Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
I know everyone has their own beliefs and I am stating mine because I’m in a current battle with my S/O about pornography and viewing women.
Let’s face it, EVERYONE and literally I mean everyone has had some sort of struggle with pornography.
Pornography these days is so widely accessible whether it's videos on some porn site or magazines at the local convenience store and DVD’s. Women and men both can be insecure about their bodies, the person may not be perfect and they know it, it is quite bothersome enough having to deal with some imperfection. Especially like “I’m not beautiful enough for him/her.”
My husband once belonged to a webcam site, a well known one is all I will say, he used to go on it from time to time while he was truck driving, that’s fine because I don’t need to know about it, it wasn’t bothersome or harmful at that point.
One time while he was at home it was early in the morning, I used to sleep in never used to get up with him, I guess it may have bothered him a little (keep in mind I am no longer like that now). He was feeling in the mood, and instead of coming to me and waking me up at 3 AM in the morning he chose to go on the webcam site. I told him, I don’t care if it’s 3 in the morning if you’re in the mood you can come to me instead of looking at crap like that.
I get it if you’re single but if you have someone to be intimate with, there is no excuse unless you both agree to it and watch it together.
As I said...
With my husband it is an on-going battle I feel I may never win because he is stubborn as hell, I know he is still viewing naked women and it bothers me because he has me. If someone he wants to see has naked pictures leaked he will go and look and hide it from me.
Hiding it from your partner!? That is a no-no in a relationship; it’s like you’re lying to them and stabbing them in the back. This morning for instance he was talking to me on the phone just before work and something in his voice didn’t sound right, I must admit I snooped (I know big mistake)
So I checked his Google History with YouTube because he is using that as a way to look at naked women, lately it’s been “Naked Yoga” where you see everything on most videos, I asked him what he was up to. Because he just didn’t sound right so I knew something was wrong and he was doing something. He responded with “looking at all the crazy people outside” meanwhile I seen the search result and the video “Naked Yoga”.
He also asked me what I was accusing him of, I wasn't accusing I was asking and he got his defence up for no reason (Big Flag right there)
Pornography hurts relationships (marriages) mostly if you had already discussed it, and I don’t like this because it hurts me knowing you’re looking at it, or you're lying about it. Because he and I previously had a discussion about it hurting me especially since he is doing it behind my back. Also a long time ago I had asked him not to do it and he said he wouldn't, another lie. I also had asked him how would he feel if I put him in the same position, he said "probably the same"
Lying is really bad in a relationship, there should always be honesty and if you can’t be honest with your partner you shouldn’t do it.
What Girls & Guys Said
22 42Why would he hide it from you? I would rather watch pornography together and have an open discussion... :o
It sounds like more of a trust issue. Like if it wasn't porn it would be something else. You clearly don't trust him, and with good reason since he lies. I feel like it's deeper than porn.
This dude needs serious help; send him to rehab.
Porn addiction is a recognised mental disorder according to Britain's national health service and is damaging to both your physical and mental health.
Does he talk to the girls on those webcam sites?
He used to... I put a stop to that a long time ago
not the 'talking to them' part but the whole live webcam shows... ugh
So basically your plan for your relationship with your husband is to bend him to your will, because you feel insecure about him watching pornography?
Have you ever bothered to actually ask a man why he watches pornography? And whether he is able to tell the difference between pictures on a screen and real life?
No but there should be no room for pornography in a marriage for him or for me. If you have a wife or a husband there should be NO need.
That is an ignorant view of pornography. Pornography fulfills a different need. It's about fantasy. Do you outlaw other forms of fiction in your marriage too? Like movies and novels? The problem here is that you have low self-esteem and think that your husband looking at pornography reflects badly on you. No it doesn't. It has nothing to do with you.
No I don't but there is no room for pornography and it is staying that way he knows it
Poor guy. Don't envy him. Imagine being that whipped.
okay then let me put it to you this way then... Wouldn't you rather have sex any day of the week or any time then watch stupid porn?
Sure, but variety is nice. If you shack up with someone for life, that can turn into a routine.
that's like saying oh i like to do other women, what that statement replies... seems like your not in a relationship.
Well, the point is your husband chooses to not fuck other women and get an outlet for those desires through porn. Meanwhile you offer him something different, something deeper, a human being. Again, it's like comparing real life to watching a movie.
your supposed to talk about desires with your partner, even if your fetish so happens to be you want to... play rape example since i know that's a lot of people's get up and go fetish lmbo
What if his desires include porn?
Nah porn doesn't effect me negatively. Me and my boyfriend watch porn, sometimes we even discuss it. But I like my body with all it's curves, and I'm not jealous of porn stars. I feel like a lot of women that have an issue with their men watching porn are just super insecure in themselves, and that's not fair to them, especially if you don't feel like having sex. I think it's true that porn can lead to unrealistic expectations, but if you have an open discussion with them it shouldn't cause an issue.
Wow... u r lucky that u've star as a girlfriend... nourish the experience... if u r a shy person then break up would be a nice option.
Does that mean your against me?
Nope but
Couldn't figure out... Its an addiction, if he's willing to change and all I mean its a battle... we are Christian so its harder... I don't really believe in porn use because it destroys everything.. I mean look I can't trust if he is looking at porn or not.. I need to find some way of getting him help.. We are married and in this together
Even if it hurts me being the wife but it normally would hurt anyone of being with someone whom has an addiction of any sort
Thank you for sharing. All the best!
It seems to me anyone who is against their partner watching it or even if you are single and you are against other people enjoying it in the comfort of their own home. You are a selfish person. It is in no way cheating, it does not effect your partner, it does nothing to you.
If you are someone who restricts their partner from viewing porn or even micromanages their life in that way. You are a very jealous person. NOW, if it was a person they were watching in the same room, or having an affair with, THAT would be completely different.
But those people who are against porn, make no sense to me. Hell, they even talk and make jokes about it on Real Time with Bill Maher and The Tonight Show with Stephen Colbert. So if you are this much against porn, I can only assume you are deeply conservative. Maybe you aren't, but it sure sounds like it.
Go ahead and vote this down, doesn't matter to me.
Yep, spot on. What I've been saying for 10M replies here now on GAG.
GET OFF THE PORN!! It ruins normal man-woman romantic sex and relationships. And it's ALL fake.
A stead diet of fake sex porn makes guys think all women like anal, deep throating, facials, and group sex. Total FAIL. You see it in the questions here. Pfft.
Well, there are lots of kinds of porn. Some are extremely real, with no fake sounds or anything of the sort. Also, it's very common myth that majority of women don't enjoy anal at all. A more common myth is that men want it more than women.
@Boss56789 - The majority of women don't enjoy anal - about 75% of couples try it, about 35% of women will tolerate it occasionally, and about 15% that enjoy it regularly. About 50% of guys like it, the rest think it's gross. It's not for casual encounters in my opinion. But that's not what the question/take was about. A porn addict is incapable of a normal and healthy sexual relationship - they're too busy jerking off instead of being with their woman. Really dumb.
I wish a lot of people would see it the way we do, I know a lot of people agree with me here on gag as you see by the replies but some don't realize porn is bad if it's to the point someone's addicted
Porn is not bad. The type of porn typically keeps the audience away from knowing self and others.
@Ahsthen addiction = bad
@Ahsthen - You're wrong - porn is REALLY bad. You're jerking off to porn instead of forming a valid romantic man-woman sexual relationship. And that's a complete FAIL.
@Browneye57 we never discussed anything yet, but on the plus side he didn't take his phone to work today
@Browneye57 I do watch porn, but I full well understand it's a whole separate world. It's a bit similar to movies, I know it isn't real, but i still enjoy it. That said, the porn I do watch, is very 'vanilla'. The specific things you mentioned (anal, deep throating, etc) are absolutely disgusting to me. So, i simply avoid porn like that. I wonder, do you think porn is still harmful in my case? It's an honest question, I'm curious what you think about this.
@GuyWannaHelp - I think if you're replacing the intimacy of a real live woman with porn it's not healthy. I get it, guys like to see naked women, sex even more enticing. But you need an outlet for all that stimulus, and if that's jerking off instead of being involved with a woman, even your own woman, is deleterious to your well being.
ABrowneye57 In the context of this MyTake, I definitely agree. However, for me (and many others) intimacy in real life simply isn't available to us. Not at the moment at least. If it were, it would be much more appealing to me than porn.
You assume porn is viewed only by guys, alone. I read an article last year by a feminist, the title of which was, "I'm a feminist and I watch porn", and she detailed how much she found she liked female submission porn.
@Ahsthen - So, you found some lone idiot feminist that wrote a stupid article and that's what you base your opinion on? Pfft.
@Browneye57 whoa, that's not what he's saying at all.
He brings forward the fact that there are women who do actually watch porn. Here's a poll from this site: Do You Watch Porn? ↗
of course it isn't scientific, but it's clear there are women who do watch porn.
@GuyWannaHelp - Sure they do, I never once disputed that. Still doesn't make it good or right for either gender, and does not change my argument one little bit.
@Browneye57 Fair enough. I only mentioned it because you criticized @Ahsthen for "basing his opinion on one stupid article written by a idiot feminist", while he never claimed that was what he based his opinion on. He only offered it as an example.
@GuyWannaHelp : Browneye is such because he has his head far up his ass. What a goob.
@Ahsthen why cause he agrees porn is bad when you have a woman you could have ses with everyday?
Porn addicts really don't like to be told what their doing is disgusting. How many Q's do we have on here where the woman can't get her man to have sex with her cuz he's jerking off to porn instead. And it's near impossible to compete with that - it's instant gratification, no interaction required, and a steady stream of increasingly depraved acts, one after the other. No, this is truly an addiction and once started can be near impossible to break 'till their whole social structure breaks down, or their woman bails on them. Mark Gungor does a pretty good segment on this, and how to break the cycle. Try google. There is other valuable information on the deleterious affects of porn addiction and how it ruins relationships, and lives.
Can't comment about anything else but it was 3AM. He was being respectful. Also instead of accusing and nagging him:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p85xwZ_OLX0because right now, it seems you are only doing the first bit.
Actually porn doesn't fuck up your relationship with your partner.
It's actually your past, promiscuity, devious, manipulation type of behaviour,
Which forces us to dump you.
And you think you got dumped because we watch porn? Lol
It can if you lie and hide about it...
Facts.
I watch porn... honestly if it weren't for porn satisfying my needs, I would have been wasting a lot of time and effort chasing women instead of concentrating on my career and getting wealthy
Most of my friends still do, lol... I just sit back and watch them settle down for a mediocre lifestyle and then end up bitching about their partners, I laugh so hard my insides hurt
"Struggle" with pornography? Uh. What struggle? It's only a struggle if you think it's a struggle. And I don't, therefore I've never struggled, despite watching lots of porn.
People are allowed to have private desires, or public desires. As long as no one is being hurt, it's their business. If he chooses to involve you in that, so be it. You sound very, very insecure in yourself with this entire post. You don't get to decide what someone else watches; he wouldn't get to decide what you watch, would he? If you don't like it, break up with him (that would be stupid, to think porn is more important to you than your boyfriend, but hey if that's how you feel).
Gee, that was easy.
It's a struggle if someone is ADDICTED
And your an idiot for saying that about me on someone elses post consider yourself blocked, especially for being unsupportive... And until you face something you can't face one day and know wtf I'm talking about keep your negitivity away people like you tick me tf off
good riddance d/a
Problem due to addiction is way different form the problem due to porn. You are comparing watching TV with a drinking problem, those are entirely different scenarios.
Oh no! He's hiding his porn from you because you've made it clear to him that it makes you feel insecure. You forced him to lie!
For starters, the two pictures that you posted here are not pornographic. They my be a bit revealing, but certainly not pornographic. So if these mainstream pics fit into your definition of what porn actually looks like than your husband would have to think twice before bringing home the latest edition of Sports Illustrated or even the Daily News.
Personally speaking, I hate porn, but I have a collection on my computer of tens of thousands of pics of partially dressed women similar to the ones that you've posted here. If I were dating a women and she had a problem with that then I would have to break up with her.
FYI, guys are visual creatures and we like to look at sexy women. In most cases it's a harmless form of entertainment. If he still loves you, if he's not cheating on you and if he's keeping his smut away from the children, then you have nothing to complain about.
In every marriage each partner needs some degree of personal space.
Maybe you just need to let go of this issue and give your husband some space?
You need to lighten up and to back off! If not, then your insecurities will ruin your marriage...
Nah I mean fully nude. If you’ve never written a mytake then you probably don’t know gag wants you to post a picture... so I chose that instead of a nude pictures and also because it goes against gag rules... and no clearly you think it’s ok to lie and hide porn. No it’s not ok
Most of these people here are with me anyways. 😂
Agreed, people need personal space, even in a marriage, unless one or both parties want to go nuts.
Why does number of people supporting you matter more than your own husband's views and feelings?
Lol women are so sensitive about this. Looking at porn is not lying. It's looking at porn and that's it.
If he came and woke you up at 3 am you're going to have morning breath and shit.
Webcam girls don't have bad breath and he can get it over and done with quicker.
I could care less about bad breath... that's just a bloody excuse... and he could of came to me instead of looking at that stupid crap... Can't believe you would think that is actually OK... Why? Why else where instead of a wife? without making excuses by the way.
No I meant YOU would've had bad breath. Morning breath is disgusting
It can be yes... but one thing I rarely suffer. I don’t have a glass of milk before bed or anything that will give me bad breath
So again no excuse... your excusing the use of porn when someone is there for real sex
If you’re single and lonely it’s understandable, but still bad. If you have a sexual relationship of your own, there’s literally no excuse to watching porn.
Its just porn. if anything it helps the marriage. In stead of going out and cheating on you he can just watch some porn.
My wife court me watching she was more upset I was doing it on my own. She said she liked watching it it got her in the mood. ...
Porn is honestly very disgusting and a big turn off to me anyways, Its nothing but fake and disrespecting each other now, i dont get it, why do people in relationships needs to look at porn, when you have a partner? I always found porn disgusting to be honest
Thank you and I totally agree!
You're talking about professional porn. There's a lot of porn that isn't fake. As for disrespecting each other why wouldn't that be fun? lol.
@Red_Dragon clearly your immature... disrespecting someone isn’t cool
@xButterflyKisses87x No. It's not immature just because you don't understand it. You're just vanilla.
@Red_Dragon accepting porn or not doesn’t mean I’m vanilla or boring. Don’t judge by tf you don’t know..
A decent guy right here 👍🏻🙂
@MindYourEyes haha Thanks !! :P