Your partner ignores the safeword! What do you do??

[ImaginaryReality]

OK, so let's say you and your S.O. are having sex -- the type of sex that necessitates a safe word. Things are getting uncomfortable for you, and you have to say the safe word. He/she seemingly doesn't hear it, or ignores it. You say it again and again and again, but still no response. At some point, would you stop the sex and discuss the situation? Or wait till it's over? And, in any case, what would you generally do? For the record, this is a hypothetical question. It's NOT related to anything I've experienced. I've never even had a girlfriend, lol.

[heatherlu]

I'm imagining that a safe word needs to be used because you're in a situation where you can't just stop sex. I mean if you could - you probably would in the first place rather than using the safe word. Safe words are for when you're taken out of your comfort zone, and most likely, out of control - thus you have no or limited power to stop the sex.

Hence, safe word.

SO definitely yes, there would be a long discussion afterward. There's a breaking of trust there; and something that needs to be talked about. I mean, in some cases depending on what's going on it could be very serious. You've definitively asked someone to stop - in a way which is known to both of you - but I'm imagining in that situation in a way that other people would understand too. I'm thinking if you're in a situation to use a safe word, you're probably going to be saying 'no, stop' in a very heartfelt way too.

My point being - the trust is there, imparted on one person. And is broken. The other person definitely doesn't want to continue, certifiably so - as they've used a word agreed upon between them which over-rules everything. And the other person's either ignored it - or mis-used that trust by taking control over you, but not maintaining their control over themselves - and thus not heard it.

Both in my opinion, sackable offenses.

[1000111001]

You deal with it and learn to love the pain. Just kidding, that's rape. you can't trust them.

[queefy]

I'd just go ahead and poop on his weiner. He'd feel me then.

[MrOracle]

LMFAO!

[MrOracle]

The difference between consentual non-consent and RAPE is TRUST. And having a safeword is a big part of that trust. The submissive person TRUSTS you enough to submit to you because they trust that you won't push things too far, and that if you start to, that you will instantly respond to their safe word. If you fail to do that, knowingly, then IMO, you are committing rape/sexual assault.

Trust is EVERYTHING in a power-play relationship. And there definitely ARE people that shouldn't be trusted who are in that world. IMO, someone who would do as you describe, and knowingly ignore REPEATED uses of the safeword should be broken up with and never seen again, at LEAST. Depending on the circumstances, formal charges might be warranted.

[Anonymous]

There isn't much you can do at the time. The only reason you'd need a safeword is if you had no other control. So she's going to do whatever she wants and you're going to have to tolerate it.

But afterward is another story You pretty much have no choice but to ditch her and never see her again. Unless for some reason you like to be raped.

[wpmason]

I dunno... Relax, try not to clench I guess.

Or play dead.

[TheRealAttila]

FLUGG??NKd€CHIŒß?L?ÊN

[TheRealAttila]

gag can't even handle the safeword

[wpmason]

Nice...solid reference.

[Anonymous]

I would never have sex with them again because the only reason I would need a safe word is if I was tied up and taking advantage of somebody tied up is rape.

[Anonymous]

that's too bad, one time I set the safe word as "squirrel" and she wouldn't stop! I kept saying squirrel squirrel squirrel! Then I thought maybe I had it wrong and we had agreed on chipmunk and I forgot, so I started saying chipmunk, chipmunk! Chipmunk!

Never saw her again, and now I hate squirrel AND chipmunks