Would you give your virginity to a guy, who made you feel pressured with sex?

[Anonymous]

So here i am, I met a guy, so handsome,. he is really 10/10 in appearance

I can't get him off my mind,. as he open up my mind with the idea of sex world.

I preserve my virginity, cause I want first to be responsible enough, fully committed to one guy, and a wife image.. I really want to have sex after marriage, cause i think that will be romantic

The first and only time i met this guy, i thought he would take me to have some coffee,but he focused too much. (i offered him massage at his back cause he says he is too tired, i flirted with him in text before we meet) so, instead of giving me a normal date, he bring me somewhere, and made me believe we are having coffee there.( im not ignorant , i trusted him, so i enter that place ). I told him, Im virgin, before we met, so i thought he would go simple and slow for me because that's the first time we meet

(as i am in that place my only really plan is to give him a backrub, that's all)

and when im done in that back rub, he soon grab me, and gave me a foreplay kiss, until im in the zone of just wearing my bra infront of him.

that time im not really ready for sex,. but im really pushed to have sex,. At first, before he removes my top, i already told him in not ready. But he insisted, so to make the story short, 3 hours out, we are just kissing, cause he keeps on insisting to kiss me,(where i know i couldnt give him anything more than that)

after that night, I really feel so much of the urgent to surrender my virginity to him. I freak out, had anxiety

but i really dont want to forget myself.. So I let him go, and tried to forget about him.

But then, I realize , that I really really like Him( i felt that we are sexually match), now he is all gone and out of nowhere, i dont know, how i can start a connection with him again. I know he did nothing to win me..

>>>>But i want to do it with him now because i think he is the best one to have it, than giving it to other guy ( that im afraid, i won't like)
my worries is just.. the moment i approach him again, - He will think im so desperate,needy and my self worth will be so down

He simple can't get off my mind, thats why im deciding to really surrender myself to him.

I dont want to get/date another guy anymore. If i would as im really pressure because of him

i want to be so much ready: Im in my best version 10/10, Im ready for sex( responsible enough), I can earn money on my own(im a student), A really possible wife image( If ill have sex,then im ready to be someones wife)

I felt that pressure in me, and i know i need a lot of time(years) before i become the best version of myself
I simply think of this, this way, cause if I won't be ready for a guy im dating with: How can i make him feel love, How can i made him feel, he is enough, i am enough. How I would not pity a guy,if i neglect to have sex

so im opening up myself to that thought to having sex with a guy, if I start dating again

- In addition
I've tried to sleep beside another man after him( so i would completely forget about him, just sleep nothing happens at all) thats why i stop myself in the dating world.. cause i dont want to pity a guy waiting for me to be ready(or waiting me to have sex with him)

To cut the story short:
I want to surrender myself to that guy who made me feel pressure
if I won't, then I will wait years waiting to be ready for a guy before i date another one :<

I dont want to do it with other guy, because he is simply the guy i want, if i'll have my first experience

What do you think about this?

[Warmapplecrumble]

Don't do it, in fact leave the guy dump him.

I don't think he's a decent guy from what you said and is taking advantage of you.

Next time don't tell a guy about you being a virgin - that way he won't know.
You can tell the guy you have some sexual trauma, and you'd like to take things slow. Its not 100 percent honest but that way he won't take advantage of you.

[Warmapplecrumble]

And***

[myTake Owner]

well, being virgin is really tough :/ :<

[Warmapplecrumble]

Find better guy

[myTake Owner]

yes, im moving forward but im going to wait for years, until im finally ready so, I won't embarrassed a guy again, because of that thought of" not being ready"

[Warmapplecrumble]

You don't need to wait years, just do it when you are ready ♥

[Warmapplecrumble]

Thank you for MHO ♥