "she wants to peg me and gains sexual satisfaction from doing so", but I did word it poorly. So the situation I meant was that she wants to peg the guy, but doesn't want to do anal and the guy wants anal with her, but not get pegged.

  • Next time you think it’s selfish that she doesn’t want to do anal, borrow one of her dildos and jam it up your ass. You’ll see why she doesn’t want to let you do that to her. If anal is that big of a deal, just find a girl who likes it. Trust me, they exist. For the record, if you do it right and don’t pressure her if she’s definitely not into it, she may try it at some point and may even like it.

  • A double standard would be if she refused to give oral

  • Because they are two different things.

  • Anal is overrated and gross

    • Anal > Vagina

  • The ass hurts too much sometimes, some women don't like that. Sucking clit is not a painful act, it is quite the opposite.

  • Double Standards. Eating pu*sy is gross 😷

    • Depends if she washed up. Otherwise i'd rather eat pussy than fuck ass

    • @wisse gross even if cleaned.

    • It's totally okay for you to refuse oral sex, but you can't call this a double standard because as gross as eating pussy is, it's never going to be physically painful for you like anal for a woman usually is.

  • If she refuses to suck dick you refuse to lick pussy.

    Simple.

  • You seem strange

  • Of course, it's OK to refuse it.
    It's HER body.

  • It's not exactly the same. It would be with blow jobs. But anal is different. Let me put it this way: if your girl accepts anal sex, would you be ok if she sheved something up your ass aswell?

    • No..

    • Why?

  • 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂u are comparing anal with oral?

  • it's ok for everybody to refuse whatever sex they don't wanna have xD sex is about consent. if you don't consent, it's not legit.

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