Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
I've seen this discussion going around a lot on G@G, detailing why "straight" women are so attracted to lesbian porn, and why we are also more likely to find attraction in women's bodies. I would like to present my own opinion on the matter, as I feel like it could de-mystify the argument a little bit.
Male and Female Sexual Desires are Inherently Different.
"The feeling"
I think some people have a really hard understanding why so called "straight" woman would find a girl attractive and masturbate to lesbian porn, exclaiming that they are not actually straight but some form of bisexual or in the closet lesbian. Where I think the disconnect lies, is that men and women tend to enjoy sex in two distinct manners. Men are more set on the idea of whom they are sleeping with, how hot they are, what their body looks like, what gender they may be. This is why men are seen as more visual creatures, because they fantasise about the person or people they want to be with, and are more turned on by the naked body of the person they are attracted to. For women on the other hand it's more about what, what can you do to me, how can you make me feel, how can I make you feel, the actual identity of the person may be a bit more irrelevant. This is why women come off as more personality driven, because they're looking for someone they have chemistry with and have good sex with. When we fantasise, it's about what they can do to us and what the sex it going to be like, not necessarily your specific body. Again, this isn't absolute, I have had my fair share of perving and I bet guys are searching for a good sex partner, but I think there's a little disconnect here. I think this is why women, unlike men, are turned on by effectively every sort of porn (gay male, lesbian, straight) as opposed to their preference, because it's about the feeling.Our orientation lies in who is actually having sex with us (I personally am not a fan of actually having sex with a girl but I can empathise and get turned on by the pleasure of lesbian sex) and yes it doesn't mean where all latent bisexuals, I think it means they're is a larger grey area for attraction.
"Male vs Female Gaze"
I know I know this is a commonly use as a media/film/literature term and has major SJW connotations but I think it has an interesting insight into the male and female psyche. For the uninitiated, "gaze" in cinema refers to the way a filmmaker frames the camera to suit (usually) the sexual interests of the audience, either for men or women, but also specific to sexuality in certain situations. I think we're all pretty familiar with what is known as the "male gaze", where the creator depicts women (or men) in a sexualised and objectified manner to suit the taste of the male audience. There is a lot of attention put onto how the individuals look as well as placing them in a position of passivity. This film style suits the "whom" based manner of men's sexuality, as it focuses on a person or people ready for the viewers consumption. Interestingly, a female gaze is not actually the gender flipped version of the male gaze but has been theorised to be quite different in execution. I’d like to bring up Anna Biller’s 2016 film the Love Witch (where my avatar is sourced from) to really showcase the guts of the female gaze.
In a conversation with Filmmaker magazine, Biller talks about how the film was explicitly created with female audiences in mind “I’m working very directly with female fantasy”, which includes how women are more attached to the idea of “a sense of pleasure in fantasising about receiving the kind of love or admiration that a woman gets when she is looked at by men.” It also details how the female sexuality, has a narcissistic component to it, enjoying the idea of looking at a beautiful woman in reference to ones self. I think that in enough itself adds a layer deeper into why women find other women attractive, because it directly reflects back onto them.
“Wanting more Sensual Sex”
This is very directed at the lesbian porn aspect, but I think another factor than comes into play in women’s preferences is that lesbian porn is simply more sensual and focused on the woman’s pleasure, not the man’s. Pretty consistently we’re seeing lesbian porn topping women’s preferences, and many are left scratching their heads, but I think it’s got to do with a mixture of different reasons. Firstly, I think this relates back to the previous two arguments, women want to fantasise about what’s being done to them, straight porn doesn’t reflect that, but lesbian porn does. I think lots of women get not satisfaction out of the and male centric way straight porn is created, and does not tap into the fantasies that women may actually have. There is more soft core, and “for women” categories of porn that exist, which are very popular with women, they cannot compete with the sheer volume of lesbian porn created in comparison.
“The Gap between Male and Female Fantasies and Reality”
I think this is a really important aspect of the difference in male and female sexual preferences on this topic. It’s generally agreed upon that men’s personal kinks and fantasies more readily effect their real life sexual preferences whereas women’s do not. This was shown in the University of Montreal’s study into kink, in which a large chunk of the women involved never wanted these to come true, in contrast the majority of men did want their fantasies to become reality. I think this extends to the idea of sex with the same gender, if men masturbate to it, it’s what they want, not the same for women on the other hand. I can understand the confusion here, especially on the part of men, but I think you just have to acknowledge the female fantasy as less of an indicator of actual desire and behaviour, and more about an exploration of boundaries in a safe environment.
“Not Bisexual”
Something to remember for those of you who may be anxious your girlfriend/wife will run off with a woman some day.
I think there is a little more wiggle room for women’s orientation than men’s due to the differences in sexuality, but there are definitely women, including myself, who only want to have sex with men no matter the situation. I think it’s important to detach fantasy from reality, understand that for straight women, it’s men they want to be with with and to trust their judgement in this situation. They are not hiding any sort of closeted sexuality, it’s just a difference in the way the opposite gender see their desire, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
A lot more could be added to this argument, especially regarding the societal manipulation of sexuality in women vs men but I just wanted to keep it relatively brief.
Thank you.
What Girls & Guys Said
12 40Basically women aren't attracted to men. They’re attracted to the way men are attracted to and desire them and what they can do for them but find women just as attractive, if not more but in the end will date men because they put them on a pedestal.
Untrue, They are. Opposite atttract many explanations in this threada are false. If women are not attracted to men then why are women really turned on when they are on the giving end of a sex act when they are really attracted to the guy? Because they find the guy hot.
@richardace_123 yeah but women are also turned on by watch girls kiss and animals fuck, doesn't really mean anything specific to men
Women pretend to be into watching girls kiss to turn guys on. They lie their asses off about being into women to impress us so they'll be more attracted to us. So overall, they really are seeking attention from the opposite sex. I'm not sure about animal sex though but that is funny. LOLOLOLOL
But i am attracted to Cole Sprouse tho
If gender is irrelevant then women should be aroused by women having sex with animals because situation is same. Glad to know that women enjoy animal porn as well as child porn.
When do women see women getting pleased by another women what kind of thought run into their mind?
They imagine themselves as a receiver or giver?
If the imagine themselves as a giver then they fantasize about licking vagina.
If they imagine themselves as receiver then they fantasize about licked by another women.
They have to imagine another person's body and mouth. My question is how do they imagine this?
This is totally a bullshit mytake.
I actually think it's more detached than that. When some straight women see lesbian sex they can empathise with the pleasure that's being given, it's not about who's the giver or receiver but just that it's sex and everyone is enjoying it. I think that comment about beastiality and child porn is widely innapropriate.
True. A very naive my take. It really is about attraction. How attracted the other person is with the other.
*For women on the other hand it's more about what, what can you do to me, how can you make me feel, how can I make you feel, the actual identity of the person may be a bit more irrelevant. YES! That's the point, if it is the case then women should be aroused by women getting pleased by animals, as well as baby girl getting pleased by men/women (child porn). *When we fantasise, it's about what they can do to us and what the sex it going to be like, not necessarily your specific body. YES! If it is the case then you wouldn't mind being pleased by another women, you wouldn't mind being eaten by another women. *focused on the woman’s pleasure, not the man’s - Any women getting pleased by anything (monkey, shemale), then why women don't get turned on when the woman is not sexy? *women want to fantasise about what’s being done to them - (by)? It means women aren't turned on by anyone's body, they are turned on by women getting pleased by anything? Your replay didn't match with your post
True. Like I said women pretend to be into lesbiansim to get attention from guys. So overall they want the D.
"extends to the idea of sex with the same gender, if men masturbate to it, it’s what they want"
I just want to emphasize that this is a yes for sex with the same gender, NOT for everything, let be clear.
You say it's about how it feels, but one of the most common traits of porn and of male fantasy in general is that *she likes it,* how does this fit into women not liking straight porn? Does it just not register that the female character is into it?
This articulates something I've long seen as the case. That is that men's sexuality is about the other person and women's sexuality is about how you make them feel. You say it so casually -- and I'm not saying it's an incorrect assessment, just that it's something I find hard to reconcile with. Effectively both my sexuality and her's are about her. Makes me feel neglected. It's like girls aren't into me as a guy much at all, rather it's this character they have in their heads about me that is more important and what powers that character has to affect her. It's like you could replace me with any guy that just does the same things -- it's not about me at all. For a long time I've struggled with this understanding.
However I've never really talked with a girl about it before, so if you've got some magic words to make being straight feel compatible with reality again that would be cool...
Sorry if I came off in the way I did. I wholeheartedly stand by my opinion on the objective vs subjective way men vs women desire, but you're right I probably didn't explicitly state how pleasing a man is also wrapped up in that package. In reality I think sexuality for either gender is rather selfish depending on how they are expressed (for a man it could be complete objectification and lack of acknowledgment of the other person as a human being or a woman it could be that they only care about their own pleasure) but this isn't always the case. With you feeling neglected, I think girls feel very similarly when dudes just see them as another "slut" or another "chick" to fuck and can feel very replaceable. I think for you it's important to remember if you've got feelings for the other person, their pleasure and making love to them eclipses a lot of those more selfish tendencies.
The thing is none of her statements bear any truth. If you've been with enough woman you will know. It all rests in the amount of attraction to each other. If woman are about subjectification then why would some women orgasm while giving blowjobs? This has happened to me from previous relationships and they were highly attracted to me. Giving a blowjob is mainly for the man's pleasure but when women are highly attracted to you they admire your body and enjoy playing with it even without penetrating them. Same goes withy men. If I am only a little bit attracted to a woman I don't enjoy pleasing her or going down on her as much as opposed to a woman I am highly attracted to. It all rests in the attraction so don't let a single person's opinion change your perception about intimacy. It all rests in the attraction and chemistry. If a woman is only after her pleasure then you should question her attraction to you.
Try dating a woman who you know is really into you, in fact is way more into you, than you are into her then you will see what I'm talking about. I also forgot to mention that if it's all about how you make her feel then why do these women that are attracted to the guy get wet when hearing the guy moan? Because she is really attracted to him and craves his body sexually. Just like in a man's case I can hear a woman moan all day but if I am not attracted to her then it does nothing but if I find her hot then absolutely.
"making love to them eclipses a lot of those more selfish tendencies" I know that caring about someone helps make everything just feel okay. But the problem is that I'm already focusing on her. That's the point. I had this conversation with a gay guy I met at a party on Halloween 2016. We were alone and somehow got onto how sexuality works. I expressed an interest in men being attracted to me because I feel if a guy would be attracted to me, I would feel that he's *really looking at me* and makes me feel attractive. Girls are just asking how I can make them feel and I'm asking for mutual attraction. I don't get how it's mutal if my sexuality revolves around her and her sexuality revolves around her. Both men and women's negative examples of sexuality you provided are examples of objectification. But they're extreme and negative, Im talking about what's normal. Where do I fit into a hetero sexual attraction besides the things I do (things "outside" of me), where's the mutual attraction
So are you bisexual? My point is men are often experiencing these problems because they pursue women based on their looks even if the woman has no attraction to them. Opposite attract and if you encounter a woman who actually is highly attracted to you then sexuality will be focused on you. Because like I said I've been with women who were really attracted to me and the sexuality was in fact focused more on me. Some were mutually focused, while a few are on the women. Those women who are mainly focused on their sexuality should be dumped right away because it reflects their low level of attraction to you. Why be with someone who does not have the same level of attraction to you? Be wise in choosing women because there are great women out there it's just a matter of using your mind and seeking the woman who has a high attraction level with you.
@richardace_123 You said it best. Original Commenter, take notes. You're saying "All women only care about their pleasure" That's bull shit. I've been with a bunch of women who've asked "What can I do for you? What do you want to me do? How do you want me to pleasure you?" These girls, like ricahrdace said, were into me as much as I was into them or more than I was into them. I don't really go for girls who aren't into me. If i get the vibe they're not interested, I say fuck 'em and go talk to another girl, funny thing is if they see me talk to another chick after I was denied by them, they suddenly gain interest and come insert themselves in my new conversation. But I'd say girls and guys are pretty much only interested in their sexuality if it's a hookup. They couldn't give 2 shits about the other person getting off cause they couldn't give 2 shits about the other person. Relationships, FWB's etc are different though. Unless you are completely bitch made and kiss your partners ass
@DrJo3 True dat. Same here if she is not interested i cut em off. Why waste time and be with someone who acts above you? Nothing better than be with a woman who gets off pleasuring you. You are indeed right too. The moment you show them you are not interested or you don't care and move to the next they start chasing you. That's why it's almost better to have them chase you. Women like challenges.
@richardace_123 I'm not bi, it's just that the idea of being with a guy is appealing because of *how* they seem to be attracted. Any romantic interest I have in guys is purely based on how naturally sincere their interest in me presents itself as. That's really the closest thing I have to an experiential reference for feminine sexuality; I'm not actually attracted to these guys sexually but I feel really good that they're into me and want me. That's my reference for feminine sexuality. Females rarely make me feel wanted or attractive in and of myself, instead it's rooted in things can do to her.
It seems to me that you make poor choices when dating women. You must be going for the ones who are not attracted to you and are way too into themselves so They'll date you to temporarily use you until they find a guy they are genuinely attracted too. It sounds harsh, but really you need to choose a woman who you know is attracted to you. Choose a woman who you are certain is into you as much as you are into her, or pick someone who wants you more.
I just realized too asker. You are seeking an opinion from an 18 year old woman. She clearly is not an expert in the dating game and sexuality. You should understand fully that her take is indeed very flawed due to lack of knowledge.
This really cleared things up. I'm under 18, so its not like I'm a porn addict or anything like that, I'm actually super straight, but sometimes I watch lesbo porn (& not to like get off or anything) but its actually really, oddly, nice? And I was freakin out because I thought I was lesbian when I accidentally encountered it and didn't find it gross at all, but I don't want to have sex with a girl, its really odd, but you explained it well. Also, I feel like everyone's a little gay. I don't know.
Thanks for your input, I was hoping I could help a couple of girls and guys to understand why this phenomenon exists.
Trust me, I much prefer les. porn, over straight porn. I'm straight
Speak for yourself. I’m sexually attracted to men’s bodies and sick of having this reality erased.
It's all a propaganda people really believe in many falsified statistics.
I'd rather have a guy do that to me he has a stronger hand
Fair enough, I agree with you. I'm sick of the idea that women are incapable of being sexually attracted to men and blah blah blah. It pisses me off to no end because it's just so different from my own experience, that has a lot of lusting after dudes, but no ladies.
I love you
Love you sis 💝
This is a nice take but it really doesn't do much to change the perception that women are simply more bisexual than men. Any person who gets off to images of two members of their same sex having sex is either bisexual or gay. It doesn't mean they will ever act on it... most won't... but if fantasizing about it gets them off, then they are gay or bisexual by definition. It really is that simple.
There's nothing wrong with it at all. I'm totally cool with it. But let's be honest about it.
http://www.BBC.com/news/health-34744903
I still think it's really hard to actually analyse female sexuality on a male scale. I find it really interesting than women are, unlike men, turned on by everything, gay, lesbian, straight or even animal sex, despite showcasing no inclination to actually engage in some of those behaviours. The animal thing to me is especially interesting, since no one runs around calling all women zoophiles.
Gay guys like to point a finger at girls (in the sense "don't disregard us, girls say they're straight but are more homosexual than we gays are")
Straight guys who can't get laid use it as an excuse: "because most girls are lesbians, they don't want ME".
This is actually not true. The only reason a woman will say she is into lesbian porn is to turn the guys on. It's all about impressing guys. But I do know of some women who actually enjoy watching male to male gay porn.
Why would she masturbate to lesbian porn by herself to turn guys on? I think there's a little more going on here. I'm not dismissing gay porn is popular, that would make sense, but lesbian porn is consumed statistically more.
Newsflash: A lot of these statistics are made up to promote their propaganda. I have known and dated women who initially pretended to be into the so called "lesbian" thing turns out they were doing it just to turn me on and in fact they can't even imagine doing things with a woman. It's all lies.
Whare you on? I watch lesbian porn because i get turned on by hot girls so i guess your argument is invalid.
@Nokeisit You are not straight. Don't even deny. If you're a lsebo accept it. If not stop pretending that you are into women just to please men. You're not fooling anyone.
I think it's because girls look better than guys, for the most part. And 'nads are gross - I don't even like looking at my own.
And that my friend is the mentality that will make women treat men like dogs.
I don't think that's true. Female sexuality is less geared to the person they're actually with in the first place, I think the idea that men look worse than women is the product of a society in which men are afraid of being labelled as homosexual. Look at the Ancient Greeks, no shame in acknowledging the beauty of the male form.
i.pinimg.com/.../...pagan-men-sculpture-garden.jpg
No my point uis having low regard for his own kind men in a way devalue guys, kind of presenting women are the admirable ones while men are nothing.
Sorry but I don't see muscle definition as a beautiful thing. I find that statue, and the person it represents, neither sexually or aesthetically interesting.
Maybe because your straight smart guy? But to a woman a man is better looking but for guys women are. Common sense. But actually in terms of body aesthetics men's physique is considered a piece of art as opposed to a woman. And saying that penis which is the very esseence of manliness is gross reflects how much of a beta cuck you are. Actually no offense to women, vaginas are amazing but are way more gnarly looking than dicks.
@richardace_123 Who invited you to this thread? You are like the guy who walks up between two people at a party and tries to hijack the conversation and talk about something unrelated. And 'nads are balls, not a penis.
Triggered much? Anyone can post on this thread. So if a beta cuck of a guy wants to leave a comment that devalues men then he should be ready to have a conversation with men with a high sense of value.
@richardace_123 The point of the original article is why straight women would tend to like lesbian porn more than straight men would like gay male porn. But apparently you are irritated because you prefer watching dudes go at it. Well have at it. And yes, anyone can be a dick and jump in a thread and start talking about Australian Rules Football or anything else. Those kind of people are so much fun to be around.
Prefer dudes going at it? Sounds like that's your thing especially you are apparently afraid of your own genitals. You prolly want to be a transgender? And you are the one who started to be irritated I just corrected you on your effeminate post.
@richardace_123 Oh oh, a beta cuck corrected me. No wonder women treat you like a dog.
Hahaha no woman has buddy. Sorry to say. But with your mindset, wouldn't be surprised if a woman is walking all over you.