I regret opening up the relationship. Where do I go from here?

[Anonymous]

I regret deciding to switch up things in my sex life. I told my girlfriend of 5 years that I’m okay if she fucks another guy. She ended up telling me that she had sex with an old friend of hers the other day & he filmed it in his car. She can tell that I’m upset by everything and I feel like she was trying to tell things that I want to hear to reassure her about everything. I feel so conflicted and sickened by it.

The big thing that is fucking with my mind is her behavior. She brings up the experience out of the blue & talk about it in complete detail on what went down like she’s reminiscing about it. It doesn’t turn me on or anything. I feel uncomfortable and insecure about myself. She showed more excitement talking about it while also being more sexually interested in me. She gave me a hall pass to sleep with another girl to be even. A part of me feels like she feels guilty and try to appease me by doing things she claims she would never do. I can’t blame nobody, but myself for all of this. How do I go about this?

[DaveJord]

Sounds like she is emotionally manipulating you and she is winning. Sounds like the whole it okay to fuck other guys, thing might not have been your idea from the start... because this woman sounds really good at manipulations. The best manipulators can get you to come up with things on your own, as if it was your own idea... when in reality they planted the idea seed in you and put some water on it.

These types choose their victims very wisely, because they know the types that are easy to manipulate and fuck with emotionally to get them to do what they want.

Dude you got played... she cheated on you... got you to say it was okay, before you found out that she cheated... then starts making you jealous by going into detail about how she cheated on you... then come off as if it is sexy to her, so you don't dump her, because she likes the power her sexuality gives her over losers like you.

So, I know no nice way to say this to you, but its best to hear it straight out like a Band-Aid being torn off...

YOU GOT PLAYED!!!

[Finchie40]

You dug your own grave on that one man , you gave her an inch and she went for it , and sadly you really can’t be upset with her because you basically told her it was ok to do , in her mind she was thinking maybe by her screwing another guy would turn you on so she said fuck it cuz she is probably thinking you are screwing other girls as well, You never tell a girl you value that it’s ok for her to fuck other guys period , If a girl tells me it’s ok for me to fuck other girls, that right there tells me she wants to fuck other guys as well that she truly doesn’t value me , she only likes the convenience of me , so in turn I would say Do you want to fuck other guys? And if she says No then you don’t go fuck other girls’ period , if she says Yes , then kick her to the curb where she belongs. , So by you telling her it”s ok to fuck other guys. You just dug your own grave my man, You can either suck it up and stay with her and tell her the truth that you made a mistake or you can end it with her knowing she already got fucked by another guy , but again you honestly can’t be upset at her, it was your dumb decision

[Nikki1989]

You should have thought this through first. You gave her the green-light, now you have to live with it.

[EricSummer]

She is sexually interested in you when talking about her experience. That's reassuring and ut could be a lot worse.

Tell her how you feel. Hand back your free ticket to her and do not have sex with a different woman. Agree that from now on it's just going to be the two of you again.

And then seal the deal with some hot sex.

[RobT312]

I guess my first question is, why did you do that? Some guys get aroused by that for example.
if you changed your mind, then tell her exactly how you feel. Admit to making a mistake if you don’t want an open relationship

[lightbulb27]

congratultions, you are a another normal human stuck in a messed up society.

There's reasons why ou felt bored and why this doesn't feel good. you have this huge cranium... time to use it. See a therapist/read books/watch videos to determine

* Why you felt it was a good idea to let your woman screw other guys. That is beyond stupid, so you need to think. You can save yourself $1000 by using your brain

* Why you listened to and followed societies standards

* Why you were bored and how to heal your inner self so you are not a dopamine "me me me" phone, sex, netflix and other distraction... addict!

time to go to church and re-establish some standards.

[MementoMori777]

I don't know what to tell you, it's why I don't agree with all that open relationship crap or anything else that's in that area, how the Bible recommends love and a relationship is why I follow it, it's healthy, this was a dumb mistake to make because you gave her the permission to have sex with others and now you are in this unhealthy triangle, I'd say either tell her you change your mind about the open stuff and you want to close the relationship again or just break it off completely, which personally even tho it's not completely her fault, for your mental health you should break it off completely and start with a new girl at some point but make better decisions in general.

[In_Trance]

live and learn

[driven159]

so then get over it and move on

[Anonymous]

This is to be expected when a relationship gets opened up. These types of practices rarely ever go according to plan and yes she has already moved on from you.

[Anonymous]

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

[MementoMori777]

Honestly smh