You set up conflicts in my mind...I don't really approve...on the other hand you are a friend plus I am a truthful person...I would have dated...and probably married a "fixed" female when I was your age. By the time I got married (age 38) I was interested in children but my wife had had her tubes tied during her first marriage..and she had had them chopped and burnt..so was a question as to whether they were even long enough if they were indeed reattachable../:/:/:
So we ended up doing in vitro which cost about $10,000 and...idk...maybe a dozen 200-mile roundtrips and 4 overnights..I gave her lots of shots with a pigsticker (1 1/2" needle) in the rear of progesterone. The result was an autistic boy...now back to your question...yes, I dated her with tied tubes...but...before I married her I made her promise that she would try for children if I wanted them...she agreed...5 years later life was pretty good but work was stressful and I kind of let it slide...but one day out of the clear, wild, blue yonder..she says "I want a cat, I want a new house, I want a baby" ..I was totally flabbergasted and stared at her for a minute and then I said "OK you can have all of those things..but NOT ALL AT ONCE! What do you want first?" Well we still live in the same house, have had a cat & a ferret (sort of) and we have Andrew who you met on Skype...eh...Sabby honey...no matter what you think you are certain of today...will not be the same in 15 years...believe me or believe me not...<3<3<3=D
taster you know I love you and respect your opinion but after today definitely I KNOW I do not want kids. a lot of women don't change their minds and some do. there are a lot of other things that can go on but id rather not have a child
I don't even know why you'd want to get your tubes tied if you might regret it one day..
I suppose that tells you my answer: I suppose it might be a turn off for me, seeing as any girl I date, I date with the intention of POTENTIALLY marrying her one day. I don't go into relationships just "to have fun" and add her to my list of exes. Granted right now I don't know if I ever want kids, perhaps in the future I'd feel differently.
If you're into casual sex then I'm sure no one will care, if you want to get into something serious.. It might become an issue.
look not every woman wants kids. my aunt never wanted kids and is 56 and childless. never changed her mind. everyone is different in that regard.
I understand and respect that, but I'm all about keeping your options open. It just seems really.. definitive.
wel I do want something permanent
I'm just surprised that you found a dr who will even do it o_o. Where I live a dr will not do that until your at least 35 just because so many women do change their minds. I knew a girl who never wanted to be a mother ever... she has 2 and now she could never imagine her life without them. I know it isn't the answer you want but this is coming from someone you generally cares for people and would hate for you to do this and then regret it in 5-10 yrs. What happens if that someone special does come along and you suddenly want a child? Unless you can see the future I would yet a couple more years.
here in my state its 21 years old. it actually depends on the doctor. my aunt is 56 never wanted kids and doesn't have them. it does depend on the woman. I guess no one can know what I feel or what I mean unless you're me but I'm 100% positive I don't want them
I'd say hold off until you're a bit older.
I used to feel the same way, I was sure I NEVER wanted children, I hated them and couldn't imagine myself with one of my own in any circumstance.
But now, I want at least 4 children.
People change, A LOT, and that's pretty permanent, so be careful.
lol not waiting. trust me I KNOW I do not want them. good luck with you tho
I had my tubes tied at 23, but I have 2 children, ever since my boyfriend and I broke up, I have found dating to be difficult, if a guy says oh I want kids of my own someday, I have to walk away. I'm sure you can find a guy who doesn't want kids as well.
wow so did the procedure fail? I'm sorry to hear that :( good luck tho in the future
No. I had it done when my 2nd child was 6 weeks old. Didn't fail.
oh OK. well there are many men out there who don't want kids. I'm sure you will find a guy
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!It means you have made up your mind and are absolutely sure of not having your own children. I'd would respect your decision and would date/bang you. But not at your age. I think you should reconsider.
look. not every woman wants or needs kids. its not a must for me nor am I the motherly type. some women might regret but I will not. I would rather be in a relationship and if anything goes south I'm single and free. no strings attached
At this point in my life, that could very well be a deal breaker unless we're absolutely perfect for each other in every way. Especially if it's just for prevention. I could look past it more easily if it was related to some health condition or something.
In a few years, I might be more okay with it. It really depends on a lot of factors.
thanks for answering :)
I'm also curious, would your ovaries and eggs remain in tact for potential future harvesting and in vitro fertilization? That could sway me if the option remained in some way or another.
well in virto is always an option and so is reversal but for the cost of invitro its not worth it. $12,000-18,000 and insurance does not cover it! the only thing that they do when tying tubes is damage, cut, burn,etc the tubes. everything else is left intact. a hysterectomy is when those parts get removed. also the reversal isn't guranteed.
No, I would't be dating a girl with her tubes tied. I would be using her a lot as a Fuk body, but nothing more. I think you will regret that very much in couple years not even a decade. No fence but you fuking your self up deliberately
because I don't want kids I'm f***ing myself up?
You taking away MUCH more than kids away, you taking away something much greater and dangerous from your self as a girl. If you already know what I'm talking about, in that case I'w got nothing to say, but only enjoy. If no, well in that case good luck!
actually I have no idea what you mean. if you can explain. just because I am a girl doesn't mean I want or need kids. not every girl wants that that's all I'm saying.
Date? Sure, why not? But, for a long term relationship? For me, maybe when I'm older and have already had kids of my own.
thanks for answering :)
Can't you get them "untied" later if you change your mind about kids?
well the point of getting them tied is to not get them untied lol. if I wanted something less permanent id stay on birth control. and yes you can get them untied but its not guaranteed plus its costly
The medical community has gotten better at "untying" plus there is always in vitro...but..knowing what I know now...would opt for more conventional birth control...can read my answer if you like..
That's true. There are a lot of other and less pernament options (but only less pernament in the way that they are easier to reverse). Like you could get that implant that lasts for three years or whatever and if you still don't want kids in 3 years you could just get it again.
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