Boyfriend looks at really disturbing porn... is this normal?

[Anonymous]

Alright, I know this is wrong of me to do but the other day while my boyfriend was in the shower I decided to do a little exploring on his computer... I looked at his history and on it was like TONS of just all these websites that said, "DISTURBING PORN" "THE MOST DISTURBING PORN WEBSITE EVER" and there were all these other really weird websites like, "guys sticks whole fist in vagina video." I can't remember the specific names but they were really really strange. also what's weird is he doesn't have speakers. I'm thinking that maybe he watches them with his friends because they're funny websites...? I don't know... I was very shocked. I don't mind him watching porn but THIS? I don't really know what to think. I would never expect this because my boyfriend is like the most down to earth guy ever. I expected him to watch porn but not porn like this. so would you call this an average thing for a guy to be interested in watching?

[TinyCyborg]

Because the entire planet has become desensitized. read the comments in here: "its funny!" "I like to gross out my friends!" "i'm curious!" like the people on the screen aren't real breathing humans. These commentator are the equivalent of people who secretly want to smell farts "hey does this smell bad, smell this" sort of people, obviously they are weak and for the most part stupid, while this is probably the case with your boyfriend, its more likely a case of needing more and more extreme p*rn to get off ( there are several other commentators who fall into this category). We're living in an age where it's not about sex anymore, if it was the p*rn would have remained blowjobs and intercourse, it's about power and in most cases the objectification of women: a woman in a position that seems almost surreal (ie a fist inside her) might as well be a puppet. She is a toy. She feels no pain and only wants more (or so it seems. of course the reality of it is that the scene is shot over several hours/days and there are at least 7+ people on the other side of the camera) Unfortunately, little miss wishes-her-acting-career-took-off gets a few grand and gets to waddle home to recover while real women have to now preform like her and pretend to actually like it. He is going to have to chose. To either try to turn back and regain his imagination and cool it with the extreme misogyny or he will chose to pretend to stop looking and just become more sneaky.

[timberlake]

i think he's just curious about the weird stuff. porn opens doors to the most outrageous fetishes and fantasies out there. half of the vids are like car crashes - you want to look away, but you just can't because you're so curious about it. the weirdest and most disgusting things always makes us wonder. I mean, lots of people started watching porn in the first place because they never had sex before and were curious about it. it's just a way to "see it all". it doesn't mean he's actually going to do anything that he watches.

like straight women who watch lesbian porn or something along those lines. the only time I would be concerned is if he's watching stuff that's illegal like child porn or something. I'd get him arrested then because that's when something in the brain is off. children shouldn't be viewed in a sexual manner by adults. that's what I would call DISTURBING.

also, he may be watching stuff he always wanted to try, but is too scared to ask you to do. if you can find something he looked at often that's not too weird for you, maybe you can try it out and surprise him?

[Asker]

This was a very helpful comment. Thank you :)

[timberlake]

You're very welcome!

[heatherlu]

I wouldn't describe fisting as 'disturbing'.

The thing is - whatever kind of porn he is watching; it's probably more out of curiosity than actually wanting to realise it in his own life.

It doesn't mean that this is the kind of thing that turns him on - I know a lot of people who watch porn just to widen their sexual awareness and see what other things there are out there to do - besides the normal - even when they don't replicate them in their own sexual experiences.

[lolfreddy]

From a guys perspective I will tell you why he watches these.

Because they are insane, crazy, hilarous and it makes us laugh and go "ewww!"

haha seriously, when me and my friends watch stuff like that it just amazes us and we just freak out! So no worries! he probably watches it with his friends or maybe because its weird.

Honestly most guys watch porn like that because its so strange. One word of advice though love, don't snoop around on his computer like that. It's not good. you need to learn to trust him because I'm sure he trusts you. for all you know his friend probably went on it and not him, or maybe his friend pulled it up and was like "Dude check this sh!t outtt!" it happens all the time.

But yeah, trust him, and stay away from his history. Please.

Guys get hella pissed when girls invade their privacy without asking.

[TexPlayboy]

Porn is a progressive habit. What excites you today is not enough to excite you tomorrow. My guess, he is normal and the shocking porn is entertaining, but not something he will ever "sign up" for. Tell him you want to watch it with him, and see how he reacts to it. I bet he is as shocked as you are, but maybe not as offended.

Good Luck

James

[regular-guy]

It is wrong and will likely lead to future relationship problems. He is probably addicted.

[regular-guy]

That is not a normal thing to do. I am not saying guys aren't curious, but that doesn't make it okay.

[Asker]

Are you against porn?

[regular-guy]

Absolutely....the research is clear

[Asker]

ALL porn?

[tex151]

Woman why are you snooping through your bfs stuff, you found his porn site big deal shame on him for not deleting the history so I guess that was his fault. But still he was probably thinking my sweet, kind and loving girlfriend would never snoop though my stuff, but then again he did the fatal mistake of actually trusting a woman, once again that is his fault not yours. So in the future don't snoop though his stuff.

[l-hedoniste]

If you're shocked by fisting, wait till you see what they do with champagne bottles.

[dead-mellotron]

it's probably just for laughs. like, no one really gets off to 2girls1cup, but everyone's seen it.

[Vassar]

its prob just a joke, guys send pics of them to each others cell phones to gross them out.

[cranberygrl]

"Disturbing porn" sounds scary, but fisting porn really doesn't.

I mean if it was stuff like "Guy rapes girl with firehose" disturbing, I'd be worried. But fisting is not that big of a deal... imo

[Appleater]

Just because someone watches porn doesn't mean they're some freak. Girls and guys both watch porn and I've seen some gross stuff somebody has texted me. Or I mean somebody found a gross video and everybody laughs about it. Two girls One Cup took that a little too far though haha.

[VAGitarian]

I dunno.. seems weird to me?

[crazycool]

Not to average but yet not to strange but funny as hell

[Killy]

"guys sticks whole fist in vagina video."

Thats it? He probably watched it out of curiousity. I mean c'mon I didn't beleive it until I saw it xD.

[smith2267]

Don't worry, it doesn't mean he wants to stick his fist in your vag. Just because guys watch things doesn't mean they ant to do them.

[smith2267]

so what is he watching besides fisting (that is what sticking a fist in a vagina is called, btw).

Fisting isn't all that disturbing, compared to some of what is out there.

[Asker]

I really really wish I could remember. I'm gonna do some more investigating (oh god I'm horrible... I'm just sooo curious!)

[smith2267]

Don't spy!! that is a relationship killer.

[Asker]

Well I'm not exactly spying... because to tell you the truth I don't really care if he does look at this kind of porn. all I really want to know is if it's normal.

[smith2267]

Yeah, alost all porn is normal for a guy to look at. Exceptions would be beastiality, rape, or S&M. Some guys look at those, but it isn't normal.

[Botosaui617]

hahaah its funny!

[Asker]

Are you saying it's funny because it's weird or because that kind of porn is funny?

[smith2267]

I think he meant it's funny because it got your boyfriend in trouble with you.

[Botosaui617]

Dat porn is a little funny but more amazing a FIST? cmon that frekin incredible. but that's something id show people, my boys or hey my gurl why not. we can make it a inside joke. but I wouldn't jus sitt in my room alone and watch it. you both were right wen it comes to why I think its funny

[lily85462155]

oh my god! I looked at my boyfriends computer..and he had stuff like that too O_O

[DemsBones]

yeah, I watch some pretty freaky stuff, its all just weird curiosity. I find it easier to masturbate to really hardcore porn

[Anonymous]

Guys are curious. Seeing a fist in a vagina is intriguing to say the least. This is what happens when you combine curiosity with being horny, lol.

If I saw a prostitute on the street I would want to look, but just out of curiosity. There would be no real sexual agenda there.

I hope this isn't too confusing. The main message is that there is a very big difference between finding something to be interesting our of curiosity, and wanting to do something for real.

[Anonymous]

just fisting is really not that disturbing...i look at weird stuff all the time, just to see what the hell people are doing. I'm not turned on by it at all, I just think it's funny

[Anonymous]

Ah yes remember when you would get so mad at your mom for going through your things & finding something "disturbing" to her? Well why are you going through his "things?"

[Anonymous]

its just funny porn