If a girl smacks a guy’s ass, does he have the moral right to smack her face?

[Anonymous]

A girl posted a question about this, but the genders reversed. I answered that of course a girl who’s been smacked on the ass without consent has the right to smack the smacker’s face. But I also mentioned that I have been the victim of sexual assault too. Girls have slapped me on the ass. If I go to a club, on average I have a 50% chance of being assaulted, based on prior experience. A male friend of mine was even the victim of an attempted rape by a girl! So, I said that girls should bear in mind that they are not the only victims of this and that guys also have the right to defend themselves. Legally of course men and women have the same right of self-defence. But apparently many girls do not like gender equality when women lose out because of it… judging by the reactions to my answer. So, girls and guys, do you believe that a guy has a moral right to smack a girl who’s smacked his ass without his consent?

[Kshppatel]

I don't know about other guys but I just feel really weird when a girl slaps my ass. Not weird as in sexually uncomfortable but it's just weird. I wouldn't slap a girl if she slapped my ass though. I only slap asses of girls who I well not random strangers. Usually I give off the vibe that I'm doing it as a joke so there's no slapping of my face. I feel like some women hit guys just because they know they can and there will be no real consequences that come from it. I've only been hit by one girl who was my ex girlfriend and in my opinion I didn't really do anything wrong I just called her on her bs. I think it's wrong to hit people just because you feel like you can get away with it.

[Anonymous]

I had my ass smacked by a strange girl a few times. When I crossed paths with a stripper I met at my buddy's birthday at the world naked bike ride, I got my ass smacked by her. This time I was naked and she saw me. So things sort of evened out, and I deserved it because I'm a dirty boy. Another time I got my ass grabbed at a Halloween party at a really loud night club. Some girl approached me, said something I couldn't hear, groped me and left. I wasn't offended, but I thought WTF was that about?

[julietxrose]

I think people should just keep their hands to themselves. Period. If you smack my ass, you're going to get a dirty look. I don't think women have any more right than men to be physically violent. It used to drive me crazy when some of my female friends would get irritated with their boyfriends and kick them in their junk. They thought it was hilarious, but it was just really disrespectful in my opinion. So, I agree with you that some girls think its a one-way street and that they can just act however they want. But people need to stop thinking they're entitled to put their hands on someone just because they feel like it- sexually, violently, or otherwise.

[sandral18]

i agree with you

[Anonymous]

This is a tough one because MOST men take being smacked on the ass as a flirt/compliment, but MOST women take it sexual harassment. If she smacked you on the ass it's an invitation to smack her ass too, but my knee jerk reaction was "Holy F**k, how could any guy think it's OK to hit a woman!" But when you point out that is a role reversal, it really made me stop and think. Times are changing, and women are just as aggressive as men these days. Women will intentionally try to hit as hard as they can because we are programmed to think men don't feel pain and that they naturally hit harder. You're absolutely right and you've opened my mind here tonight.

[Asker]

Interesting. Though most of my male friends' reactions to being ass-slapped were negative (not offended as such, but bewildered, clearly troubled by it but trying to laugh it off), I agree with your implication that far more men than women would find it acceptable to be ass-slapped (though post-hoc acceptance doesn't equal consent). I'd be interested to see a poll about how many people know that it's illegal for a woman to ass-slap a man versus how many know it's illegal for a man to ass-slap a woman. I'd guess that a healthy majority would know it's illegal for a man to ass-slap a woman, but I think the number of people who know it's illegal for a woman to ass-slap a man would be much lower. I suspect that has some effect on the difference in perception of acceptability.

[Anonymous]

You don't have the right to physically hit ANYONE. Male or female. Now, you can curse them out and yell at them all you want and if they continue advances *then* you can hit them, but generally first time, no.
But I do think that it's just as morally wrong to touch someone without consent as it is to hit them, but two wrongs don't make a right unless they're just being a persistent asshole in which case I feel like you still shouldn't exert full force on the person. Maybe you could grab her arm firmly and push her away, but slapping would be like last resort type thing if they're trying to get to 3rd base without consent or something

[Asker]

OK, thank you for your view on the morality of it. But why did so many people say it's OK when a woman smacks a man on the face for smacking her ass? Maybe you need to give a dissenting opinion: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q964067-if-a-guy-smacks-a-girl-s-a-does-she-have-the-right-to-smack-his

[Opinion Owner]

As far as the woman goes I'd do the same thing. If you smack my butt in a club I'm going to curse your ass out and then if you continue to try to do shit I'm going to try to push you away and then last resort for me is to try and make a scene (probably by breaking a glass or something since a club is loud or FINAL resort to slap you because people are going to pay attention to that). I usually give people plenty of warning before I use violence in any situation (well.. no if you frighten me I'm sorry but I just might hit you honestly it's just a natural instinct I'm not even kidding I've hit my MOM before if she came around a corner too fast and grabbed my shoulder. I would never hurt my mom, but you know sometimes instinct kicks in) but I try to be a nonviolent individual

[Melshey]

You don't have the right to physically hit her because you could get assault charges cause it's just how it works. However you can yell or whatever but don't hit a girl ever

[Asker]

No, trust me, legally you do. It's called self-defence.

[Asker]

That's why I asked you what your MORAL view is.

[Melshey]

Morally you shouldn't hit a girl who smacks your ass. And it's not self defense to smack her because she smacked your ass. She is not hurting you that could be a way of flirting for some girls.

[catguy]

how do you know she isn't hurting him?

[Asker]

No, sorry, please no one try to lecture me on the law. I am a lawyer. In English law (and in many legal systems derived from it), non-consensual touching of a sexual nature is sexual assault. You have the right to defend yourself against sexual assault. Men and women have the equal legal right of self-defence. It doesn't matter how trivial the touching is. Assault is assault. That said, thank you for your moral view.

[julietxrose]

Sorry, but I'm with the asker on this one. You didn't state your views on whether females are right in hitting a guy who smacked her ass. But if you agree with that, then it would be sexist of you to imply that from the girl's perspective, the sexual assault is "flirting".

[Melshey]

If she is like spanking you hard then slap the bitch if she doesn't hurt you then shouldn't slap her

[SeraphenaAngel]

I am laughing at sexual harassment at a guy. I have never seen a man that wouldn't welcome sexual harassment. In fact I don't think that phrase is even in their genetic makeup.

[Asker]

Well, then, you clearly don't know many men very well.

[SeraphenaAngel]

I know a lot of men-look at my age. Most men would like it if I smacked their butts. They most certainly would not smack me back.

[bubbiexo]

Yeah, I don't see a difference. I would slap the shit out of a guy I didn't know if he slapped my ass. I couldn't get upset if I smacked a guy's ass without his consent, there is no reason he shouldn't be allowed to smack me. Harassment is harassment in my opinion.

[Hrothgar]

Absolutely not! A man should only slap a woman if it's the last resort. We may think we've progressed (more like regressed) beyond polite society, but the laws sure haven't; and I am thankful for that. If a woman slaps your backside and you don't like it, ignore her: that's much worse than slapping her.

[Hrothgar]

Who raises you people anyway?

[Asker]

No, the law says you have the right of self-defence. That's why I asked for your MORAL view only. Please read the question.

[Hrothgar]

North Carolina General Statute - Chapter 14, Article 8 § 14-33.1. Evidence of former threats upon plea of self-defense. In any case of assault, assault and battery, or affray in which the plea of the defendant is self-defense, evidence of former threats against the defendant by the person alleged to have been assaulted by him, if such threats shall have been communicated to the defendant before the altercation, shall be competent as bearing upon the reasonableness of the claim of apprehension by the defendant of bodily harm, and also as bearing upon the amount of force which reasonably appeared necessary to the defendant, under the circumstances, to repel his assailant. (1969, c. 618, s. 2.)

[Asker]

And?

[Hrothgar]

And let me verbally assault you by saying you are a Blackguard and a coward if you hit a woman for smacking your backside.

[Asker]

It's not an assault, in a legal sense, to criticize me. You're entitled to your opinion.

[Hrothgar]

You're taking this equality sham farther than it ever needed to go. Women's suffrage may have tried to kill Chivalry, but it's alive and strong in North Carolina. You do not hit a woman because she flirted with you, unless you want a room full of rednecks and hillbillies to correct your poor actions.

[Asker]

Hahahah. Well, then, those men would be in for assault charges too. How low must the quality of women be in North Carolina that smacking a man's ass without consent is widely viewed as an ordinary and acceptable mating signal. Was there some cross-species breeding with monkeys a while back?

[Hrothgar]

I shall politely refrain from continuing this conversation further with you, sir.

[Asker]

Hahaha. Now you decide to be polite. Better late than never, of course.

[christinalong338]

you just compared the women he knows to monkeys. you were impolite first. SIR

[christinalong338]

saying "you don't hit a woman" is hardly impolite.

[Asker]

So, we have an illiterate here as well. You evidently failed to read where he called me a blackguard and a coward. Now, that I think about it, 'coward' is not only rude: it is nonsensical. Someone who smacks someone may be many things, but cowardly certainly isn't one of them. He certainly isn't the only person to misuse the word 'coward'. The media do it all the time. I suppose it's yet another sign of the decay of language.

[Hrothgar]

Actually a coward is also defined as a timid or easily intimidated person. One can deduce that you are intimidated by a woman touching your delicate backside if you react by slapping her. A confident person would laugh.

[Asker]

So a confident woman would laugh at being touched. You've changed your mind then!

[Hrothgar]

Ooh! Gotcha!

[Matt_Wreede]

I know where were these people raised? I think that the south is the place that doesn't have a bunch of pussys living in it. I swear if my girlfriend or anyone of my friends that is a girl ever got hit by a guy that guy would get some sense knocked into him.

[Bysshe]

"If a woman slaps your backside and you don't like it, ignore her: that's much worse than slapping her." Would you suggest that if the genders were reversed?

[Hrothgar]

Yes, Mr. Wreede, I agree. Bysshe, I would recommend women resume calling men "fresh" and slapping them if men get fresh with them; that is the expected response in polite society.

[shacodraco]

I'm all about equality but we can't just returns that men and women are the same because it's just not true. We are kind of complete opposites if you haven't noticed and a guys reaction to getting his ass slapped by a girl is usually not the same as a girls mostly because of the slut/player double standard which will never ever go away.

Basically what I am saying is any guy who slaps a girl for slapping his ass is a punk and should get a sex change.

[PrettyBama]

No lol a ass smack never justifies a face slap. It's not the same.

[rthomas43]

It's one of the double standards that I feel is appropriate. Unless a woman that has the capability to really hurt you is attacking you, you have no business laying a finger on her.

[TadCurious]

It's a double standard, sure, but a guy never is justified in hitting a girl.

[AndyWes]

White Knights, they're everywhere...

[Scorpio909]

If a woman is holding a knife and threatening me I'm feel very justified in beating her.

[dominiquois]

@Scorpio909: You wouldn’t even have to beat her, you would just need to grab her qnd fling theknife away because you're a lot stronger.

[Asker]

@dominiquoi thinks a man should sacrifice himself to a woman who's trying to kill him. Not all men are stronger than all women. Should a strong woman sacrifice herself to a weaker man with a knife?

[Scorpio909]

@dominiquois: That is bullshit. Gender doesn't determine strength.

[rthomas43]

@Scorpio909 "Gender doesn't determine strength". Are you mentally ill?

[Scorpio909]

@rthomas43 No I'm just someone who sees the world as it is. The are women who are stronger that most guys. Female bodybuilders for example.

[rthomas43]

@Scorpio909 And who is stronger than female bodybuilders? Male bodybuilders. Men are a lot stronger than women. You can not deny that.

[Scorpio909]

@rthomas43 You completely missed the point of that.

[rthomas43]

@scorpio909 No, I get it. There exist women that are stronger than most men. But let's be real, women like that are exceptionally rare. If a female bodybuilder makes you feel threatened, by all means, fuck her up.

[Scorpio909]

It's not just about bodybuilders but any woman. Some women may look weak, but I've seen them kick the ass of a big football player. So my point stands that gender doesn't decided strength.

[dominiquois]

@rthomas43: lolololol! @Scorpio909: Seriously, what planet do you descend from?

[Scorpio909]

@dominiquois One with common sense.

[Matt_Wreede]

If you hit a girl you are not a man, if a girl slapped my ass I would never hit her. I was raised in North Carolina and we are taught to never ever hit a girl. I honestly can't even believe this is a question. I don't know where you guys come from but never touch a girl in a violent way

[Asker]

You honestly can't believe any man would consider self defense against a woman...

[Asker]

On contrary... South DOES have a bunch of pussies in it. Southern men are SO scared of losing access to pussy that theyre willing to be treated like subhumans by their women

[Asker]

Then again South does have a history of treating people like subhumans hahahaha

[Matt_Wreede]

Really? I'm sorry but that's not true at all. You know nothing about the south. And we don't accept being treated sub-human by women. I'm saying that a guy shouldn't hit a girl cause she touched my ass. I just wouldn't hit a girl. Should be killed for saying that?

[Shyguy_1988]

No, there is a difference between male and female, we are not equal due to the differences. On average girls are smaller and more fragile then males, if a guy slaps a girl it hurts a lot more than the girl slapping the guy. Regardless she should learn to keep her hands to herself, but hitting someone isn't the proper way to go about it.

[Asker]

But not all girls are. If you wanna be fair you should say... if a smaller person of either gender assaults you, you're not allowed to hit back

[Bysshe]

Or you need to hit them softly... Best to just report it.

[Shyguy_1988]

Girl's bodies are different in general, stop acting like men and women are the same thing and not noticing the clear differences. On average a male has 50% more strength than that of a female, also a males reproductive system is no were near as complex as a females. There is clear differences here so this whole "equality" thing is just going to far.

[Asker]

On average yeah... But there are many women stronger, bigger than the average man. That's why if you wanna be fair, you should say a smaller weaker person should not be hit back regardless of genders

[bubbletrouble]

I don't know since most guys would seem to do nothing in the situation.

[Babs83]

I kind of find it amazing that this is such an issue. Don't hit each other, first rule of kindergarten. I honestly have never had my ass slapped while out and about. If it happened I know I would not slap someone, we don't live in noir film, shit does not have to be that dramatic. And no, don't slap a woman either.

[Asker]

You can't control the other person's mind though. So you're evading the question

[Babs83]

If someone slaps your ass don't act as though you were actually assaulted, you want to go there then go to a women's shelter and find out what real assault is. You are validated in not wanting to be touched that's your right but going to the extreme of thinking its ok to slap someone is ridiculous. Man or woman!!! Don't be an assclown, there no avoiding a question there.

[Babs83]

Hell, stick evading in there take out avoiding ass clown.

[Asker]

It is an assault. Women's shelter? I would tell you to go visit a men's shelter (since 70% of partner violence in hetero relationships is woman on man, not man on woman) but there are barely any

[Asker]

You're upset cause I accused you of evading. But you are evading. You say "Don't hit each other" like I can control what other people do. I can't.

[Babs83]

I am answering your question, have done so twice. No one is upset, who can get upset from a typed message. Are you upset now and all slap happy? Better stay inside for a while, have some herbal tea.

[Asker]

If you're not upset why calling me an 'ass clown'?

[Anonymous]

People should just stop smacking each other. Bitches needs to stop hitting guys in the face, that shit hurts.

[Anonymous]

Look in either situation I don't believe that the person should smack the person who slapped their bottom unless you have asked this person to stop an they continue to smack your ass but if the person meant it as a joke no you don't have the right to slap someone over something so stupid an guys you are forgetting that females are females an males are males so that makes it look bad if you slap a girl for such a stupid reason.. calmly ask her not to do it again an if she continues yell stop

[Asker]

It's funny how the 'you shouldn't hit back' types only come out for this kind of question. When it's a question of the woman hitting the man back all yous are in hiding!

[Anonymous]

Talk about a way to ruin it all when she's simply trying to flirt with you. She probably does that because there aren't too many good, attractive guys in one city, let alone the whole country. She doesn't think about sleeping with you when doing this; it's playful and a way of saying ''I think you're cute, wanna talk''.

Now we have extremists guys apparently. No, apples and oranges aren't exactly the same. Get that in your mind.

[Asker]

Is a woman who doesn't want her ass touched without her consent an 'extremist' too?

[Opinion Owner]

Oh dear now we're having absolute equality extremist guys reacting exactly like a girl ''Omg, I'm so scared... I have to slap you now''. You know why is not the same if some stranger at a later time does that to me. We have to deal with the possibility of getting assaulted further or even worse, get rape. Guys generally don't feel threatened by a woman slapping his ass. At most he would feel annoyed but not an ''Omg, you pervert'' thing.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah apparently more men are acting/reacting like women.

[Asker]

Have you ever been a man who's had his ass slapped by a woman?

Actually men are very likely to get assaulted further and raped. 43% of teen boys and college men have been forced into sexual behavior. In 95% of cases, the attackers are females. www.apa.org/.../coerced-sex.aspx

[Opinion Owner]

Thank you for the fact but we still faced more assaults than men. It's a fact and statistics don't lie. Yes, we know there will always be bad women and sick female pedo (yes, there is always someone that has to make an exception) but prisons has more male inmates than females still. To answer your question, that's how one of my female friends met her now bf. She groped him and well he liked it.

[Asker]

I've just given you a stat that close to half of men have been sexually assaulted by women. And that's just counting the first two decades of life. It's probably well over half by the end of a lifetime. So don't make it sound like it's a small minority Good thing for her that her bf doesn't have any self respect.

[Anonymous]

I'd love it if a girl smacked my ass.

In fact I'd demand she did it again.

I'm often a very naughty boy that needs a good ass smacking.

[Anonymous]

Self defence and retaliation/punishment are separate things, unless the slap is actually in self defence, any punishment/discipline should be left for the authorities to deal with. Report him/her, only hit them if you need to.

[Anonymous]

nobody is justified to hit anyone in less it is a life or death situation girls can hit guys when there attacking them thats it

[Anonymous]

Sexual assault - a staterory crime where one knowingly causes another person to engage in an unwanted sexual act by force or threat.

A smack on the butt doesn't even qualify as "sexual assault". So stop dramatically throwing that term around loosely.
There are Indian women who have been gang raped and would roll their eyes at you victimizing yourself.
There are African babies who have been raped before their sexual reproductive organs even fully developed and this post mocks them.

Understand how incredibly dramatic and self-absorbed you sound like you're trying hard to make a gender equality debate where it barely exists.

[Anonymous]

If a girl slaps or hits a guy its no big deal even in public in the bar a girl slapped me and the bouncer just split us apart. If I slapped a girl I would of gotten kicked out the bar or had the cops called on me.

[julietxrose]

I'm curious as to why you think a girl hitting a guy is no big deal? What is your take on a 200lb. girl hitting a 120lb. guy?

[Opinion Owner]

I never said it wasn't a big deal in most cases a guy is stronger than a female.

[julietxrose]

"If a girl slaps or hits a guy its no big deal" But you still didn't answer my hypothetical question about a stronger woman hitting a weaker guy. I promise I'm not trying to be difficult, I just want to know what you think since we have opposing views.

[Opinion Owner]

That's the way its seen as not being a big deal. Like I said what happened at the bar the girl slapped me and she still stayed at the bar we just got separated if I slapped her I would of been done.