Is sex really "that" important in a relationship?

Is sex really that important in a relationship?
Don't get me wrong, sex IS important in a relationship, after all, bad sex can end one, but is it as important as some people make it out to be? Short term or friends with benefits relationships aside, if you were to map the entirety of your last long term relationship, was the number 1 or 2 or 3 thing keeping you in that relationship and keeping you happy, actually the sex?

I can't imagine that to be true because let's say they got sick with something like cancer, and weren't in the mood for various obvious reasons, would you just break up---I feel like if sex were the be all, end all, or as important as some people made it out to be, more people would break up a lot sooner.
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Problems around sex are, in fact, one of the major reasons people break up. In marriages, they're top two (the other being finances).

    In a serious relationship, sex certainly isn't everything, but it's absolutely one of the top 3-4. I should note that it's not so much that sex is critical, but feeling wanted by your partner.

    I'm in a marriage that's ended up sexless, not only is it a huge hole, but that infects the rest of the emotional side as well.

    You bring up the case of 'cancer'. I will give you another example: you probably think 'talking to your partner' is important. But what if you or your partner lost their hearing? Well most of us would seek medical care, and perhaps start learning sign language. We'd find a way to communicate. On the other hand, if they rarely want to talk to you, or decide they don't want to talk to you again - you'd break up.

    It's the same idea around sex. If your partner can't have sex, you try to fix it. If they're temporarily too sick, you wait. If they rarely want you, or decide they don't want sex again, it's "that" important.

  • Sex is the #1 issue sited for divorce (of which, 77% are initiated by women), with money/finances being #2. I'd say that speaks pretty clearly to the point that sex is pretty damn important to the long-term success of a relationship, yes.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Sex is very important in a relationship. It's not something that the relationship should be built on (like not the foundation of it) but it's more like... a very critical reinforcement of sorts for the love you two have for each other?

    Which doesn't mean that if my boyfriend got sick, I'd leave him. Sex being a way that kind of feels like it affirms my love for my boyfriend (and vice versa) is situational. Like... when either of us have been super stressed or sick in the past, it obviously wasn't necessary to have sex. In situations like that, emotional support would be far more appropriate.

  • Sex is important. Would I break up a long term relationship because my partner was ill no. But if he is healthy yes sex would need to be part of the picture.

    • I agree with you 100%. Sex does play an important part in a relationship because it maintains a level of intimacy that both people need in order to succeed.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Barring the unforeseen like you mentioned, sex is THE engine that drives intimate relationships.

  • That would depend on each persons feelings on sex.

  • Sex is an important structured part of every relationship because it creates, connects and cements the re6as a whole to insure that the energies, fears, hopes, and longevity are shared in the process. We love we care we nurture and we teach. We work together completely or it just doesn't work.

  • For my ex, it was.
    Our 5 year relationship ended because I had a lower sex drive.
    She then went on to date a tv show actor, who she broke up with for the same reason after a year.

    So, clearly, for some people sex is quite important.
    If they can end long term relationships over it, and even dump hot and famous people for it, lol.

  • Yeah it's pretty important. Not sure what its like to be a girl, but I can confidently say that it's no fun to know you're not gonna have sex for a long time. I couldn't willingly put myself in a relationship with someone that didn't want to have sex.

  • People do break up over it.

  • yes. very.

  • sex is only important to whoever seeks for sex in a relationship, depends on the guy is all ima say

  • The relationship gets full-filling when I fill her with my cum.

  • Sex does play an important part in a relationship because it maintains a level of intimacy that both people need in order to succeed.

  • It's not the most important thing for starting a relationship, but it is still essential. Building a life together quickly becomes more important.

  • Is oxygen "that" important to live?

  • It depends on what type of sex and all the whys behind it.

  • Yes it is very important to me.

  • In a relationship it’s important that the two people get along and have respect

  • Sex is definitely part of a relationship. If you don't like sex that much you're just going to have to find a partner that just does not like sex that much. But if you don't like to have sex very much and your partner wants to have sex all the time, you're going to either need to compromise and work together or find somebody who doesn't want to have sex all the time LOL

  • a sexless relationship, isn't a relationship

    it's a friendship

    with a relationship label

    that's not a relationship

    • Actually a relationship is only one in which two people share a connection so a friendship and a relationship-relationship can have similar connotations, but I digress, for those, like myself that do care about sex in a relationship, my point is not to ask, 'can you live without the sex indefinitely,' but just that it's not on the highest top of my list of why I am with a boyfriend in a long term relationship.

    • a relationship is two people, who have sex

  • To me it is

  • How else do I make my girlfriend pregnant

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