I still can't admit I had sex to my friends

[Anonymous]

I have 2 really close friends and for whatever reason, I just can't bring myself to finally admit that I went all the way with my boyfriend.

We had sex for the first time 3 months ago, but I'm still having a hard time admitting to myself that that happened, I somehow feel unclean.

I grew up in a cult that banned premarital sex, he respected my wishes, but at some point, I just wanted to do it and I like sex.

Still, it's so uncomfortable for me to admit to others that I had sex... Although it's not a big deal.

I've told them that he's gone down on me, that I love performing oral sex on him, and that we've basically done everything BUT vaginal penetration - why am I having such a hard time admitting it? I really want to be as free as I feel, but something is holding me back.

[ohshee]

See and that's what makes you beautiful and unique is that you don't have to be like other people I think it's cool that you are leader and not a follower because most people need to go the moment after they have it until everybody I think it's cool that you haven't told anybody it's nobody else's business it's a special moment between you two and that's it. I mean think about this you're hanging out with your boyfriend and one of his friends walk up to you and say hey I heard you guys had sex I mean how's that going to make you feel you don't want anybody else to know. Most people think is a tell somebody then it's going to make them look a certain way and yeah that's going to happen. for me anyway I am who I am and I don't need anybody to know my business I don't need to be a big shot I don't need for people to think anyting about me except for who I really am so don't think of yourself as being dirty or anything like that do you understand what I'm saying when you get older but the less people that know the better off you are in the long run I think it's a beautiful thing and I think your leader and I say good job

[myTake Owner]

I'm so glad and proud of my boyfriend that I know that he'd never tell his friends about us being intimate with one another, he respects that sex is our safe space :) He's fine with me telling my friends and would be pleased if I told my friends that he fucks me well/has a big dick (he told me this himself, direct quotes), but I'm way too uncomfortable to talk about that lol. I love the way my friends are slowly accepting my boyfriend and seeing how well he treats me, it's truly beautiful!

[ohshee]

Thank you

[Jamie05rhs]

Points for an interesting question.

Here's what I think:
Are your friends also from the same religious background? Do they believe in abstinence as well? If so, it's probably best not to tell them. Because if they are people of integrity, then they will try to get you to stop what you're doing. That's kind of their job, as sisters and accountability partners.

I'm sorry, because this sounds really bad, but I think you'll just have to continue lying to them. Or otherwise tell them the truth and face the heat.

Though, honestly, they shouldn't have approved of you having oral sex with him, either.


... On second thought, though, I do hate liars. So if I was in their shoes and I found out, I would be done with you. We wouldn't be friends anymore. (Not for the sex. For the lying.). So, considering that, maybe you should just tell them.

Sorry; you're pretty much in a difficult situation all around.

[myTake Owner]

Don't worry about it and don't apologise! My friends, luckily, aren't religious, at least not in my eyes (because I'm used to a pretty insane level of devotion). They don't care about premarital sex - one lost her virginity recently, my boyfriend told me that she and her boyfriend must be having sex, I didn't believe it until she admitted it (she was always a miss goody two shoes but relationships change you in a good way mostly). I think I'll be fine when I tell them eventually - but I 100% won't admit it to my parents lol. They'd straight up break up with me.

[Jamie05rhs]

Okay; gotcha. Well, good luck to you. I hope it works out.

[Jamie05rhs]

Wow- thanks for the MHO! Very kind of you. Much appreciated.

[btbc92]

Asker. What you was taught was correct. Premarital sex is a sin. If it wasn't a send you wouldn't feel like it was bad. If it wasn't a sin, you would be able to admit to your friends at that's what you did. Because guess what. Unless your boyfriend truly loves you and actually marries you, you think that's going to last? You better think about this. It's not a cult. Unless if you grew up in a place that used scripture to twist things, then what you was taught was correct. It is a sin to have sex before marriage. Why? Because sex is a marriage, and marriage is all about having sex. You became one with this man, and you made him your parents that means, you can't have sex with any other man other than this man as long as you to show it. And if you do so, you committed adultery. You have no idea what you just done three months ago. You have no idea how that very serious of your actions have.

You want to live like the world then you must take responsibility and accountability for those choices as the world does. You wanted to make an adult decision be responsible like an adult. Those feelings are Personally Yours. And you got to own up to it. When my friend done the same thing and she confided in me, I told her what I told you. And she knew. And boy to see how to live with it. To this very day she still has to live with that decision. She said if she would have truly known how serious it was he probably would have never done it. And the first person that she was with guess what? We still got to live with seeing him and Hermione. Only by the grace of God With God able to help her get through it. So you really need to decide it but if not you want to fool around with God's design in your life. You decide what path you going to go. The straight and narrow, or the broader the way leading to hell. I'm not telling you that you're going to go to hell. I pray you don't. But if you don't return from this, you don't know what may happen later on down in life. But I can guarantee you right now. If you're already thinking like this, nine out of 10 times this relationship is not going to last that's all I'm going to say. All the people I'm not going to give a damn about you. There's very few people that well, but not everybody would be able to help you. The only one who can help you is God himself, and through Jesus may you be able to actually be able to overcome this. But a decision is still a decision that you made.

only thing I can tell you it's on up like an adult. I'm a virgin for that very reason because I refuse to live with those consequences that you chose to mix. But since you say it's a cult, then hey. All the more reason why you got to live with it, and all the more reason why a lot of people may not take pity simply because you know. And even if you didn't know. They're going to think about living their own life. You now got to focus on living with yours. Your friends don't need to know that you had sex. That's technically none of their business. The only time it's their business it's when it's affecting them concerning about you. Until then, you make your own mind because you're now an adult.

[btbc92]

What you need to understand is the lies you sold yourself. You are not free by having sex the way you are. You are putting yourself in bondage. You know who got freedom? Those who do a God's way, they wait until marriage to have sex, and they are blessed and so damned by God to do what they need to do. Not those who choose to do things nicely. Do you see kids and young adults who've been driving Under the Influence spray because they choose to take a bottle and get drunk and they're driving and now they got to deal with an arrest because God forbid they murdered somebody, that's stuck in a hospital somewhere with broken bones or impaired judgment but God forbid that not only have mental illness, but they caused much damage to their bodies? Do you call it Freedom when you're partying and Harding and God forbid somebody shot, somebody get killed, you're stuck in a hospital somewhere or in jail somewhere because of a reckless decision? You call that freedom? Then you deceive yourself. That's disgusting. The God say that enjoying sex is wrong? Never. He said in First Corinthians chapter 7, it is wise for a man not to marry. But because there's so much sexual immorality, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. It is your right to desire sex. But get married! Not fool around and then when you reach my age. So they can't find a husband because you slept with someone else away. And then you expect them to accept you simply because you're beautiful, because you got status kind of stupid because you have a career, and all this material things that doesn't mean anything. But when you choose to have sex it's a reflection of yourself. That is who a person is going to marry. A person is not going to marry your material things.

[btbc92]

You better really make sure this is a man that you chose to sleep with, who you choose to let to go down on you, I ain't going to let you down, when you need him the most. Because says he already got what she wanted as you say that you wanted by your own admission, he's actually going to be there to the day you both grow old and wrinkled parrot because now if you say oh well I don't care about that, then a, I just hope and pray you really mean it, before those things words come back and be a reflection of what you told to do. What goes up must come down. It's called, for a reason. So with you all the Dreadful, admit that you are. If you're scared, admit that you're scared. If you're confused, admit that you're confused. It is better to tell the truth, then to tell a lie because you have to live with it. Your friend's got to live with their decisions, your boyfriend has to live with his choices, in the end, can you live with your choices? I'm the age I am. I know I can't live with the decisions you make. Whether I'm an adult or not, I got to be responsible for what I choose to do. They don't make me less of a person simply because I choose not to make a mistake. Even if I get married to somebody, I'm still responsible for who I choose to get married too. It's about being smart. And the only ones is going to really make it out of this, all those who are being smart with it.

[btbc92]

Just because you see other people having sex, that doesn't know what time I mean they're being smart because they can have sex with hundreds of people and still make it out of it, you can have sex with that one person who's your boyfriend, and it could be the end of your life. That's why you got those that are blessed, you got those that rely on luck. Where do you put your faith in? Think about it. There's a reason why a lot of people take Life as a gamble. But if you want to be foolish enough to take a risk on your life and you're not smart enough to know what you're risking, then you are a risky Gambler. Not a smart one. Never try to roll a dye, and you're not prepared for the outcome. because if you don't have God by your side, you left by yourself. I can't tell you what to do, or how to live your life. You have free will to choose. All I can say, is that you better wake up before it is too late. You already made the decision. You're going to have to either see this through, or quit. Because there's no going back now. But no matter what choice you choose to make, tell the truth and be honest was just self, before you even think about telling anybody else. Because I got news for you. If you was already doing anal and oral sex before you have vaginal peanut stuff, you already lost your virginity the moment you lost that person to do that. Not when he stuck his penis. Vaginal penis sex is one way, and that is the only way God command sex to be. But if you chose to go any other way, virginity is still lost because innocence has been lost. It's about choice. Not just what you choose to do.

[btbc92]

Because a rape victim can still be clean, even though they've lost the physical part of them. But are you clean and are you whole spiritually and within your soul? You already admitted that you weren't. Not because you was touched. But that you gave consent. the key word here is consent. You cannot blame your boyfriend for making you unclean when you gave the okay for him to do stuff. I'm pretty sure that is not love to bring someone else for something you chose to do. Because unless he enticed him force you to do so by intimidation, you still gave the consent. That is what God is going to look at. That you gave the consent. Again, you're an adult. Grow up, and own it like an adult or people will not be able to respect you. You're not a child anymore, you're not a baby anymore, you are fully capable of handling your own decisions. Mama and papa cannot be there to help you to hold your hand. You can't handle an adult Choice, stay out of adult decisions. Your age has nothing to do with it. Your mentality and your maturity does.

[myTake Owner]

I didn't ask for religious "advice" or guilt tripping. Are you in a cult or a high control group yourself? I can't believe you deemed it necessary to write an essay on why I should feel bad about having sex. That's exactly why I'm no longer religious lol.

[btbc92]

Asker. You told her about religious advice that's why you're in the message it in. I don't have to guilt trip you because you already feel guilty. It's not that you're no longer religious. You would never truly how do you say you grew up in at all because you're a woman of the world. Know what it is is that you yourself as an individual cannot handle your own decisions and you want to blame others for what you choose to do. Know what I'm I am is a child of God. And I serve God. I don't serve religion, neither in my religious parents I said what I said for you as a person. Because I see where you are lacking as an individual that has nothing to do with religion or anybody else but self. No what it is that you're too much of a child and you want to blame somebody else for your problems. Don't blame religion.

[btbc92]

Because there are plenty of people being in their so-called religious or not who do not have your problem. It's just somebody like yourself who can't handle it. It says a lot about you as a person. Not what you grow up with. you feel that guilt because you're unhappy with self and you don't love yourself. What you have is a love problem. Not a religious problem neither do you have a cult problem. But somewhere in your life where you're lacking as an individual. Because you don't understand your own identity as a young woman. That's what your problem is and you think you can find it in sex in a boyfriend and in other people. That's the problem. And now you want to hide and use religion as an excuse for your own inadequacy. So again if that's going to be your attitude that's where you get treated the way you get treated. Because that's your personal insecurities. They have nothing to do with me. I'm stable Within Myself and I grew up with all kinds of problems. You don't see me blame a religion. You made your bed, now lay in it. You're an adult, figure it out. Because the more you want to complain about your problems, the more toxic you become, in the more then enough people are not going to want to be around you because that's how much toxic and negative other person you are. What was so bad based on what you was taught? Nothing. You just want to be like everybody else because you're the one that don't feel like you fit in. Now you want to shame and hurt your friend because of choices you chose to make. I can tell right now based on what you're talkin about, did if he was religious or not, until you get your act together as a person, no amount of changing in and out of it going to help you. What you need to step in counseling. But don't blame religion or whatever you thought you was in. Because nobody can force you to do anything you do not want to do.

[btbc92]

I've been out of church most of my life so I know why you're not so called no longer religious. And trust me it ain't for the excuses you want to tell me. Tell all the other people that BS lie. I know it's what it really is about. So you can get other people to accept you. That's all. I ain't telling you to feel bad. You already feel bad. All I did was addressed a real problem you can't handle for yourself. Only fake people do that. Real people who claim they are religious don't act like what you're acting like. I have more respect for them than I really do for you. At least they're honest. They don't hide. Is that how you going to treat other people, especially your friends, then your friends need to find a better friend. You're toxic as hell.

[btbc92]

And to be honest, it sounds like to me, it has nothing to do with guilt that's holding you back. I believe it's the Holy Spirit that's been telling you you're Crossing too far and you choose to ignore him. Because people that is truly all the world literally have no guilt and no qualms for what they do. So no. You're doing this for all the reasons. I know what those reasons are. Because like I told you prior I have friends who done the same thing you have done, who went through the same trials and the same struggles. And the more you continue the worst is going to get. Do you really want to play with God? Do you really want to play with God? Because he will not play games with you. You need to decide now and choose who you're going to serve and actually mean it and do what you say you're going to do and not fool around with this. Because it sounds like to me you're backsliding. And you don't really want to do what you want to do, but you're willing to play with fire out of curiosity. Like I said I can call my friend right now, as long as she's out of work, and she'll tell me the same thing that I'm telling you. Do you really want to play that game? Because I will promise you this it's not going to end well.

[myTake Owner]

Your grammar and spelling are horrible. I didn't ask to be personally attacked, I'm not unstable or insecure. I'm also not using sex to "fix" myself. I was raised a Jehovah's Witness, which I consider to be a cult because they indoctrinate children, use the INCREDIBLY intense fear of Armageddon as a means to gain members and forbid blood transfusions. I didn't mind the whole no sex before marriage thing until I realised that I prefer to take things at my own pace. I didn't mind spending every ounce of free time I had to gain new members, being criticised for having friends outside of the religion and for not wanting to date within the religion for reasons of my own. I first started to question my religion when I wondered whether I'd want to raise kids in it and realised that I didn't. At all. I've been in therapy for more than 10 years, I frequently talk to someone about all of my concerns. Counselling is useless, you need an actual psychologist to help you. Please, try to form sentences that make sense - I don't even understand half of what you're saying. I'm against organised religion now and no longer believe that God would want to stand in the way between me and the person I love. I had always had a huge problem with the homophobia JWs spread because I always knew that I just didn't care. I don't think a God who IS Love would ban transsexuals from worshipping him :) This is what JWs do though. Homosexuals are fine as long as they don't have homosexual sex. How is that okay? What if I had a kid and it was on the LGBTQIA+ spectrum? I always knew I couldn't stomach kicking them out. Please don't tell others how they feel and how they should lead their life. It's disturbing and pathetic.

[btbc92]

Asker. That's your problem. Not mine. I never attacked you, but you chose to attack me. Never have I told you how to feel. But if you think you're going to gaslight me because you not stable. Not happening. First, of all God is in control You make your own decision but he will not stop you because you bitter and hurt. God isn't caring about your personal beliefs or religion. He cares about t you as his creation and human being in doing the RIGHT THING. You want sex, you get married. Do it outside of marriage, and it's harlotry. That's it. I didn't make the rules. He made the rules. So you can take your hate elsewhere. First of all, other people have nothing to do with you. You be careful who you associate with be it in and OUT of church. It's not religion. It's COMMON SENSE. And you either have it or you don't. And you sound like you just don't. My so-called "grammar" wasn't great because I was voice typing on my phone before. Now I am trying to type with a new keyboard. Who the hell are you to judge? I ain t judging you, but your choices as the bible say we need to do. As far as your other questions I can try to answer them. I will do so as to best as God says for me to say to you. And if you want for me to ask him this I will if he desires to speak to you through me. As far as everything else, you need healing and deliverance because your too much of an angry person to hear sound advice.

[btbc92]

Jehovah's Witness IS a cult, yes. But the word of GOD still remains true. You just need to be in a place where God can truly show you who he is. But doing what your doing is NOT the answer. Everybody is responsible for their own walk and salvation with God in their lives. If a relationship with God is what you truly desire in your heart you have to call for him. Not do things that displease him and hurt him. You have yet to understand yourself as a person and love yourself. I told you before, and you better thank God I can handle you because my friend has done the same at your age. Practically everything and ask me the same question or similar. I will tell you the same answer God had to explain for her. He is in control. He knows your heart, desires, how you feel, thoughts, everything. He made you, he knows you more than I do. Your hurt, you feel rejected and broken, scared and unloved and I understand. But what your doing is destructive to both yourself, this boy, and those around you. He is a man of the world. Your not. But it is your choice to try to mingle with the world but God calls for greater things in your life, but YOU as a person have to desire that and BELIEF the goodness and the love he has for you. YOU have to believe that you are worthy of such, or else that's it. If you lack faith within yourself, how can you expect anybody to help you? But if you continue down this path, you don't want to be like where my friend end up. No virginity and no "first love". She had many boyfriends but only slept with one guy because she didn't want to die a virgin and not be a young bride. In the end, the guy was cheating on her, had the same amount of sexual experiences as your boyfriend and it cost her. It was either God or him. He's now married to another woman who isn't Muslim. Meanwhile, she did get married, but again, because of that 1 mistake... what do you think?

[btbc92]

And I love my friend as a sister. You think it never hurt me how much she would call everyday crying and broken and I would cry because I wished I could have protected her and I couldn't? I suffered indirectly also. God never said he bans those who choose to do that from worshipping him, but he says they cannot enter the kingdom of God with those sins. He KNOWS who they are and who is truly of him. Not everybody who says "Lord, Lord is of him." He requires all of us to CHANGE and be more like Jesus. That's it and to be born again. If you do not go through the same process Jesus went through, then you won't make it to heaven like that unless born again. But this is where his mercy comes in, as he has shown us the way. But you have to have a desire to truly understand what this is about. It is about your soul and where you will go. And what you doing alone may prevent you from doing so. And at the same time, your remodeling this man's salvation also. He is lost. But it is his choice to stay lost. He can change and come to God but he has to want to. If you choose not to, that is your choice. Sex is between husband and wife. Either you follow the rules, or there are consequences you have to live with if you don't stop. As have others I know had to. Psychologists are but human and can only help what they can. The only one who can save you from this is Jesus. If you call out to him, he will hear. BUT YOU have to want to for yourself.

[btbc92]

A drunkard or a homosexual can go to the alter to be delivered from those things and GOD CAN HEAL THEM from it. Because they want to be set FREE. All you sadly did, was gone from one bondage to another bondage. "My people perish for the lack of knowledge." You better get the knowledge and the wisdom before you make reckless decisions. Because if you truly knew what was done, you wouldn't have done this and you would have waited.

[92KixNcereal]

Goddamn Ernest Heming go away with this. It reads as if you’re unsure and trying to convince yourself or at least create a space in which others make it ok to have said conversation or for you to feel safe to give yourself permission to speak on said topic. Cause it seems like you’ve been needing to get that off your chest. Projecting is not attractive. Why the judgement ? The blanketed statements as if the world is black and white? This language is just divisive or at least your tone is and I’m all for one speaking their truth but there’s a difference in “you need Jesus” and “Jesus loves you”. The latter at least is a win win.

[btbc92]

I'm not projecting nothing. If she wants to do what she wants to do that's on her. I at least give a damn about her as I'm certain there's a few people who do. But she's the one that's going to really be in serious Heat oh, and if you go to come right back on here and be crying the blues about how she wish she didn't do what she did. There is no difference in what is being said. She doesn't need Jesus because what I tell him, she's stuck because she don't love herself. And Jesus does loves her, but if she chooses to be in sin, that's on her. It's not a win-win if you end up in hell because you can be loved and you can still make the choice to go there. Everything in life is about choice. And she made her choices. I just hope and pray she really get out of this before it's too darn late because time is running out. I already told her in love. She's the one who has to answer for her choices. Just like I and everybody else does.

[btbc92]

The rescue people could lie to her and she can believe a lie she wants to believe. But I refused to lie to her. And as far as I've been spoken of her, I was told she made her own choices, forgive her for she don't know the things that she does. But she made her choices. She needs to be saved and delivered from her sins and no one can force her to do anything she does not want to do. I don't have to put checked on her anything except for me having some love, and care, and trying to tell her before she goes too far in and she can't get out of it. While the rest of you are condoning what she's doing and then when she's stuck then that's when the rescue dispersed after you start a fire. I know what her behavior is and she needs serious counseling and Psychotherapy at best for whatever trauma that she experienced. But judging from her comments along with other people she's doing it for the hell of it. She ain't doing it for what she's telling you people. She lies to other people actually lies to herself and now she's afraid because you don't want to tell her friends the truth of what she's really feeling she needs help. She doesn't need sex, or else the same girl if God forbid what you already know for a fact once this relationship is over she's going to go crazy and having sex with different kinds of guys because she don't want to listen. I pray not. She just want the actor be like the world, she just want to have a taste of rebellion. That's it. Plenty of girls and some men being a dick Catholic kind of questions, Etc often do this and then after that can't take it anymore then they go right back to it or they get worse. It's not what she was taught that was wrong. There's something not correct with this person. And whatever that is only God can fix it. Even if she's not ready to turn the guard just yet, she still needs counseling. She just wants to be rebellious. And that's what a child does when they can't get their way. So don't feed into her nonsense.

[btbc92]

Because that's how a person like her and that mistreating you because you telling them something that is out of love. They start treating everybody else bad because they don't love themselves. And then when they hit rock bottom and they truly need you then that's when they really want to do right. She needs mentorship, she needs people to talk to her. Because she's crying for help and she don't want to act like she isn't when she is. She will not be making the questions if she isn't crying for help. Because she's being told something that she knows she's doing wrong she wants to go right back into it and then she wants to blame you for what she's getting worse. She's going to do what she's going to choose to do anyway. That doesn't mean I don't love her and it doesn't mean I'm not going to care for her. But she has to want to herself. I'm not going to force her. Sometimes you got to leave them alone in their own darkness in order for them to wake up. But I'm not going to get myself hurt because she wants to hurt other people with her choices.

[ScottStevens]

Best to keep it to yourself. After all it is your private life we are talking about anyway. They do not need to know everything going on in your life at this time.

You really have know idea what they have done or not done either. People brag both ways to feel in the group. The cult thing could also be an issue, best not to rock the boat on that one.

[yougurt]

Why would you need to tell your friends what you do with your boyfriend? That's between you two.-

[myTake Owner]

I'd like to get some advice on specific issues we have, hope that makes sense.

[yougurt]

If they are even more reserved than you, I doubt you'll get any real advice.

[loves2learn]

Just take a deep breath and tell them. You’ll feel better. It will help you in your journey of processing that religious guilt that’s held you back.

[myTake Owner]

That's a good idea. I just feel stupid for having had sex after telling my friends for YEARS that I'd wait until after getting married - now I'm the second on to have lost my virginity lol. It feels weird.

[loves2learn]

It’s your body you can change your mind whenever you like. Nothing wrong with that. I said I’d never breastfeed my child past 2. Then he turned 2 and I still was. Then he turned 3 and I still was. I learned an important lesson not to say I’m never going to do something I don’t know anything about.

[myTake Owner]

That makes sense... Thanks!

[loves2learn]

Of course! :)

[Sam_The_Savage]

@loves2learn always give best advice related to sex. She is my favourite. 😘❤️

[loves2learn]

Awww thanks @sam_the_savage so sweet to say

[Sam_The_Savage]

Your welcome gorgeous 😘 Your guy is lucky to have you. @loves2learn

[loves2learn]

You’re very sweet to say that. I have to say, at age 18 when I met him I had not had any advances for any guys in over a year. I was going a bit batty tbh. All I can think is they thought I was too innocent. But they thought wrong. 😈

[Sam_The_Savage]

Wait what? You're with him from your teen age? Wow. Wow. Wow. Ofc the heart like you only luckiest guy will get. He can't afford to lose u. 😘

[loves2learn]

@sam_the_savage yes. 20 years now. I know. We can’t lose each other.

[Sam_The_Savage]

It's just wow. You're gem ❤️🌹

[loves2learn]

@sam_the_savage thank you. Prior to that I was a lost 17 year old girl who hadn’t gotten any action in a year and was seriously wondering what was wrong with her. Good for thought.

[loves2learn]

Ugh. FOOD. GAG autocorrect sucks balls.

[Sam_The_Savage]

You have charm that you can make any man melt for heart like you. ❤️❤️ 😘❤️🌹Never seen heart like u ever in my life.

[loves2learn]

Thanks Sam. That’s really sweet. Hasn’t always been that way...

[Sam_The_Savage]

Now I'm jealous from your hub. Uff where I can find heart like u. ? 😔

[loves2learn]

Dunno hun. I am who I am. ❤️

[Sam_The_Savage]

It's next to impossible to me find heart like you. You're rare babe 😘❤️

[loves2learn]

You are sweet Sam, thank you.

[Sam_The_Savage]

❤️😘 you're someone dream comes true moment. ❤️

[MrNameless]

That's fine. You don't have to tell them about your personal sex life anyway. Not exactly common or expected to tell anyone about your sex life other than your partner.

[hellionthesagereborn]

The trauma probably, you grew up with it being taboo so its so ingrained in you that your still fighting that "programing" so to speak.

[myTake Owner]

Yeah, definitely.

[rachel776]

if you told them you blew him and he went down on you, i don't think they'll be too surprised you fucked him

[NyceGuyFinishingLast]

Honestly, it is none of their business. The only reason someone would openly advertise their sex life is for attention or bragging rights.

[myTake Owner]

I'd love to get some advice though. Also, my friends are a bit naive when it comes to sex and me and my boyfriend dealt with quite a lot of obstacles before finally being able to enjoy it.

[NyceGuyFinishingLast]

Shoot me a message

[TommyMountainFigure]

Well then, there lies your problem. If you can't tell them without you thinking they will judge you they aren't real friends.

[melanieeeB]

You don't have to tell anyone... I always regretted telling my friends something like that, well for different reasons but still you're not obligated to tell them about your sexlife. They don't need to know, do you and be happy, it's no ones business

[Alyssa11]

If it’s consensual there’s no problem honestly. But you shouldn’t do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. If you don’t want to tell your friends then don’t tell them.

[myTake Owner]

It's definitely consensual, I love having sex and to be honest, we're pretty bad at it but still do it almost every day - I just feel like it's really hard to talk about being horny as a girl, does that make sense? My friends aren't nearly as open as I am about their sexuality, and I'm extremely sexually repressed, so that honestly says a lot about them in my opinion...

[Alyssa11]

You feel bad because we’ve been trained all these years by society and sometimes within our social circles that a woman can’t be horny. It makes us a whore. Indeed we get just as horny as men (if not more sometimes), and it’s biological nature to be. It’s completely normal! So I’m glad you’re enjoying exploring sex with your boyfriend :)! I think some people are a bit more reserved than others. I’m really comfortable with talking about sex but I also have some friends who aren’t. I totally understand what you mean.

[myTake Owner]

Yeah, that resonates with me. My boyfriend is really comfortable with talking about sex with me, but he's really uncomfortable around my friends, fairly comfortable but reserved with his friends and I think I don't like talking about sex with his friends either, because I know that they're complete noobs lol.

[Tim-S]

Talk about sex with your boyfriend, but forget talking to everybody else about your sex life. No need.

[The_Maphio]

Depending on how old you are, it might be a good thing. Younger people, especially in the teenage years, tend to put everything into competition, especially things related to relationships or sex.
If you're the first of your group to have had sex and you have someone competitive or easily slipping into senses of inferiority among you, you might set off an involuntary mechanism that will have them toss themselves at the first horny mofo for the sake of being on your own level. Useless to say the experience could be less than good.
Good thing that you did as you pleased instead of waiting for marriage (since it's pretty silly, and you don't really know if your current partner is the one you'll end up marrying. Unforeseen events might happen).
All in all, you did well enjoying your life as part of a couple, which includes sex as an inscindible part, and also to not have told your friends about your escapade, as a form of protection.

[rosemilk]

You don't need to tell your friends your personal sex life... I wouldn't wanna hear it... 🌸

[Paige90]

Questions:
1/ How old are you?
2/ How old are they?
3/ How they ever had sex with anyone?
4/ How many times have you had sex with him?
5/ How big is his dick?
6/ Do you get totally naked with him?
7/ How old is he?
8/ Are you his first?

[RawIronhide]

You need to understand that you think a certain way because it's been taught to you by your culture. If you felt right about it and you were responsible that's all anyone can hope for. Sex is good! Although it can be done irresponsibly.

[myTake Owner]

I grew up in the US, but I'm a daughter of Jehovah's Witnesses, so I have to deal with an immense deal of sexual repression. I felt 100% right about having sex, I loved it, we were responsible, so I'd say we definitely did it right ;) Loved everything about it.

[NorthAfrican]

You don't need to tell them some things are best kept private.

[jshm2]

You're uncertain with yourself and the relationship. The guy probably didn't make you feel loved and praised as you thought he would with you giving into him as you did.

It happens, just don't put out as easily in your next relationship.

[myTake Owner]

You're mistaken. I felt very loved, he praised me, I praised him - sex has deepened our relationship and our respect for one another. You can't really think you know someone from a few words, right?

[BakedBeanieBabie]

it isn't necessary for you to.

[ayari]

You have to make a careful decision about such a thing like that

[myTake Owner]

What do you mean?

[shiril]

In life we come across a situation where we are so stressed that we need an outlet - need some one who unconditionally accept us. Our Emotional Quotient drained out, in that situation a step forward - body mechanism find its way... to maintain psychological balance

[Alpha09]

It sounds like you went through some brainwashing that is still plaguing you. I promise your not dirty, sex is perfectly natural. You don't need to tell them unless you decide that's something your comfortable with.