Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
I have been on tinder for a couple years and I've discovered quite some things. I'm not obese, but well, I'm kinda chubby. And being a chubby girl on tinder, really makes dating very different than when you are skinny. I used to be skinny when I first got on tinder. After a few months I gained a lot of weight and kinda stayed that way. Didn't get much less matches. But the way guys see you and why they date you changes A LOT. Small detail, and I don't want to brag: I know I'm not ugly. Still do some modeling for plus size clothing. Just not thin anymore. So for people who are not sure about how they look, this take is mainly for women who have questions about their weight. Not looks in general.
Is it worse when you are on the heavier side? Well for most of us, yes. Though I still had a lot of fun and met some great guys. But do guys contact you for the same reason? Nope.
In short: If you're cute and have a fit body, guys want to date you, not just for sex, but often with further goals. They might want to keep seeing you, start a relationship and show you as their girlfriend to their friends and family. If you are chubbier, well... get used to getting on your knees and putting that mouth to work on the first date!
Tinder for thin girls: easy mode
When I was thin, guys were really careful with how they chatted with me. They chose carefully what kind of date it was, where we'd meet, how they dressed up for the date, and of course how they carefully checked when and how they would get in my pants. Their purpose was often also sex, but they had so much more respect for me. I noticed that they would love to see me more often and even show me off as their proud catch to their friends.
Tinder for big girls: hard mode
Since I got chubby, things changed completely. Still met up with the same type of guys. Still always guys i thought were hot. But Their intentions were completely different. The way they talked to me, the fact that they chatted the same day/night they so necessarily wanted to meet up, and where they wanted to meet up. Just one reason: getting their balls emptied.
Now I'm not really looking for serious relationships. I mainly want to date, get to know guys and see where it goes. Honestly I prefer to just have some great connection with a guy than a serious relationship. But I can't count the times I blew guys on the first date and quite often only date. And I also noticed that it's mainly the blowjob that's popular. Sex too, but that's more for a second date. I really don't mind giving guys blowjobs on the first date though. I feel comfortable with casual sex and really like giving blowjobs. But I do get that most women don't think that way and might feel slutty or used. In the beginning when I gained weight, I often turned them down when they asked for a favor, and the dates ended really quickly every time. And when I did do it, well at least it was fun and some of them asked for a second date. That second date was often also with sex as the goal, but by the third or fourth date I usually got a connection with some pretty cool guys.
When they text you, you notice immediately they don't even try to hide the fact they just want to get off as fast as possible cause they feel horny. They also try to come to my place immediately, and honestly I even offer to just cook for them at my place, or "watch a movie" cause I know that's what they want. If I went out, I ended up on my knees in a toilet stall, his car or even behind a dumpster... Romantic, right?
All these things aren't just my experiences, I talked to a lot of women with the same body type as me, and so many of them experience the same thing. Not all of them of course, but it still seems to be very common. I even talked to a couple guys that were really good looking and were open enough to talk about why they, who can date any girl, wanted to come to my place so suddenly, not being too much of a gentleman, and got their loads of baby juice all over my face in no time. They admitted that they also lost count of how often this scenario happened and that it's "just the way it goes. Why not?"
Again, I'm not saying dating has become horrible for me since I got curvy. I'm still having an awesome time. It just got a lot harder to get that plain nice, cosy date. It's like dropping in ranking and having to work a little first to get something.
What do you think about my take? Is it fair, or should these guys' attitude towards us change? Please share your opinion!
#tinder #sexlife
What Girls & Guys Said
19 73Still sounds like easy mode, regardless of being chunky now.
I understand that you like the casual sex aspect. Reading your experience, I can say I don't share it. I used to be about 15lbs overweight- but I was never treated differently. I think guys pick up on more than just weight. Maybe it's a vibe? Maybe it's what you're saying? I do believe men in general assign less value to heavier women- but not all of them. I know a TON of guys who love and worship thicker chicks and not just for sex
Good take. No these guys shouldn't change their attitude, you should lower your standards as there are plenty of fat guys or just low quality guys on tinder.
I'm sorry, but…what? :-D
Try t be guy on tinder. You unlock another mode. The impossible one.
Only you don't know how to take pictures. I mean come on, it's a goddam art!! lol
@GreatnessBack Well, I'm not (hot) chick, so there aren't any photographers willing to take my pictures. But it's also about girls answering messages etc.
Interesting and, expectedly, arousing story. However, I'm afraid it's not about the overweight bias. It is more about the fortune of being chubby and cute.
So basically these are your escapades of being a fat slut? Lmao you should just turn this into a TED talk. If you want guys to treat you differently, then stop being lazy and becoming fat. Also, fat doesn't equate the curvy.
she's not overweight why should she have to be in perfect shape all the time
Wow tony. I'm so disappointed in you. Didn't think that's how you think.
I agree curvy and fat means different things but this is no way to talk to people.
You Tony are simply not worth trying to talk sense into. What an asshole.
🤷🏻♂️ not here to make friends. just speak the truth
A good take. When i seen your question first, i though i was looking at Ivy Doomkitty. She's a curvy woman and drop dead gorgeous.
As to your take, i've never dated on Tinder or any other dating site. I would approach women i find attractive myself. That said, there is a lot of truth in what you say. I think guys think larger curvy women are desperate and therefore easy, and that the women expect little else in the attitude from the guys.
I've dated skinny, normal sized and curvy girls, i've respected all of them. Yet i could see that the curvier women were always suspicious of my intentions at the start.
My S/O is a big woman, curvy, not at all obese, and tall, in fact she's taller than me. But she carries herself very well and with pride and confidence. That attracted me most to her.
You're better than this (Tinder). Find a guy who like you for YOU.
So apparently chubby dtf bitches are the way to go. Good to know
I'm not on tinder, but interesting take 😊
Basically, thin girls are wanted and fat girls are avoided !!!
Next breaking news : water is wet!!! ice is cold!!! and fire may burn !!!
Right I'm like what's the mystery here?
@Anon-ymous1 the mistery here is "why did a girl downvoted me!!!" ;-)
the last pic is trashy. Although that is how sluts have sex. So trashy and dirty
Well, that's about the end of every first date for me :)
Hey the diva your so pretty I could see myself growing old with a girl like you 😊 too bad you live in my computer lol but really you must be in a band cause you fucking rock
@AntonSomm I'm married
I dont have anything against curvy women. I also prefer women that have some kind of body around their skeleton (not like every «model» ever).
Although I never use Tinder, I personally would love to (if I get into Tinder someday) match with a «curvy» girl!
Interesting take
Tinder sucks ass
I can say that, from my own experience with online dating, the instant I saw "curvy" listed as the body type for a particular girl, was the instant I lost interest and moved to a different profile. They're far more likely to only have pics of their face/shoulders, so that you can't see their whole body because they're fat/overweight and don't want you to know it. That's both uninteresting and also disingenuous to potential partners. But I've seen it literally hundreds and hundreds of times. It's a pretty big turn off, since being overweight is a turn off.
slut
interesting little social experiment
Ultimately whatever makes you happy is what you should continue doing
Tinder is a hookup app, and as such, people want social perfection.
This is why ripped guys and thin hot girls get top billing!!!
IRL, people are more open to other kinds of body types, but not on Tinder.