Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
I’m here to write my take on giving head.
No, not another few paragraphs giving tips or my two cents on how to give you man oral in a way that he’ll surely enjoy. More like my opinion on the whole aspect of giving head, in general. How I feel it can (and arguably should) play positively into the dynamics of a relationship, that seems to differ from the opinion widely held by many others.
Firstly, I don’t see anything in the least bit shameful in giving head. (Likewise for going down on your partner, though I’m writing from the perspective of a straight female so I’ll stick to the former.)
1. It's gross!
One of the main arguments that I have heard from many, both online as well as from a few friends in rl, regarding why they detest giving head so much that it’s never even considered to be an option with their boyfriend, is that it’s ‘gross’. That- “come on… boys pee out of there. Do you think really think that I’m going to want to put my mouth on that kind of place?”
Well.. yes. That’s true.
Boys do urinate from there. Seeing as how you’re both out of grade-school, though, it could be assumed you’re past the stage of thinking that boys have cooties. Sexual intercourse in whole (not just oral) isn’t overly sanitary; there is some truth behind why it’s called ‘bumping uglies’. With oral sex being an extension of penetrative sex, the presence of tiny bits of not-so-desired things may be a tough pill to swallow. However, all it takes to get juvenile thoughts like that out of your mind would be a slight change of mind-set.
2. It's ever-so 'degrading'
...This seems like a good time refer back to good ole Merriam Webster to see what degradation actually means, as opposed to simply regurgitating ideas that third-wave feminists and prudists alike have shoved into our minds-
Definition of degrade
1a : to lower in grade, rank, or status : demoteb : to strip of rank or honorsc : to lower to an inferior or less effective level <degrade the image quality>d : to scale down in desirability or salability
2a : to bring to low esteem or into disrepute <his actions have degraded his profession>b : to drag down in moral or intellectual character
Sure, baby. Let me take your manhood- your pride and joy, with a side of family jewels, in my mouth. Nestle them right in between my chompers.
...That's degrading? Really now?!
I’ve never looked at giving head to my boyfriend as degrading.
Yes, the woman is usually on her knees, which may be looked at as submissive. As putting the guy in a ‘position of power’.
However, let’s not forget that while I’m giving him head, I’ve got his dick and/or family jewels in my mouth. It may be time to reconsider who’s really in power here, if you insist on looking at intimate acts such as this as a power struggle in the first place.
To me, giving a guy oral is a bit of an act of trust. That he’s willing to put his manhood in such a vulnerable position and not be worried that he’ll leave the room castrated or any less of a ‘man’ (literally).
There’s just so much going on that it can be almost overwhelming. The musky scent, the taste of skin, the texture differences between shaft and head, the noises they make (especially the whimpering and pleading), the absolute control you have over them- the list goes on. In addition to how few things rub your ego quite like having someone stop you because they can’t speak, other than to tell you that you’re the best they’ve ever had.
3. A great way for a bit of a role-reversal
If anything, giving head to a guy is a bit of a power play. Not a power play as in femme/dom territory, or anything taboo like that. I actually have a bit of fun with working some teasing into it. There’s no more enjoyable power-trip, in my eyes, than getting your guy to be actively begging for more. For you to put his entire dick in your mouth versus just licking the shaft, or pleading to go inside of you.
'Power' and submission aside, though, it does bring me genuine (emotional as well as physical) pleasure to be able to do something for my boyfriend that he undoubtedly enjoys to the fullest. Occasionally, we’ll have a session that’s completely lust-driven, where the one thing on our minds is getting to the finish relatively quickly.
Other times, though, I like to slow things down while I’m giving him head. Maybe a bit of teasing, but mostly just taking time to prolong the pleasure he’ll receive. Enough time so that letting my hand taking over for a bit so that I can just watch him and his reactions, from facial expressions to his body/dick tensing up, or balls starting to twitch a bit if he’s particularly close, is not an issue at all.
Take note of how (in what has essentially turned into a bit of a love letter to my boyfriend’s dick) I didn’t mention how I enjoy giving head because it’s a ‘selfless act’.
Sure, it’s something that I can do for him without requiring much in return at the time. Sure, it’s something throughout which he can relax and focus solely on enjoying versus working toward ensuring that I get too much back.
However, let it be known that for myself, at least, it’s a pretty sexually-rewarding act as well. The whole ‘feels’ aspect extends to the physical (as in getting me dripping wet) just about every time.
You want to shame me (in addition to many other girls, I'm sure) for enjoying, getting turned on and even physically amped up for sex afterwards, in cases where the blowjob doesn’t continue to a finish but are more of a warm-up for the main event?
Step right up.
What Girls & Guys Said
30 40Totally agree with you. Good for you for being forthright as usual!
Another awesome myTake! I love your attitude toward this topic and how you turn the arguments against giving oral on their head.
I love giving and both receiving but SERIOUSLY not everyone has to like it. Some people do like it, some don't, some haven't tried it yet etc.
This topic should be closed for a while. It's not like people don't do oral.
... of course. I never said anyone HAS to like/dislike it. Everyone can feel as they wish about it, though I'm equally free to voice my own stance.
I personally won't accept oral because that puts me in a very vulnerable position. You said it perfectly on number 2. I don't trust most people.
A small mouth won't last long with blowies. So I am personally not into it much.
Fun fact. Just the sight of a small mouth around a dick is orgasmic in its own right.
@Jericho45 it is for you. I guess you sucked plenty of thick dicks.
If someone thinks giving oral is gross, they should read a little about kissing. lol. That's not exactly sanitary.
And you're one million percent right about the power angle. You have a *tremendous* amount of power while giving a BJ - I feel like that aspect would be tremendous fun, teasing, making him want more, beg.
And there's *nothing* sexier than a girl who gets that and takes advantage - even abuses - that knowledge.
When she is giving head she is the dominant not the submissive!..
One BITE and the guy will fall from heaven to HELL.
Include this point to
I would eat my ex-gf head often and do it well but she rarely even *attempted* to give me head. When she did, no matter how much I tried to help her, it would be full of teeth, short, unpleasurable, and she thought she was a hoe for doing it. Made the relationship certainly not feel as connected after a while.
That sounds terrible, both should make an effort to please eachother. Plus sucking a knob isn't very difficult, it always confuses me how some people struggle with it so much.
awe! Sorry it didn't work out for you two because of that, though it is a pretty valid reason to call things off. (Also gong to leave my two cents about how I can kind of relate? Mostly in how when I first got together with my boyfriend, I had zero clue as to how to give head. Other than the obvious putting it in my mouth. I ended up just straight up asking him to guide me on what he likes/doesn't like, or would like more of, after every session. I found it to have a sort of learning curve of it's own with both parties putting in some effort so maybe you could (playfully) suggest that should the same issue arise in the future. :) )
haha, why would someone have sex if they think it's gross/degrading? I also thought having sex is like being submissive. And now I enjoy being like that. But if someone can avoid having sex by those thoughts it would be better for them. So just let them be what they are.
By the way, I didn't know before girls find logic to stay away from sex. LOL xD
... yes, of course. If someone doesn't like sex/oral, they're free to refrain from engaging in it. I'm not forcing them to do otherwise, though I am just as free to voice my opinion on my own personal stance.
I'll not advise against doing it if you like it. But I won't demand it.
Of course , it's better if your boyfriend gets the exclusivity. Girls offering BJs like sweets live a risky life: BJs can pass a lot of STDs , just like vaginal or anal.
Congrats. You're a straight female. Stop the presses!
even other primates have oral sex
This is absolutely true!
I don't like the thought of a girl putting my penis in her mouth. That's just barbaric and disgusting!
I'm sorry! But, i fucking LOVE LOVE LOOOOOVE going down on my fiancé!!!
I defined do not find the action to be degrading.
Also, spitting is rude! A little bit of salty vitamin C, calcium, chlorine, citric acid, fructose, lactic acid, magnesium, nitrogen, phosphorus, potassium, sodium, vitamin B12, and zinc hasn't hurt anyone. It's like taking a vitamin in liquid form. Swallow ladies. Spitting is fucking rude!
A girl told me once: "A lady never spits!"
@TadCurious aye. spitters are quitters. 🙈
No.
Enough said.
I'll only give head if he eats my pussy. 😛
If a guy can do that right, he can pretty much do whatever he wants with her after that ;)
@red324 ;) hell yeah
#FairTrade
@Prof_Don you know it ;)
I don't know how it is for you women, but when I perform a blow job, there's a whole different feeling than when I am going down on a girl. There's a sympathetic feeling when giving head to another man. When I feel his shaft sliding into my mouth, I know the feeling he is enjoying. When he bottoms out in my mouth, I know the pleasure of being surrounded. When I play with his balls, I can relate to that sensation. It's almost like I myself am feeling what I am performing on him.
I'm just sick of seeing this in the suggestion que.
... nothing's stopping you from unfollowing 'sexual behaviour' as a topic. :)
Not that I'm attacking your take, which is fine, but it's just that gag should implement a thing where if I visit a post, it should no longer be in my feed. I want to see other stuff in the feed as well.
@ThisDudeHere so you're not following topics like sexual behaviour or sexual health and you still get sexually based ones in your feed? You are already able to block topics so feel free to block whichever topic you no longer wish to receive posts about in your feed.
I still get this in my suggestion no matter what I do. Sexual behavior has never been followed by me.
then block it
As a doctor of science I can safely say that you don't know what you're talking about.
oh? I don't know what I'm talking about yet, aren't you the one unable to figure out how to get rid of sex-based questions in your newsfeed, doc?
orig15.deviantart.net/.../..._b_real_x-d8yi7q3.gif
You don't know what you're talking about because it doesn't work. You've obviously never tried it before.
... the more you say, the more vague and nonsensical your 'arguments' become.
https://m.popkey.co/20ccff/kWjoK.gif
I do follow said topics but I am talking about your take in particular. I already opened it before and yet it is still in my feed.
@ThisDudeHere I'm not even going to ask why you bothered opening a take that, from the title alone, made it clear as day that it was sexual in nature, then complained that sexual things are in your newsfeed? Again, let me repeat- block/unfollow those topics if you're just gonna complain everything that you're signed up to get.
And let me repeat again. I'm following the topic because I am interested in it. All I'm saying is that your take in particular did not and does not interest me after viewing it once and thus I want it off my feed to see other takes of this topic. What is there to not understand?
@ThisDudeHere see that x at the top right corner of your computer screen? Press it and never return to this take in particular again. :)
Nice way of avoiding my question with passive aggression.
@ThisDudeHere passive aggression? I let you know how you could no longer see this take. Exit out of it. Stop being a drama queen.
You're the drama queen here. Insofar I've only made objective statements.
I opened the take because that makes it go away out of all the suggestions. Answering a myTake or question makes it go away forever.
nope. The only way to 'make a myTake go away forever' is to do as I suggested, versus coming back to it constantly due to your desire to incessantly whine.
Neither of us whined. We only stated objective opinions that you took as personal attacks against you.
you clearly don't understand how this website works at all. It's pointless talking to you.
stop talking.
Never been into receiving BJ's & fully put off by crap attempts by ex's , but when I used to be sexually active ( my situation prevents this now ) was always happy to go down on my girl , ever since my teens.