Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
Every single time I talk to my girlfriends, it turns into quite a debate. That is because they wonder why their men are so inclined to watch porn or even have a straying eye, when their ladies lay on the bed like a starfish and expect sex to just happen. I am appalled when I hear my girlfriend, Vicki tell me that sometimes she is too tired for sex, so she just tells her man to "do as you please, and lets hurry up i'm tired". Needless to say, she can see that this ruins the mood. So from my experience and those close to me, here are some things I have learned over the years.
1. Myth: Men should initiate sex 100% of the time.
Of course a woman likes to feel loved, chased and wanted... but a man does too! A woman should initiate sex once in a while and make the man feel that he is valued and loved in the relationship. By a man's nature he would want to take the lead anyways.
2. Myth: Men should do all the work during sex 100% of the time.
A man loves to show his manly side by taking charge and dominating his woman for the most part. However, a woman can be on top once in a while and spice things up by doing some of the fun sexual work!
3. Truth: Men like women to be enthused about sex, and not just "get it over with".
Nothing turns off a man like a woman who looks like she is enduring an unpleasant experience. In fact, a woman should show her enjoyment and appreciation for a man. Of course a woman can get tired, but perhaps a late night coffee is the key to keeping things vibrant again.
What Girls & Guys Said
46 67I've had a similar discussion to this with a galpal of mine on here.
We picked out a number of the girls we imagined would be starfish, and we're in pretty close agreement about who these might be.
No way to prove it, of course, but an interesting discussion, nevertheless...
Can I see the list?
@Tomblebee I'm sorry, no. That would be breaking a confidence.
Can you at least tell me if I'm on it?
@Tomblebee Yep, you're not on it, rest assured.
If i'm resting assured isn't that resting like a starfish tho?
Great take!
Great points!
I've been always passionate and enthusiastic. If I'm tired I say so, but when I'm ready I'm into it!
Yeah except they can afford to do so because there will still be guys out there who will want to get laid with them.
True, some who don't care and some who don't know if they would able to find a better girl.
I just close my eyes and think of England.
Porn is free and far more convenient. Women don't want sex, why trouble them? 70% of men 18-40 are single and this trend won't change anytime soon.
lol they do just not with average dudes
@TheUglyMan I know right?
I love this take, but I also love the title. Very creative! :D
I prefer for her to go after what she wants.
Well this take is not very good most of the points didn't make sense since no many girls just sit there like a starfish and tbh for someone to believe that it's just dumb. Plus some men might actaully like this. This take had no point to it all.
Not to be ageist... you're 16. The only thing you know about sex is word of mouth, and if you have personal experience then i would REALLY like a word with your parents.
@BaileyisDarcy well i have do have a personal experience and my experience have been the other way around for me the girls have been a lot of enthusiastic. And do quite a lot work so... Also yes i am 16 i am legal age were i live so... Also everyone these days have sex at with the new generation. I am 17 in like 3 days which means i am only 3 years younger so don't give me that your younger bs.
4 years younger. 21 this year. And i can give that younger bullshit, i at least waited until i was legal. Not consent wise, adult wise. And by the way, most people aren't having sex in the new generation, theyre just saying they are cause they think it looks cool, like kids wearing designer jeans cause it makes them look rich.
@BaileyisDarcy umm yes the new geration do. Also the whole age you still can't give me that cause we could both actaully been in exactly same collage because of age diffrence. And many people have sex under age so... And like i have already said it was legal. All i am saying is from my experiance this whole take is wrong and for many people it will be the same and for some it won't so this question was dumb. I don't think anyone read this and went or yeah i should stop being like a starfish
Maybe you should GO to "collage" now and then instead of focusing on your dick. You might actually learn how to spell it. And just because people SAY theyre having sex, doesn't mean they are.
@BaileyisDarcy lol great insult not since i am dexylixc so i can't spell vey well if i wanted to, and yep totally always forcusing on dick, so your saying people in collage never have sex wow i never heard of a more dumb thought ever. Also you saying just because they say they had sex but it don't mean they have. Well i guess you have never had sex and i never have or anyone by that logic. You gonna walk up to teenager who is pregant and say well you say you had sex but that don't mean you did. Lol great ass logic
My god this is why i dont talk to most kids your age.
@BaileyisDarcy hahaha
Regarding the first point, I want to add one more point. Who should initiate sex? Whoever feels like they should have sex FIRST, doesn't matter who it is. If you feel like you need it, let your partner know ASAP.
Short but great myTake!
Pretty accurate Take. Participation is always better than just being a participant. I will say that it's hard to find guys that are willing to let the girl be the dominant one. They don't want you to be a starfish but they also don't want you with too much control lol. Or so it seems.
What part of 'once in a while' you didn't understand? so ya a girl can take more control and initiate more without being the one who is more dominant in general. :)
@Berethor sure thing bud
bleh, "once in a while". How much control is a girl taking and doing. That's such a far reach that, because she's doing something a once in a while it prevents her from being dominant. A woman would have to be close to even with doing the work which "once ina while" just implies a little. like the ratio would still be 90/10 or 80/20 male control. Whereas you can still have it more to the middle and man still in control like 60/40, but she's almost meeting him half way with dominance and control. And I don't mind women taking control and being dominant, because I don't have to prove my dominance. I know I can dominate and give a good stroke, why do I have to always prove it? I'm stronger, but sex isn't a competitio, I hope it's not because dominance or submission, it's consensual. If it's not, then it's going off another end. So feeling I have to prove my dominance through sex as a man is like beating a woman in arm wrestling and then being like "aha! look how strong and manly I am! lol
@brennanhuff nice thought process.
media1.tenor.com/.../tenor.gif
My wife in a nutshell.
ngl, I do it too sometimes.
Can be worse, like what @alyxo222 is planning to do to her future husband.
Am I crazy for wanting a sexless relationship /marriage? ↗
@Berethor sex is disgusting. We would never sleep in the same bed or do anything in the same bed ever. How unsanitary.
@alyxo222 I see your point but sex doesn't have to be unsanitary assuming you bath before and after and wash your sheets regularly. Also a unicorn can only be tamed by a virgin, so there's that.
In regards to myth number 1, it has to do with men’s primal instinct to spread their seed. That’s why men are labeled as the initiators and why men are believed to be more visual on average than women are.
All three points are true but when we reach the crescendo at the end of intercourse...
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=md9ImEkV2_cI PREFER she just lay still, hold on tight and let me control speed and drive.
Well.. this read was awesome! So true!
i have nothing for you by my utter respect young lady
Well, its NOT going to change. That's for sure.
Men have sex for sex and women have sex for confidence, to get close, offered as a reward, career, acceptance, etc.
There is always some reason in the mix.
When you havef sex often with the same person there is no reason thus bringing the starfish out of women.
Make Love, not sex.
could care less... I can finish either way.