What do you think about Friends with Benefits?

Question

Apope16 · Accepted Answer

I love it. I have had several. Right now I have a friends with benefits. The sex is good but relationship wise we wouldn't work. But it is just nice to be able to chat with someone about life without any filters. There is pretty much this brutal honesty because you aren't trying to impress the other person. She could be like, "I am so tired. I dont feel like shaving my legs." Then I could be like, "Yeah? Just relax. Come on over and lets fuck." The same with pubic hair or something. Its just someone that you can be yourself around and randomly fuck the shit out of them.

But I also draw certain boundaries. LIke she started calling me "baby" after sex. So I had to nip that in the bud because it was too "relationship-ish". And there are certain activities that we dont do together because it blurs the lines. Like I didn't want to go grocery shopping with her after sex. And one time I invited her to go on a run and work out with me and she said no. So we set boundaries based on our feelings of intimacy and comfort.

Anyway, friends with benefits is the best thing thats happened to me. I have had some amazing sex with some hot women. Felt the pleasure of different kinds of pussy. Had sex with fat chics, skinny chics, hot chics, average chics. Really learned how to be a good lover.

Some FWBs because girlfriends and long term relationships. Some best friends that I have done sexual stuff with led to us just going back to being platonic best friends without major issue.

It depends on your maturity. It depends on whether you are able to separate your feelings of lust and pleasure from the logic of love and compatibility. People who dont have that skill can't do it. Most importantly, you have to be able to communicate directly with shit. People who can't communicate their feelings will only get hurt.

Lastly, there IS a chance that you could fall in love and feel heart ache. I did fall in love with one girl and she figured it out. She eventually moved away.

ArrowheadSW · Accepted Answer

Most of the people who I've known who have done this, the two really weren't "friends" at all. One lady I know was hurt over it because after years of this, she realized that she really wasn't part of the guy's life at all. One example was it took 4 years for the guy to take her on a dinner date. I can see the point if they are dating but don't want to be involved with every aspect of the other person's life. But the cases that I've known those involved weren't really even dating.

But there are others here on this board who claim that the arrangement works for them! If that is the case I can't argue against what works for them.

It will be interesting to see what responses you get to this post.

Shanesia_OTS · Accepted Answer

I don't mean to sound like a total whore. But I've had many (not more than one at the same time & never whilst in a relationship).

And to be completely honest if your looking to fufil any sexual needs you may have without a partner seriously interfering your everyday, preffered life style or business affairs. Then its the best way to go.

For me I choose to stick with friends with benefits at present for pretty generic reasons. I need to work on myself more. That & the fact that iM sCaReD I'd be a pretty shit partner & vice versa.

Not only that but I literally am too busy with work, life and community projects that FwB's work so much better. Whenever I'm rowdy I just hit up my dude, meet up, go bangbang & then head home sleep like a baby in comfort. Don't have to worry about anything you'd normally have to worry about in a normal relo.

You just wanna get experience prior to settling down?
Go for it!

You've been offered to be friends with benefits but your after something serious with the person?
You can try convince them to 'fall' but I personally wouldn't bother. Only looking for possible disappointment.

If you have other questions let me know.

chrissykerdock · Accepted Answer

i'm involved in a serious friends with benefits it' s mostly blowjobs and he eats my pussy sometimes not everytime... he's 5 3 i'm 5 10 so I was at 1st not interested but then I realized I need a cock to suck... so I had him over he was very nice not pushy at all but loved it when I did blow him plus he was fun to have over and he cooked pretty good as well... we're pretty much seeing each other often there's no dates... no where to go anyway but to a grocery store... and most importantly I absolutely am glad I have his cock to suck most nights so it's fine with me having friends with benefits plus he said if I blow him whenever he wants he won't cheat on me which I like a lot.

AustinMan · Answer

For me, it's fraught with peril. I need a close emotional attachment before sex and that sort of flies in the face of friends with benefits.

CoffeePossum · Answer

I think it's stupid and will never have one, but if someone else has them and is happy with it then you do you.
But I think the name is wrong, i've never heard of friends with benefits actually being friends, just an easy hookup option when one is horny

Petra150 · Answer

Could anybody try to explain what a friend with benefits mean, I'm Danish so please tell in plain words

Awkwardman36 · Answer

Doesn't work for me and in my experience kinda ruin friendships when u get into a real relationship again. However I need commitment and monogamy to really enjoy and be comfortable in sex so that may just be me.

yrdady · Answer

It's great and a joy and source of great sex and pleasure in between relationships. If you want a serious relationship with a person, communicate clearly.

Red_Arrow · Answer

We all have urges, but many of us are often not in a relationship. FWBs are more reliable and usually safer than ONSs with pickups or trusting club hookups.

RunawayGirl · Answer

I think its a great idea to have friends with benefits, cause that way you can always have someone to have sex with, without the emotional attachment. Though in my experience, being friends with benefits is what lead to my main emotional attachment.

I-am-a-nobody · Answer

It's almost as stupid as 100+ genders.
Good way to really mess up the relationships between men and women.
This are much better when they are well defined. There's less chance for lying, corruption and heartbreak.

Tamera952 · Answer

That it’s complicated and usually doesn’t work out

bluehen46 · Answer

As long as both are in agreement there is nothing wrong with it. Often it means a 1 and 1 relationship and thus both parties are safer. I had several in college and one became more eventually. I did not marry her but would have and if we were both available again would pursue her. Now if one has an agenda the other does not there can be issues. I had one of those but was not awre at the time she felt that way.

Mellifluous_ · Answer

Not my thing.

Aislin9 · Answer

It's a casual relationship between two people that will most likely end badly, possibly with an unwanted pregnancy and STD as well.

Finchie40 · Answer

It can be ok if you are both on the same page with things but usually 1 starts falling harder for the other then it gets bad or it could get good as well if the other starts having the same feelings back

Celtero · Answer

Kinda gross. Like... You dislike each other enough not to want a relationship but you'll tolerate one another so you can smush parts together regularly... okay. Seems more optimal just to find a quality relationship partner but I guess people are lazy when it comes to that nowadays so whatever.

JoyGirl · Answer

I mean, some people don't get attached, and are ok with it. For me, I know for sure I will get attached, so I am not even going to test those waters.  (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.)