I think my boyfriend is inexperienced in bed?

[Anonymous]

Hey all so I'm in a new relationship with his guy. We didn't exactly talk about "oh I'm your girlfriend you're my boyfriend kind of thing", but he started calling me his baby girl and whenever we're out at a concert and a random guy talks to me I tell them I have boyfriend and whatever. We've been consistently seeing eachother and he hasn't made me second guess if he's into me or not. He's a great guy, not too obnoxious not too shy, smart and funny. He's even introduced me to his siblings and guy friends. Anyways it has gotten to a point in our relationship where we've wanted to have sex and all but have been unsuccessful for a while. Either I was on my period or he couldn't stay hard wearing a condom. We've decided that I start birth control and worked from there. But even though I've been taking it, he's not being as manly and aggressive as I'd like him to be. It does take effort to get him hard and he goes soft quickly if we don't move from oral to sex fast enough. All we've done so far is 1-2 positions and he likes staying in the one. Even if I tell him harder/faster he doesn't really do anything much. I'm not sure if he's nervous about something or just not very experienced in bed. I feel like I have to initiate a lot. He's an average size down there and he's super cuddly type and has big arms so I want him to man handle me more. I have hinted I want to be pounded and worried about being sexually frustrated and don't want to make him feel bad as I do enjoy it but I feel like we need to work on it. Any thoughts/advice?

[NJ_Casanova]

Yes, Sounds like he's inexperienced and is getting nervous. You have to be more vocal... in that you what him to be more aggressive and what you like. He might be holding back, because he doesn't want to pressure you.

Main thin is you Have to talk to him about it... see where you stand and what he's thinking about. Tell him that he's not hurting you/won't break you if he is more aggressive and it actually feels so much better. Him knowing that might get him past this speed bump in your relationship.

[AustinMan]

Maybe some of these My Takes I've written will be helpful. Take a look and let me know.

www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a7025-why-are-men-reluctant-to-dominate-women-sexually

www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a7250-safe-words-how-do-i-get-my-partner-to-dominate-me-in-bed

[Miss_Lola]

Well have a one in one cinversation with him. Tell him the problems your fears and i guys talk it out... or Try getting on top and having ur way instead

[Browneye57]

Talk about it outside the bedroom. Typical that a woman wants to be dominated but the men just don't get it - they're afraid of offending or hurting. Tell him you want him to fuck your brains out. Maybe he'll get the hint.

The problem I see is that if it's this frustrating now how will it be down the road? Sex tends to be raw and visceral in the beginning, tapering off over the long haul. If it's this dull now, what does your future hold?

[Flurr]

Ride him hard so he knows what you mean and realizes he doesn't have to be THAT gentle. Also if the condom is too tight he will go soft real fast, maybe he is avg length but a little thicker.

[Anonymous]

Just be honest with him. How he adapts will really tell. As far as him being experienced or not is irrelevant as each person is different and is pleased by different things. You could be a good lay to one person and a bad lay to another. No such thing as one size fits all in sex. What does matter is if your partner is patient and willing to learn.