How to identify a "roast beef vagina" before it's too late?

Question

We’ve all been there. You've managed to woo a girl by way of traditional date or maybe night time escalation. You get home, the mood is right, the drinks have been flowing and you have convinced her that in fact, yes… sex is a great idea. That magic moment comes when you start undressing her, she is on your bed and lifts her perfectly shaped bottom 6 inches off the duvet cover so you can slide her underwear off. And then you see it…

The dreaded roast beef. The meat curtains. The sleeve of wizard. Call it what you will, but for most that is quite the turn off and the last thing a man like yourself wants to see flapping in the wind before engaging in the feel-good coitus that could have been. So how does one avoid such a surprise?

How to identify a "roast beef vagina" before it's too late?

SvetlanaSavachenko · Accepted Answer

I've had literally thousands of guys use my beef curtain vagina (yes I'm a Whore) in my life and not a single one has ever complained about them. Not one! I've had many say my beef curtains are very sexy and they love them. I'm also bisexual and love pussy as much as I do dick and I am very turned on by beef curtains!

I'm also thinking the asker based upon his age is a virgin and his user name would imply he's a crossdresser from Conneticut and most likely wishes he had beef curtains of his own.

RJGraveyTrain · Accepted Answer

By not having sex ever. Lol.

Seriously, I don't get the big deal. It doesn't really interfere with the sex, that's like getting upset because a dude has foreskin. But hey we have preferences.

Maybe try getting pics before going all the way?

This_is_my_username · Accepted Answer

That's pretty shallow. I don't think most men care about it. That's like saying "oh wow your dick reminds me of a hot dog!" It's gross Jesus

NyomiMcClinton · Accepted Answer

omg I have seen watching porn videos that some females vaginas look horrible. geesh. I thought all vaginas look alike, I was wrong.

joemm · Accepted Answer

Keep in mind that your penis is far from perfect too. Most guys have rough or coarse skin and also odors down there. This is why I use a penis health creme every morning. These are made to help guys keep their penises clean, smooth and moisturized and work very well. Simply apply it to the skin and you are all set. Cheers.

genericname85 · Accepted Answer

i mean you can just ask that. i do it all the time, even before we come even close to having sex any time soon xD if she´s not open for sexual topics at all, i´ll just ditch her, cause i want to date adults not children.

super147 · Answer

This is what happens when a guy has only ever seen vaginas in porn. They assume that every girl has little to no labia. This doesn't take into account the amount of pornstars who have gone through labiaplasty to make their vaginas look like an adolescent girl's vagina. If you can't cope with labia then you're probably better off avoiding the whole sex thing.

Sara413 · Answer

I have beef curtains and I've literally never had a guy be grossed out or turned off by them...

Pac-Man · Answer

"You stupid dog"

MrMysteryMan · Answer

Why would you want to avoid that kind of vagina? That's like 70% of them out there. My face would be buried in that shit! So yummy and meaty. Wrapped around your face and cock. Mmmmmm you definitely don't know what you're missing brah.

TadCurious · Answer

Girls, most guys don't think like this. This guy is an idiot who gets a kick out of putting down women's bodies due to his own insecurities.

BillieJean1070 · Answer

Why would you want to avoid it? Are you getting plenty elsewhere?

meatballs21 · Answer

You haven't actually seen a vagina in real life, have you? You've just read a bunch of double entendres for them because you're incorrectly using them here.

Meat/beef curtains refer to all labia of all sizes. Not just larger ones.

The Wizard's Sleeve refers to a woman whose vagina is loose or spacious on the INSIDE, in the same way that Merl here has way more cloth for his arms than his arms need:

blog.eyewire.org/.../MerlinDisney.gif

Unless bats fly out of her vag or an unholy stench is released when the panties come off, I guarantee you won't be stopping just because she has meatier flaps.

frozenhorizon · Answer

Am I the only one that took this as sarcasm?

Other_Tommy_Wiseau · Answer

This site is fucking gross

thatgurlyouhurt · Answer

wtf all girls have a vagina that looks like that

hannahbanana11 · Answer

This post is shallow but it's preference ig. But how would you feel if a girl got into bed with you and was like "It's so small!" out loud when you whipped it out? Anyway, this just seems so disrespectful. And literally, you're going to be inside her! What does it matter what it is on the outside if it feels good on the inside?

Vostock · Answer

Dude. Seriously? It all feels good once you enter. Big, small, medium, xl, it really doesn't matter what the lips look like. Not all men look like a pornstar or have had such a surgery. What if they judged you by how weird your organ looks?