Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
This is something that bothers me and I feel like I have to say something about it (or nobody else will), but I’m not nearly as articulate as Laci Green so I will let her tell you why slut shaming needs to stop.
I've highlighted the main points of the video for those of you who've decided to skip the video and go straight to the comments section.
One of the things Laci is saying is that sleeping around has nothing to do with how much you respect yourself.
"Not doing what you’re supposed to, to be a good respectable woman does not mean you lack self-respect."
Things that have to do with how much you respect yourself:
- Standing up for yourself
- Making your own decisions
- Not putting up with people’s bullshit
Things that have nothing to do with how much you respect yourself:
- What kind of sex you have
- What kind of clothes you wear
- What kind of makeup you put on
“For women promiscuity is considered a “stupid decision.” And when you make bad decisions you pay the consequences. Like losing everyone’s respect, being shamed, being called a slut, being bullied…. But for dudes promiscuity is not a “bad decision,” promiscuity is a very good decision.”
Okay, I'm done. What are your thoughts?
What Girls & Guys Said
19 42I don't go around shaming sluts, but i pick my association and if rather be associated with someone who has values
I don't kno that slut shaming will stop because believe it or not NOT EVERYONE uses the term in the same manner, where i grew up personally i wouldn't say it came down to just promiscuity alone
I skipped the video, but i disagree with some of the bulleted points
Nothing to do with want kind of clothes you wear? Bullshit, how you dress matters in life, to think otherwise is foolish, when i kno for a fact she's judging people based on their looks, it's hypocritical for her to expect different, that point is just ridiculous
I don't know if you use okcupid but there's a match question asking would you consider sleeping in the first date and a handful of girls have answered yes. Nevermind the slut shaming but that puts up a red flag as to how frequently they sleep on the first date with strangers because STDs are real and if a girl wants to get laid, she will. So it makes you wonder how frequently she sleeps with strangers on the first date. Now there's exceptions where it just happens or the girl knew a guy for awhile and they sleep on the first date, but if they're sleeping with every guy they meet on the first date then it's definitely a red flag.
And I think hats a big reason why girls put on their dating profiles, I'm not looking for a hook up or I'm not some booty call. They don't want to be perceived that way and I don't blame them.
No i don't use that site, but if they don't want a hookup or yo be used, good for them, they should advertise that fact as much as they feel necessary Personally the way i find intrest in a girl is from how she presents herself as a person, the way she talks, dresses, looks, acts all stand out
Regarding the what you wear bit, I totally agree. Dave Chappelle made a joke about it where the girls like I'm not a whore, I'm just dressed like one. He's like fair enough, dressing like one doesn't make you one but to be fair imagine being robbed and seeing a guy who isn't a cop in uniform and say hey officer help me, he's like hey I'm not a police officer I'm just dressed like one.
I guess a better example would be strip clubs. When guys go to strip clubs, they aren't going their to find a relationship, just a lay or lap dance. Now there are some women who are strippers solely for the money and aren't promiscuous or prostitutes, but if you work as stripper, people will view you as just a sex object.
If you're a slut but you're cool, i dont hate you. But if you're a bitchy, slut, who thinks non sluts are just secret sluts who are slaves to society then you're just a bitch and i hope you get stoned to death. Yes.
The girl certainly has a trashy mouth.
and it's fucking awesome
Oh, what? Does that make her a slut?
I don't know about the slut issue or not but it certainly doesn't help her cause and now with the aid of miserybusiness we have another to claim the prize of trashy mouth in addition to the video and I sure hope she's only on GAG to get advice and not giving it.
There are consequences for everything we do in our live. Sluts are a reality and they exist and you can't keep one for too long. They are cheap and have no self respect no matter what Jenna says. I found you, I banged you, I tossed you. Where is the respect in that?
Why would you toss a human being aside after you're done with them, however? Dont we all have worth? You found someone, banged them, then left.. thats pretty terrible, if you ask me.
If its terrible, then don't do it. And for the record, I did it once because I felt the urge to have sex and guess what, it was my worst experience. But a slut is a slut. She finds a new one every week if not every day. She is degrading herself.
You just described rape. I don't think that's what the author had in mind.
You are the one with no respect @Strider90
yeah ok whatever you say.
Call it whatever you want. I'm not going to date a girl that has a sexual rapsheet longer than the fucking Bible.
And believe it or not, it does have an affect on your relationships
https://i.imgur.com/ESuGIVw.jpg
FLAWLESS VICTORY!
Then don't, no one is going to make
Everyone can make their own decisions in their life, but don't expect me to have any any respect for those choices.
You don't have to respect them, but you also don't have to judge and call girls "sluts." What they do on their on time is none of your business.
The definition of "slut" is "a woman who has many casual sexual partners." I'm not that kind of guy that walks around and calls women sluts but to be brutally honest, the girls you are describing are by definition sluts.
What I'm saying is that people need to STOP calling women sluts because they enjoy sex and have had more than one sexual partner. A man who has had 20 partners would never be called a slut. That's sexism.
Trust me when I say that I have the equal lack of respect for both women and men that live that lifestyle. But of course calling people bad things isn't going to help anyone.
Promiscuous men are usually called manwhores. Even gay men who shame promiscuous gay men call them manwhores. Anyways the reason why promiscuous men are more successful with women isn't because the amount of partners they've had but the traits they have that get them women. Not saying that's ok but that's how it is.
That's like saying, "Different races exist, but don't expect me not to respect them." That's not a progressive opinion, so don't pretend that it is.
@electrollama I've got no idea what you are trying to say but ok
This goes for both genders. Women sluts do not respect men; as much as men sluts do not respect women! If you're a slut; you don't have respect for the other gender, because what you're telling them is that they are only good for sex, thus I am all for slut shaming!
I feel like I'm the only one who disagrees with the whole "stop slut shaming" thing.
I believe that people who sleep with countless amount of people are just idiots for multiple reasons.
So most of the time people who are "sluts" sleep with people they barley know. Im pretty sure when you just going around sleeping with random people these things around going to happening 1. Someone could end up being in a relationship. You could end up breaking it up and causing heartbreak. You could even break up a family 2. You could sleep with one person, contract an std, then pass it off to the rest of the people you sleep with. 3. you could end up being pregnant, and since you sleep with so many people you're not going to know who the father is. Even if you do know it's highly unlikely they will stay and support the child. Or if you're a man you could get even MULTIPLE women pregnant.
If someone actually knows who they are sleeping with, in a relationship with them, etc. then that's different. Because you know what you're getting yourself into. But if you just go around sleeping with the first people that come in sight, then I WILL "slut shame"
1. It's not your fault if you he or she cheats on their SO, unless you know and do the deed anyway. 2 and 3. Condoms, pills...
In my opinion, you either shame both genders, or neither.
A woman who has sex with dozens of men indiscriminately (with or without "protection"--you can still get STDs with condoms) is NOT (I repeat NOT) marriage material. Sorry to burst your little bubble. The only reason men even marry women like that is because they are either desperate or have low self-esteem themselves.
If you don't ever plan on having a long-term, loving relationship, then by all means slut it up all you want to.
Men who do the same thing are known as "players," and actually do have a bad reputation among people with self-respect.
I respectfully disagree. I think promiscuous behavior is risky due to increased spreading of STDs (No, not everyone always uses a condom). And in the long run, I think it's harmful for the slut because men will lose respect for her.
I look at sluts the way a lot of people look at smokers. Do I hate them? No, I don't hate sluts or smokers. Do I think they should go to jail or be punished by the law? No, I don't think sluts or smokers should be punished by law. Do I think its wrong and do I judge them? Absolutely.
Yeah you're right. I want my future wife to have all kinds of STDs. In fact, we should encourage it! Whoever gets the most diseases wins a gift card to Chipotle!
Yuck, I don't like chipotle. Pick something else
It seems like you wouldn't marry someone like this anyways, so what's your argument?
tbh Take Owner I was kinda digging this take until you said you didn't like Chipotle. Thats sacrilege
My argument is that this take is stupid. What's so hard to understand about that?
But promiscuity is disgusting no matter who is doing it.
It's your fault that you find it disgusting. If you didn't like the look of sweatpants, it wouldn't justify verbally harassing someone for wearing sweatpants.
Yes, wearing sweatpants is equivalent to risky sexual behavior. You know, the reason why people think that legalizing gay marriage will lead to bestiality is because of people like you who have the shittiest excuse for logic ever.
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...
For cryin' out loud, when will the whining from women end?
When the social injustice goes away.
I'm probably going to get shit for this and I'm not one to slut shame, but I think were going to stop slit shaming then some women should stop acting like sex objects.
Them having sex isn't the issue, but how they act about it. I've met some girls who brag about how many guys they've slept with and that's just as childish as guys bragging about it or ones that complain about being treated like a sex object yet send nudes to strangers or act overly sexual to strangers. I think that kinda behavior is why some men treat women like sex objects and see them as inferior.
If it's creepy or perverted for a guy to act like a sex object then how is it better for a girl to act that way? I'm not saying women shouldn't have sex but they just shouldn't act like sex is all they have to offer.
In other words, it's ok to have sex. You just shouldn't use use sex or act sexual to get people to like you or for validation. It's very counterproductive,
It does have to do with self respect - most often the men you have one night stands with don't respect you even if they pretend to, they just see you as a container to masturbate into - why would you sleep with somebody who doesn't respect you as a person unless you had no self-respect?
Also there's nothing wrong with societal standards, they're there for a reason. We have more and more STDs, more and more single Mothers, and you want people to stop slut-shaming so we can have more of that. Of course you'll tell me that people should be educated on contraception, they already are, they just ignore it. I don't see what's so bad about taking your time dating and finding someone who actually cares about you before getting into bed with them.
But still, there's nothing wrong with sleeping around provided they are on the pill and condoms are used.
@r3d_anonymous - we'll never agree
It has NOTHING to do with self respect. Me having sex with 10-15 guys has nothing to do with how much I respect myself. It has to do with how much I like to have sex. There's nothing wrong with a single woman acting like a single woman.
You can have lots of sex in a relationship with someone who doesn't just see you as a cum dumpster.
I think you are on to something, most men who sleep around really don't care about women, perhaps certain groups want to encourage women to sleep around so they will not respect men... Who would want to encourage that?
Not necessarily. I'd love to be in an actual relationship, but then again, I am totally open to casual sex too. And I care about girls. I am not going to manipulate them or use them. If I was to hook up with one, I'd do it provided she was fine with it too.
@R3d_anonymous - you might respect those women, plenty of guys do not.
Yeah it gets awkward trying to get to know a person for a potential relationship after you've slept with them on the first date. It's like the build up is in reverse. Granted there a few exceptions.
Or nobody else will? Seriously? "Slut shaming" is one of the biggest complaints from women on GAG. It's EVERYWHERE.
I'll support your desire to stop slut shaming when women stop "creep shaming" and "pervert shaming". You'll have better luck stopping the slut shaming if you stop your own hypocrisy first.
Creep and pervert shaming? Are you talking about men acting like sex objects?
I'm talking about men being shamed for their sexuality. It's no different than "slut shaming". Just different terms for the same sorts of things.
I just read the post from the anon lady who wrote this: "It's makes us look like whiny weak little brats who can't take one simple negative thing amongst the massive amount of positive. Yet we are completely cool with all the negative shit pushed on the other gender for their sexuality." Bravo! Such uncommon clarity and honesty from a woman, in a time when most women are such whiny little "victims".
I love how you structured the whole MyTake so much.
Thank you :D
I don't care if women have sex with tons of guys. But me and plenty of other men wouldn't want to commit to women like this.
You say you don't care, but at the same time, you wouldn't want to be in a relationship with those women. Seems like you do care.
@scarygoody34 It's about letting people do what they want, but that doesn't mean I am not allowed to judge them for their actions.
@scarygoodyr34
@scarygoodyr34 it means I don't care how they live theirs lives. I won't tell then what to do. But I wouldn't date them.
Yeah it's like guys won't commit to this kinda girl because they figure the girl won't commit and cheat just like a woman not wanting to date a male player for that same reason.