Sexual Health
+1 y

Should men have a say in abortion?

What do you think? If you have any better arguments, just leave them down there! And if you don't wanna read them, just skip right to the comment section.

Argument for: A woman doesn’t want to have a baby. She is allowed to abort it without the fathers permission to do so. If she goes through with it however, and the father doesn’t want it, he is forced to pay child support. The argument for child support is that they both have the responsibility of the child they have brought up, and therefore he is responsible to pay if he leaves that other responsibility by not staying with the child. But a woman is allowed to leave her responsibility of caring for the baby yet not born. They both have equal responsibility, and it is illogical, and therefore men should have a say in abortion.

Argument against: A woman should determine whether she wants an abortion or not. It is her body, and she is the one who will go through labor, and birth, not the man. He doesn’t understand, or know what she is going through. She has the right to her own body, as we have until the day we die, and after that. A man cannot force a women to bear an unwanted child. Therefore a man should not have a say if he doesn’t want an abortion.
Should men have a say in abortion?
Should men have a say in abortion?
Yes
Vote A
Should men have a say in abortion?
No
Vote B
Should men have a say in abortion?
Can't decide
Vote C
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Girl Guy
2 2

Most Helpful Girls

  • I am in the situation at the moment. Been with my ex for nearly two years. He was the one who always started talks about family, future, kids etc which now know was his another BS talk. I always wanted to have kids and family and more than anything i wanted that with him. As soon as I got pregnant against all odds (using contraception, having fertility challenges in the first place, age) he started pushing with the abortion. I knew from very begging this was going to either make us stronger or break us. He made it very clear he wanted only me and the only way possible for us to stay together was to have an abortion (now I take it as he wanted only my body as my dreams didn't seem all that much to him after all). I chose my dreams, my values, my health and to cut him out of my life after he repeatedly turned up to demand I had an abortion and tired scary me with prospects of being a single mother and never be wanted by any other man due to having a child to someone else. He went as low as accusing me of cheating on him, which never happened and couldn't not have happened as I loved that POS wholeheartedly. So he had a lot say, that unfortunately didn't get him any closer to his desired outcome. Due to the dv situation there is a way to seek exempt from child support that won't affect your other benefits like family tax etc. To me this means - I won't ever have to deal with him again, my life is back to being mine and normal and my child is out of danger to be treated like that.

    • This will be your first kid?

    • @WriterAndPainter yes my very first and very much wanted child.

    • Well congratulations! My mom had me when I was 36 and I'm wild and outspoken. I also grew up without my dad and don't even care because she was such a good momma and still is.

  • "The argument for child support is that they both have the responsibility of the child they have brought up,"
    media.giphy.com/media/3oz8xLd9DJq2l2VFtu/giphy.gif

    Seriously that is the logical mistake people who think men should be able to opt out of child support are making.
    The reasoning for child support is that there is a child that needs to be taken care of. And the most obvious people are the biological parents. That's it. It's not about responsibility, it's about children being taken care of. Women cannot leave a baby that IS born anymore than men can. But until that baby is born there are obvious biological differences in men and women

    Men can't have a say in abortion. It's not possible. You can't have two people democracy. You can either give men all the power or women or.. well the state. Those are your options.
    People who think there is any other option are looking at things that happen after the baby is born. But that has nothing to do abortion. If there is a baby the time for having an abortion has already passed
    media.giphy.com/media/aVtdz7iNVPI1W/giphy.gif

  • If she knows he doesn't want a kid she should consider him signing his rights away so she can't come after him for child support. He should never pressure her into an abortion she doesn't want but she shouldn't pressure him into a kid he doesn't want you know? Alsk if he's up for keeping the kid but she wants to abort i feel she should just go through with it? As parents even to an unborn fetus you should do whats best for the baby because an abortion is so permanent but so is life. Life i feel though is the better option in either scenario as long as each partner can figure out what they want and talk about it civilizedly but i would personally never want to be forced to give birth if i didn't want to but i also wouldn't let anyone force me into an abortion so at the end of the day since the pregnancy occurs with my body i do haventhe ultimate aay which is just the reality. I feel people should have these discussions before sex anyways. You need to know who you are jumping into bed with.

  • Of course not. Is the calcium being leached from their bones? Are their pelvic muscles separating? Is their body changed forever? No. So men can sit this one out.

    And for those of you who will say "but I don't want kids!"

    As soon as it's easy for me to get an abortion and access birth control as it is for you file paperwork and buy condoms I will be right there with you for relinquishing paternal rights.

    • @BellePepper Woman rape men and keep their baby. So it is okay to rape men since he doesn't get to choose if baby is birthed or aborted?

    • What age do you live in? You must be one of the lost feminists who are stuck in the '60s. Birth control is readily accessible to all women. You have over 20 forms of birth control, plus morning after pills, plus RU-486, plus feminist legislation in your favor. Plus condoms have been proven to be the less effective type of BC compared to what you have. Plus it's much easier for you to request an abortion than for a man to receive paperwork. PLUS the man can't pass his paternal rights without having YOUR permission, as if YOU'RE his mother... What more do you want?

    • @ProjectBaby1K No it is not and the republicans are constantly trying to take access to both abortions and birth control away from us. I want to be able to determine MY choices for MY body. When all the women in my country can do that then I'll be happy to let you sign away whatever rights you want. I'll even support you and fight for your right to do so.

    • Show All

Most Helpful Guys

  • If men have no opinion in abortion then men will just become numb to the idea of if they are going to have a child or not.

    Really in the end its up to the mom/woman who is carying as even if we out law abortions we will just be going back to the age women just get illegal abortions.

    I personally think men dont really have a voice in the idea of abortion. And I think it should be legalized but it does go on your medical record if you choose to abort the baby and you will face the cost for the abortion. I'd say that there has to be a cost if we allow legal abortions we cannot allow what happened when birth control first started. Where women abuse the new capablity to not get pregnant or dramatically reduce the chance they do.

    Also if you want the father to stay I think society should give dads a break. As there isn't really a plus for guys to become a father from the guys perspecticve. Other than getting compliements here and there. And if your not your automatically a bad guy. I firmly believe more guys would stay if there was an actual plus to staying with the mom and child. And less of burden feel to be the father.

    • I am one of the few that still believes birth control is immoral.

  • If you're in a loving, stable relationship - which is the only time people should make babies in the first place - I don't really see the controversy of this question. If you love your boyfriend/husband very much, it seems natural to involve him in your thoughts, emotions and the decision-making process. But comparing abortion to child support as some people do is cynical and emotionally immature. The two are very different.

    • I read the question from a legal perspective. Obviously, the vast majority of people would agree that a good and decent man should be given the opportunity to take part in the discussion and to share his views... but legally, the decision has got to lie with the woman. If we give men the legal right to force a woman to remain pregnant, we are handing abusive men an incredibly powerful weapon that can and will tie their victims to them for life.

    • To clarify- I'm agreeing g with you. Just adding g to what you said.

    • @Sara413 Yes, I agree with you in legal terms too. There is a liberal female State Senator from Kentucky or Tennessee who proposed a bill in her state's government a few months ago to give girlfriends and wives the right to veto (a. k. a. forbid) their boyfriend's or husband's masturbating. She did this after the Republican majority tried to make a law to let husbands decide about their wife's abortion. Unsurprisingly, the conservatives went completely nuts and screamed themselves into a fit. What they didn't realize is that the female Senator was only trolling them. She wasn't actually serious about her law. However, she WAS serious about making people stop and think for a moment. Biologically speaking, there is no big difference between masturbation and early-term abortion. In both cases, you are killing tiny cells that perhaps might have become a human being one day. In fact, masturbation kills billions of them in one go. So if right-wingers believe that men should (cont.)

    • Show All

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

Related Questions

Girls, do you have sex drive?
I just want to get fucked! How to get a guy to approach you/notice you at a party?
Are you mentally ill or mentally healthy, and is it difficult or easy for you to orgasm during masturbation?
If a guy told you he could cum farther than he can pee, what would be your reaction?

What Girls & Guys Said

38 76

  • I went with "no". Of course from a moral standpoint, both biological parents should be involved in the decision-making about this pregnancy. Yet I have to go with "no" if we're talking about legislation.

    My reasoning is that if we're pro-choice in the first place and abortion is an actual option, then we cannot deprive the female of her rights. We can't reduce her to simply a vessel for a fetus. She has the ultimate power and choice over her own body. No one can take that away from her. No one can force her at gunpoint to do otherwise or be locked up, not even the biological father with the aid of government.

    That doesn't make me happy to say since I can imagine some tragic scenarios where the father-to-be wanted the child, but that's just a risk that comes with the territory. It should be accounted for with precaution and planning upfront.

    For the child to have a good chance of being born healthy, the pregnant female has to want the future child. She has to take care of her body during pregnancy. We can neither effectively nor practically force her to do that. If we recognize the burden she has and recognize her rights over her own body, then we have to allow her to be able to abort regardless of what anyone else wants of her.

    Again precaution and planning is the how we prevent this unfortunate dilemma in the first place. This shouldn't be such a big issue. If it is, we need more planning and precaution.

    • The way I see it is that we either recognize the female's rights over her own body or we don't. That's a pro-choice vs. pro-life issue, not an issue about whether the male should have a say. It's an issue about whether the female should have a say, since she alone carries this burden. If we recognize those rights, then we infringe upon then if the male can overrule her decision. He is then allowed to hold her at analogical gunpoint and say, "You must give birth or else," or, "You must abort or else." In the former case, again the mother has to nurture her body to ensure the well-being of the future child. Laws can't inspire pregnant females to do this. The biggest problem I see here is that we're actually looking towards laws to solve this problem. That suggests to me that there's a much bigger root problem in society involved here that needs to be tackle another way than at analogical gunpoint.

  • I voted no because what if a rapist got her pregnant, and makes her keep the baby? What if she is just not willing to have a child yet, and her boyfriend goes all psycho on her and makes her keep it? So many different ways that a man can overpower a woman even more with this. Also, some good can come out of it, but I can't see the good overpower the bad in this argument. Sorry.

    • In general speaking I thinks both the mother and the father should have a say. If the father wants to keep the child, it would be difficult for him to lose it. If the mother doesn't want to take care of the child, the father who wants it can take the responsibility. If no of the parents are able to take care of the child and aren't sure about abortion, adoption or foster family may be an option. I thinks it isn't fair that the child have to pay it's life because of another person's action. In rape cases I thinks adoption should be an option if possible if the mother doesn't want to keep the child. I'm also pro-life.

    • Using your logic, what if the guy isn't willing to have a kid yet, and her girlfriend goes all psycho and keeps it?

    • Good point. Maybe there should be something put into place about that, although I guess that is what the original idea was.

    • Show All

  • I thinks the father should also have a say when it comes to abortion. I thinks it's very heartbreaking if the mother doesn't want the child, but the father wants it and then she "kills" it. Since both parts have made it, both's votes matters. I'm pro-life in general speaking. But abortion is even worse if not both parts have a say and that the father who wants to keep the child have to witnesses the mother ending it's life. It's sad to lose your own child and it's even more difficult if there are somebody's fault. It would hurt if I lost somebody I loved due a disease, but it would be even harder to lose them if somebody killed them at will.

  • meh- they should but ultimately it up to the girl. It her body that will be affected not his, but it both of there future that going to be impacted so it all depends.

    • If the father wants to keep the child, but the mother wants to take a abortion, it would affect the father too. Losing a child you begins to love is very difficult too. Therefor I thinks both parts have a say. An abortion affects both of the parents.

    • @curiousnorway

    • @curiousnorway so do you think that the man should have to pay child support if she wants the child but he doesn't? because that's the only way to reach equality in the fact that men are being given the right to destroy women's bodies against their will

  • In the law making, no. In the woman actually having one, no. They are allowed to give their opinion, and feelings on the matter; however, the woman gets to decide ultimately if she wants to carry the pregnancy to term. If a man cannot say "I support you 100% in this, no matter what, abortion, or no abortion." then, honestly, I don't think that person is ready to be a romantic partner, much less a parent.

    I personally will never have sex with someone who disagrees with the idea of my having an abortion. Every person I have sex with, or even get into a relationship with, is told that if I do get pregnant, I will get an abortion - if they aren't okay with that, I don't have sex with them.

  • Of Course..
    Especially if he is the Daddy Here, dear.
    Nicely Done, hun. xx

  • Absolutely! I think if a women doesn't take some sort of anticipation and gets pregnant it's her fault. She should've known better and taking full control then all of a sudden seems wrong. I do think both party's have a say into this equally but I see many times where a girl lies she's on birth control and gets pregnant and aborts the baby without asking the guy what he wants. Nope, in my eyes that's really wrong.

    • childbirth leaves 10% of women with PTSD www.parentingscience.com/childbirth-trauma.html

      which is the same rate at which men get PTSD from combat: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2891773/

      When the man has to endure equal risks in pregnancy, he can have equal rights over deciding whether or not it continues.

    • @mistixs stop spamming, repeating something doesn't actually make it true.

    • @Kirah yeah, those damn scientific sources I provided definitely don't prove my point. you certainly proved me wrong with YOUR scientific sources that YOU'VE provided! /s

    • Show All

  • I say i dont wanna answer this again... even though it is the one of the cleanest descriptions I've seen... its just touchy for me being an "almost father"...
    i feel i may be biased.

  • Men have a right to voice their opinion but ultimately the decision is the woman's, because of the fact that the pregnancy is happening *in her body*, and not his. Just like she's not allowed to decide for him what medical treatment he's allowed/not allowed just because they're partners.

    • And men who want a baby and are against abortions; maybe you should clarify these things with your partner before having sex AND make sure you're on the same page. Instead of trying to force women who aren't ready to have a kid, to give birth.

  • Ultimately it is up to the woman to make the final decision on this matter... However although it takes two to tango and the child is half and half of each other, the male's opinion should at least be taken into consideration. Abortion be it for medical risks to the woman or the child risks not surviving pregnancy or birth, or because each didn't want or prepare for a child, doesn't matter as they are their own reasons not ours to throw opinions on. But it is the woman that has to carry and birth the child and it is the woman who holds all the risks, thus ultimately she has the final say.

    At least acknowledge your partners opinion on the matter and weigh it in your final decision.

    • @LesterJester What about a man that's raped by a woman? He didn't get a say in which woman got his seed. He should have the ultimate decision in which woman he wants to put his seed into if it's consented.

    • @tugg-A hypothetically speaking, in that case the woman would be charged with sexual assault and any offspring produce the victim would have no responsibility to support the child.

    • @LesterJester And if that raped man wants the baby, she should be forced to carry baby since she violated him. That way, victim is choosing.

    • Show All

  • That depends and explaining it will be longer than 1,000 words

    If u want me to write the explanation message me :) I will send it to u

    A logical breakdown of it and answers

    Emotional one

    Religious one

    And my own opinion.

    Then mix all up in one result and what I believe should be done :D

  • I wish that women would make the decision together with their partners but ultimately she is the one who has to carry the baby for 9 months and give birth to it. She is the only one who can do that so she has to decide whether she wants to go through that. If the father wanted to keep the child, it would be great if she delivered it and gave it to him and signed her rights over but that would be a lot to ask for her to go through for a child that she herself doesn't want to bring into the world. I also think if she had the baby and he didn't want it that he should sign his rights over and not be responsible to pay child support.

  • They should be part of the discussion when it's their potential child, but legally, no, the final decision has got to lie with the pregnant woman. It's her body. It's her life that will be the most deeply and irrevocably affected.

  • The man should have a say in regards to keeping the child, but definitely not in aborting the child just because they don't want to pay child support and have a baby mama to deal with. There are guys out there that are willing to step up to the plate and take responsibility, and there are also ladies out there that would rather take what they see as the easy way so they can still party and screw around and not have the duties of a child to tend to.

    • 59% of women who have abortions already have children. This leads me to think that women aren't trying to shirk parental duties (and par-taaaay) as much as they recognize an additional child might make it harder to raise the first child.

  • A say? Sure why not. The final decision? No. I don't care what your stake is in the matter. In the end it's it's not your body that has to go through the pregnancy or the abortion. Yeah it's not fair but neither is forcing a woman to keep or abort a baby against her will. In fact that is less fair because to her it's forcing physical distress on her and for some extreme psychological torture (yes men can face emotional pain on this matter to a great degree of course. Yet the fact is that it is worse for women and men are biologically incapable of understanding this. That isn't their fault obviously).

    And this should also be something people discuss before engaging in sexual activity. "Hey by the way if I ever get pregnant I'm having an abortion" or "Hey I don't believe in abortion so I get pregnant I'm having the baby" or "Hey I don't want kids" or "Hey I don't believe in abortion so if you get pregnant I'll want you to keep it ". You know... communicate.

    • This isn't to say men and women shouldn't be able to talk about this matter and state their opinions and feelings. But it should be noted that reproductive coercion is a form of abuse.

    • And I mean reproductive coercion regarding women AND men FYI. Yeah I see you getting ready to angrily type "What about the men?" Seriously hold your horses you... You know who you are! *stare*

  • Hmm, in a way. I don't think that he should have the ultimate decision, that should lie with the one who actually has to go through the pregnancy and the birth. If she doesn't want the baby, then he can say he doesn't approve but she can still do it. If he's the one that doesn't want the baby but she does, I think that she should still be able to have the baby, but he should be free of any responsibility to give time to raising the child and he shouldn't have to give any money towards the raising of the child.

  • I think the only instances where the man shouldn't have a say is rape or incest. If the woman was forced into the pregnancy, the decision should be hers alone. Same reasoning applies to incest. I don't believe her life should be changed forever because of a corrupt family member.

    Other than that, the man should be included in the decision. It shouldn't matter if he's the woman's friends with benefits, boyfriend, fiancé, or husband.

    • Rape is an extremely difficult crime to prove. Making an exemption for that just doesn't make sense logistically, and opens the door to serious abuses of the law.

    • @Sara413 I agree that's it hard to prove. In fact I've said many times that there need to be protections for the accused

  • Of cours they should have a say in it.. and man.. this site just depresses me. 44% of the women dont even think they should have any say in it? wow, pretty f*cked up. Would normally elaborate, but not much point anyway, insane world.

    • I think that 44% are looking at it from a legal perspective, not a moral one.

    • You probably should elaborate, because it sounds like you're saying, "The guy should be able to force a woman to maintain a pregnancy she doesn't want to maintain" which is a violation of human rights, and is pretty fucked up.

    • @Sara413 But its not a question of being legal or not. Simply if they should have a say in it. @sycoseo only if you wanna dramatize it and play with the extremes. "A say" is not force. Basic human right that as well to simply have a say on things. Im curious personally if the genders were reversed how people would think then. "How dare my boyfriend to kill my precious baby I want to love and cheerish so badly, and I dont even have any say in it, like I didn't do anything at all to bring it into this world". I can play that game too, although sadly, mine is ridiculously close to reality, wish it wasent. But fucked up again too if people can't even see it really.

    • Show All

  • C, I can easily say a man doesn't have the right to decide whether or not a man can force a woman to give up her organs and bodily autonomy to keep a baby, but I do wonder whether or not a man should have the fiscal burden for a baby. I'm open to arguments on either side and will look below for others arguments to see if any influence my position.

  • Yes but I think less than the women, maybe a 40/60 split, i. e. womens preference comes first

    • That's the same thing as not having a choice. You either require agreement on the father's part, or you dont.

    • @RedHood7 Nope, it really isn't, means if both are adamant bot views differ then the womens view should be the one that decides as she is the one that will be the one carrying the child, but if the man is adamant and the women is unsure...

    • @Bindos What about a man that's raped? He didn't have a say in which woman got his sperm.

    • Show All
  • Show More (94)

Latest Questions

I regret opening up the relationship. Where do I go from here?
Guys, Have you ever had your cock measured by a woman?
Guys, how does it feel when you finish inside of a girl?
Girls, is 6.4 inch L 5.6 inch G enough to satisfy girl?
Home >  Sexual Health  > Should men have a say in abortion?