Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
The Fifty Shades phenomenon has baffled many people since the book first starting selling like a wildfire in 2011. Many men especially, are confused by it. Why do women seem to like this story so much? In the era of # me too, and the fight over greater equality on a social scale, why is it that women fantasize about a vapid rich jerk, who emotionally manipulates them and sadistically dominates them in the bedroom?
I believe the biggest factor in all of this, is the one that is most often overlooked - women's sexual repression in our current society. For so long, men have had more freedom to be open about their sexual interests, to be regarded with praise for their sexual endeavors, and to gloat about their borderline addiction to Internet porn use. Women on the other hand, have always been expected to remain proper, polite, and squeaky clean, or face societal backlash and be labeled.
I think this all came to a head with Fifty Shades. It was the first mainstreamed, cultural push of a product that was aimed explicitly at women, and was also overtly sexual in nature. It created something of a bandwagon effect. Many, many women latched onto the books not because it was the most riveting tale they're ever heard of, but as a way of saying "Yeah, I'm interested in sexual stuff. Don't judge me, all of these other women are too".
It wouldn't have mattered what the story was about exactly, or how it was written. All that mattered was that it was a sexy book that all women were "allowed to be" intrigued by. It just so happens that the story was a poor blend of the Beauty and The Beast trope, mixed with porn-inspired ideas of what S&M relationships were like. Nobody was particularly thrilled with it, but more so the idea of going to see a smutty film with their girlfriends so that hopefully their man would start to raise an eyebrow.
You'll notice that most women, even those who've read the books and watched the movies will admit that the writing is bad, the story is stupid, the characters are dreadful... but they're still supporting the material, purchasing movie tickets and buying books. Not because it's good stuff, but because that's what they feel like they should be doing to send across the message that they just like any man, can be interested in trashy, sexual things as well.
It's not as though most women actually even endorse the series. Just because they supported it, doesn't mean it's actually their own fantasy. It's more-so an exploration into openly having their own sexual fantasies. However, I think a lot of this has gotten lost in translation. Many men are taking it to mean that women more than ever don't know what they actually want. Thinking that they may say they want to be treated with dignity, but really they want to be treated like trash. I don't think that's accurate.
I think a lot of women simply jumped on this Fifty Shades bandwagon to be part of the collective message that says "women are into sex too, and you men just don't understand us". I just wish that it could have been a better piece of literature for a jumping off place. I actually think Fifty Shades has done more damage than it has helped, in any regard.
In closing, I think the Fifty Shades was an unfortunate novel, that came around at a particularly troubled period in history, only further confusing women's sexually repressed state in society. Sending mixed messages and poor representations of what women want in terms of sex, the ethics of S&M play, and what a glamorous or ideal relationship looks like. It's all a big mess, and I think people often misunderstand what it all means. That's my opinion, anyway.
What Girls & Guys Said
17 53Women want to be dominated and loved when alone with men..
But treated respectfully and loved in public in front of others..
Not applicable on every women..
But applicable on most
.
its simple because that "vapid rich jerk" has looks, money and status. the three things that women are sexually attracted to.
Women had been pushing against sexual repression for many years before 50 Shades came out. Men generally respect sexually liberated women. Any repression that's happening is because of women being shitty to each other. Sorry to be so blunt about it, but the reality is that 90% of women's lib boils down to the way women treat each other.
It's a 'lifestyle' mommy porn series. BDSM 'lite' at best.
We aren't addicted to porn men are more open cause we just don't care but women care about everything that is your issue
You do realise that it was a Twilight Fan fiction that picked up steam and then the story was altered so it would sell right? Where is the argument about Twilight being about repression (rather than just shit)
I don't agree that women have been sexual repressed and men have had more freedom to be open about their sexual interests. What's your evidence for that? I think it's easy to see men being more vocal about sex, but that's not the same thing.
Additionally I think the slaves of the book was more down to the privacy of a digital download. People (or those more Shy about getting caught with porn) could download it without anyone knowing
meh women can still be shamed for sleeping with guys while guys get praised or not criticized. Women being openly lusty or horny or showing skin can be seen as slutty whereas, dudes can get a pass unless he wears something skimpy and then he would just seem gay. double standards both ways.
No its not some type of womens sexual suffrage movement. It is so popular because being dominated by a guy that is vary successful atritive and has a lot of confidence is a major fantasy. Girls want to be treated with respect out side of the bed room when they don't it is just a game extending from the bed room. I am attracted to confident girls. I fantasize about being so desirable that a atractive conifident girl traps me and has her way with me. Unlike most girls I would be ok if it happened! That doesn't mean I won't her to run may life. I think girls are saying it isn't written well and they don't like it because there is a stigma against admitting you like that type of thing. My mom said the book was awful but kept reading the rest of the books lol I wish that the stigma would die because I am looking for a nice confident prity animal loving girl and I would love if she was in to kink. Both Dom and sub.
And those millions, who liked 50 shades? That's because the dude is a ripped middle aged rich stalker, who is CEO of an electronics store and takes advantage of a college graduate Anastasia.
Replace him with a fellow college graduate, who just got into his first internship and all reader's vaginas turn dry like the deserts of Sahara in no longer than a second.
I think we got many women figured out.
But i still praise your efforts for your article.
Now what's better than 50 shades of grey?
"that came around at a particularly troubled period in history" Um... 2011? How were you or the majority of your countrymen, whichever that country was, "troubled" in 2011 unless you lived in Egypt, Pakistan, Libya, Iraq, Afghanistan, or Syria?
Anyway, no one has thought for decades and decades that females don't like sex. It's accepted fact that females want sex, though not as much as males. So...
Shut the fuck up.
I mean seriously she's ridiculous. Feminist are annoying af
Yeah. This might be the woman that kept spamming the question "Is tHeRe ToO mUcH nUdItY iN mOvIeS?". I don't know how she hasn't been banned for constant baiting or spam yet.
I mean maybe it's not her but there aren't lots of anti-male on GaG and even fewer scared to show their face.
Not all wealthy meun are jerks, manipulative, or sadistic. you're way off and women aren't sexually repressed. there's more to the story than just sex. It goes over his own emotionally demons from his childhood;as a result, he treated women the way he felt. Stop being a prude. dig deeper
But then if you want or do the things as the guy in the movie does, you're a stalker and a creep. What is there a double standard?
If only the book was actually a good smut, where there were MANY smut novels beforehand with female protagonists. If only it didn't get popular over the fact it was a twilight cult following for women with serious issues to marvel at as the "sexual minority"
It's a really bad book, and I find it strange anyone would read it unironicly.
It is simply not true that it was the first book to discuss female arousal. Similar literature to the series has been written for decades. Amazon. com has many such "bodice-rippers."
@MiaLinia could not find that page, sorry
Most women's romance novels (a female version of porn) revolve around one concept, a women's submission to a classic alpha male. Fifty Shades is no different.
The popularity of these romance novels demonstrate that at a subconscious level, taking a submissive role to an alpha male is a sexual turn on for women. Although women will not say this in words (as I always say on GAG, listen to what a women does, not what she says).
Many women will argue with this, but also many women have not been in the presence of, or been taken by a true Alpha male. Being involved with an Alpha male makes women subconsciously and naturally submit to him, and that is the biggest sexual turn on for most women - it is also the fantasy that romance novels sell that make them so popular.
It came to fruition with the advent of birth control. now you can fuck and not get pregnant. Biology more so oppressed you than men. 50 shades of grey just capitalized on it. There ffa sex and the city was well before 50 shades.
Seriousily it gave women a chance to enjoy sexual fantasy. I like the smut answer. It was just plsin garbage.
Horse shit!
Women have since at least the 70’s been sexually empowered, even more so than men.
A female can go to a strip club (where women actually suck off the strippers) and it isn’t shamed or ridiculed. It’s seen as “girls having fun”.
Women talk in the media openly about sex and orgasm, without shame or labels.
Women can buy sex toys without shame. They even have sex toy parties.
Men are considered sick perverts for having male sex toys, going to strippers, having sexual fantasy, talking about sex, etc.
So this book was NOT some break out idea of female sexual power... it was just one more type of female smut glorified and accepted by women and the media, which glorified the most popular female fantasy (the rape fantasy).
Why do women love to play the "I'm soooo oppressed" card when it's obvious to both sexes that they are the most entitled and protected group of people to ever exist?
You can downvote, deny, and try to claim anything you want, women are NOT oppressed (in the western world).
That book is a fanfiction of Twilight. Badly written like Twilight and highly overrated. Don´t even let me get started with the movies. Some people don´t read or did only read these books and think they are good written or interesting, but it is actually so bad that not even a real good author would touch these books. They are so bad and not at all accurate.