Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health Can a 'Friends With Benefits' relationship ever turn into a serious relationship?
Anonymous
I have this friend, who is a ‘friend with benefits’. Honestly, I am not a slut by any means and this is the only person I’m currently sleeping with. But like I said he is completely a FWB. I have no problem with it, in fact I like our little relationship. It’s very private and it’s like there is not much emotion with it. Yeah, I know what his intentions are with me. But I mean, me and him get along great! I really enjoy being with him. The only problem was when I saw him at the bar… is was kind of weird? I wouldn’t mind actually dating him though! I don’t know if we will ever start dating but I was kind of wondering if FWB relationships ever turn into anything serious.
Updates:
+1 y
Okay maybe I should give a little bit more detail about our situation. We’ve been messing around for 9 months now. He and I have known each other for most of our lives. Both of our families know each other. I have fun with him, and he is very nice!
+1 y
Wow! I have gotten so many replies! Here is the little update… We haven’t spoken in almost 2 months because I found out he had another girlfriend the entire time! Isn’t that something? That explains everything. I took off all communication. Thanks guys!
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What Girls & Guys Said
29 15Yep.
But if it's been going on for 9 months... probably not. That's how my girlfriend and I started out, and my best friend and her boyfriend. Worked out pretty well.
it can't turn into a real relationship... sorry :(
I believe FWB's can become serious. The question is: Will it last?
Yes it could if you guys really click together and talked about it.
Personally I don't like the whole idea of FWB because I think a person should be with someone who would be willing to commit to you but that's just me.
we did it ALOT and after we would end up talking and then BAM gf
Just go with the flow as long as you are happy.But what do you really mean by FWB.
I've been in the same situation. I ended up getting hurt. I loved it and felt the same way as you did. But if a guy isn't willing to make a commitment, he;s just not that into you.
Maybe the guy is into ui but he's scared of a commitment or maybe he's not ready 4 a relationship yet
He's not interested.
If he wanted to be in a relationship with u, and ur already doing stuff, he would already have asked you out.
If you want a real bf, look for another guy. If you are fine with just being friends with benefits, and don't wnt a bf, great. look no further.
i wouldn't know anything bout if they turn into anything serious ... but if hez ure friends with benefits then he has ta like you at leazt a little or a lot ta even be ya friends with benefits ... that meanz you hav a chance iz like a 50-50 ting he may wanna b more but tha onlii waii ta noe fa sure iz by askin or he may not but eitha way you hav ta ask ta noe ... considerin you sed 9 mthz I tink that may b he juz doeznt wanna let you go because hez scared he'll lose you 4eva or u'll find someone betta ... juz follow ya heart if you feel like waiting round longer ta c what will happen if tingz can go sumwhere then do it ... if you feel like itz a waste of ure time and you can't pretend ta b anyting lezz than frendz then do that but eitha waii do what makez you happy in tha end
"i'm not a slut? sure/
y would you get upset that he had a gf... if ur friends who mess around ur basicly in an open relationship...ur not going out ur "going in and out and in again" lol unless he ever told you it was exclusive...
Who said I was ever upset? I just dropped all commnication because I don't want to deal with it.
yes a FWB situation can become more I have seen it happen. but you might want to talk about it before you do because if your families are friends with each other it will be a very uncomfortable break up. be careful.
It's not gonna work to well because the boundary of only FWB has been set, meaning that he knows he can have you but doesn't really want to. it sux but it's true if anything you might be able to get him as a b.f for the time that he doen't have a girlfriend, but if he finds someone else you'll end up breaking up and remaining FWBs. hopefully you don't want a cycle of breakups though. FWB's are never good things to have in my opinion. I don't think it's possible to have unemotional sex unless you grew up very detached from ppl.
any kind of relationship can turn into a serious one.
i had a FWB for about 6 months when we started actually going out in june.
then again, I was so unprepared for that.. and you seem to be in this relationship with some kind of hope that it'll be more, I'd talk to him about HIS feelings because it seems like you want a relationship and this could potentially hurt you if he doesn't feel the same. just a thought from someone who's been there.
My friend had an FWB (no sex tho). And even though they both talked about wanting to makeout with other people, they never did. And they were both contemplating having sex just for the heck of it (they were both virgins). They've been official for...well over a year now. It's not impossible, just rare. They're amazing together. I think it worked out for them because neither of them had ever been in a serious relationship. And it was obvious to everyone around them that they deeply cared for each other. Knowing all this tho, I still have my doubts. You get used to having no strings attached, especially guys. My friend got lucky.
That only worked bcos they didn't have sex. sex changes things. if you have an actual f*** buddy then a proper relationship is never gona happen!
They did have sex tho, way before they got together. That's why I think it's rare. I mean if you wanna say it's because they were each other's first I might give you that. But she really didn't care about him in the beginning. But yeah sex definitely makes things crazier.
guys are ASSHOLES.( most of em) I was in the same position but I decided to drop him like a bad habit...i wanted to lose my virginity to someone I didn't care for..weird I know..but I didn't wanna regret losing it to someone I actually had feelings for..cause I know for a fact that I would have regretted it..of course he asked me for my number..and I gave it to him..to be honest it was only meant to be a hit and run on my part...but then we went on dates..and I was like hey he's a nice guy..so I tested him..i lead him on..then I refused sex..and he texted me a couple times since then but I've been ignoring him..i don't think you should keep messing around with this guy..someone is bound to get hurt..ask him..where is this going? and see what he says...Good luck :)
I had an FWB relationship for six months. I took her virginity and we eventually ended up dating for 2 years. It ended up with me getting my heart completely broken and I am completely depressed having lost her. It's been 4 months and she is all I can think of still to this day. I don't advise FWB's because as many have said here- it always ends with someone being hurt.
The fact that you got hurt had nothing to do with how your relationship started.... but how it ended.....just FYI ..... plus its natural to be left... spinning.... when a relationship ends, but it happens. we all have to deal with it at some point or another. I'm not belittling your pain btw, I know what it feels like.... I've spent a whole year in a complete depression because me and my ex decided to break up.
Wow thanks for the information genius. No sh*t it had nothing to do with how it started. I just was simply stating that my relationship started as FWB and turned into something serious. You seem to be belitting my pain and I don't appreciate it at all. I am sorry you're also in a state of depression over an ex, but no need to cut me down in the process. I am in the same boat.
yes but its extermely unlikely
If you want to know if it can turn into a serious relationship, than yes there are feelings there. You do have emotions and what happened at the bar proves it. Its natural for this to happen to you though, many girls end up falling for there FWB. Its happened to me before. The best thing you can do is not push anything onto him. Do not ask what you are, or where you see this going. Instead, mention things to do together and see how he reacts ( go out to eat ALONE, doing couple type things, SLOWLY). If he spends time with you without sex always being involved , then I can see you having a good chance turning this into an actaul relaitonship. Just keep your heart guarded, and don't get your hopes up.