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How to get over recent self made insecurity (warning 18+)?

Apologies in advance for the long post and adding another penis question on here.
Important details I'm average below the belt but good average. 3.5 soft and like 6 hard never had any complaints or worries previously. I'm a confident guy but get cocky and become a bit of a shit talker with alchole. Me and my friends about 2 months ago go to a jacuzzi kick back at a buddy house. There 7 people 3 hetero couples and 1 mutual female friend. Everyone drinking and having a good time. Someone suggest skinny dipping my buddy tries to kill the idea. I shit talk him saying he must be tiny mostly just immature guy humor. My girlfriend tries to shut me up but his girlfriend surprisly pushed the skinny dip idea and that feeds my ego. I win and we all get out to strip and his girlfriend rips his shorts off reaveal a giant softy that's about my size hard. everyone in shock and comments/jokes about it. This isn't a porno so we all just get back in the jacuzzi. Me and my girl sit across from him (original seats) and she starts laughing aparently dicks float and his head acting like a buoy and kinda just bouncing at the surface I admit it was a very funny view but not a good one for my confidence. Night goes on and regular convo continue a lot of dick and tit jokes but nothing bad happens. I did catch my girl glancing at it but that's normal I guess. I one point he did get hard and turns out it he has a porn size dick that both long and fat he apologized and tried to hide it. It was normal most guys got hard at least once that night there was 4 girls who were at least topless after all. My confidence has been shot tho. My girlfriend noticed that I'm having a harder time getting a boner and I can't watch porn anymore. Evertime I see a big one I think of him and thats weird af so yea. Now we're in quartined and we should be having crazy amounts of sex but my confidence is kinda holding me back and I'm suddenly insecure about my size. I would appreciate any advice on how to move past it
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  • Your girl seems totally fine with you average sized dick. You definitely have skills in the bedroom so don't start losing your confidence now. Your girlfriend is still 100% into you it's just yourself that's making you feel bad about the situation. As long as you know what you're doing and how to use your dick you can keep her happy. Also, fuck porn it's all fake anyway at least you know your girlfriends' reactions are real!

    • Yea that was true we were both surprised by my friend but I seem to care more then her

    • Yes exactly! Don't dwell on it.

    • Yea I guess I'll just try to get used to it

  • Penis size isn't the most important thing in the world and even if it was you're above average and have had no complaints. Also, many females dont give a damn how big a mans dick is as long as they know what they're doing and are willing to perform other sexual acts to make the woman climax. My suggestion to you on getting your confidence back is simply remind yourself that you're size isn't detrimental and is above average, also try to focus on the things that turn you on about your girlfriend during foreplay and sex. Her figure, her sounds, her expressions, the body language she gives off from the pleasure she's recieving. Seeing and hearing that you can satisfy your woman is bound to spike your self confidence. Good luck doll!

    • Thank you so much. I know that size isn't everything I don't know seeing he was so much bigger made me feel less manly I guess. I really like ur advice tho honestly ur one of the few that actually gave advice. I'll just focus on her and not my bits and if I can please her more that make me feel more manly

    • You're very welcome!

    • If u don't mind me asking. How would u feel if u were in my girlfriend shoes and saw what she did? I'm sorry if it's to weird but u express urself well and I don't know what she thinking

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  • tbh size isn't a big deal if its at least average. larger doesn't feel any better. What really matters is what you can do with what you have and how well you can please her. And what really matters is if you are good at oral because simple sex usually doesn't get the job done no matter what your size is

    • So if u saw a penis way bigger then ur boyfriend u woudnt care or be embarrassed that everyone could see ur smaller man?

    • no i feel like guys think size is a bigger deal but as a females perspective i think it doesn't mean he's better at sex. I mean if you were really micro small it might be embarrassing but not if its average. Id be more embarrassed that you were teasing tbh😂

    • Tbh she was mad at me for that brought it up and turns out she still kinda is

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  • It's the motion of the ocean and skills. You could have a footlong and it dont mean nothing if you dont know how to use it. Skill always beats size. Oral skills are always helpful too.

  • Honestly penis size doesn't matter if she's with u for quite some time she already saw it dont leave her hanging there is a reason she is with you that will over power anything you have in your pants and besides that also might be the reason she's with you maybe she likes your size and besides the size doesn't matter it's about the skills and knowing how to take the time to seduce a women and how you make her feel not what you bring to the table any girl can cum on there own it's the feeling we get that makes it memorable so dont be insecure

    • Yea I don't know tbh I'm still confident in my skills I just don't feel manly anymore. She used to call me big too and she hasn't since that day. I'm kinda glad tho because I would feel patronized and I think she senses that, so she may be being considerate. I just need to get my MOJO back I guess. Thanks for commenting I appreciate it

  • Tough love time:

    You did this to yourself. You hoped he'd have a small penis so you could get an ego boost. So when you discovered he's lugging a monster in his pants, your ego took a nosedive.

    The issue here isn't that you've been bested in the penis size department by your friend. The issue is you CARE about that in the first place.

    Stop comparing yourself to others, and go give your girl the dick she fell in love with 🤣

    • Lmao well nothing u said is wrong

  • I don't know maybe its just me but I wouldn't want a huge dick like that, I don't want it to hurt when he's slamming into me doggy style, so my boyfriend is probably same as u, 6-8 inches when hard, I don't know I haven't measured lol but 6 inches when hard is plenty for me, I don't know what the problem would be. I want him to be able to get himself all the way deep inside me, with a huge dick like that there would be less of me enjoying, and more of me fearing he's gonna tear me during sex. I never liked the HUGE porno dicks, its all fake and in my opinion the bigger the dick the more selfish they are in bed. for women, its not necessarily the size, its HOW they use it that makes the sex great, otherwise i can just use my vibrator. Just saying. Id happily take ur 6 inches hun lol

    • Haha my girlfriend told me the same thing. She said it's impressive but honestly I think it would just hurt me so no thank u. I guess porn has been feeding me a lie

    • Lol yea I wouldn't worry about it at all. Most women dont want a huge dick, despite popular belief, like I said 6 inches? Perfectly fine. Same thing with oral, I wanna be able to take my mans cock deep in my mouth and still have room for all the licking and moving my tongue around, with a 12 inch cock i can't deep throat, and if i were able to it wouldn't be enjoyable for me not being able to continue from puking. My bfs dick is like 7 inches hard, and i love it, it fits perfectly inside my mouth and pussy, but still big enough to do some damage lol u know?

    • And yea porn is all fake. Since I started having g sex with my boyfriend, I can't really even get off to porn anymore, I just close my eyes and he's right there with me lol, like once I had the real thing, porn was like 'wow, never realized how fake this was' lol

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  • not sure why that's a problem?

    Are you insecure about guys being taller than you or having bigger muscles?

    What about guys who are stronger.

    the same goes for penises. they come in different shapes and sizes.

    if she's satisfied with you why would it matter?

    • That was actually a great simplification of it tbh. I don't know I don't think that make me feel 100% better better I definitely do feel better like relieved a bit. Thank u

  • Lmao, I understand how you feel. Your just gonna have to get over it and find other qualities in yourself to take pride in. Honestly don’t be afraid to laugh at yourself 🤷🏽‍♀️ . Your girl isn’t complaining so what? 😌

    • That's very true

  • Hmm 🤔 I need to think on it before response

    • Haha well I would really appreciate a response once u think about

    • Any thoughts? 😂

    • Still pondering 🤔

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  • Honestly size doesn't matter. Have fucked some well hung guys and very average guys. I've found the average guy is a lot better at fucking than a well hung guy and isn't as painful. Especially if the girl is tiny

    • Would u be embarrassed in this situation if everyone saw ur boyfriend penis next to one almost twice it's size?

    • Nope. As long as the guy can keep pleasing me

    • Aww awesome thank u so much

  • That’s why you shouldn’t have parties like that

    • But I don't know it wasn't super sexual and I know in some parts of the word nude beaches and suanas are normal for family and friends so thought it be fine

    • It is not fine tho. Some things should remain as secrets

  • Get over it. Your size is adequate to please your girlfriend, and that is all that matters

  • I don't do stuff like that , but it is a reason so many people don't stay together.

  • Is this a question or your first novel

    • I don't know maybe both

  • Okay I'll tackle this question. I think the world is insane and young people like yourself have been exposed to way too much hypersexualised imagery and pornography. It's not normal to be in the situation you described and your lifestyle sounds bizarre. At 22, you should be focusing on better things. Why all this promiscuity? It actually ruins your sex life. I don't advocate for sex outside marriage at all but if you must, just focus on you and your girlfriend. I also recommend not watching pornography and fasting from sex for as long as you can. As a side note, classy girls don't care about the size of your d*ck. It's your personality that matters.

    • Well we just skinny dipped no one was having sex but yea I guess me not watching porn anymore will be a benefit ateast

  • First of all.. simply as your girlfriend.. are you happy with my dick? .. she is with you so you can't be that bad.. I'm about the same size soft and hard but did you know the average is around that... Not many men have a larger dick.

    • Yea I did ask and she assured me that she likes my size and even apologized for staring at it. She did say it was my fault tho for talking shit. I guess she had heard in girl talk that he was very large so that's why she was trying to so to stop me from looking stupid but I didn't listen. Still it kinda hurt when I found out he the biggest she seen and when she assured me she was like I woudnt want to try that she think it would hurt. I don't know it's stupid it just pride I guess. He definitely got bigger haha I would guess he at least 8 hard I don't know but yea it was huge. I used the same logic and now that like 90% of people are very similar to me I didn't expect my friend to be in like 1%. My fault tho ur right I gotta focus on how nothing changed and I can still satisfy my girl

  • This question hits close to home lol very relatable...
    Its a hard situation though... both sizes feel good... both can hurt too lol hate to say it but the person they are attached to matters greatly... lol who cares if its big if all they do is jack hammer you like a rabbit learning the ropes...
    On the flip side no girl wants to be thought of as loose...
    I'm an A cup so I totally get it but when it comes to penises its usually the person that gets us aroused lol

    • Oh yea so u can relate because I'm sure u have friends with bigger boobs then u

    • Almost everyone I meet does... it use to sting more often when I was managing a womens clothing store... women are just downright bitches sometimes lol

    • Yea girls have it rougher in that sense. They can't hide their size. At least with guys it's usually a secret. I can defentily tell my buddy girlfriend was enjoying showing his size tho and seeing the difference between us. That did sting but at the same time it was my fault

  • But if you girlfriend stay cool with that, you don't need to worry

  • A girl likes what she likes.

    • Would u like the bigger size?

    • Honestly as long as said penis is attached to a decent person I could not care less

    • Oh awesome thank u

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