Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
I come from a collectivistic culture and people are also very conservative here. It's India. The country with the most rapes, or otherwise now fondly called as 'Rape culture.'
I was dating a guy, one day he comes up to me to say that I should stop wearing shorts or anything semi- transparent. That was the day we started fighting.
I don't understand why men or anyone would advise a woman about what to wear but not walk up and tell a guy that he needs to behave. Is our society that ill-minded? If a woman gives up her choice and covers up, why can't a man cover his eyes and mouth?
When you go to a beach and you wear beach shorts and some men take pictures of you, I definitely got furious but I was scared to go to the police because I didn't know if they will harass me too. And to make it all more hard for me, the families sitting around did not give a shit about it and some were laughing at my uncovered legs.
Priyanka Chopra wearing a dress in front of the Prime minister became hot news over the whole country and people couldn't bare that shit. But please, people need to be sensible about the issues bothering our country.
When people have all the guts to tell a woman what to wear, how to talk, and all that why not walk up to fellow men and tell them to behave?
Stop stigmatizing children from birth. A girl needs to be gifted everything in pink and a boy in blue and girls with Barbies and guys with guns and cars. Seriously people? I was gifted guns and cars and I was gifted barbies too. I still remember I used to break the barbies hands and legs and throw it off. I loved the guns more. What's wrong? People tag me to be a tomboy now. Sorry! I was just brought up to be bold and embrace equality.
So when I talk about equality, to all the women around there who still think a guy should pay the bills and open the doors or he should propose to her please go back to BC. Grow up. When we talk about equality, it's in everything. Be bold to pay your own bills and buy a diamond. Be proud.
And the conservatism in my country, I don't really know if it does any good to anyone but I am definitely sure it does bad. We are being watched even when we talk to someone from the opposite culture. So the ideas of what is the opposite gender like is always in mind. So comes the rape culture. "We wanted to teach the girl a lesson as she was roaming at night" with a guy said an asshole, a rapist who inserted a rod in her vagina and was gang raped. This happened four years back and hence been something which was looked up by some rapists who followed doing the same to women.
I wish the youngsters had all the brains to stop bothering about why Priyanka Chopra wore a dress infront of the Prime minister rather try to behave!
Sincerely, a boiled up Indian woman who is scared of being raped when I go out or even when I am in my home locked up.
What Girls & Guys Said
14 49What you wear is nobody's business? True. But what they think of you isn't any of your business either. You seem to think its easier on men or something. India has a massive population, even if a small fraction of Indian men are despised, it generally accounts for the entirety of men in this country for some reason. What for? Why should someone else be accountable for some scumbag somewhere else? So you met some asshole? Sorry you. You have a problem with the guy? Take it out on him. I'm sure he's an asshole. I'm sure friends would be too. But he's not the fucking ambassador for men in this country.
What they think is their problem. But doesn't mean the girl is the one to be responsible. Maybe men should be brought up in a better way.
You say what people think is their problem, but then you go on to say that they should be brought up a better way? See the irony?
Better way to not come and touch the woman. Having a perspective about a woman shows his ill mind. Yes! But at least not harass or abuse the woman.
And how many guys you know have harassed and abused you?
I am talking about the common society
Yeah, but how do you come to the conclusion? Based on what? Common society?
Because the guys who will rape you will not change their ways or learn better from being told "don't rape."
It's not about them not knowing it's wrong, everybody fucking knows it's wrong, and some guys out there walking the streets, dressed in normal clothes, who look just like any other normal person, will rape you any chance they get.
You know what else is some good advice? Don't stick your hand on a hot burner. You know? Because you'll get burned. Not because I'm trying to control you, not because I'm sexist, not because I'm a big meanie trying to cramp your style, but because YOU will GET. . . BUUUURRRRRRRRNNNNNNEEDD.
I understand. You think you should be able to do absolutely anything you want anytime you want, anywhere you want, any way you want, just because you want it and for no other reason, and you also think you should never feel a negative consequence for any of it, ever.
I understand, but you are the stupidest motherfucker alive if you really think that's how the world works. Sorry! Truth! Downvote me all you want. But we live in a world that is NOT perfect, unfortunately.
When it comes to protecting yourself, you can not rely on someone else. It's your responsibility to make sure that you're not going to be in a situation where you'll get hurt.
What happens if she has to work nights but can't afford a taxi? You need more CCTV cameras, no one's going to rape you if they're being filmed.
Sorry, but this is just BS. I'm sorry for anyone making you feel unsafe or vulnerable, but this new excuse to dress like slutty hoes and pretend this is a woman's lib thing is just crap. If I came to work in cock hugging yoga pants I would be sent home. But if I send a female employee home for his attire, I'm sexist. No not at all. Just be reasonable ladies seriously. If you think we really want you walking around in only lingere or bikinis, think again...
The key for us men is to look and admire at these scantily clad women, but not overly stare and act perverted.
If I'm out and I see a girl with a halter top and leggings, and I approach her and have good rapport with her throughout the night, a slight and playful remark about her cleavage should NOT offend her and make her now think of me as a perverted sexual predator. That's ridiculous.
The cold hard truth is this; if women can somehow magically ONLY get attention from men they were interested in dressing this way, they would. But tough shit. Said woman CANNOT control who she attracts. Gotta take the 'good attention' with the 'bad attention'.
She may not think of you as a predator but she is most likely going to find it disrespectful. Do u really do that?
@Herxlncy I do if I feel she has that type of sense of humor, once I was talking to a girl at a club, and I intentionally stared at her cleavage on purpose for 2-3 seconds as she was talking, then I said "oops you distracted me" with a smirk. She found it funny! You would find that offensive? Really?
I would hate to be a woman in India. For a country that wants to be seen and accepted as a modern 21st century state, it leaves a lot to be desired.
Things will never change, or not change easily. Not when men take advantage of the backward culture there and use it as an excuse to decide what woman deserves to be raped and who doesn't. It's an excuse to indulge in animalistic behaviour.
How to change it is up to women, men aren't going to, they don't want to, and they will fight it. A mass movement of women is needed, and an unrelenting campaign to change the male attitude is necessary. But you must be united across all of society to achieve this.
Even across Western cultures women are slut shamed for how they dress. Guys don't understand that women dress to enhance their attractiveness, or for exhibitionist reasons, or to simply stand out. Whatever the reason, it's never an invitation.
I cannot control someone else's behavior regardless of what stupid infomercials you throw at me. If the threat of DEATH hasn't prevented person from doing X, surely lecturing them won't either. It's like driving a car, you assume everyone else is horrible at it to save your own ass. Protect yourself.
"Teach men not to rape." Pfff teach murderers not to murder... write up an essay on how that turns out, due next Monday.
I have seen countless examples of women using their boy frineds for money, gifts and shit. But i have the sense not to undermine an entire gender for that. The fake rape cases in delhi is reaching alarming levels. Jasleen kaur stands as a shining example of how easy it is to ruin mens lives.
Then again i empathize with how women are perceived in our society. Yes, india needs better civic sense. Yes, women need more protection. We are in a cultural shift. It is bound to happen sooner than later.
Just have some sense to not vilify men as a whole
And you think Indian girls are any better?
You have a reputation of marrying men for green cards, demanding money, I have even heard of many cases where a guy committed suicide because he could not afford dowry.
Also India doesn't have the highest rapes. Sweden has the highest rape in the world and South Africa comes second. The only reason why Indians seems high is because of the media and high population.
i live in india so i know what you feel and what girls face here, i think the same that guys should behave properly and girls can wear anything they want its there body, there own life someone should not tell them what to wear and yeah the 4 years back rape case was extremely bad
nice work on take
I dont give anything to work with if girls were to bitch at me.
My condolences for your past experiences. I don't know what else to say.
Stay strong girl and stay true to yourself! ✊
Girls should wear dresses because they won't get respect from men if they don't.
Feminists have been saying the same thing to American men for decades. The problem is, the bad guys just ignore the memo. The predators will be always be out there - and they can't be guilt shamed. So the only question that really matters is, how serious are you about protecting your own safety?
This!!! 🏆🏆🏆
Firstly, who is ever Teaching men to rape women? That's right, nobody. A rapist is mentally ill, they are criminals. You don't get to decide that. It is therefore in your best interest to be "street smart".
It's also your responsibility to stay safe. Are you going to chastise me for looking at a woman's body because she is showing it on purpose, though? I'm not a rapist, but surely you must think I am. What else is there to say? Even though you may not be a ho, I surely must think you are based on the way you dress?
Talk about equality, not selective equality.
Uhm, aa a fellow indian (i only lived there 7 years but it was in my teens so i know how things are) i have to agree that there is a lot of stupid stuff that needs a makeover in our culture, but some of the things that you adressed were completely unreasonable.
First of all, there is no such thing as rape culture.
I talked to a lot of guys about this and its pretty much universally accepted thats its not okay. And even if a guy was a rapist , he would be ashamed to admit it. I dont know where you get all these guys who openly brag about it or promote it.
(and i know some people. blame rape on the girl, which needs to change, but blaming it on her is not the same as saying that they support it. They still acknowledge that its bad, they just shift the blame on the wrong person).
India is by far , not the country with the most rapes.
I think its congo, if i remember rightly.
India is pretty much peaceful now, doesn't have a civil war going on. If you didn't know, rape rates occur in the same rates as other violent crimes. If you are in a place where violent crimes are high, chanves are rape is high as well. And there are such poverty stricken and violent places in india, but they exist in western countries such as the us as well. Rapes can be high in those places. But overall in the country, especially where its generally peaceful, rape rates aren't that high.
Which is why that rape case that was over the media 4 years ago was so highlighted. Because such a cruel and gruesome as was NOT common and it was NOT accepted in the community.
However the self hating media is taking it too far making it look like this is how all indians are. Which is not true.
2- now that the above rant is over, i wanna go into the ither topic which i find ridiculous. Of course your boyfriend is gonna tell you to wear more conservative clothing.
Yes the oerverts need to keep to themselves but as a single person he can't go upto every single pervert in your city and tell them to change their ways. And even if they di, do you really think that will make them change? Of course not they will never change. So he naturally just tells you instead which is much simpler. Also, he may not want other guys to see you like that because he wants you for himself. I dont think thats too bad, i would be the same way. I dont want other guys to see my girl in a sexy way.
And lastly since it is (unfortunately) a conservative society , he wants people to see you in classy clothes, so that they respect you.
let me rephrase your topic and tell me if it sounds right the other way around. Instead of saying men, lets replace it with another group such as muslims, blacks, hispanics. you are not any less of a bigot for demonizing one entire gender just because you are a women. Trust me sweetheart, men are not the only bad people out there but the difference between me and you is, I wouldn't make an entire mytake bashing women.
If you dress like a hoe, expect to be treated like a hoe. Simple.
Don't really understand why men tag a woman to be hoe with the dressing. It is my wish about what i expose. Doesn't mean i ask for it.
People judge a book by its cover, simple. It's not what you expose, it's how you do it and behave.
You still can't really go rape a woman. Men should understand that.
Of course you don't. What? Only men judge? I mean you can dress the way like, but people can't think what they want?
Some people have issues, you should understand that. So if you don't adapt to the situation, well it's on you.
I'm still not convinced when you end up blaming the woman. So, a woman gets horny she can rape a man? This ain't 15th century people should grow up and men like you should stop supporting those rapists. Apologies for making harsh comments.
If you dress like a tramp women will treat you like one. How you present yourself will always have repercussions... most men will look maybe some will stare. A minority will harass and a fringe minority will rape. I've seen women pinch men's bums out of nowhere... it has happened to me. I've also seen women go up to men without shirts and touch their muscles/abs without asking or saying anything beforehand.
@TheUsername27 I do understand women get more privileges and it has to be just stopped too. Men undergo similar situations too. I'm sorry for what ypu have experienced.
I agree. I'm sick of the women being blame for the way she dresses that causes guys to rape her. Smh.
I live in Miami and I see women here dress super sexy to the point of almost naked sometimes, I look and just move on. Its called self control.
I'm okay with girls showing anything I would never rape or allow rape but I'll ask for consent to be able to fuck them. is that any better?