My mom saw my nudes and the dirty texts I sent to my boyfriend and other text I sent to pple I feel disgusted of myself I don't know what to do?

[amel23]

I left my fb open at my parents house then my mom read the text i sent to my boyfriend and most of them were sexting and nudes and then she read msgs I sent to my friends and among them someone I met first I joined gag ago when I was having a bad time and I wanted someone to talk to so i told him about stuff and how my Son's professor and my friend tried to rape and bad stuff at college i was talking and he was asking for nudes so I felt he doesn't give a fuck and stopped it was 2 months ago
Then today she showed up at my house saying I'm a slut and this is not the daughter I raised then she kept saying why didn't you tell me about it why do u always laugh and makes it look like everyone is great but u r a mess she wanted to know who was the professor and I'm just freaking out I don't know what to do anymore I feel soo disgusted about myself I don't want to ever look her in the eyes I feel bad and terrible and she told my dad I hate everything I don't know what she will do will she go talk to the professor I don't know I'm just scared of everything she kept asking did he do if I'm just tired I'm over this I don't want this I don't want her to look at me that way I reaaally reaaly feel disgusted by myself
I never share stuff with her not bc I hate I love her its just bc she's soooo sensitive and I don't want to see her cry I can take being hurt but I don't want her getting upset for my problems I don't want to he a burden I wasn't an easy normal child to raise I don't want to bother her
Now she took a week off work to check on me everyday saying she didn't t
Cake fare of me enough I really don't know what to do I'm just tired and tbh I don't want to see her everyday and feel filthy I don't know how to explain it I don't know what she would be thinking when she sees me anymore

[InfoBot]

If your mom genuinely loves you then she will love you and be proud of you regardless of anything that she's seen. Her calling you a slut was wrong, that is not the job of a mother. That is not constructive, it's not helpful. If she wants to protect you from harm then she'd be better off talking to you about her concerns and making it clear that she is only doing it because she loves you.

Sending nudes and intimate texts does not make you dirty or a slut, it makes you a human being. You're an adult, you're allowed a sex life. It may not be her thing but it's not her business. She's had a sex life too. She can't pretend like she's some kind of saint or like she doesn't know what it is to be turned on. Don't accept that kind of shit, don't put yourself down for being a normal human.

You need to talk to your mom about this professor and make sure that she doesn't do anything without your consent. You are not a child, it's your decision to make if anything is done. She can advise you but she can't just go over your head. She needs to realise that you're grown up, you're not her little baby anymore. You have to be allowed to make your own decisions and your own mistakes.

[amel23]

U r right but I kind of hate myself

[InfoBot]

You shouldn't. Yes it's embarrassing but don't turn it into some kind of crime that makes you disgusting. Look at all the celebrities who had their photos hacked, they've had their nudes seen by thousands if not millions. It doesn't make them sluts. They are entitled to a private life and the smart ones don't apologise for it either. Yes they feel disgusted that their privacy has been abused but they don't feel disgusted at themselves, nor should they.

[amel23]

Its my mom u don't understand

[InfoBot]

I'm sure that anyone can understand what it's like to have parents and to be embarrassed in front of parents.

[5x9BOB]

First of all relax. Take deep breaths and relax. Second, know that the cat is out of the bag. Now remember your Lessons Learned in Life... You can only take care of what you have control of. Things you have done you can only take responsibility for. Now just because you are the person that you are does not mean you are not the light of your Mother's or Father's Eyes. Take responsibility for it stand up for what you said stand up for what you believe. You are old enough to make your own decisions and as long as you meet their criteria for school there should be no repercussions by them. Not only is this a lesson and your own personal security, but this should be a lesson in your owning yourself. Don't be distraught they are your opinions, actions and above all feelings and emotions. By now they should know they've raised you the best they can now it is your turn to make yourself the best woman you can make yourself. I believe you're doing a good job. Stay strong... Let me hear that Roar

[5x9BOB]

And just stink in like 10 years from now you will be laughing at Christmas on how your mom saw your shit on your computer LOL I promise you that will happen and you will never forget it. Haha

[amel23]

Thank u a lot

[missynot]

You have to understand that she is your mother. One of her roles is to protect you, the whole you, inclusive of your body. There are a lot of pervs that has spread across the globe and who knows what they will do to your photos. She's just frustrated and scared, but that doesn't mean she doesn't love you anymore. She does actually. Charge it to experience as always. And stop sending nudes, you don't know when someday that can be used against you.

[Purple_Babe14]

Your mom is saying all this stuff about you, but lets just be honest, you don't know what kinky stuff she did when she was your age, and won't admit to... no one is perfect.

[Purple_Babe14]

thanks for MHO:)

[deraz24]

All you can do is live hell how did you get here? It wasn't bc she didn't do anything at all, it was to a boyfriend y'all will be alright

[amel23]

I hope so

[deraz24]

She'll get over it I see if you we're crazy young but you're not. Whatever you do you're grown and at least you're not doing porn lol that would be different

[amel23]

Lol yes at least I'm not doing porn I'm still relatively good

[deraz24]

Lol its always a bright side

[lexythelou22]

If my mom called me a slut to my face, I'd cut her the fuck out of my life. Mother or not, you don't talk to someone that way.

[amel23]

I can't cut her out she's is my mom

[lexythelou22]

That's understandable, just how I'd personally handle it.

[lexythelou22]

Also, you're over 18. It's none of her business if you're kinky with a guy.

[amel23]

U don't understand I feel I'm no good

[lexythelou22]

But I do understand. You shouldn't feel "no good" because you've had relations with someone. You are an adult woman. Sexting and sending nudes does NOT make you a slut. It does not make you a bad person. It doesn't make you anything but a woman with sexual desires, which most of us have.

[amel23]

I feel bad I don't want her to see me that way not her I loved being innocent in her eyes

[Cornchipuniverse]

I'd i cut my mom out life when i was in the fourth grade, then you can to.

[amel23]

@Cornchipuniverse my mom is a great person I wouldn't

[Cornchipuniverse]

Not if she calls you a slut for doing things as an adult that she probably did in highschool with your father

[Red_Arrow]

Lots of confusion in your question. You list your age as 21 but talk about your son’s professor. If your con is old enough to have a professor, then you have to be older than 21. But at any age over 21 you are old enough to make your own decisions and run your own life. i understand being embarrassed about her seeing all that, but why are you disgusted with yourself? If you find your actions disgusting it should not change because you mother saw them or not.
You say your son’s professor and a friend of yours tried to rape you. Anybody trying that is terrible, but a friend? And someone connected with your son? That is disgusting. It is also not your fault and you should not feel badly about yourself over it.
If you want to change, then list what you want to change and stick by that list. Perhaps even ask your mother for help with that. If she sees you improving yourself, she will start trusting you again.

[Red_Arrow]

If you do not want to change, then she will have to accept that you are old enough to make your own decision. But she will not like them and you will lose her trust and her friendship. She cannot accept a lot of what you do. But that does not make you bad. Nudes and “dirty” texts are fairly common and do not make you bad. Do not disparage yourself over 5em.

[amel23]

No i meant the son of my professor he is at my college we talked and he said he will explain subjects to me bc he's older and his dad is a professor u see

[Red_Arrow]

And he tried to rape you?

[amel23]

Yes it was 2 months ago I'm fine now

[ohshee]

Well I don't care who it is we've all been there we've all that it or thought it so let her think what she wants nothing you can do about it nowyou can't tell me. she's never had a sexy or seductive or naughty thought before

[SnapTsch]

I'm sorry
There's no way out of this than to swallow the pill,
I really feel bad for you, but there's nothing that can make things better.

[ladsin]

Haha shit happens. My buddies mom walked in on him jerking it 😂

[amel23]

Tbh I feel like shit its not funny she used to think I'm an angel not anymore

[ladsin]

Yeah, it sucks, not denying that. There's nothing you can do to change it though

[micheal727jovanie]

My brother saw my dick pic fuck it Its normal who gives a fuck what anybody thinks

[amel23]

My sister saw them 2 but no this is my mom its a lot different and I was saying dirty stuff its really disgusting

[VirginiaBeachBum]

Sorry, I had to stop reading about 3 lines into that giant run-on "sentence."

[amel23]

What

[VirginiaBeachBum]

Punctuation helps greatly in understanding what you are trying to say. Some paragraph breaks would help, too.

[amel23]

I understand I just feel most times I try just to talk not so pple can read what I say

[VirginiaBeachBum]

But you are on a medium which people are reading what you say. That said, from what I was able to gather, I wouldn't worry about it. She couldn't have expected you to remain a child forever. If you only knew things I saw my daughter had sent to boyfriends, you wouldn't be worrying abut this.

[bopeep0388]

Too long didn't read. But from the title...
1. she shouldn't have betrayed your privacy.
2. Lesson 1 in why you shouldn't sexy pics. If he wants it he can wait. Always got me goin with women if they made me wait and work for it.

[amel23]

He lives in the next town I can't make him wait all week

[bopeep0388]

Yeah you can. If he is worth you then yes you can. The entire human race survived up until 60 years ago having to be happy with post office mail. Just because you can doesn't mean you should. And you are 21... get a car.

[amel23]

I have a car and I can't drive there everyday my classes start at 8 end at 6 pm and some days I have night shifts and homework

[bopeep0388]

Well you are an adult do that leaves 2 things left to say, your mother is bang out of order and needs to realise that you are an adult with kinks and all. Trust me ur mother probably has kinks too.. And deal with it. Life is full of moments that will result in you disappointing someone. And there is no going back from it. Your mum knows you're a sexual demon now. And worse... she might expect grandkids

[Shzzam]

Well you're 21 years old so you can make your own life choices. However if you're going to do things like that at other people's houses you should be more careful with concealing it.

[Purple_Babe14]

Yeah, her mom evaded her fucking privacy too, like really. She should have told her " I'm a grown ass adult, you're not allowed to go through my stuff like that"!.

[lord_chilled]

@Purple_Babe14 wow, kids these days. "muh privacy" Your parents are here to protect you, and until you are an adult you are gonne do stupid sh*t sometimes. Put some respect on your parents, if everyone did that, them you wouldn't have the whining, victim-mentality having, entitled, narcissitic, r*tarded degenerates you see today

[Purple_Babe14]

@lord_chilled Wtf I'm talking about her mom envading her privacy. I respect my parents all the time, so stop trying to preach to me dude. My parents always envade my privacy but I don't care because I am a minor, make sure you read my comment properly before you comment... smh

[lord_chilled]

@Purple_Babe14 i read it and thats exactly what i meant. she's her mother. Its not an offense to invade her privacym she is just looking out for her kid. The internet is not exactly a nice , safe space. Just because she is 21 doesn't automatically make her different from how she was to her mom at 20, 18 or 16. Im 22, and my parents still tell me not to walk alone at night when i tell them im going to the gym at 9 pm. At 9 pm! But am i complaining about it? No its normal for them to care about me. I just think its ridiculous that you use terms like "invading her privacy" And apparently her mom was right too. There was things there which she might have had to talk with the asker about.

[Purple_Babe14]

@lord_chilled That's like if she got mail delivered at her mom's house and her mom opened it. Her mom could get into a lot of trouble, because her daughter is still no longer a minor. I know now matter how old I get that my parents will go through my stuff, but that does not mean it was right for her mom to do it.

[lord_chilled]

@Purple_Babe14 and thats the kind of thing which i fimd is messed up. I think in this situation , it was definitely right of her to do it.

[AndrewMG]

Look on the brightside a role reversal would be worse! To be fair, I think it's less psychologically damaging for the parents to see their son's/daughter's nude picture's and text than the son/daughters seeing a parent''s nude text and messages! lol

[MLGbreezy]

Hmm i fell like your mom overreacted about you sexting your boyfriend its your boyfriend everyones done girl or guy and i think the best course of action is probably to talk it out with her she will come around cause she loves you she took time off work to make sure you were ok that says enough but calling you a slut was still out of line and i know your scared but you gotta confront her and ask her to accept the real you the stuff you did is nothing to be ashamed of be brave and as for that proffessor he is a real dickhead do if she does confront him its probably a good think just think how many other girls he's probably tried to take advantage of anyway just be brave and talk with her besides its not like she didn't do it when she was your age

[genericname85]

well you're not innocent in a sexual way, what's so bad about that? i know it feels bad to disappoint "expectations" others may have but really what you do is what you want so as long as it makes you happy, you shouldn't consider it a bad thing just cause society seems to frown upon it.

[Adam_INTJ]

You have to decide whether what you did is acceptable or not.

If it's not acceptable, then admit to her that you are ashamed and that the things you did are truly despicable.

If it is acceptable, then just ignore your mom and treat her opinion as though it doesn't matter.

[lostliam34]

There isn't anything you can do. We can't change the past. Its not uncommon for people to share nudes and talk dirty when in a relationship. Its going to take time for her to grow past this. There is no simple fix. Im sorry men tried taking advantage of you but that is something to take care of. she's right to be angry aboit them trying to hurt you.

[lord_chilled]

She is a woman too. She would understand. Just go tell her everything.
The most hurtful thing for a mother is when she feels her kid has to hide something from her.
I have done that too and my mom was upset too.
Just go and make pease with her. Tell her everything, tell her you are sorry. Its ok if you cry.
She may feel angry now, but you will always be her angel.
So dont worry

[amel23]

Thank u

[lord_chilled]

Your welcome and dont worry 😊

[Kat_puppies]

stop it you are 21 don't let your mom tell you what to do send them nudes girl

[raushan123]

She is your mother. She loves you. She will understand you n forgive you for everything. judt tell her everything. She is feeling sympwthic for what happened to you. just tell her everything

[lord_chilled]

This

[sorage]

Say that's normal at your age , that you are an adult and responsible and your sex life doesn't concern her? Good luck x)

[Abhineetshukla]

She is a mother and wanted you to be safe from any harm

[kdhingra307]

You can't do anything, literally

[amel23]

I want to make her forget or smthg

[kdhingra307]

Sorry I am a person who knows some stuff around psychology and human consciousness. I can say it's not possible in an instant But rate may be increased, if u wanna know how

[kdhingra307]

@amel23 what ur update means?

[SilverRain92]

Your mother should accept the real you. It would hard to do but there is no way and you should help her to do it.
Have a talk with her instead of trying to avoid communication because you feel ashamed. Tell her that you are an adult, you have a private life and libido which is pretty normal for a girl. I support her wish to contact the professor because if not to make his son to take responsibility he may try to rape someone else. It's difficult to do I can't even imagine what would I do in such situation and I know you want just to forget about everything and to pretend that it has never happened.

[SilverRain92]

But the reality is that you like kinky conversations with your boyfriend. Personally I don't see anything wrong with it if you love your boyfriend. You didn't cheat on him, so it's nothing to be ashamed of. Your mom should try to love a real you not an ideal daughter she created in her imagination. Tell her that you love her and appreciate her support (she obviously tries to support you). And ask her to accept a real you and the fact that you are not a child anymore.