Why doesn’t people want a wait till marriage anymore?

[karleeexoxoxo]

God created the purpose sex in a marriage is a beautiful bound with for husband and wife but we use it for selfish desires because this culture is over. Sexualize everything , that’s why there porn addiction, men treated women disrespectful, stds, abortion, nobody sees the beauty of how created it, they just said it’s religious but God is just wants to protect us, he made sex for a purpose and it’s not for selfish desire, because we don’t know if that person with our forever person, we don’t know the future so makes me mad how people are not aware sex outside marriage is wrong and how they leaves your life destruction , sex clouds your judgment I don’t care what magazine social media friends SEX IS NOT THE MOST IMPORTANT IN THE WORLD, a lot women just don’t have respect anymore, they hookup whoever they want and when they got there heartbroken

[MrOracle]

Very simply, because for all of human history through the late 1960s, the average age of marriage for women was about 19, and many women married as young as 14 or 15 (both my grandmothers, who couldn't have been more different, were married at 15). Since the onslaught of Third Wave Feminism, the average age of marriage for women is 30 in the US and 31 (nearly 32) in the UK, and even older in some western countries.

THAT is the aberration here - it's not normal for humans to wait so long to pair off, and it completely wastes women's most fertile years - her 20s, when it's easiest to conceive and when she's most likely to have healthy children - because Feminism has pushed her to go to college right out of high school, then build a career, and don't forget some "hot girl summer" - before even thinking about a relationship. Humans weren't made to do that - we were made to pair up in our late teens and have children in our 20s.

And let's be real: virtually no one, ESPECIALLY not men, are going to wait until their 30s for sex if they can possibly help it. Waiting for marriage is only realistic if you are going to be able to marry young, but since marrying young has been absolutely demonized by Feminists - who specifically set out to DESTROY marriage - then no one is going to wait today.

As long as women embrace Feminism, and teach Feminist ideas to their kids and allow it to be taught in schools, churches, and other institutions, then nothing will change. Realize that it was FEMINISM that MADE the change and moved society AWAY from waiting until marriage, so that would need to be UNdone by the same people who forced the change in the first place: women.

[HaveNoName]

Excellent commentary!!

[TheSpaceGnome]

Valid. I'm still waiting in my mid 30s, but thats out of caution in avoiding peril (stds/unplanned births/conflicting personalities), forcing me to be extremely selective, I don't actually want to wait.

[mickmrly]

I think that people don’t wait for marriage anymore because our modern economic system has made the necessities of life take so long to attain that it is incredibly difficult to wait many years to satisfy your hormonal urges. In the past you could get set up with the basics relatively young and then find someone and successfully start a family together rather quickly. If people had the money and stable job environment to get married earlier, I believe they would and then they wouldn’t need to fret about waiting because they would already be ready to support a spouse and family.

If people do have enough money and stability to get married and they just play around instead, then that’s a whole other issue. My cousin got a house together with her boyfriend 7 years ago and only got married this year. I still don’t know why they waited really, especially as they would have been defacto anyway. 🤔

[mermaidcancermoon]

Not everyone you find attractive will be sexually compatible with you, this is why many do not want to wait. Being incompatible in bed can make marriages sexless and disappointing after all of the hype surrounding waiting. Its much like wanting to try a new restaurant or videogame and in the end... it sucks terribly. You can't "teach" each other when you're incompatible in bed. Its like forcing each other to change the things they find arousing. It takes the fun out of it. You can only "teach" someone when you like the same things.

By incompatible i mean
fast vs slow, aggressive versus gentle, talkative versus quiet, spontaneity versus routine, dominant partner versus submissive, certain lovers preferring to always be on the bottom or vice versa. All of these traits come natural to each person, but when you dont align sexually, it can make that part of the relationship lackluster to where marriage is more businesdlike and friendly than a lover's affair.

Walking down the aisle in total oblivion to what each of you like in bed is a huuuugge gamble. This is one of the main reasons they end up teaching sex to be "not important". Because waiting until after you're married to explore what you like, usually ends in only tumbling when you want to have kids a few times a year. It is possible that some couples end up matching, but usually this percentage is quite low with abstinent couples. I do not agree with waiting for this very reason. A test drive is a must.

[karleeexoxoxo]

That’s the problem, a lot of people look at sex Islas act, it’s not.. it’s emotional spiritual mental connection and people have it all backwards.. just because you have sexless marriage doesn’t mean your marriage is bad, it means you to have conversation and if you going to relationship base on if the sex is good or bad then you going to the wrong Reason and selfish reason because your heart is in the wrong, a lot of people they inlove with there boyfriend and girlfriend but the reality is you don’t love that person, you love how they make you feel in the bedroom, it’s sad but it’s the truth , people confused lust and love and that’s just reality… nobody know what true love is anymore.. they think is sex and that is just the mind that we have been thought by social media , Friends , tv shows and the list goes on

[mermaidcancermoon]

Its important to have both in a relationship. Degrading one for the other is wishful thinking. Emotional connection AND great sex. Your narrative only works when both partners are content with little to no sex for loooonnng periods of time.

[purplepoppy]

Because back then you got married at 10 years old and died before you hit 30. Even a few generations ago women were expected to get married soon as they left school.

Times have changed, the days of grabbing the first guy you see are long gone. Now we get to try tonnes of dick before tying the knot.

[dustybiker]

Sex is a big part of marriage. If you don’t match with drive or all other variables it is a big deal.

[Apple1996]

I don't get the point in waiting till marriage like I need to know everything about a person before marrying them and that includes having sex to make sure we are sexually compatible.

[Berethor]

Many people nowadays don't believe in God, personally I respect virgin girls, they not hos.

[Summeroflove]

I would be fine with a woman who genuinely repented. As long as you’re not a hypocrite. Amen!!! Although. You can’t tell a man virgin unfortunately for women

[Emilyis]

I was a virgin on my wedding night at the ripe old age of 21 and it wasn't until we were in bed that I realized it was his first time too because he kept trying to put it in my butt, He wasn't exactly sure where the vulva was actually located.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Marriage believe it not is starting to become a thing of the past & marriage is like a hurricane there is a lot of blowing in the beginning & when it’s all said & done your house is gone. As for marriage what happens if you get married & the sex sucks or you don’t have enough of it? This is why people cheat & if people aren’t getting enough sex in a relationship they are probably getting it outside of the relationship. On the other hand it’s like buying a new car & before you commit & sign the papers you want to test drive the car first because you wouldn’t want to get stuck with a lemon.

[TheUniqueOne96]

Because not everyone believes in god or religion, so why should they care about a bunch of rules that have no relevance to them.

Anyone can sit their and say their beliefs are right, whether they're religious or not, one person believing XYZ doesn't make them right, especially if they only follow it due to being born into it.

Even then, to what extent a person follows their beliefs is their own choice, because not everyone cares to be lectured by a selective sinner who's fine committing sins that benefit them and then judges those who do it differently - religion has a ton of rules, so almost no one is perfect when it comes down to it.

[EmmaMary]

Someone has already beaten me to putting my usual comment to this sort/type of question.

[UnknownPuppet]

Because it is not normal. You are a human being. You have hormones. It is not normal to act like you do not have them.

[mrmonogamous]

I don't think that you have to be married. What if you good out until marriage and then find out that you're not sexually compatible with your spouse? My personal belief is that sex belongs in a long term committed and monogamous relationship. I first had sex at 17 with the first girl I was "in love" with. I never had sex with anyone I wasn't in a relationship with. I've only had sec with five women. I married number 5.


There is nothing wrong with premarital sex. The problem lies with uncommitted sex. Hook ups, fuck buddy's, and one night stands are what has ruined the true meaning of sex. Sex is the most intimate form of communication a living couple has. It should be reserved for love. That's my thought.

[slatyb]

One day someone figured out that you can draw in dirt with a stick. The first thing they drew was a phallus.

"God created the purpose sex in a marriage is a beautiful bound with for husband and wife "

How do you know what God wants? All those things people say about God's motivations are just stuff they made up to suit their own preferences. What do we really know? Among mammals, primates including humans are the most sexually active. Human females are perpetually fertile. It seems clear to me that God made us to have sex constantly.

The reasons for remaining chaste until marriage no longer apply. They have been made moot by technology and increasing life expectancy. Girls used to marry in their mid to late teens, not long after menarche. They were expected to remain chaste until marriage to prevent unwanted pregnancies and STDs. Now many people wait until their mid-twenties. Few are willing to remain chaste for ten years.

[20yearsolder]

Who performed the wedding ceremony for Adam and Eve? I don't want to marry somebody that sucks in the bedroom. You do what works for you and stop judging others. Not everybody lives your lifestyle

[karleeexoxoxo]

It’s not judgment, it’s reality…a lot of people are living false reality,, they confused lust over love, a lot of people don’t know real love is, and sex is not selfish act it’s selfless.. it’s not about you, it’s pleaser your wife.. this world doesn’t know what love is because they don’t know God.. if you knew God will know what love is but you don’t

[20yearsolder]

And you believe in a book that has been translated hundreds or thousands of times. Why are there different versions of the Bible? Why are there completely different religions? You are passing judgment because people don't do everything the way you think it should be done. You do what works for you

[karleeexoxoxo]

It’s not just the Bible I believe, it’s from past experience and bad decision I made and because I didint have relationship with God and I did whatever i wanted and they were consequences in my decisions, it doesn’t matter what religion you are, your decision will always have impact on you good or bad.. I was sexually active young and with that I had soul tie that last so many years this person I though was going to marry him but it didint it broke my heart it like death when that person me and because I have him my body for a person that wasn’t going to marry it left me with a soultie,, it doesn’t matter if you are in a loving relationship or not you don’t know if that’s the person you going to end up in the rest of your life and honestly didint want a wait till marriage but God my eyes and he show the truth sex is that how he created to be beautiful thing in a context of marriage for 2 people that are inlove and I don’t care what society it says because it’s all bull crap, god says is better then anything because thees no shame, there’e peace and more I don’t have to carry all that weight in my marriage I’m 26 im a virgin and I can’t wait to give them men everything of me and how I wait for him and that I honor God and most important I honor myself because as women we lost our respect

[20yearsolder]

I'm not a religious man, I've never been a religious man. I'm a good person. I do what is right. I don't need some fictitional character to influence what I do. Like I said you do what works for you But don't pass judgment on others because they're not like you. Sorry you had a bad past and made poor decisions. That's on you. I have no issue with your beliefs. Just don't try to shove them down others throats

[karleeexoxoxo]

I’m not shoving but how can you called yourself a good person, nobody is good, have you lied. Steal, murder and look at the women lustfully, commit adulterous, we have perfect God that’s perfect in all his ways and we all will be standing before him and he will judge us not over our good works but that we have relationship with because we only good through Jesus… this world is full of evil and sin that God had to sent his holy son to die for us so we can have eternal life.. because he loves us he loves you and me and he wants to us go to heaven so we can experience his goodnes but we need to humble ourself and stop acting prideful because nobody is good not even one

[20yearsolder]

Have you ever lied? Have you ever stolen? All you have to do is go ask your fictitional god for forgiveness. I'm fine with who I am. I don't have to live by some fake God's rules. Like I said do what makes you happy. Just don't judge other people that aren't like you. I'm done talking to you. You're never going to change my mind and obviously I'm not going to knock any sense into your head

[Summeroflove]

Don’t cast your pearls before swine. You’re obviously more intelligent then probably 90 percent conservatively on here. You can’t reason with people who are unreasonable.

[Summeroflove]

A creepy reprobate old man. I have seen your comments creeping on women all the time. You’re a dirty old man.

[Summeroflove]

EXACTLY FINALLY SOMEONE ON THIS SITE WITH COMMON SENSE!!! I agree with everything you just said

[Bricealan]

Probably for the reason, that waiting until marriage, would put the man or woman in a position of finding they were not sexually compatible with his/her spouse. People change ENOUGH in their interest in sex as the marriage progresses with children, in-laws et cetera, that if you are not sexually compatible BEFOE marriage, you could be in real trouble afterward.

[karleeexoxoxo]

That’s what society tells you and it’s all BS! sex changes everyday, it’s not going to be the same before bro. And if your basing your relationship on sex onlythen you seeing your relationship as a performance type of love the real love.. people have it all twisted.. that’s why men see women as objects not as real.. you want something your not ready for to have because you don’t know how to use it and sex is a gift but it needs to be use well it’s not something you can do whatever you want with, how don’t you know that when you have sex with somebody, it brings a bound and it doesn’t matter you are loving relationship or not sex clouds your judgment

[Summeroflove]

Society AKA the world. People only argue with common sense to make themselves feel better about their poor decisions in life.

[Summeroflove]

Yup. She’s right. A relationship should be about love. Sex comes later

[misogynistic_pig]

Virginity in marriage was successful when casual sex was hard to come by, that's why it was easier for men to get married and ensure sex for life, after the legalization of contraceptives and divorce, sex is cheaper and easier, since women are much more promiscuous, that's why men don't waste their money and time in marriage, only beta men get married nowadays.

In the modern Western context, marriage is a system of legalized prostitution whereby a man bribes a woman with food/drink, shelter, emotional security, job security, transportation service, an expensive ring, and a lavish wedding.

[Agape93]

Why would we? Would you buy a car without testing it first? Would you buy a house you've never been in?

[karleeexoxoxo]

That’s the problem, a lot of people look at sex As act, it’s not.. it’s emotional spiritual mental connection and people have it all backwards.. just because you have sexless marriage doesn’t mean your marriage is bad, it means you to have conversation and if you going to relationship base on if the sex is good or bad then you going to the wrong Reason and selfish reason because your heart is in the wrong, a lot of people they inlove with there boyfriend and girlfriend but the reality is you don’t love that person, you love how they make you feel in the bedroom, it’s sad but it’s the truth , people confused lust and love and that’s just reality… nobody know what true love is anymore.. they think is sex and that is just the mind that we have been thought by social media , Friends , tv shows and the list goes on

[Agape93]

There is no difference, sex is an act with emotion and spirituality coming secondary, but are often intertwined. But I don't think you have any tract to say people don't know what love is, because it doesn't fit your personal view of it.

[AviatorTom]

Why do you say "anymore"? Men and women have been having sex before marriage for centuries.

[andreasderjuengere]

I will not tell you that you are 'wrong'.

But why do YOU tell ME?

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I agree with you I want a woman who wants to wait for marriage

[TheSpaceGnome]

Actually sex was done long before people (or tetrapods in general) even existed.

Marriage is a human word for pair bonding, which many species did before humans even invented gods, and people used to pair bond and have kids at much younger ages.

Despite all this, there are actually people who will wait, but thats usually out of std and unplanned pregnancy fears, not because of superstition or wanting to wait.

Most people want to have lots of sex by the time they hit puberty, and are able to restrain themselves up to their late teens to early 20s while with someone (late 30s to 40s if not).

Demonizing sex is mainly the result of abrahamic cult worshippers, ie christians, jewish, islamics. Everyone else before, next to, and after those people, thinks sex is great.

[tfan1]

I was raised to wait till marriage for sexual intercourse. And I did. Also come to find out my wife was a virgin too. 👍🙂. We lost our virginity together on our wedding night. 👍🙂. I was 30 and she was 29.