Sexual Relationships
+1 y

My friend said guys might have a fetish for my race?

Is she trying to put me down on purpose? I’m mixed race, and my friend constantly brings it up. She said to me “aren’t you scared some guys might only like you for your race?” And she was debating whether or not my boyfriend just likes me because of my ethnicity. She also told me that “someone else” said my boyfriend must be really into “ethnic” girls. She brings up what they said constantly. Why does she say all this? Are her comments rude?
Updates:
+1 y
I’m half Asian and half white
0 1

Superb Opinion

  • I am sure you can find a guy who has a fetish for crooked toenails if you try hard enough.

    That said I find it better to not assume bad and statistically unlikely things about partners. Odds are he does not. Now he very well might like how your skin and his look next to each other or something, but I'd insist that merely liking something isn't fetishizing it. I can like that someone has curly hair without it being weird. It gets weird when I start foxing her hair as she sleeps or threaten to break up if she straightens it.

    If he isn't doing anything that makes you question him, don't buy into your friends words too much. Hear them out. Consider them and if they do not make a lot of sense disregard them.

    • Thanks , I totally agree. I still think it’s rude to ask someone else that though. My boyfriend doesn’t have a fetish for Asians so what she said doesn’t hurt me, but it still surprised me to hear those comments coming from her especially with reference to guys in general. she basically said guys are attracted to me because they have a fetish.

    • It is rude, well assuming she isn't correct of course in which case it is just being helpful. It doesn't seem like the case though. Makes one wonder why she feels the need to put you down. Jealousy? Recently rejected? There's bound to be something.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Sadly that's true. Despite what you don't want to hear, race and ethnicity have always been a deciding factor concerned about who will be attractive to you or not. That doesn't mean that they love you. And me that they want something out of you. By you being half Asian, they're definitely going to be interested in that. People that is considered mixed-race like myself is always going to be considered an exotic thing in a trend no matter where you go. Because that is part of the world agenda in the first place. Trust me as I say, it is most definitely a fetish thing. The thing is is that you may know the person little bit more better than your friend. So the only thing you can do is respect your friend's opinion, and Just Be watchful of the type of person you are with. If it's showing proving a did something wrong, you decide if you want to be stuck with that.

    • At the end of the day, love you for you. Not your ethnicity or whatever else you want to put as a physical labor. They are part of you, but they are not the entirety of you. As long as to you with feel the same way, then all you can do is just keep what she says in mind. Like I said it is sadly the reality. But it may be different from place to place. But in other homogeneous countries it is definitely a deciding factor. Or what when was the call being race conscience. So I'm sorry to tell you I had seen such men like that and I had been approached by such men like that always asking me what am I mixed of. Both by men and women.

  • Some people are into certain races others not. I think her comments are out of line. That isn’t something I would say to someone without knowing for sure. I would keep it to myself even if I thought that. What matters is do you like/love him? That’s the only question you need to answer.

    • Yes I really like him, and he really likes me. It just feels unnecessary that she always brings up my race. Thanks girl. Xx

    • That is definitely unnecessary. And you are welcome. Sounds like you have a great thing going. Don’t worry what others say 😘

    • Thank you xxx

    • Show All

Most Helpful Guy

  • She is way to hung up on race, dont want to call her a racist but when she's making it all about race what would you call it?

    She ignoring and dismissing your white half and treating you like you are 100% Asian, makes me think she'd only be happy if you dated Asian, but to me it would be weird if you and some Asian guy only dated each other just cause you are both Asian or partually Asian.

    That or she has some other issue like 1 maybe she's insecure and lowkey jealous a out how many dates you get and is clai. ing you only get guys cause of your race or 2, she jealous or your mixed race like she dosent like her own race.

    I highly doubt every guy who dates you is only doing it cause you "look Asian", I think she is projecting her own insecurity and she needs to address and work on it.

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What Girls & Guys Said

5 17

  • Are you Asian? Far east Asian like Pacific Asian?

  • It may be a sort of compliment that she thinks you are beautiful.

  • It's not a fetish. It is visual appreciation. So is she Maggie Q

    My friend said guys might have a fetish for my race?

    And her Moon Bloodgood.

    My friend said guys might have a fetish for my race?

    They just look good, warm and comfortable.

    • Yep and Kristin kreuk

  • No

    seriously think how sad a life that would be, fetish for whasian porn. Think how little there is. How unlikely it would be for someone to have not an Asian fetish based on stereotypes for Asian women, but specifically a fetish for half Asian women.

    I've know a bunch of half Asian young people and some of them are pretty good looking but I think having a fetish requires stereotyping and that's much more likely going to be about full Asian women (or white women).

    you might fall into the general "exotic" category but that's not a fetish. That's the standard human desire for things that are similar to what we're used to with an interesting twist.

  • She's rude and jealous

  • She should mind their own business. If your boyfriend treats you well that's all that matters.

  • I have a friend who only dates Asian girls but as long as the chemistry / mutual attraction is there that's no problem. When he dates a girl it is because she is both Asian and someone he likes. No two situations are the same.

  • So I dated a girl who was black and of course it became the joke that I liked black girls and that I had an ethnic taste but one of my biggest fears was that it was just a fetish. Thankfully I now know it was not. But back then it freaked me out. Because I did not want to be that guy who was only looking for an ethnic treat. I found that the difference was in how I treated her. I was totally fine with helping do chores or helping her run errands or even encouraging her to go spend time with her friends or her family. It wasn’t just about her skin or her body or my desire for her. Use your knowledge of him to judge for yourself.
    Your friend was totally out of line but I do think that she has your interest at hart. It is weird when you think that you have to treat someone differently then others. I think she might just have some of this racial society stuck in her head.

    • Thanks, This is true but she’s never said anything like this to me at the beginning of our friendship, so it just feels like she’s trying to dig at me.

    • Hmm! That sucks for sure! I wonder if maybe she is just trying to drive a wedge between you and him. Maybe she likes him too.

  • I can confirm that Asian mixes typically produces and extremely attractive female. As long as a guy u like approaches u and gives u the opportunity to show off ur personality to him, why the fuck does it matter what brought him in? Fuck ur friend! Nothing is wrong with being particularly attractive or being what a man desires. This is just another perfect example of women OVERTHINKING.

  • Your friend is cringe

  • It sounds like she's not the best friend to have.
    I'd like to add that there are people out there that find mixed race being hot 🔥 (I'm one of them).
    Keep in mind that Norwegians seem liberal on the surface but deep down they are very proud of their origin. I have a coworker that speaks openly about how he hates some other races even though his wife is Asian. I am not native Norwegian myself but of Nordic origin and I also experience same as you do.

    • Thanks. God your coworker sounds awful 😂 it’s my mum who’s Norwegian but luckily I’ve never experienced this from her or her family. My friend is British (we live in the UK which is very multicultural) so I don’t understand why she’d have that mindset though.

  • My daughter is mixed race, I asked her recent what she says to men who enquire about her race and she tells them to get over it. She is tall and beautiful and is engaged to be married to a white man.

  • She is trying to put you down. I think she is actually jealous of you. I date women that aren't my race quite a bit. I like mixed race women. Those women are who I am attracted to first.

  • I guess its possible. Seems there is a fetish for everything. Her comments make it seem like she has the fetish.. lol can't let the possibility of someone just having a fetish stop you from living. Chances are i think someone will be into you for you and not your race.

  • Lots of guys like mixed race girls because of culture

  • I think your female friend is very jealous of you.

  • Your friend is a hater. Be careful around her.

  • Jealous maybe

  • Most white guys have an Asian girl fetish. Many of my guy friends are like Once you go Asian yk..

  • You should be flattered

  • Show More (2)

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