Because that is the actually term. God created us and sex. Sex is not about you. It's about pleasing him. In his eyes, sex is a marriage, and he designed marriage to be ALL. ABOUT. SEX. Loving the idea of sex is one thing. But abusing sex is another.
"Why call people things like "slut", "whore" or "fuckboy" when they are enjoying their lives?" You mean enjoying HURTING other people besides themselves. People doesn't see the emotional, psychological and spiritual damage premarital sex cause on us and other people. I've seen people who have meaningless sex, and I see the hurt, the pain, the suffering, the abuse. I see girls who wanted to kill themselves. I've seen guys heartbroken because he thought the girl loved him, so he gave up his virginity for her. Or what he/she thought it was them giving it up for 'love'. People who hookup are BROKEN people with potentionally of mental illness.
It's not all just about disease. But it shows you how they treat people, threat sex and think about life. People like that are DANGEROUS. Period. Especially for women. And these are the side effects of premarital sex.
WOMEN:
{In a Relationship after 1st time premarital sex}
-Disconnect of Reality <--- which often happens after a breakup
-Increased risk of Mental Illness than males [self-harm, suicide, etc]
-Loss of 'Glow' on their skin and contenance. They tend to look pale.
-Change in Behavior {1st signs of mental, emotional and psychological abuse in a relationship}
-Secretive, unless they choose to overshare their relationship
[Breakup]
-Feeling of Lost
-Feelings of Guilt
-Feelings of Failure
-Feelings of Abandonment
Taken for the worse:
-Lack of Trust: Distrust of all MEN. They think all men are evil. Grows to bitterness and resentment
-Dressing more sexual to attract men
-Unfaithfulness: Develop a tendency that sex is just sex and it's meaningless. This transfers into marriages and often leads to adultary and divorces. #1 cause for multiple divorces and remarriages in a person's life. Since most times they don't want to indore that responsibility they try to remedy it by having ONS and friends with benefits [Hookups].
-Develop a Sexual Disorder/Nymphomania/Loss of Libido
-No Attachment: This isn't just about sex. But lack of attachment to nearly everything in their lives. It's not that they hate commitment. They FEAR IT. They fear that people will see who they REALLY are, and what they have BECOME.
And if you add personality types into, it can get worse for some men or women.
How certain men handle it and get into hookups is because of these reasons: -He was sexually active for the first time with a girl and got betrayed. -He saw his parents or close friends marriages are failing, so he doesn't see 'relationships, love and marriage' as important. -He doesn't know how to properly treat a girl/woman -He just likes hurting people. He thinks only about himself and is sexually weak. -He is so sexually weak, he can't control his problems. That person is a sex addict. And or have a mental illness that needs to be corrected and fixed. But is often neglected in that manner. -Every sexual relationship he get's into always ends up emotionally draining him. He doesn't see the need to work on the relationship anymore. So why is the hookup culture is Wrong?: 1. It makes people selfish. 2. It's a coward's way and or commitment phobic people's of living. 3. They're Immature in general. 4. They have no desire to change. 5. They won't compromise for the right reasons.
6. They're a bad example for other people in society and young children. Children learn and mimic everything that an adult does. 7. It destroy's the true purpose of Sex. It demeans it and turns what God made as pure into evil. 8. It can promote again, mental illness: depression, making them victimized or make somebody else their victim. 9. Old habits 'DON'T' die hard. They can become OBSESSED with sex, and it again, ties into mental illness, and god forbid may make a person want to turn or become a rapist. Especially if they already have a high sex drive and lack self control. 10. Becomes Porn Addicts. 11. Everything revolves around them. Your just in their world. Narcacissm. 12. They want to 'try to forget' their first sex partner, thinking they can get rid of the painful memories. This always backfires, since God created sex, he designed sex to bind people's souls and become one with another. Becoming one not just in body and spirit, but also in mind. You become what that person IS.
Their GOOD as well as their EVIL. As they too become you with your GOOD and also your EVIL. Who WANTS a person who is like that and is a threat to your life? Literally. A threat to your sanity. A threat to your relationship, A threat to your marriage, and your actually Life? Religion has 0 to do with it. God is not about organized religion. He can care LESS about it. He cares about what we DO. Because your not just hurting yourself or other people. Your hurting HIM. We are a part of God and in his image. When I think about it with people. It hurts me as a human being because i love humanity despite the sinful nature of it and not just myself. I hate it because it hurts me to see others hurt and hurting themselves. People who toss themselves away and abuse their body for sexual pleassure truly don't know what they do. Until its far too late. People who take enjoyment of that are considered wicked and evil for that reason. Your stoping a person and yourself form truly ever having great
This can really go so many ways. So, lets take it step by step.
Many times these names come from angry men and women that didn't get their way. Other times, the said person being called those names actually deserve it.
For example, "slut" was originally a messy person, and that turned into women being sexually promiscuous. Why does it have to be a woman? Well, because back in the day a woman was strongly respected/wanted when her virginity was intact. So, when a woman actually went out and had a 'good time', she was considered "slutty" a generalization for single women. When those single women start having too much fun, just so happens, with a married man... she is then considered a "homewrecking whore". When a woman is married and chooses to cheat, she is then looked at like a "cheater/whore/slut" or whatever word colors your fancy. Even when the man has just as much guilt in the problem, which brings me to a man being a "Fuckboy". They get this name whether they are single or married. When you are a single fuckboy, it means that you have basically used a woman for sexual purpose while leading her on. If you cheat while you're married, you're considered a fuckboy, too.
Thats is whats wrong with hookup culture. I think a simple way to stop it from going so far is if girls just went back to finding a date normally and in person... why? because this would in turn have to make the guy work harder to date them, etc etc.
Thought fuckboy was same as boy toy not using women, but used by the women solely for the benefit of physical pleasure then send him on his way?
@i_am_me_you_see nope. Fuck boy means that he used the girl, and then threw her away. Or cheated on his significant other.
Learn something new all the time..
I think it’s because people who are a part of the hookup culture tend to hurt people with their behavior. Fuckboys typically “hump and dump,” and it’s usually done under a pretense of having feelings for the other person. Then there’s the whole ghosting thing, and that’s just disrespectful. But, if the two consenting adults go into it with the understanding that it’s just sex, then I don’t see anything wrong with it, it’s just a societal standard to settle down, get married and raise children, which has been upheld for centuries. When someone breaks any standard, it’s bound to ruffle a few feathers
Totally agree with you. I dont want to get into details but Im also judged for mnnot having a boyfriend or date and that how come and that im running late to start a family like everyone else do, to settle get married and form a family I mean I had that the worse luck in my life inthe love deparment, Im 46 and never in my life have had a boyfriend or even dated formally or even informally with guys, guys never approache me or ask me out many years ago and as I age it gets more difficult to really find a guy who wants to settle at so late in our life much less have kids so old. So I had been single my whole whole life, dont know what if feels to be in a relationship or even a causal one. Then again people kind of criticize me that I have to get married and find company for when I get older. Maybe if my lifei were different back then I had boyfriend or date I could had married many years ago and form a family but it never happen. Now I dont want to bbe married or have kids, and yes Im a virgin but I
But at this time in my life I think I will never experience that sexual part of my life that everyone at least experience once in their life or they experience at some point being in a relationship or married etc etc Some people say im too old already and guys at my age whoa re still single they dont want relationships either they are just looking to get laid and hook ups And people ask me Dont you want to find a good man in your life, marry? Is not right for u to be out there and fool around with guys, you are a lady! and you should have respect for yourself
As long as both parties are fine with it and being safe then thats their decision what happens with it and really is no one elses business
Actually it is a bit complicated to understand and let take it based on chronogical order.
A girl is in teenage world. she is 15. Hormones are raging like fire. The brain does not really understand what right or wrong at that point and get bullshit from tv and movies to be real and right things to do, so she start to do it. Having fun is just the sweet lie to it aka the Icing on the cake. Inside her emotion are being destroyed, the subconcious mind start to develop reason about what she is doing. Time keeps going now, she found that she is starting to attract to the guy she just have hookup or feel like her soul is being violated. After while emptyiness start to cope in.
Pause...
When someone have sex, no matter hookup or not, a chemical called oxytocine is released in the body and it is job is to create connection with the person. The hornmones is released , the brain now have to ignore it, but the reward system is waiting for the brain to give the green flag on receiving that chemical , but since it is ignored, the reward system never kick in, dopamine is never released, so the person feel not satistied aka feel empty.
Continue...
All these process takes years like 10 years maybe before she realise that it was actually wrong, as her mind is now completeled grown up and wired up. She is 25-30 now and what seems to be fun and good when being 15 proves actually to be not right. Just like the way you realise you have diabetes. You do not get it the next day after consuming sweets, but gradually and when you discovered it is too late.
Why it is qualified as "slut", because when a slut does it, she does not feel any emotional pleasure and she is acting for money aka a weakness.
Hookup culture at the end she will feel empty as no emotional pleasure is present and she is acting under implusion of her hormnones or desire aka a weakness.
What seems to be enjoying when she was 15- 25, proves to be not enjoying on the long run when she is 25 and upward.
Hookup aka the act of having many sex partner bring comparison in the picture. As a saying " The grass is always greener in the other side", we tend to go and look for better when the real thing is not to go and find more but " DO WITH WHAT YOU HAVE".
But sadly values like these are missing in todays society and relationship will always suffer as we are able to compare and judge something that we should not be comparing.
that is the reason... so now whether women reading that, like it or not , it is the tru
I think we keep blaming society but I think societies just being used as a scape goat here. Just recently I watched my fraternity brother and one of the most sexually open girls I know start up a friends with benefits situation. Neither one of them want to be in a relationship but they both caught feels. I watched her accidentally call him the wrong name which made him fake anger jokingly to mask his sadness. Then shortly after he called her a friend which clearly bothered her. I know this is anecdotal but my point is human beings to a degree are still machines. If I inject the right chemicals into your body your reactions are pretty predictable. And although everyone wants to act like we’ve unshackled ourself from our anamilistic nature, as a man who studied sex and relationships extensively while getting his biology degree, I wholeheartedly believe our ideals have outpaced our biology. Your emotions aren’t logical and can’t always be explained away. Which means that fucking, the number one influencer of pair bonding, is bound to cause emotional reactions. Meaning people are going to get hurt by it. So many are going to fight against it. Unfortunately because many don’t have a way to talk about it clearly it manifest itself in the form of name calling, shaming, and blaming. At the end of the day it’s just another weird quirk of life you’re just gonna have to deal with. There will always be proud sluts and equally proud slut-shamers.
Thanks for this answer
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!This opinion may be biased, but I feel the shaming is done mostly by religious sorts. Especially religions which talk about “bodies are sacred” or “your body is promised to your spouse”. That tells people that any sexual act they choose to do is an act of adultery. Even if they’re unmarried. I grew up in the Christian faith & people legit think this way. Even me kissing someone who I had no intentions of marrying was seen as sinful. Masturbating even was seen as cheating on your future spouse & tainting the body that the Lord “gifted” you.
Now being secular about my beliefs, all of that kind of speech sounds so toxic thinking back on it being said to me. Especially when it was said to me before I was even experiencing sexual feelings! It’s so inappropriate for pastor to preach to little children about how their bodies don’t belong to them. It was more than a little creepy to have strangers tell me who I should allow to touch me.
Yeah, I'm gonna go with biased opinion. I know plenty of people that aren't religious that also aren't into hooking up. Not saying that some religious people don't go the extreme, but it's not looked down on by just them.
That’s why I said “mostly done” instead of “all act this way”. I can only speak from my personal experience being shamed for being promiscuous. Many people told me: “I’ll pray for you.” after calling me a whore. It’s probably because I live in Tennessee though. Here in the south, if you’re not reading the Bible, you’re the enemy. Other than that, I’ve only had butthurt men slut-shame me.
Historically society looked down upon people randomly hooking up, because it led to children whose parents lived in separate homes, which was very bad for the child's development and success in life. Often these children ended up in an orphanage or worse.
It was also bad because it led to the spread of STDs, which were a pox on society. Given that, ancient rules against hooking up made sense.
Also related, many ancient cultures valued self-control, and hooking up with people you thought were hot, despite the risks, is the opposite of self-control.
Today, many of those things no longer apply, due to the advent of modern healthcare and birth control. However, much of society retains its ancient restriction against random hookups.
One modern reason not to engage in random hookups is that some people have found that randomly hooking up was psychologically damaging to themselves. This has been confirmed by a few limited scientific studies, though psychology still needs to study the topic of casual sex further. The most recent study I could find said that 50% of women regret casual hookups, and that hookups for them led to feelings of low self-worth and cases of clinical depression. In the same study, only 26% of women reported feeling positively about a casual hookup. Men were interestingly the opposite, feeling better after a casual hookup.
www.theguardian.com/.../casual-sex-one-night-stand-self-esteem-psychological-distress
So the topic still needs to be studied, but the evidence thus far suggests that hookup culture is not mentally healthy for people, and specifically women.
I haven't read any other responses to this question before I wrote this. So I've no idea if I'm just repeating someone but what's wrong with hooking up is jealousy and societal Norms. If you want to go and have sex with 10 guys in one day. Or vice versa go for it. You do you. The problem is, men have a bad habit if feeling like even in a casual sense women are their property, so they mustn't do things that cross that boundary. Now if you find a guy who doesn't think that and let's you do as you please. You'll find women also have a bad habit of thinking women so sleep around are lower than they are. Because sleeping around is apparently dirty and frowned upon. But ONLY if the women is sleeping around. If a guy does this? He's a hero. This is where the jealousy comes in, men *usually* aren't jealous of one another because of sexual habits. Women seem to think that sexual habits should be restricted to one man or women else it's disgusting and bad. That's just on a gender scale. In a society based world where everyone just on band wagons let's face it. Sleeping around got a bad habit because of prostitution. Filthy people ridden with whatever back however many tens of years ago selling their body and passing on many many diseases of varying seriousness. So all of that combined. You end up with a very toxic and closed minded outlook on having casual sex. We won talk about the drilling into out brain all throughout childhood that you should pick a life partner and all that shit either. It also contributes.
Is when they don't agree with that type of actions
Not caring what other people might think of you is the greatest freedom you could ever grant yourself. It is much easier said than done. It requires a courage and discipline that most of us lack. We resent those that are truly free spirits because we are jealous of their ability to detach and throw off the yoke created by all of politicaly and socially correct norms we collectively burden ourselves with.
It's easy to say I don't care if random people think I am a slut. But ask yourself, do you care what other people think about how you dress on a regular daily basis? Do you care what other people think if you feel like singing the lyrics to your favorite song in the grocery store aisles?
It takes vigilance, serious mental tenacity (or enduring enough lifelong suffering) to ignore the urge to wonder or care if you are being judged.
... giving a f#@* out for free or just for people's opinions, gets really expensive in a spiritual sense. Keep a hold of them f#@*s and you'll be instantly rich! As for me? I'm fresh out... of f#@*s to give.
The general disapproval is probably due to the existence of STDs so people who are afraid of such things would naturally consider behavior which may lead to the development of disease to be very unappealing.
I don’t know why people make others feel bad just because their choices differ. Personally I treat my body with care I only share it with people I love. But that’s just me. Others treat theirs like a bag of chips. Pass it around the party everyone has their hands in it. But the chips are still good.
Nothing wrong with hooking up as long as you're using common sense. I. e. don't meet up with anyone if you think they're sketchy, use a condom to protect from STDs and the pill for that extra layer of protection against pregnancies. Also don't lead the person on and think there's more to it than just sex if that's what they're looking for.
Excellent!
nothing is wrong, provided each knows its just sex. no miss givings.
There’s nothing wrong with it... provided that everyone is up front about what they want.
What I believe people get annoyed with is that many times one party is looking for a relationship, and the other just wants to hook up. The misunderstanding causes hurt feelings, etc. etc.
Do your thing
Whatever floats ypur boat.
I don't really care as long as someone who does indulges in hookups shames me, for not wanting to be with someone who hooks up.
Abortions and STDs for starters.
No one is telling you can't fuck 10's of 1000s of people, without valuing them as a person. Just don't expect people to not judge you. You can't enforce what other people think of you.
As long as I was having a good time and giving a good time to whomever I decided to have sex with, I didn't give a shit what anybody else thought or said.
Bravo to you
Get a brain
EWww
Hooking up has nothing wrong, but people will slut shame because they feel that they possible won't be capable of competing with the muscular hunk or hot horny girl that the girl/guy they are interested in has hooked up, majority of time it is just that.
I am with you. I have been in many situations where I didn't want a relationship but needed a good lay. friends with benefits and hooking up kept me satisfied. Outside of moral obligation personally I dont see why people have to stick their nose in others business.
Yay this human gets it too
Personally I'm not into the hook up culture, but won't judge others who are into it. But if these people manipulate others who are not into the hook up culture to sleep with them, then I will judge them HARSHLY (e. g. pretending they want to have a serious relationship with you, just so they can get inside your pants).
People get deemed "slut" or "fuckboy" because they have a large number of partners, which means they are doing a lot of hookups, i. e., they are very promiscuous. If you only hook up with one or two people, it's a different story.
There's absolutely nothing wrong with it.
Because sex shouldn't be meaningless, it's more about love than anything simply put. But I don't support insulting or harassing people who do hook up with others.
I don't let that bother me, you shouldn't let that bother you. Live your life like you want to. I'm a slut? Okay cool byeee. That's my additude cause when people judge me like that I don't care about their opinion. I'm the "slut" in my friendgroup but I make fun of myself too so always when I say another boys name they already start laughing cause they know another great story is coming. 😂❤ enjoy your life !
Bravo to you
Omg Worst of people are on here
@elizabeta Still better than a Russian trollbot.
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